Seeing what is

[Elad]

Hi Geza,

Sounds great! Lets just stay close to what feels right for you, yes? And keep calibrating to that...

So, here is the next pointer:

As you go about your day (and night), in all kinds of normal situations, alone or together with others, pay attention to the sense of self, the sense of me, mine, I, Geza... What is it? What does it consist of? How does it change across situations? How does the feeling of it change accross situations, including from more to less comfortable?

Don't try to make it something else deeper/clearer more real/less real then what it is. Just pay attention to how it is, how it seems, by itself.

Let me know what is discovered.

[NoUserFound]

Thanks Elad!

Most of the time, there seems to be no awareness of “I”. Then, from time to time, briefly and suddenly, something shifts: there’s a sense that something transforms. Perhaps a shift of perspective?

At this moment of shift, it is noticed that activities were performed, just until now, without having this awareness. There’s a relief at this moment: moving from anxious (discomfort) and closed to something open and spacious and light. There’s a sense that “I” has just got liberated(?) during the shift.

After this shift, I try to see, hear and look for this “I” but I can’t find it. As if it was just a dream in that moment of shift.

Then, the cycle repeats.

A side note:
I sense that I'm still trying too hard here. I have now spent 2-3 hours actively thinking about this exercise. Am I supposed to do that?:) I guess I’m still trying to come up with concepts instead of "just" noticing? I feel like that I spent a lot of time on walking in circles during this exercise and got to nowhere.

Thank you
Geza

Hi Geza,

Sounds great! Lets just stay close to what feels right for you, yes? And keep calibrating to that...

So, here is the next pointer:

As you go about your day (and night), in all kinds of normal situations, alone or together with others, pay attention to the sense of self, the sense of me, mine, I, Geza... What is it? What does it consist of? How does it change across situations? How does the feeling of it change accross situations, including from more to less comfortable?

Don't try to make it something else deeper/clearer more real/less real then what it is. Just pay attention to how it is, how it seems, by itself.

Let me know what is discovered.

[Elad]

Hey Geza,

You’ve already spotted a key point—thinking about it isn’t what’s needed here. The effort to figure this out, to find the right concept or explanation, is just another movement of mind. Instead, let’s make this lighter and simpler.

Don’t analyze. Don’t search for a conclusion. Just *look*—many times, for short moments. What *actually* shows up as “I” before any thoughts about it?

You mention those “awake moments” where something shifts—good. Right there, just as the sense of openness and relief appears, is there actually an “I” that gets liberated? Or is it just a sensation, an experience arising on its own?

Also, notice: when you look *after* the shift, the “I” can’t be found. Beautiful. Is it ever truly there, or is it only assumed in hindsight?

Let go of the effort. The shift happens on its own, doesn’t it? So instead of trying to make something happen, just stay curious—many short glimpses, no pressure. Look, notice, and let it be simple.

You’re right where you need to be.

Let me know what you find.

[NoUserFound]

Hey Elad,

Thank you!

There’s seeing (through my glasses), hearing (the road), feeling (sensation in my stomach), and thinking happening. I don’t see any self here, only the activities themselves are noticed.

During some activities, there’s more comfort (e.g. when having a walk) or less (e.g. when feeling the sensation in my stomach).

And then there’s a sudden, momentary “shift” at random times.

This shift comes with a sense of openness, spaciousness, relief, and neutrality. It feels like waking up from a dream. At this shift, I don’t see any self, I see only openness.

Then thoughts arise interpreting the shift and the past, as you also said, in hindsight.

A thought comes up while doing this exercise: Where is the self, after all, if I can't see it anywhere? :)

Geza

Hey Geza,

You’ve already spotted a key point—thinking about it isn’t what’s needed here. The effort to figure this out, to find the right concept or explanation, is just another movement of mind. Instead, let’s make this lighter and simpler.

Don’t analyze. Don’t search for a conclusion. Just *look*—many times, for short moments. What *actually* shows up as “I” before any thoughts about it?

You mention those “awake moments” where something shifts—good. Right there, just as the sense of openness and relief appears, is there actually an “I” that gets liberated? Or is it just a sensation, an experience arising on its own?

Also, notice: when you look *after* the shift, the “I” can’t be found. Beautiful. Is it ever truly there, or is it only assumed in hindsight?

Let go of the effort. The shift happens on its own, doesn’t it? So instead of trying to make something happen, just stay curious—many short glimpses, no pressure. Look, notice, and let it be simple.

You’re right where you need to be.

Let me know what you find.

[Elad]

Hey Geza,

Beautiful noticing. No self found, just activities appearing—seeing, hearing, feeling, thinking. Including habitual identification. Exactly.

Now, that "shift"—openness, spaciousness, relief. Is the shift something new happening— or is it something not happening?
Like habitual lostness in thoughts for a moment not happening?

And the thought—"Where is the self, after all, if I can't see it anywhere?"— yes, look there. Where indeed? If it's not in direct experience, was it ever real?

Drop into that openness, without trying to hold on or make it into something long or enduring, without grabbing for the next explanation. What happens?

[NoUserFound]

Thanks for these beautiful pointers🙏

Now, that "shift"—openness, spaciousness, relief. Is the shift something new happening— or is it something not happening? Like habitual lostness in thoughts for a moment not happening?

Exactly as you says: it’s the habitual lostness not happening. But only for a moment.
What is also noticed is that “this” (the content of the shift) is actually always here (available) and always was but it has been unnoticed (in a way, it has always been in obvious sight).

And the thought—"Where is the self, after all, if I can't see it anywhere?"— yes, look there. Where indeed? If it's not in direct experience, was it ever real?

The Mind gets triggered when reading this question. What comes up is that only the mind/self can assess and answer if something is “real or not”, but the mind is getting more and more disarmed here, so I’m not sure who could answer this question. No self is seen but saying it out that self was never real sounds “self-ish”, if that makes any sense.

Drop into that openness, without trying to hold on or make it into something long or enduring, without grabbing for the next explanation. What happens?

2 things come up:
-a thought: the self, after all, did expect to survive LU....however there seems to be no space left for “me” in “this”.
-a subtle realization that “this” stays/continuous in an ordinary way. A sense that the habitual lostness comes and goes but “this” stays the same.

Hey Geza,

Beautiful noticing. No self found, just activities appearing—seeing, hearing, feeling, thinking. Including habitual identification. Exactly.

Now, that "shift"—openness, spaciousness, relief. Is the shift something new happening— or is it something not happening?
Like habitual lostness in thoughts for a moment not happening?

And the thought—"Where is the self, after all, if I can't see it anywhere?"— yes, look there. Where indeed? If it's not in direct experience, was it ever real?

Drop into that openness, without trying to hold on or make it into something long or enduring, without grabbing for the next explanation. What happens?

[Elad]

Hey Geza,

Beautiful clarity here. You see it: the shift isn’t something new, it’s simply the habitual lostness not happening. And more than that—you’ve already noticed that this has always been here, just overlooked. That’s the whole thing, right there.

Now, that hesitation -saying “the self was never real” feels “self-ish.” Notice how sneaky that is. What is worried about sounding self-ish? What is it protecting? There is no self to be selfish or selfless—there is just what is unfolding. Saying it out loud doesn’t create or destroy anything. It only acknowledges what is already seen.

And that thought “the self expected to survive LU.” What self? Look closely. Is there something real that could survive or not survive, or just a set of assumptions and habits that are now being seen for what they are? Only clarity increasing. Nothing real is being lost—only confusion. And the compass here? That orientation to direct experience, to what is actually there. Ordinary. Always.

Stay with that. Let the mind resist, let thoughts try to negotiate— none of that changes what’s already obvious. What happens if you trust this clarity?

With you,

[NoUserFound]

Thanks, Elad🙏

Thoughts/parts negotiate with high intensity (IFS vibes), each competing to be believed as the ultimate truth. Sneaky indeed. This can go on for a shorter or longer time. But then there's a shift, and they're seen for what they are: stories, beliefs. All of them.

Then a wish arises: "This" could be stabilised, and "that would mean no (or less) suffering".These thoughts are believed, and then there’s suffering. Then, there's noticing of these thoughts and freedom in that moment.

But then it all starts again. And again. For now, it seems like a never-ending cycle of beliefs and hope for stability… and the seeing of that.

Another thought comes: maybe this whole thing is a moment-to-moment kind of job (?). But then that thought is also seen...
Nothing stays, sticks, or stabilises.

And after all this whirl - when there's more trust- there’s a subtle sense of softening, a kind of gentleness. As if all of this is somehow fine (neutral in a good way) as it is: the confusion, the negotiation, all of it.
This softening is very subtle and ordinary.

And then... all of the above repeats

/Geza

Hey Geza,

Beautiful clarity here. You see it: the shift isn’t something new, it’s simply the habitual lostness not happening. And more than that—you’ve already noticed that this has always been here, just overlooked. That’s the whole thing, right there.

Now, that hesitation -saying “the self was never real” feels “self-ish.” Notice how sneaky that is. What is worried about sounding self-ish? What is it protecting? There is no self to be selfish or selfless—there is just what is unfolding. Saying it out loud doesn’t create or destroy anything. It only acknowledges what is already seen.

And that thought “the self expected to survive LU.” What self? Look closely. Is there something real that could survive or not survive, or just a set of assumptions and habits that are now being seen for what they are? Only clarity increasing. Nothing real is being lost—only confusion. And the compass here? That orientation to direct experience, to what is actually there. Ordinary. Always.

Stay with that. Let the mind resist, let thoughts try to negotiate— none of that changes what’s already obvious. What happens if you trust this clarity?

With you,

[Elad]

This text is a gem of clarity.

You’re seeing the cycle play out in real-time—belief, identification, suffering, noticing, release, and then the loop begins again. And in seeing this, it is already unraveling.

Yes, this pattern must replay and be seen—until it doesn’t. There is no shortcut, no way to force stability. Even resisteace must persist when it persists until it doesn't. Each time it is seen, its grip weakens. And even the wish for stability is just another arising, another thought seen for what it is.

Now, let’s look deeper:


Exercise for Today: Watching the Moment of Identification

Since you already recognize the cycle, let’s refine the seeing:

Watch for the exact moment when a thought shifts from “just appearing” to being believed.

When does it move from being a thought to being "your reality"?
Is there a chooser of this moment, or does it just happen?
What happens right before identification?

Is there tension, contraction, a pull?
If you catch this moment, can you simply pause and stay with the energy, without believing the thought?
What happens if you do nothing?

Not pushing away the thoughts.
Not trying to stabilize anything.
Just sitting in the raw, unresolved movement of mind—without landing anywhere.

And then return to: Is there any belief in a separate self, doer, controller, chooser left? Or is there just this flow of appearing and disappearing—without an owner?

Let this inquiry simmer throughout the day. No rush, no end goal—just the unfolding clarity of what is already seen.

[NoUserFound]

Hey Elad, Thank you!

This last pointer triggered some resistance. The story was that it’s a too complicated exercise, and it’s too hard. But then those thoughts were seen, and so there was a sense of “dropping back” and ease.

-It was noticed that This is actually already stable on its own, so there’s nothing to stabilise. There’s nothing to do to reach stability. A label comes up: “non-doing.” However, it is possible to get distracted (?) from the stability. Am I completely off on this one?

– I’m very surprised by this, but it seems like most of the time things are naturally allowed to unfold/happen (I thought previously that most of the time there was suffering). What I noticed today is that there were fewer moments in the day that were resistance-filled than moments where life was unfolding naturally.

When does it move from being a thought to being "your reality"? Is there a chooser of this moment, or does it just happen? What happens right before identification? Is there tension, contraction, a pull? If you catch this moment, can you simply pause and stay with the energy, without believing the thought?
What happens if you do nothing?



-Most thoughts flow naturally, and only relatively few are met with tension or resistance. I don’t see anyone deciding or controlling which thought is met with tension, or when that tension shows up.

-In some cases, the tension was seen quickly. The experience is that attention captures the tension, the thought is seen for what it is (leaving it at that: no judgment, just staying with the energy), and then the tension disappears. There’s flow and ease.

-If a belief or tension isn’t caught in time, then at some point there’s a sense that the tension fills out all of awareness (it becomes my reality). The original neutral thought is forgotten, and now there’s a new belief: that this tension must go away in order to achieve peace.
I’m not exactly sure when this shift happens - today I experienced that sometimes it was caught “in time,” and sometimes too late. But I also noticed that with careful attention, it was easier to catch it.

And then the return to: Is there any belief in a separate self, doer, controller, chooser left? Or is there just this flow of appearing and disappearing—without an owner?

I don’t see any self, just the flow. Though an old belief is seen: the expectation that not finding a self would come with a certain exhilarating feeling and a strong confidence in this knowing.

/Geza

This text is a gem of clarity.

You’re seeing the cycle play out in real-time—belief, identification, suffering, noticing, release, and then the loop begins again. And in seeing this, it is already unraveling.

Yes, this pattern must replay and be seen—until it doesn’t. There is no shortcut, no way to force stability. Even resisteace must persist when it persists until it doesn't. Each time it is seen, its grip weakens. And even the wish for stability is just another arising, another thought seen for what it is.

Now, let’s look deeper:


Exercise for Today: Watching the Moment of Identification

Since you already recognize the cycle, let’s refine the seeing:

Watch for the exact moment when a thought shifts from “just appearing” to being believed.

When does it move from being a thought to being "your reality"?
Is there a chooser of this moment, or does it just happen?
What happens right before identification?

Is there tension, contraction, a pull?
If you catch this moment, can you simply pause and stay with the energy, without believing the thought?
What happens if you do nothing?

Not pushing away the thoughts.
Not trying to stabilize anything.
Just sitting in the raw, unresolved movement of mind—without landing anywhere.

And then return to: Is there any belief in a separate self, doer, controller, chooser left? Or is there just this flow of appearing and disappearing—without an owner?

Let this inquiry simmer throughout the day. No rush, no end goal—just the unfolding clarity of what is already seen.

[Elad]

Geza, this is spot on.

The realization that stability/presence/the mystery is already present and does not need maintaining is key.

The shift from suffering being the norm to ease being predominant is seeing things as they are, without the old filtering mechanism running as strongly. When resistance and distraction does show up, can it be seen as just another movement within the same flow?

For the lingering belief that seeing through self should feel exhilarating or come with strong confidence: Try sitting quietly and watching the expectation itself. See if it’s any different from any other passing thought. Does it have any more reality than the assumption that the next meal should taste a certain way?

And as importantly: Look at the assumption that THIS is not exhilerating and does not have a "confident clarity" to it. Is that actually the truth of THIS? Or is it a subtle belief that is being identified with? Old pattern(s) being believed to be the truth, rather then just thoughts.

[NoUserFound]

Thank you🙏

The shift from suffering being the norm to ease being predominant is seeing things as they are, without the old filtering mechanism running as strongly. When resistance and distraction does show up, can it be seen as just another movement within the same flow?

Yes, resistance and distraction can be seen as just another movement (this is still such a big surprise to experience!) .
It seems that with such openness and curiosity, it actually doesn’t matter whether there has been distraction or not since no one/self got distracted.

For the lingering belief that seeing through self should feel exhilarating or come with strong confidence: Try sitting quietly and watching the expectation itself. See if it’s any different from any other passing thought. Does it have any more reality than the assumption that the next meal should taste a certain way?

It’s just another thought with no added “reality.”
And another “hidden” part of this belief is also recognised: the expectation was that “I” would have more confidence or clarity after seeing through the self…

And as importantly: Look at the assumption that THIS is not exhilerating and does not have a "confident clarity" to it. Is that actually the truth of THIS? Or is it a subtle belief that is being identified with? Old pattern(s) being believed to be the truth, rather then just thoughts.

-This pointer reminds me of a few days ago, when it felt “selfish” to see that there was never a self. I’m getting the same vibes now about seeing of the clarity and exhilaration of THIS.

-Now it’s seen that THIS already has a natural, confident clarity. What happens, though, is that this clarity is sometimes not recognised due to distraction.

-It’s also seen that THIS has no “boundaries,” so none of the thoughts can quite describe it. They just get seen through, so nothing can capture This.

/Geza

Geza, this is spot on.

The realization that stability/presence/the mystery is already present and does not need maintaining is key.

The shift from suffering being the norm to ease being predominant is seeing things as they are, without the old filtering mechanism running as strongly. When resistance and distraction does show up, can it be seen as just another movement within the same flow?

For the lingering belief that seeing through self should feel exhilarating or come with strong confidence: Try sitting quietly and watching the expectation itself. See if it’s any different from any other passing thought. Does it have any more reality than the assumption that the next meal should taste a certain way?

And as importantly: Look at the assumption that THIS is not exhilerating and does not have a "confident clarity" to it. Is that actually the truth of THIS? Or is it a subtle belief that is being identified with? Old pattern(s) being believed to be the truth, rather then just thoughts.

[Elad]

Beautiful.

For the next day notice how whatever is happening just happens by itself and whatever is happening IS the expression of clarity now, IS the doorway to clarity and freedom NOW.

Here and there, playfully, when you feel like it, invoke the sentence "there is no separate self (alternate with the words: doer, chooser, responsible one, experiencer), there never was and never will be" and just see what happens. Write me about it.

[NoUserFound]

Hey Elad,
Thanks!

For the next day notice how whatever is happening just happens by itself and whatever is happening IS the expression of clarity now, IS the doorway to clarity and freedom NOW.

This resonates! It’s noticed that what’s happening is the expression of clarity. It’s also noticed that this clarity is already here as pure as it gets. Meanwhile, a sense of abundance arises (a sense I’ve never felt before). And there’s a sense that a filter is slowly letting through more and more details of reality.

And no effort is needed (for clarity) — it’s already in there, in the now. Freedom is there as well. However, confusion, resistance, and trying make it less apparent.

It’s also noticed that no self is needed for the experience of clarity or freedom. It actually looks like that the self is in the way of this freedom…

Here and there, playfully, when you feel like it, invoke the sentence "there is no separate self (alternate with the words: doer, chooser, responsible one, experiencer), there never was and never will be" and just see what happens. Write me about it.

A sense of relief and ease is coming up. A sense of getting from tiny to expanded.

/Geza

Beautiful.

For the next day notice how whatever is happening just happens by itself and whatever is happening IS the expression of clarity now, IS the doorway to clarity and freedom NOW.

Here and there, playfully, when you feel like it, invoke the sentence "there is no separate self (alternate with the words: doer, chooser, responsible one, experiencer), there never was and never will be" and just see what happens. Write me about it.

[Elad]

Beautiful Geza!

It’s also noticed that no self is needed for the experience of clarity or freedom.

Yes!

It actually looks like that the self is in the way of this freedom…

What self? Is there actually a self that gets in the way? Or what does the word refer to? What is actually there, getting in the way, when it seems like something is getting in the way?


💗