The Gate

OK. Thanks a lot. I am glad we cleared that up.

How about trying to answer these again?

Please answer in terms of your "direct experience" - what you perceive right now. I suggest you look (or do some experiments) for each question. E.g. there one's below about choice - so go ahead and choose something, paying attention the whole time to try to see if there's a "charlottez" that does the choosing. That way, if you put in the attention and pay attention to your direct experience, you'll be very clear about what exactly is going on.


1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

5) Describe decision, intention, free will, choice and control. What makes things happen? How does it work? What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience.

6) Anything to add?

Armstrong
I thank you and look forward to having another look at the questions you have asked and will come back soon.

OK

Armstrong I have been travelling so sorry for the delayed reply.
1-2 There never was a separate self- yes i used to believe there was, but realize now that there is no such thing.The I as we say is nothing or no one, it's just what we have been so used to saying, I fell this I see that , but there is no I we are everything and everything is us, I totally get that, but we do I think sometime fall back into the I especially if there is a problem or something we are not expecting then comes the story of the victim , the blame and all of that, but if I remain separate very quickly and stay present i't so easy as we see there is nothing, just what is now.
3- I am happy to see and understand all of this as it makes life so much softer and easier, as I type now I right now am just focused on the letters on the keyboard and the sound of my finger tips as they tap each letter,i also hear a lot of background noise as I am outside , but i am just focused on the letters and not what i am typing as i do not know what i will say, that is also a good feeling there is no worry or thought into the next minute just now.
4- I was pushed over by loss and suffering, I had always since a child known that this life as we see things could not possibly be IT as it were, i had and still am interested in anything mystical, astrology, space, all of that ( except now i understand its of no matter ) so i went along just i think knowing that there was more and in time it would be revealed and i truly felt that. So although I have not been a searcher as such, I have always been open, and everything has happened as it was supposed to happen at the right time for me, perhaps i was not as open as i thought, but the loss i experienced opened things much more and I think that is probably when a serious search was looked at, and still in saying serious search - it has all come to me that is how it feels and I am so much the better for everything i now understand.
5-6 free will as I understand it - there is no choice, everything happens, yes we can say yes or no, and in our everyday lives we have to do these things quite a lot, but ulimatley there is no choice as most things that happen are all for a reason and if we just let things and choices happen on their own as much as possible it is i think always the best outcome, especially when we think we can make choices for others better than they can for themselves, it seems sometimes we do not credit others with that, and yet when others are left to make their own choices that we feel may not be the right ones, it again is usual they are the right decisions for that person. because what is happening for everyone is what is supposed to be happening for them right now and everything leads us to something else that we were supposed to experience for one reason or another, and in a silly way i guess this was what i meant when i mentioned previously the path, not a real path or cycle - but just the events in our life experience that takes us to another experience. What a wonderful life and the knowing of all of this just make the feeling so very exciting.Again Armstrong i do hope i have covered all, I am still hearing sounds but the loudest sound is the of my fingertips gently touching the keyboard.

Ok so you're back. Thanks for answering.

When you look back at your answer, is it in terms of direct experience?

One thing that seems to happen a lot with language is imprecision. Eg someone will say, "that situation is a mess" - not getting that their conception of something (the situation) another conception (a mess) and the judgment (messes are "bad") is an elaboration of some thoughts and feelings about things (eg disgust/dislike). If someone just stuck yo direct experience, they might say, "I'm feeling disgust and upset when I see the food particles on the sofa."

When I read your answer, you mention choices and things happening for a reason. Do those things exist in your dire t experience? If they don't exist in your direct experience, please answer again, in terms of your direct experience. If they do exist in your direct experience, please describe them more carefully, in terms of your senses.

Armstrong i agree and i am i think guilty of the imprecision, i write as i speak and sometimes that seems incorrect as i am speaking with feelings and of course that is not always to the point if that makes sense, so forgive me for going around the houses as it were.
No the things that happen do not exist anywhere, again my fault for over explaining, what i meant was things and experiences that we have are just things that happen whatever they may be, but the happening of them changes how we may feel or see things thereafter ( well that is the hope that we learn and feel differently from all experiences )
I will say no more than this and hope this has now made clear what i was trying to explain, i tend to over explain and maybe this is why i confuse what is sometimes just a simple sentence.
Look forward to your reply.

Ok. To be clear: you haven't done what you've agreed to do, multiple times. You agreed that you'd answer in terms of your direct experience. You haven't done that. I've pointed this out multiple times and asked you to do it - and you haven't done it. This has happened at least 5 times now - probably more like 10. I'm too lazy to read the previous pages to give you an accurate count.

None of that matters - as long as you are willing to try right now.

Please answer the questions again, this time in terms of direct experience.

You might try pretending that you're explaining things to someone who is seven year old, who thinks in concrete terms. If you say "meaning", "purpose" or "intention" he or she would ask, "what's that".

It is my understanding that you understand what "direct experience" is; please re-read your answer to make sure it is in terms of direct experience.

If you give me an answer that isn't in terms of direct experience, let's end things.

Armstrong i feel as though I am being told off. Are you saying that I should find another guide. I am sorry but you seem a little angry had thought that these guided questions and answers were to help a person see and understand,I now would prefer that you tell me what to do.

What is that like in "direct experience"?

You've got some story - "he told me off. He shouldn't have said that -- blah - blah - blah" -- but what is your actual experience?

You agreed to answer in terms of your direct experience. You know what that means. Please do it.

Armstrong when he told me off it made me feel sad, I felt as though my truth was not good enough

Armstrong
I do not know what I need to do, as you have not responded, do I need to find another guide ? I do not know quite how this should be, i would really like a reply one way or the other if and when you can.

Hi Charlottez, vince here. i am stepping in for Armstrong. (hope you don't mind)
If you are happy for this, please give me a bit of a summary on what you recognize about (what you previously called) I/me/myself.
Include in this some details of how (if) your daily life-ing has changed since you started here at LU.

love

vince

Vince
No I do not mind thank you for stepping in.I have always known that there is no I , well i say always this last few years. I understand that the I, is just awareness of thought.This past few years it has been an on going realization that there is and never has been an I, It seems funny now thinking back and even now seeing how serious some people are over little things because they take them for being something, when really there is nothing.
Since LU nothing has really changed , but I am looking forward to discussions.Look forward to hearing back from you

Hi Charlottez, g'day.
From what you say, you have already realized what LU exists for. That is you realize that the I (personal Self) is and was always a concept.
Is this recognition deeply embedded in your daily existence, of is it a theoretical (intellectual) belief ?
Are you aware of a continual change (since seeing this reality) as a result of this recognition ?
What are your expectations from our "discussions" ?

Good feelings to you

vince