Feeling very close, but still miles away

[squeakyclean]

LU is focused guiding for seeing there is no real, inherent 'self' - what do you understand by this?
I have read a number of books on the subject (Rupert Spira, Angelo Dillulo et al) and have a conceptual grasp of there being no 'self'. In practice this seems to be just outside of my grasp as far as recognizing it at an experiential level. There is no self, but it still seems to be hanging around.

What are you looking for at LU?
The 'nudge' that will allow me to see beyond the intellectual. I love the analogy of the fact I used to believe in Santa Claus, but as soon as the belief was seen through/dismissed, the idea of a Santa Claus became laughable. I would like to experience this no-self so tangibly that this is no longer any doubt. I would like help in finally seeing through it.

What do you expect from a guided conversation?
Some pointers, based upon my current understanding (not sure if that is the right way of putting this), that help me see through the veil which is covering the truth. I feel I am very close, yet so far away.

What is your experience in terms of spiritual practices, seeking and inquiry?
I have a background in NLP, Timeline therapy and Hypnosis, which I'm aware (now) is more about fixing the thinking than seeing the truth of the 'I'. I had so many breakthroughs with NLP that seemed huge, but then dissipated over a short period of time. I looked at the Three Principles (the Sydney Banks stuff) and found that interesting and a similar focus to non-duality. Recently I have attended an Angelo Dillulo online retreat and have been doing some work with a guide. I have recently had a profound experience after reading a couple of chapters of the Gateless Gatecrashers, wherein my sense of time got really distorted. I couldn't discern whether something had just happened, was happening or I'd just imagined this. It was a bit like my 'timeline' had somehow been juggled and re-sorted. This lasted about 12 hours and has settled down now.

I feel as though I have been on a seeking path for 40 years (I'm 66 now). I've meditated sporadically, had various forms of talking therapy etc. all aimed at, frankly, being happier and less stressed. On one hand I feel it was a waste of time, but on the other it was the path that brought me to non-duality and here.

On a scale from 1 to 10, how willing are you to question any currently held beliefs about 'self?
10