The Gate

Hi Mike

Looking does now show a dividing line between the sound and the hearing of it

Am assuming you meant ‘not’ instead of ‘now’?
Can you see a dividing line between you and any other sense? Can you see a line between sight and the seeing of something, between touch and the feeling of it, between taste and the tasting of it? Look.

‘nausea, sadness, tightness in body’

Sit with these sensations. Look at them. Look at the labelling. Look at the thoughts or story that attach at the end of this list if any. What is your direct experience of these words. Do they exist? How do you know they are there? List your direct experience. Are they sensations again? Are they just thoughts again? Look very closely. Which comes first the sensation or the thoughts? Don’t pay attention to the thoughts just look at what they do, when they come in.

Looking shows no ‘I’ thought there is still a sense of separation ie the ‘sounds come from the distance’ – occasionally this ‘collapses’ into just sensation.

What is distance? A thought? What is your direct experience of distance? How do you know it exists? Do you mean the thoughts collapse sometimes and then you can recognise just sensation? Look.

Lots of intense sensations and thoughts during this one. There is such a strong concept of ‘cars along a road ... noise travelling to my ears as vibrations, hearing ie sensation happening at the ears but the sound being allocated over a the road outside my body” been meditating on this for a few hours.

What is concept? A thought? Keep looking at this. Look for the labelling thoughts. Can you not label? Can you sit without labelling? If not don’t worry about that just watch the thoughts attach to explain, prove, story write. Look. Thought separates.

Easier with music to feel ‘the music washing through the body’ ie as a sensation

Is it music you like? Try it with sound you ‘don’t’ like. See the thoughts attach.

still can’t get the scientific concept away

Your thinking mind will never get this! Thoughts cannot understand this. Thoughts just think, prove, story write etc. You cannot reason your way through this. You can only look. Thoughts want to understand – look for them – they will be there somewhere, wanting, pushing, telling, driving. Just recognise them and thank them for doing their job.

90-ish% of the time there is no ‘I’ label ... just the emotion label ... and that is changing

How? What are you experiencing here?
Love Sarah xx

Hi Sarah,

Assuming you mean ‘not’ instead of ‘now’

Yes. ‘Not’ is correct.

Can you see a dividing line between you and any other sense? Can you see a line between sight and the seeing of something, between touch and the feeling of it, between taste and the tasting of it?

Sight and the seeing – ‘sadness’, only when it gets labelled. Easy not to label. With sight there is depth perception, though this can be let go of. Looking does not show a line between sight and seeing of something

Touch and the feeling of it – no line – only once thought pops in is there a line .. e.g. ‘this is how it feels in my hands, this is how it feels in my heart and head.’

Taste and the tasting of it – no line – just a location

What this looking shows is that each sensation is given a spatial location relative to the body – awareness is around the body though the scope of it changes and it is especially around the head and anywhere sensations are, thoughts in the head, emotions are generally midline of body, touch sensations are anywhere on the surface, energy sensations are anywhere, taste is in the mouth, head and throat, sight has patterns outside the body or black if the eyes are shut and hearing is outside the body with sounds outside the body

So in looking, sensations are body centric – which is logical as they are of the body by definition. Maybe senses don’t need to be body centric e.g. dreaming or visions ...

Sit with these sensations. Look at them. Look at the labelling. Look at the thoughts or story that attach at the end of this list if any. What is your direct experience of these words. Do they exist? How do you know they are there? List your direct experience. Are they sensations again? Are they just thoughts again? Look very closely. Which comes first the sensation or the thoughts? Don’t pay attention to the thoughts just look at what they do, when they come in.

‘I’ quoted these ‘’ to show this is not the direct experience but convenient labels as a short cut to share what’s happening ie direct felt experience ... better to report from felt direct experience which ‘I’ will from now on.

Direct experience is something like: Tightness in the stomach, throat, forehead ... thought labels ‘bored’ ‘sadness’ ... sensation through all stomach, throat, forehead like ‘movement’ so the felt experience is changing with time ... lightness in head, blurred vision, tightness in throat, yawn ... only thoughts are how to express this direct felt experience in writing

They are sensations, followed by thought which labels, sometimes followed by story either explaining, complaining or wanting change.

The words don’t exist, they are labels. Yes, just thoughts again. Sensation first then thought.
When do thoughts come in ... they come in when there is a void, nothing only sensation.

What is distance? A thought? What is your direct experience of distance? How do you know it exists?.

Distance is a thought. My direct experience with whatever ‘distance’ is pointing to is that it takes time and movement to go places, get or relocate things – how ever real or unreal they are. ‘Others’ experience is reportedly different (direct or otherwise), though these are all stories.

‘I’ don’t know distance exists – but if this world exists then there is some limitation or feature that is ‘distance’ like.

Do you mean the thoughts collapse sometimes and then you recognise just sensation? Look

No. Occasionally sound and feeling collapse so sound is sensed and felt in the body. Even still, the sound seems to be outside the body.

What is concept? A thought? Keep looking at this. Look for the labelling thoughts. Can you not label? Can you sit without labelling? If not don’t worry about that just watch the thoughts attach to explain, prove, story write. Look. Thought separates.

Yes concept is a thought, is not real.

‘I’ can not label and sit without labelling the majority of the time.

Looking today makes the thoughts more frequent.

Is it music you like? Try it with sound you ‘don’t’ like. See the thoughts attach

No I didn’t like the music – it was whilst my flatmate was vacuuming –
I watched thoughts try to attach to say this music/vacuum sound is wrong during answering these questions then thoughts quickly attached so say this is perfect experience of sound! Which is where they stayed as it seemed more useful.

Your thinking mind will never get this! Thoughts cannot understand this. Thoughts just think, prove, story write etc. You cannot reason your way through this. You can only look. Thoughts want to understand – look for them – they will be there somewhere, wanting, pushing, telling, driving. Jus recognise them and thank them for doing their job.

Looking ... and thanking ... lots of thoughts.

How? What are you experiencing here?

How? – Thoughts are quiet or something catches them and stops them or they have been trained to just label without ‘I’ eg “There is sadness” or “Sadness” not “I am sad” nor “I am feeling sad”


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Love, Mike

Hi Mike

Touch and the feeling of it – no line – only once thought pops in is there a line .. e.g. ‘this is how it feels in my hands, this is how it feels in my heart and head.’

Yes. Exactly.

Taste and the tasting of it – no line – just a location

Check location – is that a thought or a sensation?

So in looking, sensations are body centric – which is logical as they are of the body by definition. Maybe senses don’t need to be body centric e.g. dreaming or visions ...

Try this one. Shut your eyes. Where is the body? Don’t use touch. What is body? How do you know its there? Is it sensation that tells you its there? Is it sensation then thought? Look.

No. Occasionally sound and feeling collapse so sound is sensed and felt in the body. Even still, the sound seems to be outside the body.

So is sound separate from the hearing of it? If so does sound sit around waiting for something to hear it? How can that be proved? You would have to prove the existence of a sound waiting to be heard.

‘I’ can not label and sit without labelling the majority of the time.

But are you seeing the labelling process more clearly now? Are you seeing thoughts separating everything? Are you seeing how the thoughts attach and spread and build? Can you watch them like clouds drifting across the sky?

Your thinking mind will never get this! Thoughts cannot understand this. Thoughts just think, prove, story write etc. You cannot reason your way through this. You can only look. Thoughts want to understand – look for them – they will be there somewhere, wanting, pushing, telling, driving. Jus recognise them and thank them for doing their job.

Looking ... and thanking ... lots of thoughts.

Keep looking for this please.

How? – Thoughts are quiet or something catches them and stops them or they have been trained to just label without ‘I’ eg “There is sadness” or “Sadness” not “I am sad” nor “I am feeling sad”

Could it be that this is what happened already it was just thoughts that said otherwise? That sadness was just that – floating into awareness, that other emotions just float into the awareness and float out again. Could it be that sounds just float into the awareness and out again? Could it be that your body just floats into awareness and out again? Look.
Sarah xx

Hi Sarah,

Taste ... check the location is that a thought or a sensation?

Location is a sensation.

Try this one. Shut your eyes. Where is the body? Don’t use touch. What is the body? How do you know it’s there? Is it sensation that tells you it’s there? Is it sensation then thought? Look

There are just sensations. No ‘body’

The ‘body’ is a thought. A story.

No sensation is sensation. Thoughts and stories tell ‘me’ it’s there.
Sensation then thought.

So is sound separate from the hearing of it? If so does sound sit around waiting for something to hear it? How can that be proved? You would have to prove the existence of sound waiting to be heard.

Direct experience does not show sound separate from hearing. It does not show conclusive evidence that it is not separate either. Perhaps looking does not see it.

In ‘my’ experience of sound ‘I’ haven’t seen a separation between sound and hearing of it. This does not prove there is not a separation.

‘I’ can’t answer the other questions as they are story and thoughts only ... outside my direct experience. They rely on a few assumptions - there is sound, there is something to hear it, there is hearing. In story world there are many examples to look at – whales can hear sounds we can’t ... my friend hears a sound which I don’t hear until I tune into it – did it exist for them and not for me until I heard it or was it always there for anyone to hear? ... All of this is of the mind, of thoughts, outside direct experience and can be theorised about but not direct experienced it seems.

But are you seeing the labelling process more clearly now?

Yes the labelling process is clear. Sometimes it is too quick for me to see the gap between sensation and thought. Have watched labelling in sight and feeling for a long time ... doing this for sound is new ...

Are you seeing thoughts separating everything?

No. Rarely. Will watch closely today.

Are you seeing how the thoughts attach and spread and build?

Yes

Can you watch them like clouds drifting across the sky?

Yes mostly .. sometimes ‘I’ get lost in them and then ‘pop up the other side’ ie something goes ‘thoughts! Story!’ and then ‘I’ see them passing again. OR ‘daydreams’ ‘feels nice’ ‘shall I stay here?’ and either complete the day dream or return to direct experiencing

keep looking for thoughts ... Keep looking for this please.

Looking :)

Could it be that this is what happened already it was just thoughts that said otherwise? That sadness was just that – floating into awareness , that other emotions just float into the awareness and flout out again.

Yes it could be. That is my direct experience.

Could it be that sounds just float into the awareness and out again?

Yes it could be. That is my direct experience of sounds

Could it be that your body just floats into the awareness and out again? Look

Yes it could be. That is my direct experience at times – during dreams... during sleep... during mediation

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Love, Mike

Hi Mike

Your original expectations:

this process will lead to wherever it leads to. I expect the process itself to be a deep, insights and change into life and myself / thoughts / attitudes / beliefs. it is a realisation that I’ve been viewing the world/universe/life/myself wrongly – so it’s a paradigm shift and that then triggers a process of unwinding of untruths.

Do you still have expectations about this process? If so what? Do you still expect to feel permanently aware, permanently truth realised?

Is there anything else you think you need to ‘get’?

Do you feel separate, that the world is out there and you are in here? Is there an experiencer or is there just awarenessing?

Do you feel you have seen through the illusion of self?

Do you feel a shift has happened, or is happening?

How do you feel about where you are now?

Love Sarah xx

Hi Sarah,
Interestingly enough I wrote the below about two hours before I read your message and answered the questions...

There are a few other things going on ...

There is pretty much constantly two thought tracks going on – one is a song playing in ‘my’ head and the other is the other usual thought type track we have been talking about (labelling, proving, questioning, etc...).

‘I’m not sure how to handle the song track during this process. It’s been there for about a week, the songs change, though they are generally from the songs that I’m learning on my guitar ... it’s there 90% of the time.

Also the thought track has really intensified in the last three days going from quite spacious around thoughts to lots of daydreaming and constant thoughts – ‘I’ say ‘thank you’ as per your suggestion maybe 100 times a minute now whereas before it felt like 10 times a minute.

But then isn’t ‘thank you’ just another thought? What’s the purpose in this?

Is this what you mean by ‘‘I’ see thoughts everywhere’? ‘I’ feel something then it is in part of the body, ‘I’ don’t see the naming thought, it like there is a continuous thought saying body 24x7. ‘I’ have spent the last 8 years doing practices that map energy, sensations and emotions onto the body – shamanism, meridian meditations, visualisation, yoga, qigong, emotional release technique, Tantra ...

In the past ‘I’ would use mental/psychological/spiritual technique (whatever the correct classification of the technique is) to throw these thoughts into the bin, blow the energy out my head, bring ‘myself’ back to the now, to identify the emotion, where it is in the body, relaxing, expressing possibly and letting it go.

So now ‘I’m just sitting with – there is ‘I’, no body, thoughts are story, there are no emotions – it’s all just sensation, awareness and thoughts and trying to process at a sensation level rather than use these other techniques and it’s not working – by not working ‘I’ mean it’s not comfortable, thoughts escalate rather than reduce.

‘I’ don’t know how ‘I’ should be or how to make decisions ie what’s best for me right now technique A or B ... and then ‘I’ don’t want to use thoughts, actually ‘I’m not sure when thoughts are useful now or not – you asked me if ‘I’ know the difference between useful and not useful thoughts – can you teach me?

What to do? Should ‘I’ do these other techniques during this process? One of the agreements was no other spiritual practices. Can you define what is a ‘spiritual practice’ in this context?

Do you still have expectations about this process? If so do you still expect to feel permanently aware, permanently truth realised?

Looking does not show any expectations.

Is there anything else you think you need to ‘get’?

Thoughts that sound is not complete. Thoughts that strongly identify me with the body. Thoutghts that ‘I wish thoughts would stop making decision and I would live from flow/spirit/awareness/happening’. Thoughts that these three probably aren’t finished.

Thought that there should be some kind of sign, a realisation, flash of light, vision, pronouncement from some being, stepping into other realms, or profound change that would announce something/mark a milestone of a significant ‘shift’ as you put it below. Something!

Do you feel separate, that the world is out there and you are in here? Is there an experiencer or is there just awarenessing?

There is just awarenessing.

If feel there is a body and a not in the body... e.g. I think sound is coming from the traffic down the road.

Do you feel you have seen through illusion of self?

Partially. Body-identification is still there. Thoughts looking like they make decisions are still there.

Do you feel a shift has happened, or is happening?

A shift is happening. Similar to the shift that has been happening for the last 8 years.

How do you feel about where you are now?

My direct experience of this question is quiet and peaceful, almost nothing.

My thoughts want to say ‘I don’t believe it’, ‘this can’t be it’ ‘ can I hold this’

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Love, Mike

Hi Mike

‘I’ say ‘thank you’ as per your suggestion maybe 100 times a minute now whereas before it felt like 10 times a minute.

Is gratitude floating into and through you for seeing? Or is 'I' saying this is a waste of time! Look.

So now ‘I’m just sitting with – there is ‘I’, no body, thoughts are story, there are no emotions – it’s all just sensation, awareness and thoughts and trying to process at a sensation level rather than use these other techniques and it’s not working – by not working ‘I’ mean it’s not comfortable, thoughts escalate rather than reduce.

What is trying to process? What wants things to work? What is not comfortable? This sounds like you are back wanting thoughts to stop. Thoughts are clouds. Do you wish to stop clouds floating across the sky? Thoughts are weather. Do you wish to stop the weather? All is change and flux. Is it possible to stop anything? Look at the change and flux – see sensations float within your awareness. See emotions and feelings come and go, escalate and reduce. Look. What is wrong? What sees wrongness in any of this? Look.

‘I’ don’t know how ‘I’ should be or how to make decisions ie what’s best for me right now technique A or B ... and then ‘I’ don’t want to use thoughts, actually ‘I’m not sure when thoughts are useful now or not – you asked me if ‘I’ know the difference between useful and not useful thoughts – can you teach me?

When you play the guitar – where is ‘I’? Is ‘I’ loud or quiet? How do you know what to play and how to play it? Does the playing just happen (regardless of the sounds being made)? Look. Do decisions just happen? Do things get done? What wants to control and make decisions? Look through your day too. 'I' doesnt know anything but wants to know it all, to control all! Look. You dont need me to teach you anything, you simply need to look at want 'wants'.

What to do? Should ‘I’ do these other techniques during this process? One of the agreements was no other spiritual practices. Can you define what is a ‘spiritual practice’ in this context?

If there is a regular meditation/yoga practice then that’s fine. Spiritual book reading or looking at other schools of thought, practice will not help here. However look at what wants to 'do'. Thoughts again? Look. What wants to make itself feel better? What wants to solve the 'problem'? Again what sees wrongness here, rather than just frustration arising?

Thoughts that sound is not complete. Thoughts that strongly identify me with the body. Thoutghts that ‘I wish thoughts would stop making decision and I would live from flow/spirit/awareness/happening’. Thoughts that these three probably aren’t finished.

Could it be that this is what happened already it was just thoughts that said otherwise? That sadness was just that – floating into awareness , that other emotions just float into the awareness and flout out again.

Yes it could be. That is my direct experience.

This is what was stated by you in response to above – Look again. Decisions can be looked at certainly.

Thought that there should be some kind of sign, a realisation, flash of light, vision, pronouncement from some being, stepping into other realms, or profound change that would announce something/mark a milestone of a significant ‘shift’ as you put it below. Something!

Yes – this expectation is VERY common. I had it too. But this was NOT my experience. What expects a big bang, for realization to be permanent and clear, for a pronouncement? Thought again?

There is just awarenessing.

YES. So see this everywhere!

My direct experience of this question is quiet and peaceful, almost nothing.
My thoughts want to say ‘I don’t believe it’, ‘this can’t be it’ ‘ can I hold this’

Exactly! Hold on to what? Awareness? You never lost it!
Love Sarah xx

hi Sarah

I'm home late tonight and my computer has just blown up ... completely unusable ...

So I won't answer any questions tonight

I can use my tablet to reply tomorrow

I had a lovely day at Minyon falls ... beautiful national park.... lots of looking :-)

Love Mike

Hi Sarah

Is gratitude floating into and through you for seeing? Or is 'I' saying this is a waste of time! Look.

In the memory of this time it was more of a frustration, almost like weathering the storm of constant thoughts coming quickly, different to the slower pace of thoughts that I'd experienced in the previous weeks ...

'I' was saying 'I don't like this I want something different ... hard to remember the subtleties so I wont try

What is trying to process? What wants things to work? What is not comfortable? This sounds like you are back wanting thoughts to stop. Thoughts are clouds. Do you wish to stop clouds floating across the sky? Thoughts are weather. Do you wish to stop the weather? All is change and flux. Is it possible to stop anything? Look at the change and flux – see sensations float within your awareness. See emotions and feelings come and go, escalate and reduce. Look. What is wrong? What sees wrongness in any of this? Look.

Looking now shows just sensations, thoughts and awareness(STnAfor short). Reading what 'I' wrote has thought analysis thatconcludes that 'I' was judging what was being experienced and again saying 'I want something different'

The 'I' was trying to process ie thoughts trying to own what is happening.'I' wants things to work andis not comfortable.

Things stop ... but 'I' can not stop anything... there is nothing wrong- wrong does not exist - just thought judgements that say so, that have preference hence want things to be different.

When you play the guitar – where is ‘I’? Is ‘I’ loud or quiet? How do you know what to play and how to play it? Does the playing just happen (regardless of the sounds being made)? Look. Do decisions just happen? Do things get done? What wants to control and make decisions? Look through your day too. 'I' doesnt know anything but wants to know it all, to control all! Look. You dont need me to teach you anything, you simply need to look at want 'wants'.

Guitar ... the thought stream is constantly commenting, remembering, choosing. Will sit with 'quiet mind' and look at whst happens.

My day ... 'I' definitely wants to be seen to be in control, knowing, understandingmaking things happen, and deciding.

If there is a regular meditation/yoga practice then that’s fine. Spiritual book reading or looking at other schools of thought, practice will not help here. However look at what wants to 'do'. Thoughts again? Look. What wants to make itself feel better? What wants to solve the 'problem'? Again what sees wrongness here, rather than just frustration arising?

Today there hss been a lot of 'tiredness' looking show its only thoughts that want to change that or do something about it, to feel better, to solve and see wrongness.

Its the 'I' thought stream again.

This is what was stated by you in response to above – Look again. Decisions can be looked at certainly.

Are you suggesting that these things are complete and that thoughts just think otherwise?

With decisions it is on going moment to moment looking and awareness... it will change or nor when it does or doesn't

Yes – this expectation is VERY common. I had it too. But this was NOT my experience. What expects a big bang, for realization to be permanent and clear, for a pronouncement? Thought again?

Yes thought again ... heard many stories - possible that it happens for some and not for others.

YES. So see this everywhere! ....Exactly! Hold on to what? Awareness? You never lost it!

Am looking :-)


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Love, Mike

Hi Mike

Looking now shows just sensations, thoughts and awareness. The 'I' was trying to process ie thoughts trying to own what is happening.'I' wants things to work andis not comfortable.

Exactly!

My day ... 'I' definitely wants to be seen to be in control, knowing, understandingmaking things happen, and deciding.

Yes but does it control? Mind can say anything and lots of things but does it actually control anything? Look. Look on your day and look while playing guitar. Does the body work just fine without thought? Is thought more like a commentary rather than a controlling command? Look.

Its the 'I' thought stream again.

Is there anywhere that the ‘I’ stream isn’t? Look.

Are you suggesting that these things are complete and that thoughts just think otherwise?

I’m not suggesting anything. You tell me. Look. What else do you ‘think’ you need to know? And what tells you you need to know more?

With decisions it is on going moment to moment looking and awareness... it will change or nor when it does or doesn't

So do you control anything? Anywhere? Anytime? Look.
Love Sarah xx

Hi Sarah,

Yes but does it control? Mind can say anything and lots of things but does it actually control anything? Look. Look on your day and look while playing guitar. Does the body work just fine without thought? Is thought more like a commentary rather than a controlling command? Look.

As far as I have looked it does not control ... it likes to decide but whatever happens
Yes commentary

Is there anywhere that the ‘I’ stream isn’t? Look.

'I' dont see anywhere the I stream isnt ... It seems every thought is relative to 'I' - even 'theres a bird' is an I thought

I’m not suggesting anything. You tell me. Look. What else do you ‘think’ you need to know? And what tells you you need to know more?

'I' dont need to know anything more. And when 'I' think 'I' do its the 'I' again

So do you control anything? Anywhere? Anytime? Look

Noypt that looking shows ... things happen... i will observe control further...


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Love, Mike

Hi Mike

As far as I have looked it does not control ... it likes to decide but whatever happens. Yes commentary

Keep looking at the commentary. Watch it like clouds.

Noypt that looking shows ... things happen... i will observe control further...

Well if you have control – you can stop thoughts instantly and permanently! Look! You can control mood swings and emotions. Try it! See if this is possible? Have you ever bitten your tongue? How is that possible with control? Have you ever tripped up? How is that possible? Look at all the times you had no idea why you did something, said something, thought something, believed something………. Where is the control?

'I' dont see anywhere the I stream isnt ... It seems every thought is relative to 'I' - even 'theres a bird' is an I thought

Yes.

'I' dont need to know anything more. And when 'I' think 'I' do its the 'I' again

Do you feel ‘you’ has been revealed as imaginary? If so what remains?
Love Sarah xx

Hi Sarah

Commentary

'I'm watching the commentary.. becomes more clear it is just thought commentary

Well if you have control – you can stop thoughts instantly and permanently! Look! You can control mood swings and emotions. Try it! See if this is possible? Have you ever bitten your tongue? How is that possible with control? Have you ever tripped up? How is that possible? Look at all the times you had no idea why you did something, said something, thought something, believed something………. Where is the control?

Not possible in looking to stop thoughts or emotions permanently.
There is no control seen in looking .... the standard theory about involuntary actions is the unconscious mind model which can't be proven and 'I' didnt see it.

Do you feel ‘you’ has been revealed as imaginary? If so what remains?

No
I feel there is sadness and fear at non-identification with the body and there are beliefs that are holding onto body I'd.



Love Mike

Hi Mike

'I'm watching the commentary.. becomes more clear it is just thought commentary

Good. Use this below on your fear!

There is no control seen in looking .... the standard theory about involuntary actions is the unconscious mind model which can't be proven and 'I' didnt see it.

What direct experience do you have of the unconscious mind? Do you experience it? Put the standard theory aside and look. Do you see control anywhere? If so what has control? Where is this thing that has control?

I feel there is sadness and fear at non-identification with the body and there are beliefs that are holding onto body I'd.

Fear of what? What has fear? Is fear a thought? Is fear a sensation passing through? Look. What has fear? Or is there just fear arising? Find that fear, sit with it, watch it like a cat looking at a mouse hole? What has fear? Is there really a ‘you’ that has fear? Or is there simply fear passing like a cloud? Do you own fear? Is it yours? Or is it a bunch of feelings, emotions, sensations that have been labelled ‘fear’? What wants to not fear? What sees fear as bad and it must be responded to with sadness? What are beliefs? Thoughts again? Write out these beliefs and directly question each and everyone of them. Are they true? Or are you story building around a single thought? Look.
Love Sarah xx

Hi Sarah,

What direct experience do you have of the unconscious mind? Do you experience it? Put the standard theory aside and look. Do you see control anywhere? If so what has control? Where is this thing that has control?

No direct experience ... you asked how could it be possible - that is one possibility.
I do not see control anywhere

Fear of what? What has fear? Is fear a thought? Is fear a sensation passing through? Look. What has fear? Or is there just fear arising? Find that fear, sit with it, watch it like a cat looking at a mouse hole? What has fear? Is there really a ‘you’ that has fear? Or is there simply fear passing like a cloud? Do you own fear? Is it yours? Or is it a bunch of feelings, emotions, sensations that have been labelled ‘fear’?

There is a sensation then a thought. It passes.
Fear passes ... no me to own or have it. Its the label and story....

What wants to not fear? What sees fear as bad and it must be responded to with sadness? What are beliefs? Thoughts again? Write out these beliefs and directly question each and everyone of them. Are they true? Or are you story building around a single thought? Look

Thoughts want to not fear
Thoughts ... thoughts...thoughts
Beliefs are thoughts that some how are persistent
Belief: fear is bad or uncomfortable or signals danger or rejection or judgement by others
Belief: fear stops me
Non of these beliefs are true ... all stories


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Love, Mike