It seems close but yet so far

[Luchana]

Great!

Looking forward.

Much love,
Luchana

[CuriousBeing]

Recognition is spontanious, but does recognition implies someone?

In experience it just happens.

What if there is just recognising?

This is the case in experience.

The beleif is that there must be something or someone to recognize.
But is this so in reality?

There are only sights, sounds, sensations, tastes and thought. Seeing this, why then do I still get confused and believe there is a me?

What if recognition happen spontaniusly to no one?

Yes in experience this is the case. The mind tries to explain it.

Who or what can start or stop identification with a thougth?

Nothing is found in experience. Frustrating.

Look Is there something? Something solid, real?

Nothing can be found.

Do these feelings belong to someone?

No they are just happening and the mind explains why.

Can the character chooses what to feel, what to think, whether go for a walk or not?

No, this all just happens.

Does the character choose this story?

No. It plays out and is experienced.

Can it chooses another story, a different one, instead of what already is?

No it cannot.

Can the story of Simon be seen as what it is - just a story, including Simon?

I'll sit with this some more but no it cannot as it's just happening. Mind tries to keep track of it and make sense of it to protect the body.

A lot of frustration and anger as I feel a lot of effort is being made yet seeing doesn't occur. It is said that it just happens but then why do I look? If the realization is something that just happens, how do my actions make it happen? I feel like it's staring me in the face but I'm too caught up trying to rationalize it in the mind.

Thanks again Luchana

[Luchana]

Hi Simon,

Yes in experience this is the case. The mind tries to explain it.

No they are just happening and the mind explains why.

I'll sit with this some more but no it cannot as it's just happening. Mind tries to keep track of it and make sense of it to protect the body.

I appreciate you desire to solve the riddle. But by thinking is not going to work. Intellect is comletely usesless here.
It is very, very simple. Often it seems complicated because we get used that things should be complicated. And we need to use our intellect t But this is not the case.

Now look diectly, the way you are looking at the screen and reading these words.

What is mind when it is observed here now?

How mind shows up at experience?

Is there something called mind in reality?

What is real? A thougjt that there is a mimd, Or a mind?

What can a thought do?

Look vigilant, like a howk.

Much love,
Luchana

[CuriousBeing]

It seems I was not ready to see and needed the space to come back to it. I hope you are well, Luchana. I don't expect a quick reply and I'll ponder your pointings some more in the meantime!

What is mind when it is observed here now?

The mind is a thought. There is no mind directly experienced.

How mind shows up at experience?

As a thought. "There is a mind and that's why you can say that's a chair and that's a car! The mind exists!" is what thoughts say. If not seen to be thoughts then there is a belief in something called a mind.

Is there something called mind in reality?

No there isn't :)!

What is real? A thougjt that there is a mimd, Or a mind?

Thoughts are real, the mind is what they make up.

What can a thought do?

A thought appears and then disappears. Following the thoughts isn't possible but they are seen as being here and then leaving.

The last few days I've been checking out Ilona's book Liberation Unleashed and something felt different when I really looked for the "I sensation". That feeling which makes things feel personal, when explored it is seen as an illusion and everything remains without the heaviness. The mind is seen to reject this and that is also seen. I wonder if all I need to do is keep going back to it until it is dropped or if there is some fear which remains?

Your guidance is appreciated.

[Luchana]

Hi Simon,

so happy to hear from you!

It seems I was not ready to see and needed the space to come back to it. I hope you are well, Luchana. I don't expect a quick reply and I'll ponder your pointings some more in the meantime!

Yea, it can happen like that and it is common, resistance is showing up in so many different forms. But now you are here :-)

The last few days I've been checking out Ilona's book Liberation Unleashed and something felt different when I really looked for the "I sensation". That feeling which makes things feel personal, when explored it is seen as an illusion and everything remains without the heaviness. The mind is seen to reject this and that is also seen. I wonder if all I need to do is keep going back to it until it is dropped or if there is some fear which remains?

Beautiful! I can almost sense the relief ...tell me more.

Can you say more about this?
How the shift itself felt?
Also - does still seaking going on?
Are there any doubts?
What are you responsible for?


Sending much love,
Luchana

[CuriousBeing]

Can you say more about this?

What more can be said? A sudden feeling of relief from the heaviness and pressure of a "me". Now it is a thought that comes up telling me what it is like to be without a self..

How the shift itself felt?

A dropping of a doer. Relief that everything just is.

Also - does still seaking going on?

Yes. The feeling of a me remains but it is seen as a feeling. I was expecting a sudden dropping of self, angels singing and bliss all around but nothing of the sort.

Are there any doubts?

They are seen as thoughts and sensations. Focusing on the sensations leads to fear. A 'blocking' sensation in the chest.

What are you responsible for?

Things happen but there is still attachment to them. "I am seeing the hand move" and that is seen as a thought, then a sensation and that is also experienced. The feeling of an experiencer remains. Something here which experiences life.


Thank you for responding so quickly and if I'm rushing with this please let me know. Simon is seen as a story that is believed and is let go but there is still a pull into it sometimes. When arguments happen or the egoic need to say something is strong then there is a pulling into the drama. It is all witnessed but there is still a feeling of a me doing all of it... Frustrating indeed. Maybe I am putting too much effort in looking for something which cannot be found.

[Luchana]

Hi Simon,

They are seen as thoughts and sensations. Focusing on the sensations leads to fear. A 'blocking' sensation in the chest.

Thank you for sharing this with me. It’s important because fear can be a hindrance of going further. But actually, fear is nothing more than a protective mechanism, and it does its job well. Now, let's take a closer look at this.
Sit somewhere quietly and notice that you are in a secure environment- no real danger is here.

Look at the raw sensation called fear and just let it be here. Find where in the body is being felt, bring it closer, invite it to share its wisdom. It's fine to just let it be. It is protecting something from being found out. It is a sensation.
Feel it, respect it and you can even say "Thank you, fear for protecting me". Don’t try to fix it or solve it, just sit with it.

Look very closely. This fear suggests something. It tells a story.

What is this fear about?


What is the ‘negative’ story, what would happen?

[/i]Observe what images and stories come up ‘justifying’ its right to fear.

If you ignore the stories (thoughts) and mental images what is BEHIND the fear?


Let me know what you find.

Much love,
Luchana

[CuriousBeing]

What is this fear about? What is the ‘negative’ story, what would happen?

The fear is seen as a sensation and goes away.

Observe what images and stories come up ‘justifying’ its right to fear.

They are seen, allowed to be and they move on.

If you ignore the stories (thoughts) and mental images what is BEHIND the fear?

What remains is everything. Then thoughts that there must be more and that I'm missing something. These are seen as thoughts and allowed to move on. I question the existence of a doer and it feels like there is more of an opening and space. Yet still no shift. Everything is questioned and experienced so I cannot be that yet there is no realization. The mind is still and everything flows but no change. Thoughts about the future still cause anxiety and pull me in, there is no detachment to it all..

[Luchana]

Hi Simon,

What remains is everything. Then thoughts that there must be more and that I'm missing something. These are seen as thoughts and allowed to move on. I question the existence of a doer and it feels like there is more of an opening and space. Yet still no shift. Everything is questioned and experienced so I cannot be that yet there is no realization. The mind is still and everything flows but no change. Thoughts about the future still cause anxiety and pull me in, there is no detachment to it all..

Beautiful!

Can you see the story "that there must be more and that I'm missing something" is also a story?


Is thought an independent entity with volition to cause anxiety and pull?

And what is this EXACTLY which is being pulled in?

In of what precisely?



If you want we can meet via zoom, and look together?


Much love,
Luchana