The Gate

Hi Louise! Some really great answers.
In this next post the questions are really focusing in.

How is it known in actual experience that the voice is "Louise's voice"?
Is is sound, colour, smell, taste, sensation or thought?

Sound, a particular texture of sound that represents 'my voice' and 'familiarity'.

In this case, there is mental sound.
AND there are thoughts about "my voice" and "familiarity".
Is that seen?

There's a thought that I know that particular sound modulation, that I've heard it lots of times before.

Great - a thought about this sound "I've heard it lots of times."

There's the thought that's 'my' voice.

Great. The thought "my voice".

Sensations are subtle but there is a sort of way of holding my body that I associate with Louise, or rather a collection of ways depending on the emotional texture of the moment.

This appears to be a story about sensation.
Sensation is sensation (the experience of sensation)
"Texture", "holding my body" are thoughts about the sensation.
Is that clear?

Is it possible to find a thought about a family member? Yes
Is it possible to see a mental images of that person? Yes
Is it possible to experience the sound of their voice in thought? Faintly, not clearly
Are there sensations that seem to arise with the thoughts about the person?

Yes, depending on how I feel about them I may experience sensations in my body that are a result of feeling warm-hearted, loving or angry, irritated.

There is a mental sound of "Louise's voice".
There is a mental sound of "Louise's relative's voice".
There is a mental image of "Louise's family member".

Is there a mental image of "Father Christmas"?
Is there a mental sound of "Ho ho ho"?

Which is more real?

Louise's voice? The relative's voice? Father Christmas's voice?

The mental image of the relative? A mental images of Louise? A mental images of Father Christmas?

Look at sensation in the left foot.
Where exactly does sensation end and awareness begin? Is it possible to divide the experience into "sensation" and "awareness of" the sensation.

Absolutely not. I can't have sensation without awareness. There is no division that I can detect, they are totally interdepedant. Though can I detect what part of this experience is sensation and what awareness. That makes my head spin. I think my rational mind says absolutely not because the idea of it is impossible. You can't have sensation without awareness of it. Hmm but in practice no I don't think I can find a division or qualities that are respectively sensation and awareness. Will have to keep looking at this one I think.

Great! Keep looking.
But why consult thought? What is the "rational mind"?
Only actual experience will help here.

Is it true that no division can be found in actual experience?

The content of thought is the stories of the characters on the screen. These stories are not "real".
What is "I" in this analogy? Where is "I" found?

The I is in the looking, in the action or process of looking.

There is an "I" Looking?
Have a look for this "I" looking.

Where does colour/image end and the "I" begin?

Look at an object like a cup on the table.
Look at the shadows, the reflections.
What is looking?

SLOWLY LOOK BACK.
What is looking?

Very best wishes

Nina

Morning Nina

Thought I'd post before I get carried away with a busy day!

In this case, there is mental sound.
AND there are thoughts about "my voice" and "familiarity".
Is that seen?

Yes that is seen

This appears to be a story about sensation.
Sensation is sensation (the experience of sensation)
"Texture", "holding my body" are thoughts about the sensation.
Is that clear?

Yes that's clear

There is a mental sound of "Louise's voice".
There is a mental sound of "Louise's relative's voice".
There is a mental image of "Louise's family member".

Is there a mental image of "Father Christmas"? Yes
Is there a mental sound of "Ho ho ho"? Sort of

Which is more real?
Louise's voice? The relative's voice? Father Christmas's voice?
The mental image of the relative? A mental images of Louise? A mental images of Father Christmas?

My first reaction was that the images & voices of the people I know are more real as they are thoughts about tangible people, but in terms of mental images and sounds they are all appearing in thought so none is more real than any other.

Look at sensation in the left foot.
Where exactly does sensation end and awareness begin? Is it possible to divide the experience into "sensation" and "awareness of" the sensation.

Is it true that no division can be found in actual experience?

I've been looking a lot at this and I'm finding it hard to see precisely. Maybe it will help to write it down. What happens is I have a thought to bring attention to the sensations in my left foot. There are some sensations and there is the awareness focusing on those sensations. Awareness can move around - to sensations in parts of my body, to sounds, to thoughts etc. So awareness feels bigger than the the sensations in my left foot. It's only when awareness is in that place that I notice the sensations, if it's somewhere else I may not notice them. In my experience awareness feels like it's partly located in my head. So they might be different things but isn't that a thought? I'm really trying to see in AE if there is a gap. I can't have sensations without awareness of them. Well I can ie when I'm distracted, ie I might suddenly realize I have pain when I hadn't noticed, but until that point even if the pain was there, surely it's only there if you have the awareness to feel it. Thoughts seem to arise non-stop and sometimes I'm more aware of them and sometimes they are faintly going on in the background. So sensation and awareness I dont' think happen independently of each other, but are they different. They feel different, have different qualities. Sensation is sensation - tension, buzzing, heat etc. Other objects ie sounds, sights are also possible to describe precisely. Awareness is.....how to describe?! I don't know how to describe awareness in AE other than a vague broad sense, partly coming from my head but also from all around, just being, not very tangible.....? Any help appreciated please!

There is an "I" Looking?
Have a look for this "I" looking.
Where does colour/image end and the "I" begin?

Look at an object like a cup on the table.
Look at the shadows, the reflections.
What is looking?
SLOWLY LOOK BACK.
What is looking?

I've been looking a lot at this too and again it's a struggle to pinpoint. I don't know what is looking - there is the object in all it's detail - I'm an artist so I look at things a lot and see things in abstract terms ie light, shape etc. The objects are there in my sight line. I can't see my face so there's the wierd experience of falling in to the world, or the world falling in to me, this big hole around my face where there is no boundary between inside and outside. I dont' know who or what is looking. I'm used to saying I am, this Louise in this physical body, and that still makes sense but when I really look that is harder to define. The objects are there and something is seeing them, otherwise they wouldn't be seen.

Thank you Nina, wishing you a very good Spring day and look forward to your responses....I'm struggling a bit at this stage.

Love, Louise x

Hi Louise!

Sorry - I managed to miss your post yesterday and have not had an opportunity to post yet today.

Everything seems to be going very well in your inquiry! Confusion is what happens until it all becomes clear.

Which is more real?
Louise's voice? The relative's voice? Father Christmas's voice?
The mental image of the relative? A mental images of Louise? A mental images of Father Christmas?

My first reaction was that the images & voices of the people I know are more real as they are thoughts about tangible people, but in terms of mental images and sounds they are all appearing in thought so none is more real than any other.

That is a great find Louise! All the images are appearing in thought so no one image can be more real than another.

So is the mental sound of Louise's voice evidence that Louise exists?
Is the mental image of Louise working evidence that Louise exists?
Is the mental image of Louise walking evidence that Louise exists?

Are any of these mental images more real than the mental image of Santa?

So sensation and awareness I dont' think happen independently of each other, but are they different. They feel different, have different qualities. Sensation is sensation - tension, buzzing, heat etc. Other objects ie sounds, sights are also possible to describe precisely. Awareness is.....how to describe?! I don't know how to describe awareness in AE other than a vague broad sense, partly coming from my head but also from all around, just being, not very tangible.....? Any help appreciated please!

Attention certainly shifts, but is this evidence of awareness seperate from actual experience?
Look at sound. Is it possible to separate sound and awareness of it?
When looking at sound, is there anywhere that sound isn't?

I don't know what is looking - there is the object in all it's detail - I'm an artist so I look at things a lot and see things in abstract terms ie light, shape etc. The objects are there in my sight line. I can't see my face so there's the wierd experience of falling in to the world, or the world falling in to me, this big hole around my face where there is no boundary between inside and outside. I dont' know who or what is looking. I'm used to saying I am, this Louise in this physical body, and that still makes sense but when I really look that is harder to define. The objects are there and something is seeing them, otherwise they wouldn't be seen.

Lie down with eyes closed.
Is is possible to tell anything about height?
Is it possible to feel the mass of the body?
Weight or width?

Looking at sensation, is it possible to find a boundary between the skin and the clothes? Or a boundary between the body and the bed/floor?
Is it possible to find any boundaries?

Is it possible to find and inside or outside.

It it possible that there is a Louise "in here"?

Lots of love

Nina
Xxxx

Hi Nina, no worries if you miss a day, I just keep enquiring, there are many pointers! And I mentioned I tend to have a screen free day on Sundays so won't post then.

Confusion is what happens until it all becomes clear.

That's good to hear.

So is the mental sound of Louise's voice evidence that Louise exists? I don't know. There is the voice and the thought 'that's my voice'. The voice of all thoughts I hear in my head is in this same tone and type (and as I type that mental sound is repeating the words) and there's the thought that's because it's how I hear it when I speak (though I agree it's different, it's a silent voice in that no-one else can hear it.
Is the mental image of Louise working evidence that Louise exists? Well there's mental images of Louise, which are derived from imagining the physical structure of my body and the surroundings of the place I work in.Memories/imagination. So they are not real as such, but based on past experience.
Is the mental image of Louise walking evidence that Louise exists? I don't know....what is evidence? Thoughts are produced about all sorts of things from things that have happened or imaginary things.

Are any of these mental images more real than the mental image of Santa?

! None are more real than any others though the source of Louise images is more real than the source of Santa images.

Attention certainly shifts, but is this evidence of awareness seperate from actual experience? No, awareness is linked to whatever piece of experience is happening at that moment. The awareness shifts as the pieces of experience shift. There is sense of awareness being greater than each piece of experience, or holding it all, it feels more expansive than the more focussed units of a particular sight or sound, but I don't experience awareness without a sound/sight/sensation, and I couldn't possibly experience any unit of AE without awareness or I wouldn't be aware of it, it wouldn't be there.
Look at sound. Is it possible to separate sound and awareness of it? No
When looking at sound, is there anywhere that sound isn't?

If it's very quiet there is always the buzzing in my ears. Asleep at night I'm not aware of sound, unless something wakes me. So sound isn't there when I'm asleep (though there may be sounds happening but I don't hear them) but neither is (conscious) awareness.

Lie down with eyes closed.
Is is possible to tell anything about height?
Is it possible to feel the mass of the body?
Weight or width?

I've looked at this a lot over the years. No there are just some sensations, then thoughts that might interpret those sensations as pressure, weight, contact.

Looking at sensation, is it possible to find a boundary between the skin and the clothes? Or a boundary between the body and the bed/floor?
Is it possible to find any boundaries?

Just sensations, no boundaries.

Is it possible to find and inside or outside. There's a sense that the sensations are located in different parts of space that correlate to areas more inside the body or more towards the edge ie tummy ache, headache. So I can't detect specific boundaries but the sensation does have location.

It it possible that there is a Louise "in here"?

That seems quite a bizarre thought like a little gnome controlling proceedings. I think 'I have a body, it's my body' but my body is not me, I am not in my body; inside my physical body is just organs and bones etc. So I associate Louise more with thought or 'conciousness' or awareness, the mental plane. Who am I, who is Louise? Where am I? When I look at individual places - the body, different senses, thoughts, I see none are intrinsically Louise, but there is the overall sense of Louise and someone controlling things. I know I might be going back wards, but I think I need to cover all ground to get to see this.....still not clear.

Thank you for all this input and hope you have a good week Nina,

Love, Louise

Hi Louise!

In the subject of the reality of mental images:

None are more real than any others though the source of Louise images is more real than the source of Santa images.

Let's test this out.

Sit with eyes closed for several minutes.
Look at a mental image of "Louise". Really see how clear you can make the mental image.
When the image is an clear as possible, open the eyes and see if it is possible to find that image in actual experience. Look at what can be seen of "Louise".
Find a mirror. Is that "mental image" reflected back from the mirror?

I think 'I have a body, it's my body' but my body is not me, I am not in my body; inside my physical body is just organs and bones etc. So I associate Louise more with thought or 'conciousness' or awareness, the mental plane.

"I am not in my body" - where is consciousness or awareness or the mental plane located exactly.

Where is the evidence for consciousness seperate from actual experience?

Where is the evidence for awareness seperate from actual experience?

What exactly is the "mental plane"? Does is exist in Actual Experience?

Put some music on and LOOK. Ask the following question sentence while the music plays.

There is sound.
Is an "I" required for sound to happen?

Where EXACTLY does consciousness begin and sound end? Really look.

Where EXACTLY is the "I" that is located in consciousness? Really Look.


SLOWLY - Look at what is looking. Is there an "I" looking?

Who am I, who is Louise? Where am I? When I look at individual places - the body, different senses, thoughts, I see none are intrinsically Louise, but there is the overall sense of Louise and someone controlling things. I know I might be going back wards, but I think I need to cover all ground to get to see this.....still not clear.

There is a sense of Louise and someone controlling things.

Read those coloured words.

What is recognising those words?
What is recognising those words?
Is a controller required?

What is typing the reply exactly?
How do the fingers know where to move to land on the right letters?
What exactly is instructing the fingers to move?
Really LOOK.
What can be found?


Very best wishes

Nina
Xxxx

Sit with eyes closed for several minutes.
Look at a mental image of "Louise". Really see how clear you can make the mental image.
When the image is an clear as possible, open the eyes and see if it is possible to find that image in actual experience. Look at what can be seen of "Louise".
Find a mirror. Is that "mental image" reflected back from the mirror?

The more I focus on the mental image of Louise the less clear it becomes, or rather I become aware how unclear it is, and more looking doesn't make it any clearer. Mental images are distant and feint and it's more the memory of them - ie I don't see them as I'm having them but just after I recall that I've just been thinking about something with the mental image. So when I look it's really really hard to see any mental images - all I see is the colour/light etc on the inside of my eyelids. And I feel frustration because I'm trying to do something that's not working out...but then I guess I just need to stay with what is happening!

"I am not in my body" - where is consciousness or awareness or the mental plane located exactly. It feels very spacious like there is no specific location. Thoughts feel like they are located in my head, but awareness feels like it expands and is diffuse and all around. It is located wherever my attention is. Conciousness I don't know because I'm not sure exactly what this is - thoughts and awareness I have a stronger sense of what they are so it's easier to define/locate.

Where is the evidence for consciousness seperate from actual experience? I don't think there is any evidence in actual experience, just thoughts/ideas about it. As things are happening in actual experience, consciousness is there to perceive/receive them, but they are completely co-dependant. I have this image of consciousness like air travelling and meeting the point of contact of the source of sight, sound etc, but I realise that's a thought, imagination of what is happening. In AE as I hear a sound I am automatically conscious of it, so they happen at the same time.

Where is the evidence for awareness seperate from actual experience? Only that awareness seems to be present as a 'backdrop to the comings and goings of different moments in experience. But I guess again that's a thought/imagination, that there is some continuity to awareness whereas sounds/sights etc are ever changing, coming and going. In AE awareness and the object of awareness happen at the same time and are just precisely about that particular moment.

What exactly is the "mental plane"? Does is exist in Actual Experience?

It's thinking, so it's the coming and going of thoughts which does exist in AE

Put some music on and LOOK. Ask the following question sentence while the music plays.

There is sound.
Is an "I" required for sound to happen?
Well I have to be here to hear the sound - if I didn't exist the sound might happen but I wouldn't be there to hear it.

Where EXACTLY does consciousness begin and sound end? Really look.
I'm finding 'really looking' really hard! There is a lot of effort and a thought of not being able to do it. I don't know how to really look. I think it begins and ends with thought. It's happening and thinking creates an idea about consciousness as a concept, something that it can describe.

Where EXACTLY is the "I" that is located in consciousness? Really Look.
I can't find a specific location.


SLOWLY - Look at what is looking. Is there an "I" looking?

There is hard, frustrated thinking looking, and that's what I associate as I, I think, but I'm not sure. This feels unfinished but is as far as I can go at the moment, today. I think I need to look more softly, again it's giving me a headache. I will try again to look with the heart as you suggested.

I will look at the last questions later, need to go now,

Love,
Louise

Hi Louise!

The more I focus on the mental image of Louise the less clear it becomes, or rather I become aware how unclear it is, and more looking doesn't make it any clearer. Mental images are distant and feint and it's more the memory of them - ie I don't see them as I'm having them but just after I recall that I've just been thinking about something with the mental image. So when I look it's really really hard to see any mental images - all I see is the colour/light etc on the inside of my eyelids. And I feel frustration because I'm trying to do something that's not working out...but then I guess I just need to stay with what is happening!

Is there any sense that mental images are "real" or "solid" or "unchanging"?
Is the content of thought real or unreal?

Is the Louise in thought distant and feint- just the "memory" of something?

What is "memory" exactly? Is it different from any other kind of thought?

In actual experience there is colour on the eyelids.
Is actual experience real?

What is more real?
The thought of "Louise"
Or the actual experience of colour on the eyelids?

Very best wishes

Nina

Xxxx

Is there any sense that mental images are "real" or "solid" or "unchanging"?
They are not solid, they are very insubstantial, feint, distant, hard to catch or pin down. They are constantly changing, just appearing and disappearing.
Is the content of thought real or unreal?
I don't know what is meant by 'real' to answer this? The content is words, ideas, conversations, planning, repeating, working out, pondering etc....just thought but it's not like a real conversation or out loud words that someone else could hear.

Is the Louise in thought distant and feint- just the "memory" of something? Yes

What is "memory" exactly? Is it different from any other kind of thought? I guess it's a kind of thought based on something that has happened as opposed to the kind of thought that imagines something that might happen - past and future.

In actual experience there is colour on the eyelids. Yes
Is actual experience real? Yes I guess it's real, it's what is happening...so back to the content of thought and the question 'is that real'....the reality is the voices, sounds I hear in my mind....the content is, well it's not actually happening, it's thinking about things that have happened or might happen so it was once real, but in that moment the only reality is the experience of thinking.

What is more real?
The thought of "Louise"
Or the actual experience of colour on the eyelids?

The experience of colour on the eyelids is much more tangible - very tangible, I could describe or draw it, whereas the image of Louise in thought is very difficult to pin point

Thanks Nina....x

Hi Louise!

I am away for the weekend but here is an exercise about the content of thought:

Take a spoon from the draw. Look at it carefully. Look at the shape, shadows, reflections, colours. Feel the weight.
Now put it back in the drawer.

Now close the eyes and imagine the spoon in as much detail as possible.
Can the weight be felt?
Can it be used to eat with?

Which is more real?
The spoon in the drawer or the mental image?


Try this exercise.

You are in the desert becoming increasingly thirsty. A man offers you:

A) a bottle of water
B) a piece of paper with "bottle of water" written on it.

Which do you choose?

Best wishes

Nina
Xxx

Ok thanks Nina - have a wonderful weekend and I'll be in touch again next week....well I may post over the weekend too. xx

Hi Louise!

Are you there?

Nina
Xxx

Hi Nina

I hope you had a good weekend.

Yes I'm here. Mother's day and now my last 2 days at work + insomnia and some drama/not feeling great + nervously anticipating flying to the States next week + big family event next weekend, and trying (unsucessfully) to convert all that to excitement. Lots on and you were away, so I paused on the enquiry and bought a few more art books from Amazon to try and make me feel better!!! That's life and habits, but back to this, which is good to have daily, so thanks for your prompt.....

Take a spoon from the draw. Look at it carefully. Look at the shape, shadows, reflections, colours. Feel the weight.
Now put it back in the drawer.
Now close the eyes and imagine the spoon in as much detail as possible.
Can the weight be felt?
Can it be used to eat with?
Which is more real?
The spoon in the drawer or the mental image?

I've just done it and it's really obvious that the real spoon is more real than the mental image. I've read/heard from neuroscience that the mind/body can't tell the difference between real things and imagined things - an actual experience and a virtual one (watching a film/imagining a scenario) can have the same impact on physiology, emotions, mental state. I did NLP at one point which shows how powerful the mind can be to influence outcomes....a bit of sidetrack and I know the task here is to focus on direct experience and see through the illusion of a separate self, the identity of Louise. I suppose I like explanations and knowing how things work!

You are in the desert becoming increasingly thirsty. A man offers you:
A) a bottle of water
B) a piece of paper with "bottle of water" written on it.
Which do you choose?

I'd be mad not to choose A!

One from earlier that I haven't respond to yet...

There is a sense of Louise and someone controlling things.

Read those coloured words.

What is recognising those words? I don't know, they are recognized, known, the meaning is known somehow magically. I can rationalize that that I've learnt English and it's my clever mind translating meaning, but meaning is hard to pin point . If I say 'I' am recognizing the words then I have to look for what is 'I', and so far I seems to be a collection of thoughts, memories, mental processes, bodily feelings, not one 'thing' that exists but a sense of something created out of a mixture of those things.
Is a controller required? Well no it just happens. If I look at the words and read them I can't control things to not take in the meaning.

What is typing the reply exactly? In reality thoughts arrive in my mind - ie as my voice but not out loud, and my fingers type the letters that represent those thoughts.
How do the fingers know where to move to land on the right letters? When I learnt to type it was very slow and deliberate but now it happens spontaneously though if I stop and make it deliberate it stops working properly. It's quite magic really - I know it as the 4th stage of learning 'unconscious competence'. So all these things that seem to happen without a controller I would describe as happening from the unconscious...but I can't know how that happens in actual experience because it is not in conscious awareness.
What exactly is instructing the fingers to move?
Really LOOK.
What can be found?

.
It's really hard to pin point anything, it does seem like it just does it, thoughts come in and the fingers type the letters and words.....then delete or change as thoughts change, better wording, better meaning.

And another.....

SLOWLY - Look at what is looking. Is there an "I" looking?

There is looking and there are thoughts in response to that, and body sensations while sitting here - quite a lot of discomfort today. Then thoughts about the discomfort. Seeing happens if my eyes are open - whatever is in front of me, and if they are shut I see colours and shadows on my eyelids. Its' true I don't have to do anything to see - no I is needed to see, but when I say that I realize I associate' I' with existing/being and the capacity to experience things through the senses....so it's not clear. If there is no I then there would be no sight, sound etc?

Thanks for reading Nina. Am I being slow, I feel I should get this, and little moments do give me glimpses of 'that's really obvious' but overall I'm not sure?
Best wishes
Louise

Hi Louise!

The inquiry is going really well.

I suppose I like explanations and knowing how things work!

What happens if there are no explanations?
Is it difficult not to have thoughts explaining what is going on?

Am I being slow, I feel I should get this, and little moments do give me glimpses of 'that's really obvious' but overall I'm not sure?

What is there to get? Is there an expectation of what will happen? Will it be like another experience?
Where is the "I" that will "get this"?
What exactly is "being slow"?


Try this very simple exercise:

Comment on what is happening in the moment.
"I am cooking"
"I am dancing"
"I am walking" etc.

Drop the "I am".
Use the verb - cooking, dancing, walking, showering etc.

What is the difference?

Very best wishes
Nina
Xxxx

Morning Nina

Hi Louise!

The inquiry is going really well.

That's good to hear!!! I notice something likes/needs that affirmation - like, how am I getting on? It's encouraging.

What happens if there are no explanations?
Is it difficult not to have thoughts explaining what is going on?

No explanations and I feel a bit lost. It is what it is then, unexplained, a mystery, and it's difficult to be with mystery and not understand it. Yes very difficult not to have thoughts explaining what's going on. I like to understand the world, but I guess I've always done that by thinking, reading, discussing. Less by just being in touch with sensate experience. I'm fascinated in books/ideas on science and spirituality and 'energy medicine', read lots.......( I'm not reading anything at the moment as agreed!)

What is there to get? Is there an expectation of what will happen? Will it be like another experience?
There's an expectation that I will understand this process. I have read the gateless gate and have an idea of how it is seen that there is no 'I' so I expect I will suddenly or gradually realise that and know it. So yes an experience or rather an understanding/knowing/realizing. Something will be different, will change.
Where is the "I" that will "get this"?
I dont' know, the I is increasingly not a specific thing, I'm realising it's a sense of Louise made up of lots of different thoughts, feelings, sensations etc, but something will shift as a result of this enquiry, or something will drop away, a sense of ah ha.
What exactly is "being slow"?

My thinking, judging mind thinks I might be slow at getting this. I don't know how long it takes. The process is interesting, compelling but also quite confusing and frustrating. So there is still a sense of I, Louise taking time, being a bit confused or not quite 'there', bright enough to get this shift.

Drop the "I am".
Use the verb - cooking, dancing, walking, showering etc.

Yes I've played with this before, and it's quite refreshing, less personal and just straightforward, simpler. It's happening anyway, and I add the 'I' to it. I will practice this as I go about the day.

Thank you!!
Love, Louise

Hello Louise!

No explanations and I feel a bit lost. It is what it is then, unexplained, a mystery, and it's difficult to be with mystery and not understand it. Yes very difficult not to have thoughts explaining what's going on.

The experience of thought is just one of the senses. Sound, colour, smell, taste, sensation and thought.

The content of thought, as shown below the spoon and desert exercise, is not real. So while the experience of thought is real, the content of thought ( the stories) is not real.

But thought overlays all experience telling a story about it. That is just a habit.

Where does the "I" turn up? Where is the only place "I" is seen?
Sound?
Colour?
Smell?
Sensation?
Taste?
Thought?

The I is increasingly not a specific thing, I'm realising it's a sense of Louise made up of lots of different thoughts, feelings, sensations etc, but something will shift as a result of this enquiry, or something will drop away, a sense of ah ha.

Have a good look. Where is "Louise"?
Thought? - how many thoughts are about Louise?
Sensation? - is there a sensation that is Louise?

Good luck!

Lots of love

Nina
Xxxx