looking for a guide

[Mad biker]

The English in your 6.14 entry was too poor and I need more punctuation as well. Even capitals and full stops would help now that your stuff is a bit longer.

[pokerpro]

sitting here... hand moves up and down...decision made to shut eyes...decision made to type mmmm there is just typing...i cant find anyone deciding to do anything but things seem to happen.... nobody makes decisions...there is no ownership of decisions

[pokerpro]

sorry didnt do very well with puntuation etc was just trying to get stuff down on keyboard

[Mad biker]

sitting here... hand moves up and down...decision made to shut eyes...decision made to type mmmm there is just typing...i cant find anyone deciding to do anything but things seem to happen.... nobody makes decisions...there is no ownership of decisions

Great observations, lovely to read this.
Have you now 'got it'? Have you now 'got the point'? Have you now seen through the delusion of the existence of some sort of a personal agency? An imagined 'I' or some kind of 'me' which operates somehow quite separately from the basic five skandhas of form, feeling, thought, choice and consciousness? An imagined entity which somehow seems to 'run' these independently observable constituents of the basic psycho-physical continuum, of the basic homo-sapian human ape?

In the course of our enquiry we have looked into these skandhas and you have found them to be 'empty of self-hood' in the classical language of 'The Heart Sutra', or lacking any kind of 'I' or 'me'. Is that the case?
How do things look now?

[pokerpro]

i am not sure if i have got it
yesterday yes today not so sure i guess that means no
stories that go around in my head still feel too sticky sometimes
practically i am going through the enlightenment quotes app finding new tasks to engage with regularly
right now as i do things i can spot the endless labeling process that the mind is involved in
maybe something is holding me back
i know there is no me looking for nothing however
i am not sure how quickly turning my attention to the story should dissolve it or how thoroughly ?

[Mad biker]

Sure, not quite there yet, no probs, that's fine. Let's just stay with this now:
'Who' makes 'your' decisions?
Just take some mindful breaths and sit in Direct Experience of this moment.
'Who' makes 'your' decisions?

[pokerpro]

decisions just appear decisions just appear
i dunno what else to say
i can tell you what little breakthroughs i had in last few days but is that irrelevant i think so
i dont seem very excited anyway reported thought
will say more tomorrow

[Mad biker]

i dont seem very excited anyway reported thought

The above is just crap English mate!
I gave up trying to decipher it. Just tell me again what you meant here.

Yes, I do indeed very much want to hear about your; '...little breakthroughs [you] had in the last few days...'

[pokerpro]

i dont seem very excited ........is a reported thought i was trying to say[probably no clearer]
little breakthroughs were in the realm of realising that other people were not you in as much as I was not I
i noticed that i was focusing on my own isolated experience rather than including others emptiness
which of course is a creation of I once again methinks

[Mad biker]

Great observations.

Let's just look at this 'thing' another way:
If everyone (and I do mean everyone without exception; everyone for millenia as well as everyone who has seen it via this forum in recent days) if everyone variously describes it as being:

"...stunningly simple..."
"...not very complicated!"
"...pretty obvious..."
"...surprisingly ordinary"
"...are you fu*king serious? Is THIS all it is!?"
"...an eerily ordinary, almost stupidly simple recognition..."
"...Christ, it's a drop-jaw no brainer!"

Does this help to throw light on what that 'thing' might be?
I want you to see this as a real question in a spirit of genuine enquiry rather than any questioning of your intelligence. This is just not an intelligence 'thing' at all. So please do give it a bit of breathing space and reflection. Here is a quote from a recent seer through, who 'got it' this week. Might the answer to my above question be as simple as this?:

"I know I saw it to some degree very early on in this process (as it is really not very complicated!) but this stirred up a lot of conflict and turbulence for a couple of weeks, some of which was around the idea of choosing and deciding...but looking at my experience from one moment to the next I could see there are decisions but couldn’t find a decider. Conditions are it. The Buddha didn’t say everything is pratitya samutpada plus a little chap with a clipboard, twiddling knobs in a control box - he said depending arising is it...full stop! I had never realised this before. I had always found a way to import the ‘I’.... albeit in the guise of an every changing self, into the Dharma.
If ‘I’ don’t exist how can ‘I’ decide, intend, choose, or control? All sorts of processes play their part in the arising of decisions, intentions and choices. So for instance I can be sitting in meditation and at some point find myself stopping, getting up and leaving the room without really knowing why. A whole set of conditions come into play and the decision to do that arises. No one decides it. It seems that this holds for everything ‘I’ do. Indeed my attempts to appropriate thinking egotistically stymie it."

[pokerpro]

this persons experience rings absolutely true with me especially the ideas of ...... an ever changing self as a sneaky way to get around the actual truth of prattica samutpada.... and appropriating thinking egotistically fucking things up..
these two things have been part of my armor to stop the seeing of the truth
okay will reflect more on this and get back to you later today
thanks

[Mad biker]

OK great.
See you later today because sustained momentum really counts with this process.

[Mad biker]

Don't be confused or misled by thoughts arising with I or me as subject. Why wouldnt they?The latter does not mean they are real or true or anything more than mere thoughts.

[pokerpro]

mmm yes that was confusing me sometimes.
a thought arises with me as subject and i convince myself that that might be me sometimes
but that is only bullshit... again it is another thought... it is never anything but just another thought

[pokerpro]

also feels like we are exhausting all possibilities of belief in a cotrolling witnessing self