The Gate

Hi Stacy

The reason I sort of dropped off previously is that I really struggled with butt chair. I did hand desk quite a lot last night and again this morning.

I would like to continue doing this exercise a few more times. Is that ok?

Thank you

Certainly. Practice HandDesk & then see if you can apply that to ButtChair.

Let me know if you have questions.

Loving,

Thank you.

My mind is not letting me answer these questions. All it is saying on repeat is I can feel my hand, I can feel the chair. It’s so frustrating as I came back here very open thinking I would “get” it.

I appreciate your patience.

Yes, well we are not asking your mind. Ignore that.

Here, let's try this:


Sports Exercise

Please note that you will have to check the link when using this exercise, to make sure it is still viable, as sometimes they are removed from Youtube.

The following link is a 7 minute clip of a soccer game. If you prefer another sport…please feel free to find one to do this exercise with.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yy5pL-myDzw

1. Watch one minute with the sound turned OFF, watching ‘people’ messing about with a round thing on a field, up and down, up and down. Let it sink in, the whole experience.

2. Once the first minute is completed, now watch another whole minute with the commentary turned ON.

Notice the differences.

Notice how the commentator (thought) offers lots of know-how, even advice. It seems to feel as though they can influence, somehow, what is going on, as though one outcome is much preferred to the opposite outcome. The commentary may seem to heighten any supporter feelings which are there, and call for an identification with one team or other, and with the importance of the game itself.

3. Now turn the volume OFF AGAIN and just watch the action with NO audible commentary, the shapes moving around on the screen etc. Again notice all the differences in what is appearing as experience.

4. Now turn the volume ON again and ignore what you think you know thought is talking about, and just notice it as sound.

What did you find when doing this exercise? Is the commentary on the soccer game a necessity for the play to happen?

And in the same way, is the inner narration of thought a necessity for the play of life to happen?

As always, relax & have fun!

Loving,

What did you find when doing this exercise? Is the commentary on the soccer game a necessity for the play to happen?

The commentary is not necessary, the game proceeds without the commentary.

And in the same way, is the inner narration of thought a necessity for the play of life to happen

No thoughts are not necessary. I see that life happens regardless of thoughts

Good.

Remember, the point is not about giving right answers. It is about experiencing the exercise over and over again until you see. I did ButtChair only for 4 months.


Nature Exercise

Go out into nature and spend some time watching the movement of the whole. See how clouds move, trees swing, leaves wiggle, grass moves, insects, birds - all move all the time.

Then move focus to sensations and see how they too are in constant motion, thoughts come and go, sounds, colours, sensations come and go.

Notice that everything is part of one movement.

Then close your eyes and see if there is a line between you and out there, between you and life itself.

If yes, where is the boundary?

Is there an inside and an outside of Life?

Is there something which is not included in the movement of the whole?

Is there a witness that is watching life happening from a distance?

Is witnessing part of the one movement too?

Is there anything which is not just happening?

Go out, come back and tell me what you found.

Loving,

If yes, where is the boundary?

There is space and lots of it. But then occasionally it is disturbed by my mind saying that’s your hand, you feel it etc. Then my mind says the mind appears in the space or the hand appears in the space.

Is there an inside and an outside of Life?

No


Is there something which is not included in the movement of the whole?

No, everything is in the whole. All apart of one.

Is there a witness that is watching life happening from a distance?

Yes.

Is witnessing part of the one movement too?

Not sure about this. Does the witness have a voice?if so yes, if not it’s another part of the mind

Is there anything which is not just happening?

No

Hi

Mostly. Direct Experience but what about this:

Is there a witness that is watching life happening from a distance?
Yes.

Really? A separate witness? Where is that in DE?

Direct or Actual Experience is

Seeing
Hearing
Feeling (Sensation, not emotion. Emotion is Sensation plus made-up thoughts & labels)
Tasting
Smelling
Thoughts Arising (but not their content)



Loving,

Really? A separate witness? Where is that in DE?

Something answers the questions. Something is aware of there being space etx

Does this awareness necessarily mean a "separate self?" Could it just be part of "what is, part of the flow of life?"

Where is this awareness in Direct Experience?

Try this:



Explore ‘Sense of Self'

Let’s say that you have lost your keys and you swear that you left them in your coat. You go to look and check all the pockets - the keys are not there. You swear they must be as that was the last place you remember them. You have a vivid memory of putting them there after you left the house. But when you check they are not there. At this point you can keep believing that the keys are in your pocket, or you can admit you were mistaken.

This is just like that. You may see clearly that the self is an illusion but still feel a sense of self - just like the keys. But feeling something to be true and seeing that it is or is not is different. This is why we may find ourselves coming back to your expectations at the start and at the end.

Now, I’d like to ask you to explore this SENSE of self very-very thoroughly. Not by thinking about it, but by FEELING it. Keep the focus of attention on the sense of self and inquire:

Does the sense of self have a location?

Does the sense of self have a shape or a size?

Does the sense of self say or communicate anything?

If the answer is yes, how does the sense do this exactly?

Does the sense of self have any characteristics or attributes?

What is the sense of self ‘made of’? An image? Sound? Taste? Smell? Sensation? Thought?

What is found?

Loving,

Have you re-read your thread? That would be a good idea.

Loving,

Hi Stacy

Thank you so much for the advice and pointers. I’m going to spend today working on this exercise and exploring a sense of self thoroughly.

I’ve reread the thread. A lot has fallen away and my answers to the original questions about self and my fears etc would be different now. That is mainly down the original time I spent on the forum with you.

I will check back in later or tomorrow.

Thank you again. I am very grateful for your time.

Kara

Hi Kara,

You're quite welcome. I will watch for your replies.

Much love,

Does this awareness necessarily mean a "separate self?" Could it just be part of "what is, part of the flow of life?"

I’m not sure what the awareness is, it’s just there.

Where is this awareness in Direct Experience?

It’s not any of the direct experiences. It’s just there, a sort of space.

This is just like that. You may see clearly that the self is an illusion but still feel a sense of self - just like the keys. But feeling something to be true and seeing that it is or is not is different. This is why we may find ourselves coming back to your expectations at the start and at the end.

This is exactly it and has described exactly what is going on for me

Does the sense of self have a location?

No

Does the sense of self have a shape or a size?

No

Does the sense of self say or communicate anything?

No however, if I ask this question the mind answers saying who am I etc but then there is just space in response to it.

Does the sense of self have any characteristics or attributes?

No

What is the sense of self ‘made of’? An image? Sound? Taste? Smell? Sensation? Thought?

These questions have taken me the longest. When I ask these, the answer is again space/peace. But then the mind gets into a spin and asks what exactly is my self made of and I say things like body, thoughts etc etc. but there is something that knows this to be untrue. Before I would have listened to those thoughts but now when I repeat the question there is just space.

What is found?

Mostly nothing just space.

I’m not sure what the awareness is, it’s just there

That's right! It's a mystery. It's just there.

But then the mind gets into a spin and asks what exactly is my self made of and I say things like body, thoughts etc etc. but there is something that knows this to be untrue. Before I would have listened to those thoughts but now when I repeat the question there is just space.

Perfect! Yes. That's just what the mind does. When we LOOK there is peace & spaciousness.

Can you now say 100% that there's no separate "self? " Can you SEE that it was a story?

If so would you like to answer our traditional final questions?

Loving,