idontknowwhattosay

[mayank6576]

Hey Vince,

Went through your reply Vince.
Will be travelling through the weekend, won't be able to reply back till Monday.
Its the festival of colours ( Holi ) here in India.

See you on Monday Vince.

Regards,
Mayank

[mayank6576]

Hey Vince,
Hope you had a good relaxing weekend

Whatever THIS is, is exactly the way it is.
I didn't have to like it. THIS might be shitty feelings of doubt, of amazing feelings of love. Whatever it is THIS. IT.

This is absolutely true. Its always just THIS, nothing else, no matter how much the thoughts want to change it or see it the way they want to, it doesn't change. Nothing ever lasts, everything from a feeling, a situation ( good or bad ), a sensation in the body ( good or bad ), everything comes and passes on its own, there can just be experiencing of all these. The mind ( thoughts ) just wants to grab on to the experience and attach it to a story, which is not true, its all made up. I am left with a feeling of awe, what I was chasing was already here, its so easy and simple yet so delicate, its easy to get lost. Theres no magic to it, whatever descriptions I have read or heard or watched from spiritual guides or so called enlightened people, was what I was expecting somewhere. Probably the best quote I ever came across is KNOW YOURSELF. If I was given a chance to change it it'd be KNOW YOURSELF TO SEE THERES NO YOU ANYWHERE. ME is not here, its nowhere. It never was.

..and can you laugh at that when you recognize that you forgot?

Haha

Can you imagine the healing that this promotes?

It's cleansing :)

..and i for you Mayank. i feel like i have made a friend for life. You have helped me to get back in touch with the wonder of waking up.
Oh, and while you are feeling gratitude and appreciation, i would like to invite you to (in time) pay it forward and with the help of a mentor, to become a guide here for the many seekers that knock at this door.
Of course this will bring up doubt stories for you, but... (you know what to do)

I would love to help people see their illusion and break free. I've come to realise that its the only thing to do, to live with life.

I am sorry to hear about your mother.
Why?

Cause I was told once thats it's the only acceptable response to such information. Just like I was told or learned to respond to everything....

Can you see that there is a whole book, with many chapters that describe Mayank. 27 years of constantly adding and refining details about this character.
Can you see that responding to what is written in this book is what creates the impression of an identity? That the shaping of experience is the result of conditioned reactions to these details?
Is it possible to rewrite this book with much more adaptable stories?
..and can we respond to those stories lightly? Not slavishly, but ever ready to improve on what is there?

I now understand and see how this digital book works and how fast it is in its execution. I am not the character in the narrative I am the author of this book, if that makes sense. I've for sure learned the skill to respond to these written stories, and see them just as stories running like a continuous reel full of crazy thoughts and imagination. This book is something that needs to be worked on very delicately.

Peace Vince :)
Love
Mayank

[vinceschubert]

Good morning Mayank,

Hope you had a good relaxing weekend

Thankyou. i hope yours was not quite the usual.

and attach it to a story, which is not true, its all made up.

Yes, it is a creation, but true (or not)?
i have seen that "true" is subjective, so is it true that a story is happening? i know that you are referring to the content of a story, so is that an accurate depiction of circumstances? It may or may not be.
We are at the point where we make a judgment about the usefulness of the story. True or not doesn't matter. How useful is it?
..but i get your point.

I am left with a feeling of awe, what I was chasing was already here,

Ah yes. Beautiful isn't it.

its so easy and simple yet so delicate, its easy to get lost.

..and easy to find again. A simple move to focus on any sensation can reveal it.

I would love to help people see their illusions and break free.

Doing this helps me stay focused and continue discovering.

I am not the character in the narrative I am the author of this book,

Be careful with this one. i know what you mean, but you are on the edge of identifying with something again.
The book gets authored. ..or authoring happens. There is no actual identity to do this, just as there is no actual identity authoring Mayank.

This book is something that needs to be worked on very delicately.

Yes, that never ends (i imagine) but "worked on" isn't quite right either. Hmm, or rather when watching happens, then 'working on' is also happening.
When you have answered those final questions and other guides concur that you have seen through some illusions the color of your name will change (to red) At this point you can request a mentor and start helping seekers at the gate find a way through. You will continue working with your mentor for as long as you like.
Are you ready for those questions (again) ?

with love & joy

vince

[mayank6576]

Hey Vince,

The weekend was colourful :)
I couldn't write back to you for the past few days.

Are you ready for those questions (again) ?

yes I am

Regards,
Mayank

[vinceschubert]

Good day Mayank, (busy here too) Ok, here they are. Don't refer to your previous answers. Use your current experiencing as reference.
1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form?
Was there ever?

2) Share in your own words what the illusion of separate self is and how it shows up in experience. Also, through your inquiry, what is different now?

3) How does it feel to see this?
What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over; made you look?

5) a) Describe decision, intention, free will, choice and control. What makes things happen? How does it work?
Give examples from your own recent experiences to how things happen and how things work.

b) What are you responsible for? Give examples from your own recent experiences to how this works.

6) Anything to add?

[mayank6576]

Hey Vince,

Hope you are doing well.
I've been sick, caught the virus. I am better now.

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form?
Was there ever?

Me cannot be found in any shape or form here right now, it does not exist here, it never did, it cannot.

2) Share in your own words what the illusion of separate self is and how it shows up in experience. Also, through your inquiry, what is different now?

The illusion of a self or a doer emerges in the experience in the form of thoughts. It wants to own the experience and make some meaning or conclusions out of everything. Just like experience of sights , sounds , taste, there are thoughts which make up the illusion of a separate self. Inquiry of this self revealed that this ME or I is not here in the present moment, it tries to be with background voices, trying to narrate what is happening or why or how. This inquiry lead me to realise that this entity I or Mayank is bunch of beliefs and patterns, and they have a habit to hinder the EXPERIENCE and want to perceive reality how they want to or how they are used to.

3) How does it feel to see this?
What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

It feels like I took off the clothes that I was wearing since the beginning. The difference is in the perspective of how I see and look at things. The constant anxiety and cause of suffering is understood, it is still here, but there is less resistance to it. It comes and it goes just like every other thing inside or outside the body, everything emerges and passes, every sensation and feeling and emotion and situation, everything passes away. There can only be experience of it. The I wants to do everything, own and control everything, it even wants to be happy :) and finds sensations that it likes or dislikes and clings or averts to them. Its the nature of I or atleast my I if you know what mean. These behaviour are understood and are more noticable now than ever.

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over; made you look?

The recognition exercise helped a lot i'd say. Though there is no one single thing, the way Vince explained things made it clear than ever.

5) a) Describe decision, intention, free will, choice and control. What makes things happen? How does it work?
Give examples from your own recent experiences to how things happen and how things work.

Decision, intention, free will, choice control all these are just happening, there are millions of possibilities of something happening, one thing leads to another and then another, it is enfolding on its own. The illusion was I am in control of the outcome and situations. Sights sounds breathing walking everything is happening on its own. I can just be a bare witness. Say I am writing this post now on my laptop, maybe because of a thought I had earlier that I need to reply to Vince, whatever the reason may be , the reality of right now is my hands are on the keys i can feel the cold on the palm rest, lights from the screen, sound of the fan and I am typing. It is all just happening here right now and its happening on its own.

b) What are you responsible for? Give examples from your own recent experiences to how this works.

What I am responsible for? Nothing. There is nothing to be responsible for.. Responsibilities come under consideration when there are expectations from the outcome, based on many factors like mentioned earlier. The outcome happens on its own..

6) Anything to add?

Yes, this realisation is definitely not the end, its more of a beginning of the journey. I really appreciate this effort and the approach that liberation unleashed is providing, and also to all the guides who put so much, so people can see for themselves what the reality actually is.

Much love
Mayank

[vinceschubert]

Hi Mayank, Well i put your answers to the questions to other guides and all agree that you have seen through the illusion of a separate self.
Your (name) color will be changed to blue and you will be invited to a facebook group where you can communicate with others that recognize the actual.
This thread will be archived, but we can continue to communicate through PMs or by email.
If you feel inclined then you can consider guiding others with a mentor. i highly recommend this as it is great for deepening what you had discovered.

much love

vince