The Gate

Good stuff,


Keeping this Sam Harris video in mind, name instances where you do have choice or control.

Thanks,

Kevin

Hi Kevin

Keeping this Sam Harris video in mind, name instances where you do have choice or control.

I've just watched the Sam Harris video again and found it really helpful that he often talks about causality and the unfolding of whole processes from prior events. How choice arises from the wilderness of prior causes, how choice is part of a stream of consciousness.

Keeping that in mind when I look I can't pin down a stand alone moment where I have choice or control.

Thanks.

Blackbird

Hi Kevin

I'm not feeling so intense about looking at present, almost like a relaxing into accepting that life is just flowing and unfolding from previous events. That choices are just happening without any I/me in control and they are just part of a stream of causality - as Sam Harris says.

Thanks

Blackbird

Hi Kevin

I'm posting because you asked me to every day.

I've been busy carrying on with life and keep coming back to thinking about the video, still feeling quite relaxed about it and accepting of choices just happening/unfolding.

Haven't go much more to add but wondering if you are supposed to be replying to each post, before I post back?

Thanks.

Blackbird

Blackbird,
My humble apologies.
I was unexpectedly away from the computer for a few days.
It sounds as though you are comfortable with the recognition that there is no self as a controller.
I think you are ready for the round up questions.
Would you like to take another shot at them?

Best,
Kevin

Hi Kevin

That's okay about not replying.

I am feeling more comfortable so I'll have a go at the questions again when you send them.

Thanks.

With Kindness

Blackbird

Hi Blackbird,

Good stuff, you sound more at ease.

Here are the questions again:

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

5) Describe decision, intention, free will, choice and control. What makes things happen? How does it work? What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience.

6) Anything to add?

Namaste,
Kevin

Hi Kevin

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

No I can't find a separate self or me when I look closely. If it's not here now, it never was.

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

It's a story or an illusion of there being a 'me' in control of the flow of this unique life. It started with believing I had a stand alone identity through the label of a name and being categorised by gender, race, family, country of birth, how well I did at school. It grew through seeking 'self' fulfillment through relationships, creating a family, working, striving for achievements and accumulating material assets. Believing for years that there was a stand alone 'I' at the centre in control of decision making and the direction of my life. There was seeing that materialism and relationships, although offering comfort and close companionship, didn't create ultimate fulfillment. There have been years of personal seeking, self healing, self development work and following a Buddhist path which have all been incredibly enriching in 'my' spiritual development and unfolding. I have had many experiences when the sense of self has dropped away in meditation, nature, deep conversations with others, reflecting, but that strongly ingrained habit of selfing has kept returning though deeply held beliefs and conditioning that seem to be reinforced in society at every level.

3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

I've known these things conceptually off and on for a while, they are in the Buddhist teachings that I follow and are an area that I've been very interested in for a few years. The difference has been coming back to really looking at the illusion over and over in a focused way though this dialogue/guidance and direct pointing at actual experience. Using the questions when I'm going about my ordinary life as tools to break through and really see through the illusion.

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

It would have to be going back and watching Sam Harris video again - and I will keep going back and watching. How he explains the links between our minds and causality and how every moment is inherited/unfolding from previous moments. How there is no authorship of free will and we're no more in control of the present structure/state of our minds as we are of our height. That was a great one.

It was also when we started exploring how choice happens and I really saw how choice is not a stand alone moment in time, it is a reaction to external and internal stimuli and a continuous unfolding from moments past.

5) Describe decision, intention, free will, choice and control. What makes things happen? How does it work? What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience.

This I'm still finding a bit difficult to describe intellectually. Some of the answers I think I've included above with the help of Sam Harris and probably you. Decision, intention and choice seem similar in that they are just happening as a result of reactions to inner and outer stimuli and also arising out of prior moments, experiences and often I guess the story/illusion of me projecting into the future. If we take away the story then they are all just simply unfolding experiences happening. Free will and control seem closely linked in that we think we have them both but when I look closely at my experience, especially the constant cascade of thoughts and emotions, there is no centre in control and no free will to have/hold. Sensations, emotions, thinking are all processes happening, just like body processes that are carrying on all the time without any me controlling them. Easy examples would be breathing, sleeping, every unconscious movement, action or process that keeps this life living. There's still a little mystery for me around intention but when I look closely I do keep seeing that this is also a process unfolding from previous moments, experiences, there is no single stand alone moment of intention without some prior condition, happening/arising/ceasing.

6) Anything to add?[/quote]

It does feel quite ordinary but also integrating and freeing at the same time. I will keep exploring teachings that focus on non-selfing - and please keep pointing if you think I haven't quite got it yet!

With Kindness

Blackbird

I'm quite comfortable with where you are.
I want to take this to some of my colleagues for review.

Give them a bit of time, sometimes it takes a while.

Best,
Kevin

Okay, thanks.

Blackbird

Blackbird,

That was quick!
Congratulations! My esteemed colleagues agree with me that you have seen through the illusion of a separate self.
I will direct message you for your Facebook name so we can get you set up with aftercare and other services.
Nicely done!

Kevin

Hi Kevin

That was quick and thank you for your patience and guidance.

I really appreciate the opportunity for following up with aftercare - I think it's very important.

But can I send a personal message to you about the facebook page and if so how do I do that?

Thanks.

With Kindness

Blackbird

Sent you a PM.
You should be able to see it at this link.


Best,

Kevin