The Gate

Rali,

I've been working with your last post each day this past weekend and had my responses typed up as I went. However, I think I'm going to have to end our session so someone who is waiting can be apart. I'm not sure why, but I keep getting held back on trying to see and look. Like I'm talking to see the point. And then I try to be aware of that and notice the sensation of tension in my body and look for actual experience. I'm just becoming convinced that I'm not fully ready to let myself go into this. But I'm sure throughout every day I'll be attending to direct experience and trying to see/look. Thank you for your patience and time and effort in trying to guide me towards looking at what is. I appreciate it.

Gaige

Hi Gaige

I've been working with your last post each day this past weekend and had my responses typed up as I went. However, I think I'm going to have to end our session so someone who is waiting can be apart.

I’m sorry to hear that! Sometimes, it’s simply about readiness. Please, when (not if) you feel ready, just drop a line and we can start a fresh, not necessarily with me if you prefer. Sometimes, it’s just a mismatch of language (conditioning)

I'm not sure why, but I keep getting held back on trying to see and look. Like I'm talking to see the point. And then I try to be aware of that and notice the sensation of tension in my body and look for actual experience.

If you feel tension when trying to look at what is, you are trying too hard. Looking is a matter of noticing what is already here, not inventing or imagining something that needs a huge amount of energy to sustain. Stop trying, just have a look. Ironically, trying to see is imagining or presupposing that you do not see— the opposite of looking at what is here already, in this very moment, right now. Of course, you already see what is here now. No effort is required: what you see is undeniable. This action is plain, simple, and ordinary. It is just "covered" by thoughts about not seeing. Anyway, I’m not trying to convince you, just clarifying.
Looking forward to hearing from you someday!

All the best!
Love
Rali