There is and has never been a Luce.

[Luce]

Reading your questions the feeling is right there, the pureness, right there,

The mind is a cage. EVERYTHING is being suppressed. It wants to be free, oh god it wants to be free.

[Luce]

It's retreated a little now. Luce has deadlines, there is work to be done. Water to carry, wood to chop as it were :)

smile, and see how these parts in you are simply playing out in exactly this way?

I see this. The unique conditioning of this unique mind means that unfolding is happening in the only way it could. But there is nothing to rush, no-one to rush it. Intellectually, I understand that this will unfold into seeing things as they always have been, but this is not visceral right now.

And what if the work was never the point?
What if the deepest meaning is found only in the joy itself — like singing in the shower, without an audience, without a goal?

This resonates now when it did not before. The writing I did this morning would have been frustrating previously, trying to piece complex ideas together. Today, the complexity and the figuring out were joyful. I don't have to tell myself to find the joy in it, the joy is just there.

Look at the mind — it’s just a role we’re playing, isn’t it?
A contraction — trying to fit into an idea of what we are, what we should be?

This was so obvious earlier but fading now. The mind is tricky, it's like it's trying to help but its attempts to conceptualise this visceral understanding just make the understanding recede, and keep the illusion of separation in place.

Peacefully,
Luce

[Lubo]

I am with you

the pureness, right there,

Notice that this purity is manifesting exactly this picture in front of you.
You are manifesting this body, this moment, this entire scene — right now?

Is there truly anything to fear in life?
Notice how lovable this entire phenomenon is — all of it, just for you?

See this, and the projections of fear will dissolve.

The mind is a cage. EVERYTHING is being suppressed. It wants to be free, oh God, it wants to be free.

Beautiful.

Notice what you truly are, that is enjoying manifesting all of this.

See that you are pure…
but also a little kinky, playful, wild?
Find peace in the knowing that you hold infinite aspects within you —
and the picture will always fit you.

So much love,
Lubo

[Luce]

Oh Lubo, it's so close. I feel like everything is on the verge of turning inside out.

Notice that this purity is manifesting exactly this picture in front of you.
You are manifesting this body, this moment, this entire scene — right now?

Eating my breakfast, the exquisite detail of everything, the swirl of raspberry in yoghurt, texture, the sensation of hand on spoon, the sound of spoon on bowl. So much detail right here, right now, that's everything.
But also really seeing that the mind is labelling, labelling all the time. I had a linseed on my tongue. But it's just an exquisite sensation. It's only a 'linseed' and a 'tongue' because the mind is labelling. It's just that sensation right now, nothing else, just that, it's all there is, it's more than enough. It's only a 'taste' because the mind labels it. It's just a sensation. I touched my face. But it's only a 'hand' 'touching' a 'face' because the mind labels it so.

Notice what you truly are, that is enjoying manifesting all of this.

The expanded feeling is right there, love, joy, without effort. So close to really seeing that these sensations are shimmers in eternity, something vast playing. That it is all one. But the mind hasn't yet let go, that final letting go that will free me, unify me. The mind can't contain this much longer...

Thank you Lubo, thank you.

[Lubo]

So beautiful, dear Luce,

Eating my breakfast, the exquisite detail of everything — the swirl of raspberry in yoghurt, the texture, the sensation of hand on spoon, the sound of spoon on bowl. So much detail right here, right now, that's everything.

Wow, yes. That is the experience we call breakfast.
But notice — are you that?

I touched my face. But it's only a 'hand' 'touching' a 'face' because the mind labels it so.

Yes. It’s so beautiful to see — a hand touches a face, yet you are neither the hand nor the face.

The expanded feeling is right there, love, joy, without effort. So close to really seeing that these sensations are shimmers in eternity, something vast playing. That it is all one. But the mind hasn't yet let go, that final letting go that will free me, unify me. The mind can't contain this much longer...

Yes — you are vast, playful, and free.

Let’s gently turn toward this “final letting go.”
What holds you in its grip?
What is it that feels more powerful than you?
What is it that keeps you from being fully you —
from being free?
Share with me.

Love,
With you,
Lubo

[Luce]

But notice — are you that?

I don't know. I think the sense of separation (mostly) dissolved in the experience. There was a not an experiencer and an experience, just pure sensation. I don't know if that was 'me'.

What holds you in its grip?

I think there are two things, conditioning and, still, some fear.

For so long, I have experienced separation. It stills feels at some level like there is a 'me' in here and stuff out there. This morning's experience was as close as I have been to seeing this as an illusion rather than understanding it intellectually. THe conditioning is still holding, just about.

Fear about how I will function when the sense of separation dissolves. Will I still be able to pull back from it? Right now, the expanded feeling and the bubbling joy is there at some level all the time, which is different to yesterday. I think I could sink into that whenever I wanted, but I can withdraw from it too. Eg I just went to an online training session and took in info and asked questions like I was still Luce. I don't know if this is because I still feel separate. It's hard to express. People can obviously still function in the world (whatever that means - a conversation for later) once they are free and one. Life kept happening once I saw through the experience of Luce. The Luce character functioned in the world. But this feels so much more fundamental than that. Will I spend days lost in the wonder. Will I scare my wife? I appreciate that there are lots of contradictions in here, I'm just writing as it comes.

But the pathless path has been positive and joyful so far. I have to trust the path and you. I do trust you to guide me, unreservedly, Lubo.

What is it that feels more powerful than you?

I don't know what 'me' is. This power is within me. Intrinsic to me. The wave still thinks at some level that it is separate to the ocean. That me and awareness are not one.

What is it that keeps you from being fully you —
from being free?

I think it is the conditioning and the fear but it also feels like the dam is about to burst. Seeing that Luce did not and had never existed was just a step to the side. No triumphant enlightenment. Seeing things as they always had been. And I know this is the same. I'm longing to see things as they are and always have been. This is the conditioning that was underpinning the idea of self. There could never have been a Luce without that fundamental sense of 'in here' and 'out there', which is still enduring even with no persona in here.

It's getting from the intellectual acceptance to really seeing what can never be unseen.

I'm not even going to read this back, I'm just going to send it.

[Luce]

There is no going back once I pass through this gateless gate.

[Lubo]

Hi dear Luce,

I see what you’re concerned about — this awakening is liberation, and it will make your wife even happier than she is now.
What’s happening is exactly what you truly want.
Everything you’ve ever felt missing in life will come to you.
You’ll discover that this beauty is your own lucid dream.

I think the sense of separation (mostly) dissolved in the experience.

Not quite — there are actually two kinds of experiences.
Look closely:
1. One is the 5-senses experience — let’s call it “breakfast on a sunny morning”.
Later, it becomes “dinner on a rainy evening”.
Notice how these are two distinct sensory experiences. But you are not them.
Look around — does the 5-senses experience called “day” know itself?
Wake up!

2.The second experience is your own — infinite, vast, pure.

Let’s play with this:

I just went to an online training session and took in info and asked questions like I was still Luce.

I want you to become aware of the words you want to say throughout the day.
And when you notice them before they are spoken, see that you have the freedom to choose not to say them, not to act in the “Luce” way.
Feel the freedom in that — the freedom to say nothing at all.

Notice, too, that what feels like fear… is actually excitement — the excitement of freedom.

You are pure.

With love,
Lubo

[Luce]

Oh God, I am the pureness, the joy, the expanse. It is all within me.

[Luce]

Are we sharing the same lucid dream Lubo?

[Lubo]

Oh God, I am the pureness, the joy, the expanse. It is all within me.

:)

Yes, I am in your dream.
You appear as everyone here.
There is only you.

Notice the FREEDOM —
to not be anyone,
to be nobody,
to not act?

And then… you are the guru of everyone and everything.
Can you see this?

1. Notice how the "sleep" begins — it starts with acting, with identification with the body. Let this become your alarm signal!

2. Notice where you place your attention — this is where the unfolding begins.

Love,
Lubo

[Luce]

Hi Lubo

Luce has been really busy for the last week. Awareness is unfolding slowly, sleepily! I'm going on holiday for the next two weeks. I will try to NOTICE while I am on holiday, and I look forward to carrying on with this conversation when I get back.

Love & gratitude
Luce

[Lubo]

Hi dear Luce,
I found radically direct way to realize what the wake up is.

And this is exactly for your holiday.
Play and

Let's check now how powerful you really are?

Shift this: Your life is not a tragedy, it’s an erotic film.
You are Eros itself—the director of every scene.
You appear as this body, yes—but also as all the others.
You are not just the actor—you are the director playing the actor, discovering her/him-self.
Stay for a while with that.
How does that feel? :)

Are you ready to wake up from the dream of being "someone"—once and for all?

If yes, then:

Calm the mind. Invite it gently to play. Show it this is not a dangerous world. You are appearing here by Grace—in an erotic movie—just to realize you are God, Eros itself.

Look at this body—your body.
Feel the hand as it touches the face—how intimate, how tenderly erotic?

And gently notice: you are not just that. You are the one quietly enjoying this experience, with wonder, from within the movie?
Say something now. Listen: how does the voice appear in the film?
Sing a song—feel how the very sound is erotic?
Feel the breath. Isn’t it an erotic experience?
Look at the people walking in the street—how beautifully they move, how perfectly they exist in your film?


Feel your anger—your power. Use it. Let it change the character you’re playing. Let it reshape the whole movie to your taste.

See even the dangerous people—how serious they are in their roles. Isn't that both funny and deeply erotic?
Don't look at the perspective of the role/body you are playing but from perspective to be the Director?

I imagine you’re doing all this as I say it.
So now I ask you:

Who are you—really?
Are you this body?
Are you the story?
Are you born or the movie just appear in you in this very moment exactly as it is , exactly as this scene right now , human is reading this erotic letter?

With so much love,
Lubo

[Lubo]

Hi Luce,
How is the holiday going?
Are you still with me?

Love,
Lubo

[Luce]

Hi Lubo

My holiday was great thanks. I just enjoyed it as Luce.

Yes, I am in your dream.
You appear as everyone here.
There is only you.

I'm encountering some confusion and resistance.

I see that there is only me in the sense that I am indivisble from consciousness, that everything and everyone is a manifestation of consciousness.

I've been reading some Rupert Spira on the nature of reality. He says:

'Each of us is a localisation of consciousness, numerous separate subjects of experience in consciousness’s imagination, through whose agency consciousness sees the unified field of its own mind simultaneously from numerous different vantage points as an apparent multiplicity and diversity of objects.'

Are you saying something different to that or saying the same thing in a different way?

Notice the FREEDOM —
to not be anyone,
to be nobody,
to not act?

Is this freedom in the sense that there is no me, no free will, no control? The freedom of surrendering to that? It reads like there is freedom to CHOOSE not to act but there is no-one to make any choice or exert any control. Everything is just happening. But I think I'm still clinging to the idea that at some level I'm in control of some of it in some way.