The Truth Revealed

[AlexAzul]

LU is focused guiding for seeing there is no real, inherent 'self' - what do you understand by this?
I understand that there is no me as I have always thought. There is a body, thoughts, feelings, sensations — and none of those equates to an independent ME that is separate and apart from other people and things in this world. There is no little me making choices, creating, exploring, growing. All those things are merely happening.

What are you looking for at LU?
In the most direct terms, I am looking to clarify where I am in the awakening process in order to best serve the continual deepening and remembering of truth, and then looking for guidance on how to progress from where I currently am.
About a year ago at my first Angelo Dillulo retreat I was "officially" introduced to non-duality, inquiry, and the notion that I — and anyone — could actually awaken. This catapulted and redirected my spiritual search in earnest. Two months ago (Feb. 2026) I participated in a month-long silent retreat and had quite a few realizations, including what I think was a moment — or more — of no-self awareness.

One of the issues I've been dealing with since starting this "I can actually awaken" process is doubt: when am I understanding something and when am I knowing it? I am not sure if the no-self realization I had on that retreat was an extremely deep UNDERSTANDING (and remains such) or if I actually experienced and now KNOW it. Things feel shifted, and coming here to LU is a chance to deepen in this process. I haven't done a lot of sharing and question-asking in this exploration and would so welcome someone who knows more than me to help me focus and clarify.

What do you expect from a guided conversation?
Ideally I would like clarity on where I currently am in this process and support moving forward. I love that you stress honesty and direct experience. I'd like to practice expressing my direct experience honestly — I haven't had much practice, and I tend to hesitate, doubt myself, and fear that I'll get it wrong. I feel that the more I share and lay myself out honestly, the better. I thank you all so much for creating this forum and for offering this support.

What is your experience in terms of spiritual practices, seeking and inquiry?
Though I have been on a spiritual path for over 30 years, in retrospect it seems more to have been a path of self-improvement — seeking a happier life through self-reflection, observing my limiting patterns and beliefs, and exploring beliefs about life and afterlife in an unconscious effort to soothe and calm myself. I've explored anything I felt drawn to: meditation, various religions and philosophies, healing modalities, afterlife beliefs — you name it.

At the start of 2023 — prior to any knowledge of awakening, non-dualism, or the possibility of personal liberation — I had a major surgery which led to what I now think might have been a heart-opening awakening. For approximately 1–1.5 years after that, I lived in a state of deep contentment, love, and peace. I remember feeling like I didn't need anything or anyone to be as satisfied as I was, and that if nothing changed for the rest of my life I'd be gratefully well. I innocently wondered if I had somehow become enlightened, though at the time I didn't think that was a possibility for me.

In Dec. 2024 I was formally introduced to non-duality and self-inquiry at my first Angelo Dillulo retreat, after which I signed up for as many retreats as possible and have been exploring all things awakening in earnest. Practicing inquiry always felt a bit squirmy — like trying to hold dry sand in my hands — until this past February's month-long silent retreat, where it finally took a better hold. I had many moments of deep insight, even revelations, including a moment of no-self around the "where am I" question. In retrospect, doubt comes in and says: was that true knowing or just very deep understanding and imagining?

These days I spend much of my time listening to non-dual talks, focusing on sensations, practicing natural meditation, doing TRE and Neurodynamic breathwork, and focusing on reactivity. It was through that February retreat that I was introduced to Liberation Unleashed — through Chris Guimond, who recommended Christian Michelberger and her book Finding Awakening. I am currently focusing on reactivity, which feels like the right thing — her guidance suggests this practice is best done after first-stage awakening. Although I'm not clear where I stand in this process, I'm following my intuition and continuing with reactivity work (fetters 4/5). I am so ready to dedicate to this with a willing guide and deeply appreciate the opportunity. There is nothing more important to me right now.

On a scale from 1 to 10, how willing are you to question any currently held beliefs about 'self? 11

[Anastacia42]

Hi Alex,

What you wrote tells me that you may have already had the first shift in awakening as you think you have. There are some videos on doubt that are very good. I'll post the link below.

https://youtu.be/a_8N331jpA4?si=wHE8KmhO7n9uwLPp

Also, Watch these, please:

https://youtu.be/vJQcD588g2w

and

https://youtu.be/PUDzrCLlrj4

This is just a beginning.

We can start at the beginning and go through basic Pointers or I can give you our checkpoint questions to gauge where you are and go from there.

At LU we only guide through the third fetter. After that you can join some of the 10 Fetter groups or Pernille & Todd or Vince.

Loving ❤️