The Gate

Good evening,
My name is Alvaro and after some time seeking I consider I have seen throught the illusion of the I. I would like to learn how to guide in order to help other people. If you need to ensure that I am done with the "no-me" issue, I will cordially answer to any question you ask.
Thank you.

Hello Alvaro,

Glad to see that you'd like to guide. I'll be happy to have a chat with you.

As you're already familiar with using this forum and the process that we do, I'll just recap that: We'll be writing each other usually at least once a day. If something comes up, we'll send a notice about it. It's important that you write openly from your current experience. Does all this sound agreeable?

To get started:

1. How did this seeing through the illusion of self came about? Please write in as much detail as possible.
2. Are there doubts?

Hello Olenko, I'm sorry for answering a week after. I am having some busy weeks.

As you're already familiar with using this forum and the process that we do, I'll just recap that: We'll be writing each other usually at least once a day. If something comes up, we'll send a notice about it. It's important that you write openly from your current experience. Does all this sound agreeable?

Yes, I agree with that. I hope I can write once a day at least.
Ok, so I previously had a thread with a guide from The Gate - Interational (Spanish) who helped me to see that I did not exist. I think it took me a month to see there was no "me" but I was constantly disturbed by logic and thoughts about control. Besides, I had a burning desire for peace (it was more an addiction rather than a mere desire because it was horrible and intense) because "I" had previously (some years ago) reached a preaceful state - sort of short Enlightement. Finally I saw there was no one behind those thoughts about control and peace, my two greatest barriers. Nowadays, there is no doubt about what the "I" is and how life functions. No I when seeing, smelling, tasting... No I, just a concept, a feeling that points to nothing. No object nor subject. When seeing, for example, no front/behind, no space, no distances, no far/near, no separation between objects, only colour. Spaceless taste, smell, touch and sound. No one behind action. Thoughts appearing by themselves, effortless. The same with emotions and physical movement. This "body" (in fact I can't even find a body here as a separate thing or entity) belongs to no one. Life living itself. Control, free will, responsibility... just illusions. Choice is only another thought ("I'll do this/that). Experience without experiencer. I do not know what else to say... It is really simple, evident.

Hello,

Very sorry for taking so long to answer! I stopped checking this thread after 4-5 days of no answer, and had forgot to subscribe to it.

How is it going these days? What you wrote, sounds very good! The old conditioning doesn't fade away in an instant, but is usually a long process. So especially in the beginning, doubts are normal, just as having the same desires as before. But when you constantly rest in the seeing that there's nothing behind those, no-one to become free; that it is the believing in the idea of "I am not free" that gives rise to the accompanying emotions and the feeling of "not-being-free", then slowly this "wheel" of thoughts and emotions starts to loose its pull, giving room to more and more actual feeling of freedom.

Nowadays, there is no doubt about what the "I" is and how life functions

So lets continue with,

1. What the "I" is? How the self illusion works?
2. How life functions?