The Gate

Hi again,
I have one more question for you from another guide:

He agrees with your statement that you can't be responsible for anything because the I is a concept. But can you give an an explanation of what responsibility actually is?

Thanks again!
-Todd

Hi Sri!
Really glad you could make the meeting today. I thought your share about Free Will was spot on!

Did you see my last couple of posts about the follow-up questions?
When you get a chance, it would be great to wrap this up so you can get involved with more aftercare groups.

And like I mentioned in the meeting, once you're through the Gate it would be wonderful to have you join the Fetter Exploration group I'm trying to put together.

But first things first. We need to get you confirmed. :-)

Are you having any doubts? Any new problems arising?

Once you get me your follow-up answers, I'll pass them on to the other guides.

Thanks, and have a great night!
-Todd

Hello Todd,

Thanks. Sorry about the delay because I missed my email notifications.

Yeah. It was an interesting meeting about a topic everyone struggles with : Free will and Control.

But can you give an an explanation of what responsibility actually is?

Responsibility is executing the tasks expected of that individual or more precisely the body mind organism. These expectations can emerge from the individual mind or conditioning itself or can be imposed by close ones, family members, relatives or society at large.

For example, a mother taking care of her child, a worker executing his or her assigned tasks at office etc.

It may feel like "I am doing this task" but since I is an illusion , tasks themselves happen by the body mind organism without any control.

Thanks,
Srikanth

Hello Todd,

Pls see below.

Give examples from the last few days - What is different before you came to LU and now?

Is the attitude towards other people different? Can you give an example?

Some things I am noticing the past few days is a kind of peace and relaxation. Also noticing synchronicity in some areas where things happen flawlessly and easily where it used to be tricky before. One example I am getting the best parking spots whenever I go to zoo or concerts or shopping, never used to happen before. Also some good stuff happening for my family too like daughter getting her first summer internship at the same office as mine. I was anxious before I came to LU constantly asking the question "Why I am not enlightened yet" or " Why am I not awake yet" etc but now I know it's completely beyond control when it happens but one can work towards that.

Attitude towards other people is still a work in progress, should i consider them as fellow human beings (or) they are just appearances in the life without a self (or) are they units or sock puppets walking around empty etc. I haven't yet settled on a consistent way of viewing them.

Thanks,
Srikanth

Hi, Sri!
Sorry that you were missing the notifications, but thanks for getting right to these.

A couple of my own little follow-ups on the follow-ups. ;-)

Also noticing synchronicity in some areas where things happen flawlessly and easily where it used to be tricky before. One example I am getting the best parking spots whenever I go to zoo or concerts or shopping, never used to happen before. Also some good stuff happening for my family too like daughter getting her first summer internship at the same office as mine.

I've always been a big noticer of synchronicity, and it does feel for some reason like it is often a sign of being "on the right path" in some vague way. However I have no idea whether that actually has anything to do with awakening or not, or if it's purely a fabrication of the mind drawing connections to things and events that aren't really there. :-)

So I would recommend that you appreciate when these things happen, note them if they feel comfortable, definitely respond with gratitude, but don't cling to them or expect them. Because if they suddenly stop happening, it doesn't mean you've suddenly become un-awakened, or that you're regressing in some way. They're just an interesting manifestation of life.

That said, congrats to your daughter for her internship!

Some things I am noticing the past few days is a kind of peace and relaxation... I was anxious before I came to LU constantly asking the question "Why I am not enlightened yet" or " Why am I not awake yet" etc but now I know it's completely beyond control when it happens but one can work towards that.

These are more the sort of changes we're looking for. :-)

Attitude towards other people is still a work in progress, should i consider them as fellow human beings (or) they are just appearances in the life without a self (or) are they units or sock puppets walking around empty etc. I haven't yet settled on a consistent way of viewing them.

This is tricky. I'm not going to suggest anything specific here, except to say that we should stay aware of any views that can lead to a nihilistic, or callous devaluation of anyone. There is a risk when we think of people as empty sock puppets that we'll start responding to them like they aren't worthy of compassion, or that the spiritual ego starts to feel like we're more real or important than they are. (Which is partly why there are so many awakened gurus who have done terrible things to their students over the years.) That said, how you envision other people may continue to change for a while.

More importantly, are your reactions to people or challenging events any different than they were before?
The peace and relaxation are great! Do you feel emotionally/physically different in any other ways?

Thanks again!
Once I get your response I'll submit your new answers for confirmation.
Have a great night!
-Todd

Sorry, one more quick one.

If you were asked to explain why you are not responsible for your choices/actions, without using the logical argument that "since I is an illusion, it can't be in control," what would you say? Can you explain from your personal experience?

I know this is a tricky distinction and we're really splitting hairs here, but we're making sure there's nothing more that needs to be investigated before we wrap up.

Thanks again!
-Todd

Hello Todd,

Thanks for your great insights as always.

You are absolutely right about "not to expect" the synchronicity, I also came to that conclusion recently and mostly notice these things as a fun activity and not take them too seriously. we don't want any letdowns if they suddenly stop happening.

On that comment I made "should I view others as empty sock puppets" , that was meant to be a joke and in jest but I forgot to include the smiley icon. sorry , that was a bad joke anyways, Of course I respect other people immensely and consider them as aspect of the divine life force that we all are.

More importantly, are your reactions to people or challenging events any different than they were before?
The peace and relaxation are great! Do you feel emotionally/physically different in any other ways?

Reactions especially annoying situations with other people or something not going my way, is quite different now. I don't react much at all , I used to swear , curse and suffer inside earlier and ruminate but not anymore. Physically and emotionally there is this place of equanimity I am experiencing from which vantage point , nothing seems to be much of a problem.

If you were asked to explain why you are not responsible for your choices/actions, without using the logical argument that "since I is an illusion, it can't be in control," what would you say? Can you explain from your personal experience?

Sure. The way I look at responsibility is that it is some sort of an inbuilt and imposed conditioning that human race has in order to survive. For example both human babies and animals would not have a good survival rate if their parents did not take care of them when young. In my personal experience I was a second child and as was the culture in India , 2nd born male children are considered as care free and given every leeway and not held responsible for anything. My elder brother was the responsible one . So I grew up as a very irresponsible person and was like that until I got married. Now it's different of course wife always imposes responsibility :). But looking back i did love those days when I was free or felt free and did not feel like I missed anything or would have done anything differently. It was a lot of fun.

Hope to hear from you.

Regards,
Srikanth

Hi Sri!

Great to hear back from you! Thanks for the updates!

Excellent that you so quickly saw through the potential pitfalls of putting too much emphasis on external signs on your own. Glad to hear it!

Of course I respect other people immensely and consider them as aspect of the divine life force that we all are.

Hahaha! I figured you were joking, but because some people really do fall to the extremes like that, I felt like it would be irresponsible of me to not at least acknowledge it. :-) I'm not worried about you at this point!

Reactions especially annoying situations with other people or something not going my way, is quite different now. I don't react much at all , I used to swear , curse and suffer inside earlier and ruminate but not anymore. Physically and emotionally there is this place of equanimity I am experiencing from which vantage point , nothing seems to be much of a problem.

This sounds like exactly the sort of thing indicative of awakening! Very happy to hear it for you! What a relief to live with less reactivity, right?

Wow! Thanks for sharing that about your upbringing. I wasn't aware of that difference in roles based on birth order! That's fascinating. It must have been a big change having to face the responsibilities of adulthood after a childhood with such freedom.

Okay, I'll submit your new answers and see if anyone has any further questions for you!
Thanks again, and have a great night!
-Todd

Regards,
Srikanth

Good morning!

I have one more follow-up question for you from another guide.

In one of your answers you said "I looked directly I could not find a self."
How would you describe this (looking and not finding a self) to someone who has never heard of this? Can you please describe this seeing?

Thanks again, and have a great day!
-Todd

Hello Todd,

Thanks for the question.

How would you describe this (looking and not finding a self) to someone who has never heard of this? Can you please describe this seeing?

Here is how I would describe this process to someone new.

1. Sitting in any comfortable position, gently close your eyes.
2. Using awareness as a torch light, focus it on your feet.
3. Check for sensations and look directly for a personal self, I or me in the feet.
4. Remember, we are not looking for a body part , sensation or mind or thoughts, we are looking for a distinctly identifiable entity called self, I or me that we can locate in our awareness.
5. If you cannot find it in feet, move upwards to Calf, then Knees, then lower back , stomach, upper back, heart, neck, face and mind.
6. see if you can directly locate the self / me / I clearly anywhere in the body.
7. whatever your experience is , use it for your insight about the self.
8. Repeat this process atleast 3 to 4 times a day for a week.
9. Don't overthink this or use thoughts to justify or assume something is there. we need direct evidence in our awareness.

Thanks,
Srikanth

Congratulations, Sri! The other guides have no more questions for you. Welcome to the "other side" of the Gateless Gate! ;-)

The admin will change your name from green to blue on the forum, and you will have access to aftercare pages on here.
You will also be invited to the Unleashed Facebook group.

Please keep in touch and let me know if anything comes up for you in your ongoing journey of awakening. This is a HUGE step, but it is, as you know, only the first.

Again, I will be organizing a group for people looking to continue exploring the Fetters, and I would be thrilled to have you join! You can find my post about it on the Unleashed group.

I'm still here for you if you need anything, or if any questions arise at any point.

It's been an absolute pleasure working with you, and I hope to continue seeing you in all of our various meetings.

Well done!
-Todd

Hi Todd,

Thanks for everything. It was great to have someone of your caliber and experience guiding me. I am very much interested in working towards the other fetters as well. Can you pls include me when you start those activities,

Thanks once again.

Regards
Sri