Please help me - FFS

[niall]

Hi again Jorge,

yes again, can you describe how it's feel?

It doesn't feel a lot different than before at the moment. Feelings of sadness came up yesterday with the realisation that 'I' have never existed - all that apparent history and story all lost in a flash. Just the emptiness. There are feelings that more will be revealed concerning the fullness of it all, but at the moment there's just the realisation of the emptiness.

Do you find a "doer"?
it's somebody "doing" things?

No, there's no doer of anything. Things are happening in this emptiness but nobody is doing anything.

another thing
Look at your hand... that hand... is yours?
describe how "you" do experience that hand

Ha, yeah looking at the hand is quite a strange one alright - it looks like some kind of primeval claw or something - it definitely isn't 'my' hand anymore!

Use your direct experience; describes what's happening, how do "you" feel this emptiness

There's a flurry of feelings/sensations arising - feelings of being overwhelmed by this vastness, yet the knowledge that there is no one to be overwhelmed. Freedom is there, maybe freedom isn't the right word, there's just this totality of nothing. Feelings that this is going to take a while to get used to are present.
Lots of laughing as well and gasping at the magnificence of the whole thing - there's all this and yet there's nothing.
Gonna have to stay with this for a while longer.

Thanks for now Jorge.

[Jorge786]

Hi Niall!

the world is the same world to me...
perception of the world is radically changed.

For this "me"... your are "cross" the line... congrats!!!
(there is no line and nobody who may cross but doesn't matter)
if you think like me... let me know!

Sadness is a feeling... like other feelings... like other thoughts and that specific feeling is normal... not everyday "you" have a such lost ;-)

please feel free to post what you want about your experiences, i'll be happy to read you

Enjoy!
Jorge

[niall]

Hi again Jorge,

Yeah, it's been an interesting couple of days alright. A lot of realisations and revelations, I know those kind of words can sound very grand and complicated, but isn't it just amazing how simply life becomes when 'I' don''t exist anymore?
It's seen now why people say it's the end of suffering - the suffering can continue, but not for 'me' - no more suffering for a 'me'.

It's about surrender, but it's not about 'me' surrendering, it's simple in the end, but there is no end!
It's seen clearly now how repetitive thought patterns caused a loop in thinking which caused so much suffering over the apparent years. Those thought patterns are pretty much still present now - but of course for no one. Sweet freedom!
Jorge, when you said the line had been crossed a couple of days ago there was still some doubt here but it's disappeared. It has been seen.

Fair play to you my Ecuadorian friend from your very grateful Irish friend - perhaps we'll meet one day In Ireland or even Ecuador!

Many thanks.

[Jorge786]

Niall, you have spoken well and fluid, you do not know how glad I am to "see you" on "this side". (you know there is no "sides").
Realizations and revelations are to me a constant, no words can be so great to describe such simplicity and there is happiness to freely share with you, because if you tell that to someone "before" the gate, the mind usually transform that into something else. I think I understand everyone of your words.

Ireland ... mmmm, I do not know, maybe some day, no one knows what will happen ... oh well... that's interesting too!... and if you want to visit Ecuador, you know... "mi casa es tú casa"

There is a final block of formal questions I should ask you, I would be very pleased if you wanted to answer them.
here they are:
1) Is there a 'me', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?
2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, When it starts and how it works.
3) How does it feel to see this? described in detail.
4) How would you describe it to somebody who has never heard about this illusion but is curious about it.
5) What was the last bit That pushed you over, made ​​you look? was there a specific moment when to seeing happened or was it gradual? what exactly happened?

Big hug
Jorge

[niall]

Hi Jorge,

Really glad to answer the following questions.

1) Is there a 'me', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?[/quote]

No, there is no me at all anywhere, in any shape or form. All there ever was were sensations/feelings and thoughts arising in emptiness, the idea that this was 'me' was simply another thought arising.

-

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, When it starts and how it works.

The illusion of self appears to happen very early in life - a very young baby knows nothing of thoughts or ideas or concepts. However, quite soon due to its environment and the other apparent people around the baby constantly pointing to it's body and referring to it as 'me' or 'mine' or 'yours' identification takes place and from here on in 'I' exist as a separate individual. That's it Jorge, nothing more to be said.

3) How does it feel to see this? described in detail.

OK Jorge, the major thing that's been realised is that it's all OK - no bliss, no everlasting happiness and no eternal joy, but a very real knowing that it is all OK - how could it not be, it's just what is happening, there is nothing outside this - simple.

5) What was the last bit That pushed you over, made ​​you look? was there a specific moment when to seeing happened or was it gradual? what exactly happened?

I have to say it was definitely a gradual realisation. Jorge, I had done so much spiritual seeking over the years that I had all kinds of idiotic ideas about what waking up meant or what liberation meant.
If there was a specific moment perhaps it was waking up in bed a few days ago and feeling a lot of pain and confusion and then the realisation came - this is LIFE feeling pain and confusion - why would I be worried about it!!! It's been clear here from that realisation on.

4) How would you describe it to somebody who has never heard about this illusion but is curious about it

OK, as mentioned above, as a small baby, perhaps between 24 and 30-months-old people around you insist on pointing to the baby body and calling it 'you' or 'me' or 'mine'. After this behavior is constantly repeated
awareness seems to congeal or form around the idea that there is in fact something that is separate from awareness - this thing is called self - but it is a lie.

thanks again Jorge.

[Jorge786]

Hi Niall

Thank you for the responses

other guide has questions for you

how do you see now the teachings of Brian Long and Tony Parsons?.
what are your feelings about your ex-partner now?

by my side, the list of "formal questions" have been extended without my noticing, sorry about that, so here they are:

6) When you say "I" Referring to what are you?
7) Is there an experiencer experiencing, or is there only experience?
8) Actually look. Does experience belong to the body, or the body does belong to experience?
9) What did you experience at the moment you awoke?
10) Describe your experience in the hours and days Following awakening.

thank you
Jorge

[niall]

Hi Jorge,

Glad to answer your additional questions:

how do you see now the teachings of Brian Long and Tony Parsons?.
what are your feelings about your ex-partner now?

Ha, great I get to 'dis' my former 'teachers'. No, only joking! Looking at it now Barry Long was completely deluded and rather mad to go with it - he once told me that a constellation of stars were going to be formed in the heavens when 'he' died. Apparently he got this information from some guy who brought Buddhism to Japan hundreds of years ago (this happened when he was meditating!).
He also believed that the only way man could ever know his true nature was through 'proper' sexual union with woman - what the fuck has that got to do with the sheer wonder of life after the believe in a separate self has been removed?

Tony Parsons teaching on the other hand is really spot on.Tony was the only teacher that could get the concept of no-self through to me in a completely clear way - but this wasn't enough for realisation to come about.
I believe Tony could greatly benefit his sincere communication by adapting a more direct pointing approach, but of course, he'll only tell you that there is no one there who could adapt a direct pointing approach and he's right - life itself does the looking, or the decision not to look.

My feelings now on my ex-partner are that she is still a selfish bitch - but it couldn't be any other way.

6) When you say "I" Referring to what are you?

A body mind orgamism

7) Is there an experiencer experiencing, or is there only experience?

There is definitely only experience.

8) Actually look. Does experience belong to the body, or the body does belong to experience?

The body and this whole manifestation belong to experience.

9) What did you experience at the moment you awoke?

Language is a strange medium, but it's all we got. Bit wary of terms like 'the moment you a woke' A few days ago there was an experience of complete emptiness which was stunning, but stunning experiences happened before and didn't lead to seeing no-self. If a moment has to be nominated it was a feeling of okay-ness and that it couldn't be any other way, which occurred several days ago in the middle of the night.

10) Describe your experience in the hours and days Following awakening.

As above - feelings of it being OK, life is OK no matter what is occurring. There have also been moments of awe at the beautiful simplicity of the whole thing. There have also been moments of wondering 'how did this 'I' manage to fuck the whole thing up so much?' Also feelings that more will be revealed.

thanks Jorge.

[niall]

Just to add Jorge, it is also noted that feelings seem to be more real - there is just the feelings minus a lot of the story that used to go with them - this is what is meant by feeling 'more will be revealed' - life is more real.

[Jorge786]

Ok, thank you, I will call the attention of the other guides on your answers

The intent of these questions is to clarify any matter that appears is not clear.
do you have any questions?
(no, I do not know who really killed Kennedy ;-) )