The Gate

Hi Bodhi,
Okay, thanks! I didn't remember doing that. That is what I am used to calling myself, so you can refer to me as Lynn Marie if you want. I would like to respond to your last post.

The fact of the matter is that in order to "See what is true", we need to drop everything that we have learned as a conditioned response. When what you are really after is the truth, the truth itself demands that you approach it without any of your own convictions.

That is a tall order! I don't know how that can happen other than to continually inquire into all responses and let them go by seeing again and again that they have no substance and do not belong to a self. It would need to happen through direct experience only and not through my own convictions. There is no me who is going to do that, but that seems to be the direction that this consciousness is moving.

So in wiping the slate clean, here stands before us Lynn Marie, having been through the process of seeing directly the fictional nature of her identity. Having discovered that who she may once have thought of as her"self" is nothing but a collection of stories and conditioning and thoughts and responses and habits. When examined for "truth", the identity itself has no substance. It only appears to have substance when it is not being looked at - just like a mirage.
Lynn looks to see if she has any control whatsoever and concludes that she does not, given that she cannot find a self that is in charge

.

Yes, we are on the same page with the above statements.
Love and gratitude,
Lynn Marie

Excellent Lynn

So since there is no "you" to be found, it is easy to conclude that what is here is "awareness, consciousness, one-ness"...."whateverness" we want to call it - right?

Note that this jumping to answer the question puts our "identity blinkers" on again. We are once again caught in the limitation of what trapped us an an individual self before - simply because we have once more defined the undefinable!!

This takes the magic out of living, it removes the mystery of moment by moment engagement with what IS actually here. Providing ourselves with certainty robs us of the visceral engagement with the experience of being.

If you could sit silently and allow what is showing up to show up - and let it engage you as if you were a child rapturously noticing for the first time that you were alive. That there was life here and now.

Not as an identity, not as any label, but as life itself - engage fully with it and let me know what happens.

My warmest regards and love - I look forward to speaking with you again after your exploration :)

So since there is no "you" to be found, it is easy to conclude that what is here is "awareness, consciousness, one-ness"...."whateverness" we want to call it - right?

Yes, there is an aware presence here in the absence of a "me." However, I do not see that as a Self or an identity. And, I don't think it can be defined. Yet, it is known by being it.

Providing ourselves with certainty robs us of the visceral engagement with the experience of being.

I know only one certainty, and that is the experience of Being. Making anything else a certainty will rob me of this experience.

If you could sit silently and allow what is showing up to show up - and let it engage you as if you were a child rapturously noticing for the first time that you were alive. That there was life here and now.

I have been experiencing more silence and being in the present moment than I ever have, ever. I experience an innocence in that silence, an open curiosity towards whatever shows up. I am closer to moment to moment engagement with what IS than ever before. I am very grateful for this shift and am giving myself to it fully.

I deeply appreciate you staying with me through this process.
Love and gratitude,
Lynn Marie

Hi again Lynn :)

Yes, there is an aware presence here in the absence of a "me." However, I do not see that as a Self or an identity. And, I don't think it can be defined. Yet, it is known by being it.

Is there a "you" who is "being it", or is there just being-ness itself?

I have been experiencing more silence and being in the present moment than I ever have, ever. I experience an innocence in that silence, an open curiosity towards whatever shows up. I am closer to moment to moment engagement with what IS than ever before.

Is there a "you" and an "IS"-ness or is there just what IS?

Look carefully for this "you" and see if it is real or ephemeral. See if there is only now what IS.

Explore and share :)

Hi Bodhi :)

Is there a "you" who is "being it", or is there just being-ness itself?

Is there a "you" and an "IS"-ness or is there just what IS?

This has been difficult for me to see. It seems that there is only being-ness itself and Is-ness, yet if I self-reflect it appears to create a subtle sense of a "me" that is being aware. But if I am not self-reflecting on this, there is no noticing of a me, just being.

I am mainly focused right now on seeing identification being pulled out of thought and resting in the silence below thought. There has been a shift in this direction. It is "just happening" but some effort to not follow thought is also "just happening" when needed.

That's the update for now!
In gratitude,
Lynn

Hey Lynn

This is a good place to be. Could I ask you to spend some time in an open exploration of this "just happening"? Look at life, look at the body, look at others, look at space and time....allow yourself to expand, even to explode :)

Spend time in nature if you can.

I look forward to your update.

My warmest regards

Hello again Bodhi!

Could I ask you to spend some time in an open exploration of this "just happening"? Look at life, look at the body, look at others, look at space and time....

I have been looking at "just happening" as life goes on. Internally, it is seen that thoughts, following thoughts, noticing that, being quiet, following thoughts again, deciding to meditate...is all just happening. There is no one to praise if I am quiet and no one to blame if I am following thought a lot. And, feelings and sensations in the body are just happening. Others seem to just be happening as well. They act and move according to their conditioning, just as I do, unless we are "just being", then there is a natural, quiet flow of experience. Nature is definitely just happening. It's easiest to see in nature. Space and time...just happening, no control over that.

I have been contemplating the darkness in the world. If it is just happening, then there is no one to blame. So who or what is responsible? It seems that the darkness has been created out of a collective ignorance of true nature and millions of choices that just happened. It's all coming from the same Source. So the Source is responsible for all the suffering...for what purpose? I don't know.

I have also been contemplating the belief that we create our own reality and can manifest anything we want, if we see and feel it clearly. Yet, I can't find a self that would be doing that. So, that would just be happening too.

Namaste,
Lynn

Hi Lynn!!

Sorry about the late response, I got a bit tied up with some "just happenings" at my end :)

It's clear that you see that there is no "you" doing anything and that things are "just happening".

And again it is easy to step from here to the questions about "Source" and morality and the reasons for why things are a certain way.

Who or what is wanting the answers to these questions? How can these questions be effectively resolved?

Much love :)

Hi Bodhi,
Nice to hear from you!

And again it is easy to step from here to the questions about "Source" and morality and the reasons for why things are a certain way. Who or what is wanting the answers to these questions? How can these questions be effectively resolved?

When I look, I see that he sense of a separate self is what wants answers to those questions. It wants answers so it can gain more of a sense of control again. It seems to be continually trying to re-create itself...as if it has a survival instinct and is fighting to survive. And, I see that there is no self to be doing that. It just happening.

I would appreciate any assistance you can give me regarding this movement to re-create a sense of self. it happens every time thought is engaged in and believed (just happens) and then it is seen (just happens). I don't know what can be "done" about this other than accept and allow, but that would have to just happen too!

Love, Lynn

Hi Lynn

Apologies for the delay in getting back to you - I have had limited Internet access due to a technical problem which I am still trying to solve. Seems like I have left you hanging for a bit - sorry about that.

So each time there are thoughts, there is a "Sense of self" that is created. And it is easy to see now, when you remember that there is no "real or inherent" self, that this is just an automation at work - just another appearance of the mirage.

When you imagine a rainbow knowing full well that it is just an imagined appearance, there is not tension in that. However it seems that when there is the appearance of this imagined "I", there is some tension around that? Would you say this is the case?

What you thought you were when you behaved as a "Self" is not really what you are. When you look for what you are what you find is a beautiful mystery.

The shackles of the old self tend to hold on - it's just a habit. What replaces this? Can you live the mystery or do you still want to understand it's workings?

Love as always

Hi Bodhi,
I hope you have resolved your technical problems.

it seems that when there is the appearance of this imagined "I", there is some tension around that? Would you say this is the case?

The shackles of the old self tend to hold on - it's just a habit. What replaces this? Can you live the mystery or do you still want to understand it's workings?

Yes, I have had some tension around following thought and thereby creating a sense of self, but it is lessening. I can see that it is a habit and the more it is allowed to just happen without tension the more it is relaxing.

The shackles of the old self have been replaced with a deep, abiding peace. Today, I mostly experienced peace and silence. It didn't matter what the mind was doing. The more the peace deepens, the less I care about anything that is going on. Then it becomes okay to just live the mystery of it all.

For awhile, my mind was agitated about not having control. As I inquired into that, I saw that it was because of old conditioning about Life not being trustworthy and having hurt me in the past. Once I saw that, it relaxed. I also wanted to understand how Life was manifesting such darkness on the planet. I don't know the answer to that. For some mysterious reason the duality of darkness and light is being played out on planet Earth. However, I am noticing a willingness to let go more into the mystery and trust Life. I am so grateful for this! All my life I have not trusted Life. But now it is easy to trust the pervasive peace that is so predominate in my experience.

I am so very grateful for your guidance in this process Bodhi! I think I am okay on my own now. Please let me know what you suggest from here.
In gratitude and love,
Lynn Marie

Hi Lynn

My technical issues continue, sadly, but hope to have an answer soon :)

I loved your response, it brought a smile to my face.

We have all had hurt, pain and sadness in the past. For some, it fuels the spiritual search. We wish for some respite, some relief from this burden of pain - of humanhood.

We then come up with these concepts - of everlasting peace, of bliss, of resting as awareness, of (dare I even say it)...enlightenment. Actually what happens is, these concepts are sold to us.

When the self inquiry gets here, to this point, where there is a brick wall - then these too are seen as just concepts. They are more "stuff" for the self to hold on to - to remain shackled with.

True freedom is release, not control. It is letting go of all concepts.

This brick wall is the gate. We cannot pass with our concepts. When we drop the concepts (or they drop us) we see we were already there. Just that we wore these clothes of ideologies to make our "little self" feel better.

True better is letting go - being free - soaring like an eagle, wings unclipped through doctrine. No matter how well meaing that doctrine is.

When we look for ourselves, we cannot find our self. What we find is mystery. As soon as we label it, or try to contain or control it, or try to define it - the magic is gone.

Which is true then Lynn? Do you need to call it anything? Do you need to mis-trust the magic?

I am so very grateful for your guidance in this process Bodhi! I think I am okay on my own now. Please let me know what you suggest from here.

All I need to know is if the shift has been significant, and if you feel it is permanent :)

Love and my best as always.

Hi Bodhi,
Sorry for the delay. I have been having life challenges like my house being burglarized and my wallet stolen with all my identification, credit cards, checkbook, etc. I think there has been a significant shift in how I experience such things. There is a deeper surrender to "what is", knowing that there is no separate self to do anything about it. I am experiencing more peace than I ever have in my life. I am seeing that I do not have any control, so I can just enjoy the ride, no matter what happens. And I don't have to understand it. I have people telling me that the burglaries (4 this year!) are "karma being cleared." These are just concepts. And as you say, freedom is letting go of all concepts. I can see in myself and others the ridiculousness of believing the concepts to be true. I don't know why things happen. It doesn't matter. It is a mystery. What matters most to me now is being the peace/freedom/joy that is always here no matter what happens.

All I need to know is if the shift has been significant, and if you feel it is permanent :)

It seems significant, but I really don't know if it is permanent. My sense is that it could go a lot deeper. But I have no control over that!
With love,
Lynn

Hey Lynn

My turn to apologise - sorry for the delay on my part.

How are you doing now? Your shift is heartwarming and I want to check with the other guides to see if they have any questions for you. I'll check and get back to you.

Much love

Hi Lynn

Sorry for the late response. I have sent you a PM (Private Message) - please do let me know if you have received it.

Thanks and much love