The Gate

LU is focused guiding for seeing there is no real, inherent 'self' - what do you understand by this? That the self is a belief constructed through a lifetime of conditioning and that LU is a guide to help deconstruct this belief through pointing to the processes of the mind used to create the self. The guiding is to help move from this conditioned ‘self’ belief to no belief.

What are you looking for at LU? I am looking for a guide to help directly point to the experience and processes of the body and mind that construct the self, learn how to identify them, and to learn how to deconstruct them with the least amount of confusion for the liberation from the belief of this self. I am looking for what is there, that is clouded by my beliefs and identities, and to dissolve what isn't there that I believe to be there, and if there is nothing there then to be able to be pointed so that I may have this realisation.

What do you expect from a guided conversation? To be pointed to the processes of the senses and shown or guided through any tools that are available for use to enquire into these processes. To help unbind me from the preconceived ideas of self-realisation or liberation. To help me through confusion that I have with what is and what presence is. I’m open to any help from the guide that can directly point me to Liberation .

What is your experience in terms of spiritual practices, seeking and inquiry? 5 years ago, I sat a Vipassana 10-day silent retreat, and sat one the year after as a student and then another the year after as a helper. During this time, I meditated using Vipassana for 2 years twice a day for an hour and the 3rd year once a day for 1 hour. After this I felt it was mechanical and whilst it was the catalyst for the deconstruction of my Christian beliefs, I struggled with the practice. After an intense period of doubt, I came across Echart Tolle and read ‘The power of now’ this opened something up in me, the questioning of what is. Recently I have spent time, after discovering Ramana Marashi’s Teachings, on Self Inquiry.

On a scale from 1 to 10, how willing are you to question any currently held beliefs about 'self? 10

Hi,
just to write here for the other fellow guides that we are going to try with video call..

Love,
Luchana

Hi Paul,
how we spoke I am posting the questions together with your replies here. And I am going to share them with the other fellow guides.
They may or may not have additional questions for you. In any case I will come to you soon.

Sending love,
Luchana

1. Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in
any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

No, there never was.

2. Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it
starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you
see it now.

The illusion of the separate self is, the identification with an ‘I, Me ,
Myself’ as something separate to the objectified world, the idea of a
feeling, that feels like ‘me’ separate from everything else that happens in
the external world, even separate from the body . This Separate Self is
built on beliefs, thought, and concepts. Thought content and story line,
emotions, feelings are all part of the same, the identity or the illusion of
self.



The separate self starts when thought labels a sensation, the labelling
creates an idea or feeling, or image of the way reality should be, and this
is believed. The differentiation, something is this or that, it creates
opposites and always in comparison, it creates separation and when the idea
of reality is different to reality, suffering happens. The appearance of
continuous thought content feels like a “Me, ‘I’ ‘Self’, everything that
happens, happens around ‘Me’ and is related to ‘Me’, all thought leads back
to ‘Me”, because ‘I am’ separate to everything.



The separate self is seen as an illusion, a house of cards held together
with some paper thin thought content, a bit of sticky emotions, some ideas
and feelings with a sprinkle of belief wrapped up in a ball of concept
called the ‘I’.



The seeing everything as one, experiencing life in this now, the experience
is everything, thought happens and it is experienced (occasionally it is
sticky but is seen through, quickly), tension/contraction happens in the
body, energy in that tension/contraction arises and passes as do the
thoughts that wrap around the tension/contraction. Life is happening and
there is only one, this is recognised, my experiencing is deepening into
more and more being (slowly). The experiencing is happening and everything
is in that experiencing, it’s all happening in that. Experiencing it’s all
one. This is my experience when my attention is in the Now, when my
attention is occupied with daily tasks and living, it just happens, there is
no noticing.

3. How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you
started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

Free and lite, like a weight has been lifted. There is a resting peace
mostly, tension arises as it does in life, contraction in the body thoughts
attached then the story created, it varies, this can be seen through
straight away and sometimes it gets some traction and builds story with
emotion and feeling, but it is short lived and seen through quickly. Before
this dialogue, that same tension and thought would have lasted for hours and
sometimes days, trapped in thought and feelings with build-up of emotion and
contraction in the body.



The last few days, there have been fearful thoughts that arose from
external situations which prior to the dialogue would have trapped me in day
long contraction and emotional turbulence, now they have very little
disturbance and there is quite a lot of clarity in how to manage the
external situations.

4. What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

Seeing thought for what it is, story and content, not continuous, but
individual thoughts connecting, this was the opening to see that my whole
existence was built on an illusion, all I had done was driven and limited by
thought, and then when the ‘I’ was no where to be found, seeing that there
never was an ‘I’, disappointment ensued that everything was for nothing all
the things my identity was built on, not true.



Then there was a lightness like a weight had been lifted and nothingness, a
silence that just was. After being pointed to this, as just being, this
openness only lasted a few minutes, but it was experienced and that is all
that was needed.

5) Describe decision & give examples from experience.

Decision isn’t possible there is no one to decide, happening happens, life
flows and movement happens. This was really seen when a hand was held out, a
thought to move it to the left was experienced, the hand didn’t move. Then
without a thought, the hand moved to the right. This pointed to the seeing
of everything moving and flowing with no decision made to move or flow.

Describe intention & give examples from experience.

I can’t describe it with thought, so I turn inside to see what it is, what
is intention. I can’t find it to describe it. It’s just that which happens.

If this is being typed on the keyboard, it’s just typing, there is no
resistance to typing, so could be called intention, happening without
resistance, as a label or concept.

There is no intention it’s just a concept.

Describe free will & give examples from experience.

The only thing that could be considered free will would be considered by
thought and giving it a label of free will. When everything is just
happening then it happens and very quicky thought wraps itself around the
happening and lays claim to it, creating the idea or concept of free will.



There is no one having free will, no free willer (haha)

Describe choice & give examples from experience.

This is the same as free will, there is only happening and when it happens
then thought wraps itself around the happening and claims it as choice. So
many things to have occurred for the next thing to occur, the 10 trillion
events that would have had to happen for each moment to exist, there is no
possibility of choice.

There is no chooser, no one choosing.

Who is choosing to type these letters and choosing what to type,
making mistakes and rewriting. I look inside and can’t see choosing be made
or anyone choosing, haha no choosing here and no chooser.

Describe control & give examples from experience.

There is no control, there is no one having control. As the heart beats
without being controlled or told to beat, the breathing happens without
being told to breath, birds fly without being told to fly. Everything just
happens and the ‘I’ story believes it is in control.

What makes things happen? How does it work?

Life energy happens, there is nothing making something happen. Happening
just happens and being just is, everything is only now, and everything is
that.

Watching the trees this morning, swaying in the wind, nothing making the
wind blow, no entity or supernatural being just the wind was blowing and the
tree was swaying.

What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience.

There is nothing to be responsible for, only here and now. Being
responsible for something would imply time, past or future events and since
neither exist then how can there be a responsibility for something. In the
present moment life will flow and it happens.

Who or what is to be responsible as there is no ‘me’ or ‘I’, how can there
be responsibility.

6) Anything to add?

Thank you.

Hi again Pail,
there are few independent confirmations from the other guides and there are no further questions for you, which is basically the end of this thread here, but definitely not the END. Awakening as you can confirm in your own direct experience has no end..no? :-)

The admin from the forum will contact you and your name will turns into blue. You will have access to more areas here in the forum and also in FB group.

Thank you for the trust and for the openness and willingness to look. It was a joy to explore together the false idea of separation.

Much love,
and see you soon!
Luchana