The Gate

LU is focused guiding for seeing there is no real, inherent 'self' - what do you understand by this?
That there is no mental 'I' instigating and controlling thoughts, sensory impressions and emotions. That there is no I that needs to be protected or promoted. That the conscious experience of life is a stream of thoughts, impressions and emotions happening by itself.

What are you looking for at LU?
To deepen the realization of the illusion of a separate self. I have read 'Gateless gatecrashers' and was inspired. I have also engaged in guided meditations by Sam Harris, Rupert Spira and others to see the absence of a mental self.

What do you expect from a guided conversation?
To deepen my realization of this important truth (absence of a separate mental self) by personal interaction and guidance. After reading 'the gateless gatecrashers', I wanted to experience such guidance myself. I would be very grateful!

What is your experience in terms of spiritual practices, seeking and inquiry?
I have been meditating for 5 years (I'm 40 years old). I did a vipassana 10day course and a few other retreats (now Zen retreats). It has already had a profound positive impact on my life. I'm also a philosopher teaching at a university and my interest in no self also relates to this (issue of free will and happiness in particular).

On a scale from 1 to 10, how willing are you to question any currently held beliefs about 'self?
10

Hi Mick
(is that what you want me to call you?)

Welcome to Liberation Unleashed :)! It’s great to see you here!
My name is Rali, and I’ll be glad to be your guide if you like.

Here at LU we assist in the exploration of the idea of the separate self. This is a guiding based on experience that brings a shift in perception and is not a debate. It directly points to what IS through the use of exercises, questions and dialogue. What is expected from you is to LOOK carefully to what is being pointed at. It is this simple LOOKING (not thinking) that brings a shift in perception.

Here, we are LOOKING directly into the experience of the senses, which is actually here and now, with the thinking stripped away. It is also known as Direct Experience (DE) or Actual Experience (AE). In this way, we are aiming to discover what is truly happening without the story we tell ourselves. For this process to work you have to answer with 100% honesty, and not relying on thought, imagination or memory - just reporting your direct experience. That would also mean leaving spiritual teachings, philosophies and science away during the inquiry. If you have a meditation practice, please feel free to continue with it as usual – it might come helpful.

Please read through “Liberation Unleashed is not …” in the FAQ’s of LU.
http://liberationunleashed.com/about/faq/#faq-1041

When replying to a question, please use the quote function to highlight the question being answered. Throughout this inquiry, please answer questions individually, not in a bundle. Please watch the below video to learn how to use the Quote function. This will assist us in having a clear dialogue around the questions and answers.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-fAToDNh9hQ

It is advisable that you copy and paste questions asked into Word, answer them there and then copy and paste them to your thread. It will save you time in the long run, if a glitch in the system wipes out your answer.

For the sake of the intensity of the inquiry let’s try to stick to a daily conversation. Of course, life happens, so if you need more time, please let me know. I will do as well.
What time zone are in?
If you're okay with everything so far, we can start.
Love
Rali

Dear Rali,

Thank you so much for proposing to guide me! I gladly and gratefully accept.
I understand what is required of me (looking directly and answering with full honesty) and promise to do so. I'll also try to post on a daily basis. I live in Belgium (GMT +2).

As I pointed out in my first entry, I've read the gateless gatecrashers and now see from direct experience that there is no mental 'I' that is the instigator of thoughts, sensory impressions and emotions. I see that they happen by themselves and that the experience of life is nothing but an unguided stream of thoughts, impressions and emotions.

But I also feel that this insight could / should be deepened and perhaps refined to deliver its liberating promises. I hope you can help me with this.

I very much look forward to take this journey with you!

Sincerely,

Mick

Hi Mick
Please make sure that you are subscribed to your topic. In the top left corner, next to "Post Reply" there is an icon that looks like a spanner. When you click on it there is a menu where you can select “subscribe topic’. Click on it once. If you want to be sure that you are subscribed just refresh the page and if you click again should show now “ unsubscribe topic”. Don’t click on it as it will unsubscribe you :).

I live in Belgium (GMT +2).

I'm also GMT+2. Perfect ;)

First things first, let’s get your expectations out on in the open:

1. What will be different when you realize there’s no separate self?

2. What do you expect to happen as a result of this?

3. What do you want not to happen?

4. What are you hoping for?

5. What is missing?

Love
Rali

Hi Rally,

I'm subscribed to the topic.

To answer your questions:

1. What will be different when you realize there’s no separate self?

I think life will be exactly the same - thoughts, feelings and impressions manifesting themselves in consciousness - but the relation to these contents of consciousness might change. The identification with these manifestations might decrease. Also self-referential thoughts and feelings might diminish - the cramped thoughts and feelings about an 'I' that needs to be protected or an 'I' that needs to be promoted (and if they do manifest, they will not sting as much as they used to, because they are exposed as just thoughts and feelings that don't refer to anything real out there in need of protection or promotion).

2. What do you expect to happen as a result of this?

An experience of life that is more spacious. Less lingering worry or anxiety, less irritation about things not going 'my' way. Less trying to hold onto 'pleasant' experiences and pushing away 'unpleasant' experiences and instead wholeheartedly going with the experience of every moment.
Perhaps even amazement and wonder at the constant flow of conscious experiences.

3. What do you want not to happen?

That the realization of the absence of a separate self doesn’t change anything to the way life is experienced. That it doesn’t lead to the expected results described above.

4. What are you hoping for?

The results described in 2. In particular, I hope to develop a keen sense of wonder, awe and appreciation for life. I hope to fall in love with life, be deeply moved by it.

5. What is missing?
Thanks to a daily meditation practice I have developed a new relationship to my thoughts and emotions. I remain much more equanimous when unpleasant thoughts and emotions manifest, as I’m much less prone to be identified with those. I now am in the habit of tuning in to the sensation of these emotions and – at times – I surprise myself at discovering that these ‘unpleasant’ sensations are not actually unpleasant. It’s just a rush of energy. This has been a gamechanger and I’m so grateful for it.
What’s still missing for the most part is:
1. Lingering low key negative emotional states do still hold me in their grip from time to time (since I don’t realize they manifested and therefore don’t tune into them and keep mentally reacting to them). These are typically caused by self-referential thoughts – worries, irritations, etc.
2. This sense of being in a wondrous flow of experience. The falling in love with life part.

Looking forward to your reply!

Much love,

Michael

Hi Mick

I'm subscribed to the topic.

Great!

Back to your answers...Thank you for your honesty! It can be challenging to become aware of what we really believe. The questions were a means to seeing what expectations you have, as everyone has some “idea” about awakening. There is so much information out there now with so many people sharing their experiences, and “teachers” preaching how it supposed to look and feel, that to have no expectations is almost impossible.

Your expectations are somewhat reasonable, but ultimately, expectations are a hindrance. They cling to an idea of how it is supposed to go, which is not necessarily correct, and this is why I asked you to read the FAQ’s of what Liberation Unleashed is NOT. When realisation happens, it can be very subtle and if there are expectations of any kind, then it can be missed and the guiding becomes very difficult. I can promise you there will be no fireworks; it is just a subtle shift in perception! The only true expectation, that you can have, is that the seeking will end. If there are any other expectations, it's good to acknowledge them and then set them aside. It is all much simpler and ordinary.

3. What do you want not to happen?

That the realization of the absence of a separate self doesn’t change anything to the way life is experienced. That it doesn’t lead to the expected results described above.

Like I said, it is just a subtle shift in perception. There is no an “I” before the inquiry the same way there is no “I” at the end, but we’ll get to this a bit more later.

Please read through “Liberation Unleashed is not …” in the FAQ’s of LU if you haven’t as this might help with unreasonable expectations.
http://liberationunleashed.com/about/faq/#faq-1041

Now…
If you look for the I, what is there? If I say there’s no doer, thinker, experiencer, decision maker, or a witness, what comes up? Where exactly did you look? What exactly did you find? Please describe in detail what appears – feelings, sensations, thoughts, anything?

NB! When replying to a question, please use the quote function to highlight the question being answered. Please watch the below video to learn how to use the Quote function. This will assist us in having a clear dialogue around the questions and answers.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-fAToDNh9hQ

Love
Rali

Hi Rali,

Thank you for your reply!

Your expectations are somewhat reasonable, but ultimately, expectations are a hindrance.

Understood, I will try to let go of all expectations and just see where the chips fall. I’ve also read the FAQs on this.

If you look for the I, what is there? If I say there’s no doer, thinker, experiencer, decision maker, or a witness, what comes up? Where exactly did you look? What exactly did you find? Please describe in detail what appears – feelings, sensations, thoughts, anything?

If I look for the I, I look inward and find thoughts: I’m a man, I’m tall, I am a teacher, I’m a philosopher, I have a specific personal history, I have a name, I run and cycle, I meditate, I’m curious, I tend to reflect on things, I’m a son, brother, father, husband and friend to certain people, etc.
I also find feelings / feeling tones associated with these thoughts (as I do with any other thought). So when I look for the I, I find: thoughts and feelings.
But at its core ‘I’ is a thought that doesn’t refer to a body (I say my body, my arm, so it’s something that belongs to me, but is not ‘I’) or to any of the characteristics (being tall, meditating, being curious, being a teacher, etc.) I associate with ‘I’. These traits are not me (not even taken together), they apply to other people as well. So ‘I’ is nothing physical or mental. ‘I’ is a mental construct that does not latch onto anything.

When you say there’s no doer, what comes up is that there is no central command center that freely and autonomously commands the body to perform certain actions. Rather, the actions of the body happen through processes over which ‘I’ (or anyone for that matter) has no control whatsoever. An action may follow from a thought or decision, but that just happens too (see below).

No thinker – thinking just happens, it is not instigated or controlled or constrained. This I see clearly since there is absolutely no way of predicting what the next thought will be and when it will arise.

No decision maker – Since thoughts just happen and decisions are thoughts, decisions just happen. There is no ‘I’ deciding, only decisions arising in consciousness (produced by processes over which I have no control).

No witness – this is trickier. Thoughts and feelings are definitely being witnessed. There is however no separate I looking at or experiencing thoughts and feelings (as from a distance). The thought that I witness a thought or a feeling is just another thought arising. The feeling of being the subject of experiences is just another feeling. All there is, is an open featureless expanse in which thoughts, feelings, impressions (or any other possible content of consciousness) manifest.
So no mental I with a set of fixed traits and characteristics.

However, and this is why this one is trickier for me, other people do not experience the thoughts, feelings and impressions that ‘I’ experience and vice versa. So yes, I see that there is no separate self with fixed traits, but rather a stream of thoughts, feelings and impressions manifesting on their own accord (and including thoughts and feelings about an ‘I’ being at the source of these). But there still seems to be a separate conscious experience. There is no ‘I’ at the source of thoughts, feelings and impressions, but in a way there seems to be one at the receiving end. Although stripped of thoughts and feelings, all that remains is a featureless open space of awareness.

That’s what I’ve got for now. Looking forward to your reply!

Much love,

Mick

Hi Mick

Before we start let’s just make sure that you understand how to LOOK for no self in the exercises:
There is a big difference between knowing that there is nothing and seeing that there is nothing.
Here is an example to illustrate the difference:

If I ask you what color socks you are wearing right now you have two ways to answer:
1. You can think about it, trying to remember, or guessing what color they are.
2. You can have a look at your socks and see what color they ACTUALLY are!
You will agree that only by looking you could be 100% certain, right?

For the purpose of this inquiry, it is crucial that you are clear about this difference in the two ways of answering and stick only to the second way. We are only interested in looking at and seeing what is actually going on. We are only interested in Direct (Actual) Experience (DE/AE)- the experience right now and right here.

Direct or Actual Experience is:

Seeing
Hearing
Sensing (not emotion - emotion is sensation plus thoughts/labels)
Tasting
Smelling
Thoughts Arising (but not their content, what the thought is ABOUT)

Please let me know if you are clear about this or if you would like any further clarification.
Here's an exercise for you to get super clear on what direct experience is. You can use this photo of an apple or a real apple.


Have a look at an apple. When ‘looking at an apple’, there's color, a thought saying ‘apple,' and maybe a thought saying, "I'm looking at an apple." What about the content of thoughts, what they describe? While these thoughts are known, what they talk ABOUT cannot be found in direct or actual experience. Direct, actual experience is sound, thought, color(sight), smell, taste and sensation.

Taste labelled ‘apple’ is known
Color (visual information) labelled ‘apple’ is known
Sensation labelled ‘apple’ is known (when apple is touched)
Smell labelled ‘apple’ is known
Thought about/of an ‘apple’ is known
However, is 'an apple' actually known? (Or is it just a label?) Is there really an ‘apple’ here, or only color and a thought ABOUT ‘apple’? Can ‘apple’ be found in actual experience?

Love
R

Hi Rali,

Thanks for the clarification.

We are only interested in looking at and seeing what is actually going on. We are only interested in Direct (Actual) Experience (DE/AE)- the experience right now and right here.
Direct or Actual Experience is:
Seeing
Hearing
Sensing (not emotion - emotion is sensation plus thoughts/labels)
Tasting
Smelling
Thoughts Arising (but not their content, what the thought is ABOUT)

Got it, so the only thing I’ll report is what I see, hear, sense, taste, smell and whether thoughts are arising.

However, is 'an apple' actually known? (Or is it just a label?) Is there really an ‘apple’ here, or only color and a thought ABOUT ‘apple’? Can ‘apple’ be found in actual experience?

An apple is only a label. The only thing that is known (as in experienced directly) is color, texture or feel when touching it and taste and smell and sound when taking a bite. What is also directly experienced are thoughts (‘this is an apple, ‘I’m eating an apple’, etc).

So, with this in mind, I went back to your previous pointers.

If you look for the I, what is there? If I say there’s no doer, thinker, experiencer, decision maker, or a witness, what comes up? Where exactly did you look? What exactly did you find? Please describe in detail what appears – feelings, sensations, thoughts, anything?

When I look for the I, there is nothing. When I looked at the apple, there was color and shape, but when looking for the I there is nothing.
When looking for the ‘I’, there is also nowhere to look. I can be aware of the body, thoughts, sensations, but these things are not ‘I’, so there is nothing to be aware of, nowhere to look.
If you say there’s no doer, thinker, experiencer, decision maker or a witness, what comes up is a slight contraction in the chest area and thoughts (such as those described in my previous post).

Much love,

Mick

Hi Mick

An apple is only a label. The only thing that is known (as in experienced directly) is color, texture or feel when touching it and taste and smell and sound when taking a bite. What is also directly experienced are thoughts (‘this is an apple, ‘I’m eating an apple’, etc).

Great!
Just to ensure that you are crystal clear about DE and labels related to it...here's an exercise that you can try as many times throughout the day as you can. Label daily activities, objects and emotions simply as colour/image, sound, smell, taste, sensation, thought as per the apple example.
For example, when having coffee in the morning, become aware of:
Seeing a cup, simply= image/color (just seeing)
Smelling coffee, simply = smell (just smelling)
Feeling the warmth of the coffee cup, simply = sensation (just sensing)
Tasting the coffee, simply = taste (just tasting)
Hearing the spoon stirring the coffee, simply = sound (just hearing)
Thought about drinking the coffee, simply = thought (just thinking)

Break down daily activities into these categories (which are all Actual/Direct Experience) and report back with lists EXACTLY like the one above. Please write a few examples from your daily life.
Love
Rali

Hi Rali,

I did the exercise after reading your message.
While cooking:
- hearing (the food sizzle in the pan)
- feeling (the heat from the stove)
- seeing (the food in the pan)
- feeling (the spoon in my hand)
- thought arising (I will report this to Rali)
- more thoughts arising (should I report that i had the thought to report this...)
- feeling (slight pressure in the chest area)

when eating:
- seeing (food on plate)
- smelling (food on plate)
- tasting
- feeling (fork and knive in hand)
- feeling (food in mouth, down the throat)
- thought arising (it needs pepper)
- hearing (wife and kids talking, the sound of the food being chewed in my mouth, traffic outside)

now, when typing this
- feeling (fingertips on keyboard)
- thoughts arising (about what to type)
- feeling (swallowing, breath)
- hearing (traffic outside, somebody dropping something in the house)
- feeling (the back of my neck, then the movement after thought - I should straighten my back)
- hearing (bird singing, traffic in background)
- feeling (swallowing)
- hearing (traffic, my wife talking to the kids)
...

I'll try to keep doing this from time to time.

Looking forward to your reply,

Much love,

Michael

Hi Michael

Very good!

- feeling (the heat from the stove)
- feeling (the spoon in my hand)
- feeling (slight pressure in the chest area)
- feeling (fork and knive in hand)
- feeling (food in mouth, down the throat)
- feeling (fork and knive in hand)
- feeling (food in mouth, down the throat)

Just to clarify…
Feeling = sensation + thought
So it would be clearer to say
Sensation (the heat from the stove)
sensation (food in mouth, down the throat)

Please just give me a couple more examples so I can see that you get it.

For the next exercise I want you to sit somewhere quiet and observe thoughts.
A thought appears.
In that moment is there anyone or anything which recognises the thought or is being aware of it?
Can you see anything that is separate from the thought and does the thinking?
Did you do anything to make a particular thought or thoughts appear? Could you have done anything to make a different thought appear at that exact moment instead?
Is there anything that is responsible for the thoughts like a traffic cop saying which one to go and which one to stay? Can the flow of thoughts be changed?
Where do thoughts appear from? Do they appear randomly or in a structured way? Watch like a hawk.
Write down a sequence of 5 thoughts in the order that they appear. Now check:
Could you predict the order of their appearance?
Did you know which will be the second or the fourth?
Is it possible to prevent a thought from appearing?
Can you stop thinking a thought in the middle? How long does that last? Test it for the fun of exploration.
Are thoughts 100% true?

What are you, when you don't think about what you are?
Love
Rali

Hi Rali,

Just to clarify…
Feeling = sensation + thought
So it would be clearer to say
Sensation (the heat from the stove)
sensation (food in mouth, down the throat)

Please just give me a couple more examples so I can see that you get it.

Got it!
While eating nuts outside:
Sensation of nuts in my hand, in my mouth
Sound of nuts being crunched
Taste of nuts
Sensation of nuts being swallowed
Sensation of cool wind
Sound of wind in trees
Sensation of fingers typing
Sight of screen, leave falling in periphery of sight
Thoughts arising
Sound of traffic
Sensation of pressure in head
…

F

or the next exercise I want you to sit somewhere quiet and observe thoughts.
A thought appears.
In that moment is there anyone or anything which recognises the thought or is being aware of it?

The thought appears by itself. The recognition of the thought is just another thought (as I write this, I realize this is not the report of direct experience but a thought itself).
As a matter of direct experience, the following happened: sensation of closing eyes, sounds, bodily sensations, random thought popped up, … From direct experience it is clear that there is no intention / effort / action required. The though happens (as sound and sensations happened). There was no action of recognizing or being aware of the thought. So, there is no one or nothing actively recognizing / being aware of the thought.

Can you see anything that is separate from the thought and does the thinking?

All I experienced directly were sounds, sensations and thoughts arising. Definitely no experience of anything separate from the thought doing the thinking. Or of anything or anyone doing the thinking. Clearly the thoughts that popped up were unguided, not consciously nor voluntarily produced. They happened by themselves.

Did you do anything to make a particular thought or thoughts appear? Could you have done anything to make a different thought appear at that exact moment instead?

No, they happened by themselves.
No, I could not have made a different thought appear at that exact moment. I could only fool myself that I consciously produced a thought since that thought would result from a previous thought that just popped up, namely the thought to consciously produce a thought.

Is there anything that is responsible for the thoughts like a traffic cop saying which one to go and which one to stay? Can the flow of thoughts be changed?

No one can ‘decide’ which thought arises, which doesn’t, which can stay, which has to leave. There is no control over thoughts (like there is no control over sounds and sensations).
The flow of thoughts cannot be changed or directed. Since ‘I will think about that’ is also a thought. A thought which ‘I’ have no control over. It all just happens: Thoughts, sights, sensations, smells, tastes, sounds

Where do thoughts appear from? Do they appear randomly or in a structured way? Watch like a hawk.

Thoughts seem to come out of nowhere. They appear randomly. If there is a chain of thinking, where thoughts are somehow connected to previous thoughts, it is often interspersed with absolutely random and unconnected thoughts. And often there are just random, unconnected thoughts. There is also no way of predicting when the next thought will happen. And they don’t come in intervals of similar lengths. Sometimes the wait for a thought is rather long, sometimes the next thought comes very quickly.

Write down a sequence of 5 thoughts in the order that they appear.

Thought about my mother in law.
Thought about the dog I just saw.
Thought about whether to add to the the previous sentence “and petted”
Thought about whether this is the best way to describe the previous thought
Thought about a music festival (after closing my eyes and seeing a pink light)

Could you predict the order of their appearance?

No

Did you know which will be the second or the fourth?

No

Is it possible to prevent a thought from appearing?

No

Can you stop thinking a thought in the middle? How long does that last? Test it for the fun of exploration.

No, I can stop verbalizing the thought in its entirety after having a thought to stop the thought midway, but the thought already happened. It happens in a flash.

Are thoughts 100% true?

No, thoughts can be false, as in not refer to anything in the world or not represent it accurately (e.g. thought of a unicorn or thought that the earth is flat).

What are you, when you don't think about what you are?

Every possible statement about me, would be a thought. So, nothing.

Looking forward to your reply.

Much love,

Mick

Hi Mick

Thoughts seem to come out of nowhere. They appear randomly. If there is a chain of thinking, where thoughts are somehow connected to previous thoughts, it is often interspersed with absolutely random and unconnected thoughts. And often there are just random, unconnected thoughts. There is also no way of predicting when the next thought will happen. And they don’t come in intervals of similar lengths. Sometimes the wait for a thought is rather long, sometimes the next thought comes very quickly.

Very good looking!

While eating nuts outside:
Sensation of nuts in my hand, in my mouth
Sound of nuts being crunched
Taste of nuts
Sensation of nuts being swallowed
Sensation of cool wind
Sound of wind in trees
Sensation of fingers typing
Sight of screen, leave falling in periphery of sight
Thoughts arising
Sound of traffic
Sensation of pressure in head

Actually, in DE there are only sensations (sensing), colours (seeing), sounds (hearing), smells (smelling), and tastes (tasting). The rest are labels/descriptions (thoughts) of these and further thoughts about them.
Feeling the nuts in hand = sensation (sensing)
Nuts being crunched = sound (hearing)
Chewing the nuts = sensation (sensing) + taste (tasting)
Nuts being swallowed = sensation (sensing)
Sight of screen, leave falling in periphery of sight = colours (seeing)

The first part is the description/label of (thought about) what is experienced and the second part is what is actually experienced. Look at the sensation. Separated from the thoughts and mental images that are attached to them…all that is there is raw sensation. Inquire into the sensation and ask if the sensation itself knows anything about ‘nuts’ or ‘hands’. Look and see if the sensation itself is “nutty” or "handy". Are there two sensations - one of the hand and one of the nuts, or one?

To clarify this let’s do another exercise.
1. Please take something cold from the fridge – like a can of cooldrink. When you touch the can, what does more accurately describe your experience:
a. Your fingers feeling cold because of touching a cold can;
b. Coldness - sensation labelled “cold”? With eyes closed, where does the cold appear? Observe the order in which the details appear

2. When touching the display, which one of these three is the most precise description of the direct experience of touch, here and now?
a. I am touching the display
b. A finger is touching the display.
c. Touching.

Love
Rali

Hi Rali,

Thanks!

The first part is the description/label of (thought about) what is experienced and the second part is what is actually experienced. Look at the sensation. Separated from the thoughts and mental images that are attached to them…all that is there is raw sensation. Inquire into the sensation and ask if the sensation itself knows anything about ‘nuts’ or ‘hands’. Look and see if the sensation itself is “nutty” or "handy".

The sensation itself knows nothing of ‘nuts’ or ‘hands’. The sensation is not ‘nutty’ or ‘handy’. The sensation knows nothing in fact – not even hardness, dryness, etc. These are all imposed labels.

Are there two sensations - one of the hand and one of the nuts, or one?

There is only one (kind of) sensation.

To clarify this let’s do another exercise.
1. Please take something cold from the fridge – like a can of cooldrink. When you touch the can, what does more accurately describe your experience:
a. Your fingers feeling cold because of touching a cold can;
b. Coldness - sensation labelled “cold”? With eyes closed, where does the cold appear? Observe the order in which the details appear

Answer: b. sensation labelled cold describes it more accurately.
The cold appears in this open space of consciousness. Then thoughts arise ‘it’s my fingers feeling cold’ ‘it’s the can being cold’. But first there is the raw sensation of coldness.

2. When touching the display, which one of these three is the most precise description of the direct experience of touch, here and now?
a. I am touching the display
b. A finger is touching the display.
c. Touching.

Answer: c.
‘I am touching the display’ and ‘a finger is touching the display’ are thoughts imposed on the direct experience of: sensation and color (sight).

Much love,

Mick