The Gate

Hi Kay. Thank you for your private message on fear. I will reply to that one separately and will answer the one you sent prior on thought now.

can a thought be stopped in the middle by going directly to sensation or is that just simply another thought to go to sensation to try and stop thought?

-A THOUGHT CANNOT BE STOPPED IN THE MIDDLE.

Does any thought have any idea what thought came before it or after it? In other words can a thought predict what the next thought will be? Does a thought know what thought came before it?

-A THOUGHT DOESN'T HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT THOUGHT CAME BEFORE IT OR AFTER IT AS IT IS SIMPLY THOUGHT. NO A THOUGHT CANNOT PREDICT WHAT THE NEXT THOUGHT WILL BE. NO A THOUGHT DOESN'T KNOW WHAT THOUGHT CAME BEFORE IT AS IT IS SIMPLY A THOUGHT.

Does thought A "I am cold" know anything about other thoughts or that it is a thought itself? Is thought an aware entity? Is the thought “I am cold” alive and aware of itself or anything else? If you see the thought “I am cold” as a typewritten sentence across the forehead…does the thought itself know anything about being cold? Does the thought itself know that it is a thought?

-THE THOUGHT A 'I AM COLD' DOESN'T KNOW ABOUT OTHER THOUGHTS OR IT IS A THOUGHT ITSELF. THOUGHT IS NOT AN AWARE ENTITY AND IS SIMPLY THOUGHT. THE THOUGHT 'I AM COLD' IS NOT ALIVE, AWARE OF ITSELF OR ANYTHING ELSE AS IT IS SIMPLY A THOUGHT. THE THOUGHT 'I AM COLD' DOESN'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT BEING COLD AS IT IS SIMPLY THOUGHT. THE THOUGHT ITSELF DOESN'T KNOW THAT IT IS A THOUGHT AS IT IS SIMPLY THOUGHT.

Regards Patrick.

Hey Patrick,

I think we will look at fear first, and then continue with the guiding. So you can either respond to the fear exercise here or via PM.

Love, Kay

Hi Kay. I've just responded to fear exersize substituting 'fear' for 'overwhelmed' via PM. I'd have been happy to do it here but thought it may be easier via PM. Thank you. With love Patrick.

Thanks Patrick...I have responded to it :)

Hi Kay. I've been doing a bit of practice on staying with sensation, welcoming it and giving it space. I've also started doing it recently via the Scott Kiloby 'Natural Rest for Addiction' practice I'm studying with friends and I join a Monday evening Zoom group meeting with a Kiloby trained facilitator. I've been a Buddhist for nearly twenty years yet oddly haven't really got the hang of doing it previously or been more conscious of doing it. There seems to have been a bit of a shift towards looking at sensation since looking at Kiloby practice and being guided by yourself. I tried it today walking for the bus stop and waiting at bus stop and on bus on way to work, but I work with learning disabilities and at the moment I find it hard to do at work as often busy especially Fridays and we don't get a break to ourselves. I'd like to sit quietly for an hour in the morning but I haven't managed that amount of time yet and in the evening also and it seems the more practice the better which I'm slowly trying to crank up. Seems to be the opposite of addictive behaviour in constant 'pleasure seeking' and avoiding 'discomfort'. I can experience quite a bit of 'resistance' to it or 'intensity' which can emerge in the form of feeling 'strong energy holding' around my throat but I just allow this to happen when I feel it and it passes. I will keep doing it. Thanks Patrick.

Hi Patrick,

Lovely to hear that you are steadily working with the sensations when they appear and not trying to run from them or do anything with them. It is challenging...but the benefits are great.

Let's continue to look at the idea of fear.

1. So when the sensation labelled as 'fear' appears and if you don’t think about it, do you know that this sensation is something called ‘fear’?
2. Is there any inherent fear in the sensation itself?
3. Go to the sensation at the soles of the feet. Would you label that sensation ‘fear’? Or is it just a neutral, undefined tingling sensation?
4. Now compare the sensation of the soles of the feet – which is just neutral sensation – and the sensation in your chest (labelled ‘fear’)…what is the difference between them?
5. Thought would say one is a little more ‘intense’, but apart from that – any difference?

Kay

1. So when the sensation labelled as 'fear' appears and if you don’t think about it, do you know that this sensation is something called ‘fear’?
2. Is there any inherent fear in the sensation itself?
3. Go to the sensation at the soles of the feet. Would you label that sensation ‘fear’? Or is it just a neutral, undefined tingling sensation?
4. Now compare the sensation of the soles of the feet – which is just neutral sensation – and the sensation in your chest (labelled ‘fear’)…what is the difference between them?
5. Thought would say one is a little more ‘intense’, but apart from that – any difference?

1) When the sensation labelled 'fear' appears and if you don't think about it, you don't know that this sensation is something called 'fear.' That is a thought about the sensation not simply the sensation experience itself.
2) There isn't any inherent fear in the sensation itself, just the sensation. 'Fear' is thought/label.
3) The sensation at the soles of the feet is just sensation experience. 'Fear' or any other term would be a thought/label about the experience, not the sensation experience itself.
4) It's not clear there is any difference. Difference would be a thought about sensation.
5) Again it' not clear there is a difference. Difference would be a thought about sensation.

Thanks Patrick.

Hey Patrick,

1) When the sensation labelled 'fear' appears and if you don't think about it, you don't know that this sensation is something called 'fear.' That is a thought about the sensation not simply the sensation experience itself.
2) There isn't any inherent fear in the sensation itself, just the sensation. 'Fear' is thought/label.
3) The sensation at the soles of the feet is just sensation experience. 'Fear' or any other term would be a thought/label about the experience, not the sensation experience itself.
4) It's not clear there is any difference. Difference would be a thought about sensation.
5) Again it' not clear there is a difference. Difference would be a thought about sensation.

Lovely, Patrick. Is it becoming more obvious that the sensation labelled ‘fear’ is simply a sensation?


I have sent you a PM as well.

Love, Kay

Hi Kay.

Thank you fro new PM exersize which I will do over next few days. I will let you know how I get on.

Love Patrick.

Thanks Patrick :)

Hi Kay.

Sorry for delay in messaging you.

Is it ok if I come back to you on Monday?

Life has taken over a bit this week so far. I've dropped most things except work including cancelling two meetings I attend to to focus on addressing my neighbour who is a drug addict/dealer, schizophrenic and has been very anti-social in a variety of ways for about two years including music on a daily basis and throughout the day. On Tuesday I got three hours sleep with work the next day as I was woken by two associates shouting and banging at 0105 wanting drugs and yesterday it took me about four to five hours to compose an e-mail to Environmental Health that's been on my mind to do for some time. The positive news is a police officer has contacted me and is taking on the case and we met and he' says he's going to sort the situation out, after about two years of it.

I am regaining my energy and time and have just come back round to mediating/looking yesterday and want to do the practice you gave me properly over the weekend and then contact you.

With love Patrick.

Hello Patrick,

You must be feeling acknowledged finally that something is going to be done about your noise problem. Life has a habit of lifing, so get back to me when you can.

Kay

Thank you for your patience Kay.

As well as receiving support my neighbour has been away for several days so it's been a more peaceful environment at home and I now have a couple of days off work and hopefully it continues.

So for past several days I've been looking for an actual link between thought/story that brings up the sensation 'fear/anxiety'.

I varied the thought/story a little and sometimes during a sit with another thought/story that arose.

I noticed things like strong physical resistance around 'throat area' and strong energy around 'head area' and turning to other thoughts/stories or dissipating, but kept bringing it back to original thought/story as you suggested and looking for an actual link. I've been a bit more gentle in approach at times also. In the last sit I've come out of just before writing this message there was more ease staying with the sensation 'around upper chest'.

I cannot find an actual link/connection between thought/story and the sensation 'fear/anxiety'.

The sensation itself doesn't know the thought/story.

With love Patrick.

Hello Patrick,

As well as receiving support my neighbour has been away for several days so it's been a more peaceful environment at home and I now have a couple of days off work and hopefully it continues.

Terrific :)

I noticed things like strong physical resistance around 'throat area' and strong energy around 'head area' and turning to other thoughts/stories or dissipating, but kept bringing it back to original thought/story as you suggested and looking for an actual link. I've been a bit more gentle in approach at times also. In the last sit I've come out of just before writing this message there was more ease staying with the sensation 'around upper chest'.

Nice work, Patrick. I would suggest that you continue to do this as a means to continue becoming comfortable with what thought says are intense, uncomfortable sensations. The more you do this, the less intense and uncomfortable they become. It is also good to see how you react to these sensations. What I mean by that is, is to watch the thoughts and reactions that want to move you away from the sensations, so as not to feel the sensations.

I cannot find an actual link/connection between thought/story and the sensation 'fear/anxiety'.

The sensation itself doesn't know the thought/story.

Great looking and observing.

Labels ‘fear/anxiety’ is AE of thought and not AE of fear or anxiety
Labels ‘intense/uncomfortable’ are AE of thought and not AE of intense or uncomfortable
Sensation labelled as ‘fear/anxiety’ is AE of sensation and not AE of fear/anxiety
Image labelled ‘me/I/body’ is AE of colour and not AE of a ‘me’ who is fearful/anxious.
Thoughts about fear/anxiety and what they are and what they mean and who they are happening to…are AE of thought and not AE of fear/anxiety etc?

What is actually known is labels + sensation + colour + thoughts, however fear/anxiety is not known.

Is this clear now? Being clear does not mean that those sensations or thoughts will never appear again. Or that the story about a 'me' who is feeling anxious will never appear again. Being clear simply means that you have seen what they actually are as opposed to the thought stories about them? And that there is no one found who is actually in fear or anxious.

Another great tool to use is the “blahblahblah” exercise.

What thought tends to do is add “virtual layers” about experience, by adding story about what IS. The more complex the idea, the more “virtual layers” have been added. So what needs to happen is to strip the layers of story away, until all that remains is the bare bones. And, there is way to determine when you have stripped away all the layers that are pure fantasy, and you have only the bare bones left. If you can replace the thought with “blahblahblah” and what it was referring to remains, you know you are down to the bare bones.

So, close your eyes (or leave them open) and bring the story of “I am feeling anxious” to the forefront, and notice the sensation and images that seemingly go hand in hand with that thought.

Now replace the thought “I am I am feeling anxious” with “blahblahblah”. Look at the actual experience, with thought only saying “blahbahblah.” Is there a “I” that is “feeling anxious” without thought saying so?

If yes, that thought is referring to actual experience. That’s a “bare bones” thought, with all additional story layers stripped.

If no, then you know that the thought has added “virtual layers.” It is fantasy, and it isn’t confirmed as actual experience, because what it was saying didn’t remain when the thought was replaced with “blahblahblah.” If what remains, for example is sensation, then all that is confirmed in actual experience is AE of sensation, but can an “I am feeling anxious” be confirmed?

You can do that exercise with any thought that appears to see if a thought is a ‘bare bone’ thought or is a thought that has added ‘virtual layers’ to AE.

Test it out and let me know what you noticed.

Kay

Is this clear now? Being clear does not mean that those sensations or thoughts will never appear again. Or that the story about a 'me' who is feeling anxious will never appear again. Being clear simply means that you have seen what they actually are as opposed to the thought stories about them? And that there is no one found who is actually in fear or anxious.

Hi Kay. this is clear thank you.

I will keep up with the previous practice and will do 'blahblahblah' exersize and come back to you.

With love Patrick.