Halfway There;-)

[ty0]

Yes, being busy and distracted and triggered does not hinder your "progress", it shows you triggers and conditioning that is valuable to look at now that you're less prone to resisting and avoiding discomfort.

Hahah, I have vague thoughts and plans about what I want to do, but active goal-setting isn't something I do anymore.

[Lennie]

Yes, being busy and distracted and triggered does not hinder your "progress", it shows you triggers and conditioning that is valuable to look at now that you're less prone to resisting and avoiding discomfort.

Yeahh I can relate to that. we'll see what comes up.

I feel like using this no-self thing as concept is also dissolved. Funny how the mind can grab on to something new or chase that 'bliss' feeling. Like it was always already there but trying to grab it now because of 'a new concept' isn't gonna work.
Only in DE it's all clear and obvious..About there's no seperation. Life is just going on as before now..

Haha vague plans..That's how I'll approach it now:-)

[ty0]

Is there anything else you want to explore?

[Lennie]

Good for now. Thanks Tyler:)

[ty0]

Sure. Maybe give it a few days then let me know if you'd like the final questions

[Lennie]

Ready for the last questions:)

[ty0]

Here ya go

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

5) Describe decision, intention, free will, choice and control. What makes things happen? How does it work? What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience.

6) Anything to add?

[Lennie]

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

No. Only what I perceive now in forms as sight, sound, sensations, smell, taste and thought.

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

That there is some kind of being that has control over this life, is separate from everything else, and is responsible for everything that is happening. The most fascinating part for me was the identification with my thoughts. The narrator with which conversations are held in my head felt so familiar, and that’s where I experienced the strongest sense of separateness.
It has now become clear to me that everything sensed—including thoughts—appears in that which perceives it at every moment.

3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

I have gone through several phases after this realization, from total bliss to a sense of emptiness. At the moment, it feels kind of neutral. It feels somewhat freeing because there is less resistance to what is being felt.

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

I became frustrated when I didn’t get these final questions earlier. It forced me to take another look, and I realized I still had a strong tendency to turn this into another new concept again—something to achieve. The phrase ‘You don’t know anything, and neither do I’ hit me hard. Suddenly, I saw it: there is no ownership of knowledge by anyone. It simply arises in the moment.

5) Describe decision, intention, free will, choice and control. What makes things happen? How does it work? What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience.

Intention and free will are just ideas. Everything happens on its own, without effort, even before the thought about it shows up. There isn’t someone doing it.
A choice is simply made, and I’ll never know what it would have been like to choose something else. The idea of the choice appears first as a thought, and I can notice that.
The same goes for choice and control—they’re an illusion. It always feels like I made the choice after something happens. That thought still comes up, but now it often makes me laugh.

6) Anything to add?

I appreciate the guidance and the clarity I’ve found here. Thank you Tyler and good luck with writing songs:)

[ty0]

It has now become clear to me that everything sensed—including thoughts—appears in that which perceives it at every moment.

Can you elaborate more on this? What is that which perceives everything? What is perception?

[Lennie]

Can you elaborate more on this? What is that which perceives everything? What is perception?

I don't know what it is. But maybe i have to re-write it, it's a bit unclear. Everything being sensed, including thoughts are all happening now. It does not appear in something. Perception is all that the senses gather to experience and understand.