Postby Ben2 » Sat Apr 09, 2016 3:30 pm
Good evening Kay
1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form?
Was there ever?
No. There never was an there never will be. It can't be found anywhere, not in anyone or anything.
2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience.
Describe it fully as you see it now.
It starts when we are young, we are taught to perceive a separate self by people who all perceive a separate self. A world run by "selves" for "selves", but it's all an illusion. Corporate entities and people in power and people who we look up to who themselves perceive a "self", then manipulate and reinforce other "selves" so they can benefit their "selves". But it's not there! It never was!
It's a form of programming, where due to repetition and a clever "trick of the mind", we associate the true experience of reality, which is sensation, sound, thought and colour, with a psychological "story" about a separate "I" entity. Our parents, friends, siblings, teachers, media, everything we look up to when we are young, all constantly reiterate and reinforce to us that there is a "me" inside that makes decisions and is separate.
3) How does it feel to see this?
What is the difference from before you started this dialogue?
Please report from the past few days.
For me when I first saw it it was really difficult. I had tonnes of anxiety, some panic attacks, cold and hot flushes, couldn't eat or sleep, it really just affected the body in some hard and scary ways. I'm not sure why, all I know is that I had a very unhappy and "heavy" self, that I was really attached to. When I saw it and the illusion was seen through, the body was "released" from this extraordinary burden, and was trying to figure out how to regulate itself with a new way of being.
But all the negative side effects are gone now, I am calm, calmer than I've ever been. Peace is everywhere and everything. Love, connection, presence, care, space, it's all easy and effortless. A truly indescribable gift when the "self" has been seen through. It's just the natural state of being a human being.
4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?
It was really way at the start, I just had this huge, powerful intent behind me, thinking "why are all these people waking up and I've been working on this for years and I"m getting no where!" And I just kept thinking and thinking and trying to see. Suddenly, I was lying down, I saw clearly that my "unhappy childhood" was just a story that I used to enhance this illusions of self. Then that was it, it was gone and it was gone forever. The next week was very hard, one of the hardest I've been through, but more worth it than anything when it finally calmed down to how things are now.
5) Describe decision, intention, free will, choice and control.
What makes things happen? How does it work?
What are you responsible for?
Give examples from experience.
Decision, intention, free will, choice and control. They are all mental concepts. They are all used for the same thing, used to reinforce this illusiory sense of self that everyone has. There is no inside person or self that makes decisions, has intention, free will, choice or control of anything.
Nothing makes things happen, things just are. Anything that says something makes something happen is just a story. I am responsible for nothing because there is no "I" or "me". "I am" reality, I am a seamless and non-separate part of what actually is. No one drives my car, no one types on my computer. I am just the actual experience of reality, sensation and colour.
6) Anything to add?
Thank you for guiding me through the most incredible gift anyone could receive, I am eternally grateful for all you've done and for this website. I would love to learn about what's required to become a guide if that something that's possible. I owe you one Kay! :P
With love and gratitude
Ben
"Truth is infinitely simple, delusion is infinitely complex."
