Please can I have a guide?

[Carrie]

Hello nome,

Yes... even when the illusion of a separate self is clearly seen, getting lost in the stories/thoughts can still happen.

Here are a few questions to help clarify and consolidate your process... Some of them sound like repeats of things that have already been asked, but please take your time and answer as you see it now from direct experience.

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

5) Do you decide, intend, choose, control events in Life? Do you make anything happen? Give examples from your experience.

6) Anything to add?

I look forward to your answers!

Love, Carrie


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[nome]

Dear Carrie

Right, it's been a very long day but let's see how and if I can consolidate this when feeling tired rather than just lively and alert :) It may be more realistic.

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

NO!!! How utterly and bewilderingly incredible, yet so real.

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

This illusion starts as soon as I start thinking. Rather than witnessing thoughts as thoughts, as well as experiences and things in the world as just happening, I hook into and try to own these thoughts, objects or experiences and then believe and act as if they are mine and/or about ‘me.’ I think that thoughts are reality; and therefore I believe and think I perceive a separate self - but this is the illusion. But when I check this in DE there is no such thing. There is no sense of me, I, anything separate.

3) How does it feel to see this?

A mixture of things: largely relief and celebration, due to a certain extent that this lifelong quest is over. This is also mildly tinged with sadness because at an emotional level I need to let go of something (I think this lifelong quest) but this is only very small and I accept it as another thought and possibly inevitable. It also feels quite underwhelming as I have said before – I quite like that – but it has made me doubt more – but I am passed that now. I also feel genuine excitement at the potential of being able to see past this illusion on a more regular and meaningful basis.

What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

Well this is huge. I only had an intellectual understanding of this illusion before; I had never actually ‘experienced’ it fully; in fact - correction - I have experienced it looking back, a lot, but had never realised that’s what it was!

Just in day to day experience I am checking my thoughts and actions a lot more and seeing thoughts as just thoughts. I have been doing this both consciously and unconsciously but the difference in my day to day experience is significant. Too much to list!

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

I am not sure that there was a ‘last thing that pushed me over;’ more one of those ‘a-ha’ moments which was on the morning of February 20th when I read your post and I had this clarity of realising that the answers were to be found in DE only – thinking, including doubting, questioning, checking etc. was not going to get me anywhere at all. This really was the biggest revelation of all. (I seem to remember that I said the ‘f’ word at the time out loud to myself!)

5) Do you decide, intend, choose, control events in Life? Do you make anything happen? Give examples from your experience.

I notice that in some instances, there are several thoughts that might surround an impending action but that these thoughts and actions are entirely separate. The illusion is that sometimes they coincide and appear that they are related causally which then gives me the sense that I am the controller and making choices and decisions; but in DE this is not apparent at all; so again it is illusory. There are thoughts, one after the other, and at some unpredictable moment an action occurs, that is all.

6) Anything to add?

A huge huge thank you so far for all your wisdom and patience. It is hard to put this gratitude into words as I feel it so strongly. It is the greatest gift you could give anyone.

Loads of love and appreciation

xx

[Carrie]

Dear Nome,

Thank you. Wonderful to read your answers. Question 5 just needs an actual example, like the one you gave earlier in the thread about teas when looking at choice/chooser... Please have a look again here and now at apparent different options and write back what happens.

Love,Carrie x

[nome]

Hi Carrie

Yes of course - in fact I was quite aware of many yesterday and forgot to be specific.

I caught a late train home last night which involves one change - I can do this early in the journey or later on. As I was sitting on the train there were thoughts relating to these two options, one after the other and I was aware that I was thinking about them as pros and cons. I hadn't at this point settled on a better option. These thoughts then stopped as other unrelated thoughts occurred. I started reading my book and when I got to the first option station there were no related thoughts and I just remained seated. There were no thoughts related to remaining seated or justifying my choice, I just remained seated and carried on reading my book.

I am happy to expand or give other examples. I keep noticing this a lot in my experience - all different types of choices and actions - and their tenuous link :)

Just to add, a visual analogy that has helped me with this process is the 'Kanisza Illusion' - simple, but has resonated with me on this; and the whole illusion of a separate self.

Thanks again Carrie
xx

[Carrie]

Hi Nome,

Thanks for expanding on how choosing happens. I had to google 'Kanisza Illusion' cause I didn't know what it was! I can see the connection for you.... A number of phenomena interrelated appearing to add up to a specific whole.... I.e. The illusory triangle/self.

I am happy to expand or give other examples. I keep noticing this a lot in my experience - all different types of choices and actions - and their tenuous link :)

I will share our dialogue with the other guides to see if they have any other questions or would like more expansion on this or any other aspects of our dialogue.

Love,

Sudakini

[Carrie]

.... Used my Buddhist name at the end go that last post by mistake. Xx Carrie/Sudakini

[nome]

Hi Carrie

I wouldn't expect anyone to know the Kanizsa Illusion but know it is very 'googleable,' at least if I had spelt it correctly!

Thank you again

xx

[Carrie]

Dear Nome,

Our dialogue is complete... There are no more questions from me or other guides. Congratulations!

It has been a pleasure and a delight to have this conversation with you and I wish you the best of everything as life continues.

Please go to this link for some guidance on what next and 'after care'....

http://liberationunleashed.com/nation/v ... ?f=6&t=696

Much love, Carrie x x

[nome]

Dear Carrie

A really big thank you for your generosity and clarity. You have been so affirming and positive which has really helped me in this process. It has been wonderful to share this with you and I will miss our conversations!

I too wish you all the best and again, huge thanks for what I consider to be the greatest gift.

Lots of love
xx