Am here to deconstruct my ‘self’
Posted: Fri Oct 31, 2025 1:53 am
LU is focused guiding for seeing there is no real, inherent 'self' - what do you understand by this?
From my understanding there is only unbound awareness, like the source of life itself. However, most of us become entangled in the illusion of the world which we perceive through our five senses, leading us to view ourselves as separate. The mind/ego creates narratives and positionalities about this 'self' we think we are, cutting us off from truth
What are you looking for at LU? To dismantle all that is false in my perception, to help me dissolve the ego/mind and become a channel of unconditional love. I want to speed up the process of awakening so I can get entangled less and less in thought forms.
I'm hoping Liberation Unleashed can point out my blind spots and help me increase my awareness of what is coming from 'mind' and what is coming from my intuition. To be honest I now see this as my life path and value nothing more than realisation of Self. I want to let go of my false sense of self to this permanent flow state and trust completely. I'm sick of muddying my perception with assumptions, narratives and descriptions of things when I know just how beautiful life can be when all the chatter ceases. After having glimpses of no mind, I just want to increase the capacity to realize this, and believe your process could really help.
What do you expect from a guided conversation?
I guess I expect to have deeply embedded beliefs challenged. It could really open me up to seeing where I'm still holding on to thought forms which are ultimately forms of resistance. Having someone guide me through this could be really helpful because me just reading about non-duality and self-inquiring/meditating is good but I could still be forming a 'spiritual ego' and might be unaware of when it is in play. The guided conversation could help me dismantle everything false and bridge the gap from perception to direct experience.
What is your experience in terms of spiritual practices, seeking and inquiry?
I first got into Dr Joe Dispenza’s meditations a couple of years ago, practising “becoming no one” and feeling into infinite space to shift my emotional state into gratitude and love. At the time, I was doing it all for self-improvement and manifestation — chasing mystical experiences and success. Looking back, I was trying to control life rather than let it unfold. I avoided my shadow, judged myself for feeling negative emotions, and didn’t realise how much I was suppressing.
Then life stopped me in my tracks. I got ill with what doctors called long covid or chronic fatigue — constantly exhausted, sometimes spitting blood, and unable to do the things that once defined me. I’d always seen myself as the athlete, the hard worker, the guy who could force life to bend with enough discipline. But now I could barely get out of bed. That collapse of identity was the first crack — I began to see I couldn’t control anything, and something deeper in me started to turn inward.
In that space, I found Letting Go by David R. Hawkins, and it completely resonated. It was my first introduction to non-duality. Instead of trying to create or fix reality, I began surrendering to it. I started feeling into emotions instead of resisting them, and slowly began to make peace with pain as pure sensation rather than a personal punishment.
Soon after, I had an appendectomy, and later unexplained pain returned, which doctors couldn’t explain. I kept practising surrender throughout — feeling the pain, staying with awareness rather than the mind’s stories about it. Even in the hospital, I could sense that life was guiding me deeper into trust and humility.
Then my dad passed suddenly from a heart attack, and that completely broke me open. The grief became my teacher. I spent hours just sitting with raw emotion, crying, and resting as the awareness behind it. There was agony, but within it, a profound stillness — like something was dying that was never real in the first place.
Since then, self-inquiry has become the centre of my life. I spend most days surrendering into sensation, investigating the “I” that claims ownership of experience. Fear, pain, and even the thought of death have become invitations into peace. I’ve had moments of feeling my awareness being “sucked out” of the body during sleep or meditation — what used to cause panic now feels like dissolving into the infinite.
Life now feels lighter and more effortless. The world looks more vivid, almost luminous — the texture of reality itself feels alive. I find myself more still, less reactive, and more open. The journey started as a search for power, but has turned into a falling away of the one who was searching.
Overall, I’m in a place where everything has become a means for awakening. I often inquire, “Why is this happening for me?” rather than “to me.” Still, I have moments of unconsciousness, resistance, or contraction — times when I catch myself identifying with mind and seeking relief rather than resting as awareness. There’s a longing to stabilise the glimpses of unconditional love into a fully lived truth, and I sense that what remains is the ego’s fear of total dissolution. This is where I feel Liberation Unleashed can help — to see through that last layer of illusion and live from what’s always been here.
On a scale from 1 to 10, how willing are you to question any currently held beliefs about 'self?
From my understanding there is only unbound awareness, like the source of life itself. However, most of us become entangled in the illusion of the world which we perceive through our five senses, leading us to view ourselves as separate. The mind/ego creates narratives and positionalities about this 'self' we think we are, cutting us off from truth
What are you looking for at LU? To dismantle all that is false in my perception, to help me dissolve the ego/mind and become a channel of unconditional love. I want to speed up the process of awakening so I can get entangled less and less in thought forms.
I'm hoping Liberation Unleashed can point out my blind spots and help me increase my awareness of what is coming from 'mind' and what is coming from my intuition. To be honest I now see this as my life path and value nothing more than realisation of Self. I want to let go of my false sense of self to this permanent flow state and trust completely. I'm sick of muddying my perception with assumptions, narratives and descriptions of things when I know just how beautiful life can be when all the chatter ceases. After having glimpses of no mind, I just want to increase the capacity to realize this, and believe your process could really help.
What do you expect from a guided conversation?
I guess I expect to have deeply embedded beliefs challenged. It could really open me up to seeing where I'm still holding on to thought forms which are ultimately forms of resistance. Having someone guide me through this could be really helpful because me just reading about non-duality and self-inquiring/meditating is good but I could still be forming a 'spiritual ego' and might be unaware of when it is in play. The guided conversation could help me dismantle everything false and bridge the gap from perception to direct experience.
What is your experience in terms of spiritual practices, seeking and inquiry?
I first got into Dr Joe Dispenza’s meditations a couple of years ago, practising “becoming no one” and feeling into infinite space to shift my emotional state into gratitude and love. At the time, I was doing it all for self-improvement and manifestation — chasing mystical experiences and success. Looking back, I was trying to control life rather than let it unfold. I avoided my shadow, judged myself for feeling negative emotions, and didn’t realise how much I was suppressing.
Then life stopped me in my tracks. I got ill with what doctors called long covid or chronic fatigue — constantly exhausted, sometimes spitting blood, and unable to do the things that once defined me. I’d always seen myself as the athlete, the hard worker, the guy who could force life to bend with enough discipline. But now I could barely get out of bed. That collapse of identity was the first crack — I began to see I couldn’t control anything, and something deeper in me started to turn inward.
In that space, I found Letting Go by David R. Hawkins, and it completely resonated. It was my first introduction to non-duality. Instead of trying to create or fix reality, I began surrendering to it. I started feeling into emotions instead of resisting them, and slowly began to make peace with pain as pure sensation rather than a personal punishment.
Soon after, I had an appendectomy, and later unexplained pain returned, which doctors couldn’t explain. I kept practising surrender throughout — feeling the pain, staying with awareness rather than the mind’s stories about it. Even in the hospital, I could sense that life was guiding me deeper into trust and humility.
Then my dad passed suddenly from a heart attack, and that completely broke me open. The grief became my teacher. I spent hours just sitting with raw emotion, crying, and resting as the awareness behind it. There was agony, but within it, a profound stillness — like something was dying that was never real in the first place.
Since then, self-inquiry has become the centre of my life. I spend most days surrendering into sensation, investigating the “I” that claims ownership of experience. Fear, pain, and even the thought of death have become invitations into peace. I’ve had moments of feeling my awareness being “sucked out” of the body during sleep or meditation — what used to cause panic now feels like dissolving into the infinite.
Life now feels lighter and more effortless. The world looks more vivid, almost luminous — the texture of reality itself feels alive. I find myself more still, less reactive, and more open. The journey started as a search for power, but has turned into a falling away of the one who was searching.
Overall, I’m in a place where everything has become a means for awakening. I often inquire, “Why is this happening for me?” rather than “to me.” Still, I have moments of unconsciousness, resistance, or contraction — times when I catch myself identifying with mind and seeking relief rather than resting as awareness. There’s a longing to stabilise the glimpses of unconditional love into a fully lived truth, and I sense that what remains is the ego’s fear of total dissolution. This is where I feel Liberation Unleashed can help — to see through that last layer of illusion and live from what’s always been here.
On a scale from 1 to 10, how willing are you to question any currently held beliefs about 'self?