The Gate

Hi Kamen,

I really can't find Kamen and this is not intellectual, but because you ask, I have to tell you that I also can not lie,
about the fact, that there are times, when this old habitual energy arises and the belive of the separate self kinda
comes like a cloud.

Yes, this is normal. At the beginning, for almost everybody, there is a flip-flopping back and forth between seeing and identifying. Even after the self is seen through. The old conditioning of identifying is still strong, and there is a pull back to identify. So at this stage, which can last some time (and it cannot be known in advance how long it will take), looking should go on to help to stabilize this flip-flopping.

What I find is not only that there is no character, but there is actually nothing at all. I mean, everything that appears is also nothing - life, birth, age, cahracters, people... everything is nothing. Just concepts

Yes :) these are all concepts, trying to describe something.

What we usually do at this stage of the process is to ask some final questions that I will show to other guides to see if there is anything that we might have missed and that my guiding was clear. Other guides might or might not have further questions for you.

Are you ready for these final questions?

Vivien

Hi Vivien,

yes, I am ready.

Thank you very much.

Kamen

Hi Kamen,

Please answer the following questions with some detail please, and answer what's true for you rather than any sort of 'ideal' answer. Also please provide examples where asked.

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form?
Was there ever?

2) Share in your own words what the illusion of separate self is and how it shows up in experience. Also, through your inquiry, what is different now?

3) How does it feel to see this?
What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over; made you look?

5) a) Describe decision, intention, free will, choice and control. What makes things happen? How does it work?
Give examples from your own recent experiences to how things happen and how things work.

b) What are you responsible for? Give examples from your own recent experiences to how this works.

6) Anything to add?

Vivien

Hi again,

just wanted to say, that I am ready for further investigation, as long it is needed, if you think, that you could have missed something.

Kamen

Hi Kamen,

How things are going? Are you still with me?

Vivien

Hello Vivien,

I didn't receive notification from you.

Ofcourse. Could you please give me some move time?

Thank you,

Kamen

Of course, no problem :)

Hello Vivien,


thank you, that you gave me time.

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form?
Was there ever?

No, this is just some mental form. This separate self does not really exist and never existed.

2) Share in your own words what the illusion of separate self is and how it shows up in experience. Also, through your inquiry, what is different now?

Somehow a ME thought or ME thoughts arise and n ot only this but they are alwas there. So whatever happens links with this ME thoughts. But they could subside anytime. One never remembers time, when the ME thought has not been there.
The difference now is, that there is a feeling of recognition what is here and what is real and what are false mental formations and most importantly the ME thought.

3) How does it feel to see this?
What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

It is liberating. An incredible lightness arises. The questions are less. Life is so natural. THe difference from the beginning is that somehow I know much more deeper that there is no ME. this knowledge is much more natural. Yes, this ME stays most of the time, but it is how it is and it is recognised as a tought.

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over; made you look?

I can not really tell. It happened gradually.


a) Describe decision, intention, free will, choice and control. What makes things happen? How does it work?
Give examples from your own recent experiences to how things happen and how things work.

There is no one that does anything. Everything that happens happens a lone. I do not "raind" or "shine" or "eat", etc. If there is a feeling of someone doing it this is jsut a thought. ME ME ME ME. Nothing more.

b) What are you responsible for? Give examples from your own recent experiences to how this works.

For nothing really. But if this feeling arises... well, I am not responsible for this too.

6) Anything to add?

I am so grateful for showing me this! Thank you so much!

I want to add that there are still fears, pains etc, but I would say they are less. I am not Ramana Maharshi. I mean, I want to make clear that ME thoughts are still there. I tell you this, because you maybe need to know exactly what is going on. That doesn't bother me at all. It is how it is. Maybe someday it will not be like this or maybe it will be like this.

Also this searching and pushing has reduced its power with 95%. I still meditate 2-3 hours, but I do not pursue something like before.

Thank you again with all my hearth!

Much love,

Kamen

Hi Kamen,

Thank you again with all my hearth!

You are welcome :)

I am going to ask other guides to have a look at the thread to ensure that I have covered everything and that my pointing has been clear. This may take a few days. Other guides might have further questions, and if they do, I will bring them to you.

Vivien

Hi Kamen,

One of the guides ask you to please give examples for each for these questions from your daily life:

5) a) Describe decision, intention, free will, choice and control. What makes things happen? How does it work?
Give examples from your own recent experiences to how things happen and how things work.

b) What are you responsible for? Give examples from your own recent experiences to how this works.

Thank you,
Vivien

Hi Kamen,
You can reply to the previous questions if you want to, but other guides have no further questions for you. Thank you for being open and willing to look.

Keep an eye out for an email notification notifying you of a PM (private message) from the forum inviting you to join our aftercare groups on Facebook. If you don't receive an email notification, you can access your PM's from the forum once you have logged in. The PM also details other resources available to you.

Your username will change from green to blue which indicates that you have had the realisation of there being no separate self. This thread will be moved to the ‘Archive’ section of the forum, but you will be able to access it.

You can contact me at any time if you have any questions via private message here on the forum, or via Facebook if you decide to join our groups there.

Please don’t forget that this is just a beginning. It’s the beginning of cleaning up of conditionings, which needs further looking to help them to dissolve. All sorts of old beliefs, emotions and feeling can come up to see them and feel them. Please don’t stop looking if you want things to deepen.

If something comes up and you don’t know how to deal with it, please feel free to contact me, so we can have a look. I do further looking private sessions (video calls) and emotional inquiry. If you are interested, you can read more about that on my website (you can find the link in my signature).

Vivien

Hi Vivien,

thank you again. Ok, then I would like to take my time to answer those questions and I will do it.
Yes, I will continue to look. I will join the FB group as well. I wish you all the best!

Warm greetings,

Kamen