Expectations
- there should be a certain harmony beneath the everyday experience, once the illusion of ‘I’ is seen.
- The ‘I’ and ‘me’ thoughts shouldn’t arise.
- There shouldn’t be any time spent in the fantasy world of thought. At least no significant time.
- Experience should always be calm and detached.
- There should be a constant awareness of the illusion of the ‘I’.
Are you aware that ALL of these expectations are very UNREALISTIC? Every single one.
Yes, they are.
- there should be a certain harmony beneath the everyday experience, once the illusion of ‘I’ is seen.
And what would experience this harmony?
As there is movement toward the seeing of this, a feeling of lethargy and tiredness begins to emerge. While it is being described on this page, now, it dissolves.
What would experience this harmony? Nothing. It would arise experientially, and inevitably fall away. And there’s nothing there to claim it. Or to cast judgement on it, or measure it.
- The ‘I’ and ‘me’ thoughts shouldn’t arise.
This is probably the most unrealistic of all.
There has NEVER EVER been a self, and yet thoughts of I/me/my/mine has still arisen.
So WHY would this change at all?
Can you see how unrealistic and pointless this expectation?
Yes, I see. Thank you. There is no magical movement into a parallel world, once the illusion of ‘I’ is seen. Reality is reality.
There is no reason for this to change at all.
- There shouldn’t be any time spent in the fantasy world of thought. At least no significant time.
This is similar to the previous one.
This expectation is about getting into and staying in a different STATE than what is normally happening.
WHAT is it that is spending or not spending time in the fantasy world?
Is seeing through the self is a STATE where thoughts have changed with no I/me in it, and ‘who-knows-what’ won’t be lost or spent time in fantasy world?
There is no spending of time in a fantasy world. There is nothing that can ‘be lost’ anywhere.
The idea of ‘being lost’ in a fantasy world only apply to the ‘I’. Seeing as there is no ‘I’, the desire is nonsensical.
- Experience should always be calm and detached.
So you are trying to get rid of all the spectrum of emotions, and having only the pleasant ones?
Yes, please! :) That’s a joke, sorry.
Again, back to the ‘I’ not existing, and reality being full and complete and perfect as it is. It requires no fine tuning or modification. Only the ‘I’ could or would place demands on the quality of reality :) To thrash a cliche, the emotions and thoughts really are like the weather. Apparently random, and beautiful in all manifestations, if there is no judgement. As there is no ‘I’, the emotions and thoughts come and go like this. Freely.
There is still a belief that emotions are happening to a me.
All states and emotions are fleeting. States and emotions will come and go, but the freedom is in seeing that if there is a chord, tape, or glue sticking it to something or someone, a simple check for what it's sticking to reveals the nature of reality.
Look right now... is there an emotion appearing? Find the glue, chord, or tape that is sticking it to something.
Nothing right now. But I see your point very clearly.
Thank you :)
Without relying on what society and conditioning has told you, close your eyes. Is the emotion ACTUALLY inside something or is it just sort of hanging somewhere unlocatable? - Really examine this closely.
It’s sort of lingering in the background of experience, like background music, but when attention moves towards it, it sort of fades away.
And “experience should be detached” – again, this is a desire for a state for the self who will not suffer from any emotions any more, since it’s detached and separate from them.
But WHAT is it that could be detached and thus being outside of experience, separate from it?
Only experience can be experienced. There is no possibility of separation of the seeing of experience and the experience itself.
There should be a constant awareness of the illusion of the ‘I’.
So you want a different experience being switched on continuously?
Another desire based around the belief in the ‘I’. It’s silly. Requiring that reality modify itself.
Does it matter if there is a constant awareness of the illusion of the ‘I’?
No it doesn’t. It doesn’t change the fact that there is no ‘I’. Only the believed in ‘I’ would require this consoling.
If there is no continuous awareness of the illusion of the ‘I’, does it change the FACT that the self is an illusion?
No it doesn’t. Whatever way reality twists and turns, the ‘I’ is still illusion. Regardless of what thoughts or feelings arise. There is nothing there.
These expectations have fallen away just through observation and examination.
Are you saying that ALL of the expectation you listed has fallen away, or just some?
All of them. When you said the first time, “Why would reality change just because there is a realisation of the illusion of the ‘I’?”, it didn’t seem to go deep. But on successive days, the truth of it seemed to go deeper and burn through these old expectations, showing them to be silliness, and based on the premise of there being an ‘I’.
Which ones that are still active, even if just a little?
There is an apparent vigilance in examination regarding these expectations.
As it stands, none of those expectations can stand or be given consideration.
If it does feel like something has ‘hooked me’, I’ll let you know straight away.
Thank you, Vivien :)
Dion
