Stuck in memory
Posted: Fri Jun 19, 2026 2:30 am
LU is focused guiding for seeing there is no real, inherent 'self' - what do you understand by this?
In immediate experience there is no independent entity referring back to a "self". All evidence exists in thoughts and memories as a story built on childhood conditioning.
What are you looking for at LU?
I have had numerous glimpses and realisations that has since been conceptualised by the mind which has lead to doubt and confusion. Any attempts to look again with a beginners mind is quite difficult with these experiences to recall. I think there are some fixations or sticky points that I may be overlooking that I would really appreciate a realised mentor to help me see.
What do you expect from a guided conversation?
To be challenged and held accountable in my experiencing where if I were to continue to pursue alone, usually ends up in concept or memory. To help push me beyond my limits and point out what I could be assuming or unseen in my experience.
What is your experience in terms of spiritual practices, seeking and inquiry?
Its been a couple of years starting out with meditation and breath work. Then I started following Angelo DiLullo and followed his self enquiry videos which really rocked the foundation of my world. I read Angelos book "awake" then went on to read the three pillars of Zen, Eckart Tolle, Jeff foster, Gateless gatecrashers, Loch Kelly, Adyashanti to name a few. I also see a Psychologist who I am grateful for being quite open and realised who has helped me along the way. With him I have also done EMDR and internal family systems. Internal family systems has helped me understand my conditioning and reactive parts and I still practice it daily. Through this I have directly touched the innocence within me that I understood is in everyone. Breath work and meditation are also still daily practice.
On a scale from 1 to 10, how willing are you to question any currently held beliefs about 'self?
11
In immediate experience there is no independent entity referring back to a "self". All evidence exists in thoughts and memories as a story built on childhood conditioning.
What are you looking for at LU?
I have had numerous glimpses and realisations that has since been conceptualised by the mind which has lead to doubt and confusion. Any attempts to look again with a beginners mind is quite difficult with these experiences to recall. I think there are some fixations or sticky points that I may be overlooking that I would really appreciate a realised mentor to help me see.
What do you expect from a guided conversation?
To be challenged and held accountable in my experiencing where if I were to continue to pursue alone, usually ends up in concept or memory. To help push me beyond my limits and point out what I could be assuming or unseen in my experience.
What is your experience in terms of spiritual practices, seeking and inquiry?
Its been a couple of years starting out with meditation and breath work. Then I started following Angelo DiLullo and followed his self enquiry videos which really rocked the foundation of my world. I read Angelos book "awake" then went on to read the three pillars of Zen, Eckart Tolle, Jeff foster, Gateless gatecrashers, Loch Kelly, Adyashanti to name a few. I also see a Psychologist who I am grateful for being quite open and realised who has helped me along the way. With him I have also done EMDR and internal family systems. Internal family systems has helped me understand my conditioning and reactive parts and I still practice it daily. Through this I have directly touched the innocence within me that I understood is in everyone. Breath work and meditation are also still daily practice.
On a scale from 1 to 10, how willing are you to question any currently held beliefs about 'self?
11