Help would be appreciated

[Pangurban]

Dear Lubo

No need to fight with the mind.

Probably that’s what I’m guilty of doing.

drop it in the basket

This is the hard part.

I am keeping at it, Lubo.

Best
Claudia

[Lubo]

Hi dear Claudia,

I understand that my advisees make you feel that you should do something and this brings uncomfortable experience.
I want you to know that my advices and pointing are to feel freedom!
to drop every effort , even "to drop" sounds like an effort.

let's do it together.
Ramana (if you are familiar with this nondual teacher) says "" Know that I am God" and not "Think that I am God"
So, thoughts are not God, no need to think about that you just know that, right? :)

Let's follow this advice! we are investigating from knowing but not thinking.
Are you here? How far is you from this very moment?
1km/mile?
is there distance at all?

So, you are here and This Beauty here is playing under your"nouse" so to speak :)

Now notice is there something which is not exactly what it is:
Colours and shape appear as room?

Body?

Body sensations?

Thoughts and chair - here?

A me/you/self and 10 billion dollars in the room?

Me, persona, women, daughter...where is she?

Feel the freedom in you.
enjoy freedom

Love lubo

[Pangurban]

Dear Lubo

So this afternoon I sat with all you wrote. There was nature, grass, trees, wind on the skin, bells of farm animals, people talking, thoughts too. but no, no me there. there’s no distance in this experience either.

Something’s occurred to me. It’s all real, but that I, no. Not real. something just went „ohhh“ at this. Something wants to cry but it’s not ready yet.

I‘ll be taking this into the night.

Thanks for your patience
Claudia

[Lubo]

Hi dear Claudia,
Beautiful!

I can share with you some suggestions, and of course the reality is already what is and they are just things for play:
1. In the morning, in the first moment when you realize that the morning is here, just before the eyes open, notice, are you in this beautiful thing that arises as morning?
Including female body, animals, sky...everything is the visual field

2. Breathwork - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YDUUD0DBj2k
When the mind is busy with something it is easy to notice the thoughts
and
what really is here

Is there any persona/individual here?

So much love to you,
Lubo

[Pangurban]

Dear Lubo

Thank you for these suggestions. I will try number 1. The breathwork is beautiful. I find working with the breath very powerful and it has become part of my practice. The last few days, however, I‘ve been travelling and no quiet space to myself. Now back at home I gave this one a try.
Back hone things are settling back into their routine.

The persona keeps coming back when I‘m busy. Am getting entangled into it until I see it. Actually, the more I investigate lately, the firmer it seems to get at times. Even strong doubt seems to come up the past few days. And when things are relaxed it‘s the opposite. There seems to be more clarity. So osciliating. As before.

Seeing believes coming up, too. Attachement to the persona. Things I journal about and investigate.

Love
Claudia

[Lubo]

Hi dear Claudia,
Notice that breathwork helps this fighting energies in us to soften?
Now let's do that without any practise.
When you are ready.
First notice that you are safe?
Then notice the fighting energies - allow them to soften for 1 min even.

Then look with the eyes of God looking the garden of Eden - what is this beauty around?
You God just cannot recognise what is this and what you are .
This is not your fault, nobody told you that.
Snake or rope - this is real dangerous life or Garden of Eden?
Look with the eyes of the supreme love <3

So much love to you,
Lubo

[Pangurban]

Good evening dear Lubo

Notice that breathwork helps this fighting energies in us to soften?

Absolutely. And it is like a garden of Eden when the energies soften. Things are suddenly so beautiful. It‘s been more quiet and gentle today.

When fears come back up, or resistance, I will be with whatever is. Seems like every day is different on this journey.

Warm wishes
Claudia

[Lubo]

wow Claudia,
you just crash the Gate
look what you notice:

Seems like every day is different on this journey.

Notice that something is here , which is stable and in it different days appear?

This is it.
Stay here. Notice what is coming when you are not identifying with an experience, with day, with what is going on now?
Notice how vast you are that everything appear and moves in you?
Notice that everything is known?
Because you are here?
Whose realisation is that, to the life energy wich appear as day wich include everything?
or to the beign that you are not what is found?

Notice that something should be here in order all this to be known?

Check:
Do know what is going on on planet Mars right now?
Why?
:)

[Pangurban]

Notice that something is here , which is stable and in it different days appear?

Yes, I do.

Notice what is coming when you are not identifying with an experience, with day, with what is going on now?

I feel the "little me stirings" but I see through them quickly. There's habits and attachements that pop up, like earlier in a meeting but they were recognised fast.

Notice how vast you are that everything appear and moves in you?

Yes, that I "see" or experience, more stable.

Notice that everything is known?

To be honest, I feel like I know nothing. ;-) There is more a certainty of something that is always here.

To me it feels like an apple that needs to ripen a bit (to stay with your garden of Eden).

[Lubo]

Hi dear Claudia,

I feel the "little me stirings" but I see through them quickly. There's habits and attachements that pop up, like earlier in a meeting but they were recognised fast.

Notice that all these are known and you are sharing that effortlessly.
Let's see is there real little me:
Notice the body and label it with "My body"
then "My sensations, My thoughts,
My room,
My sky,
Notice the whole picture in visual field "My experience"
"My everything"
Notice how do you feel to be big, to own everything?

And notice that only thoughts makes division in everything which is yours?

I is there little me at all?

Notice that you are not what you own?
Mmm, who/what are you?

Love,
Lubo

[Pangurban]

Hello dear Lubo

Notice that all these are known and you are sharing that effortlessly.

Yes, I do. They are known more easily and there is far less or no identification with it. when there is, it's seen through quickly.

Notice how do you feel to be big, to own everything?

I see this. When the mental struggle comes back, feelings pass through, it's like it is just going through "me".

Let's see is there real little me:
Notice the body and label it with "My body"
then "My sensations, My thoughts,
My room,
My sky,
Notice the whole picture in visual field "My experience"
"My everything"
Notice how do you feel to be big, to own everything?

To say "My body", "My sensations", "My thoughts"... at this stage it feels odd. I think the way you put it describes it well: too big to "own" it. The rest I've never seen as mine and I can't say I feel too big... :-) It feels more like it arises within "me", but not the little self (there is none). It's more the big Self.

who/what are you?

Well, not my body, not my thoughts, not my feelings. ;-) When I look there is nothing, everything. It's a bit beyond words to be honest.

There's a left over fear of this not being it. Of little me coming back or falling for the illusion again. Of "spirtual bypassing" and lack of authenticity. The ego is so good at putting on a show of "anything self", including "spirtual self". I guess that's why I said, I need this apple to ripen. At the same time this is more clearer than before and I don't see the one who doubts and I can see that this fear is just a "thought" or a feeling.

Best,
Claudia

[Lubo]

Hi dear Claudia,
Please notice that there is no self already!
me persona cannot become God, there is just no me persona.
Are you OK with that?
If yes notice:

Notice that all these are known and you are sharing that effortlessly.

Yes, I do. They are known more easily and there is far less or no identification with it. when there is, it's seen through quickly

.

To whom identification belongs to? - to the me persona? :)

I see this. When the mental struggle comes back, feelings pass through, it's like it is just going through "me".

Ok. You know that there is not something which belongs to the persona.
Notice when struggle is coming, be in the center of the storm and feel how vital, alive, erotic even is that wich is passing in you, God?

The rest I've never seen as mine and I can't say I feel too big... :-)

yes, because someone told you that you are the body and separation seemingly appear.
Now notice that there is no persona already, This visual field belongs to whom?

for the practical level there is recognition that there is a tree and cheese and tree cannot be eaten. But notice that this separation is not real, everything is the visual field and tree and cheese and body?
Now invitation is to own the whole picture but not the body eating cheese only.
Notice the freedom to find that body is not separate from the rest One event, one experience?
No need to protect the body from the rest because rest is the same, everything is yours, notice the relief in the sistem?
Is there a me in the picture or there is only what appear there including the body?

There's a left over fear of this not being it. Of little me coming back or falling for the illusion again. Of "spirtual bypassing" and lack of authenticity. The ego is so good at putting on a show of "anything self", including "spirtual self". I guess that's why I said, I need this apple to ripen. At the same time this is more clearer than before and I don't see the one who doubts and I can see that this fear is just a "thought" or a feeling.

Yes, you are God at the cinema, feel the fear and notice that this is live energy?
that this is excitement actually?
and only thoughts are labelling as fear?
beautiful excitement of this divine show,
notice what is to find that?
Just this excitement is shamed by someone and now thoughts are labelling this beautiful energy as dangerous and wrong and shouldn't be here.

Love ,
Lubo

[Pangurban]

Dear Lubo

for the practical level there is recognition that there is a tree and cheese and tree cannot be eaten. But notice that this separation is not real, everything is the visual field and tree and cheese and body?
Now invitation is to own the whole picture but not the body eating cheese only.

Let's do this. I have no cheese, but a glass container here on the table that contains fruit. The mind says, the fruit is separate and can be eaten , but not the glass container. From visual experience, however, it is all one. It is also one with the desk, And it's in the same field of awareness as feeling inside that arise and thoughts that arise. Inside and outside = same.
When I recognise / describe this, something inside drops away (like a contraction) and there is relieve. I can hear a car passing outside and it's like the sound goes through me.

Is there a me in the picture or there is only what appear there including the body?

Status remains the same. When I look, I can't find the me. Yet in everyday life there's labeling and illusion, it's becoming weaker but that's still the experience that keeps coming back - until I look / become aware. I feels at time like a cat and mouse game, still.

now thoughts are labelling this beautiful energy as dangerous and wrong and shouldn't be here.

Hm yes. more labeling. absolutely.

The exploration continues....

Best,
Claudia

[Lubo]

Wow, Claudia
beautiful exploration!

And it's in the same field of awareness as feeling inside that arise and thoughts that arise. Inside and outside = same.

yes inside and outside from what :)?, and yes there is such experience but are you an experience?

Now notice the expectation that we can find ourself IN or AS what is found?
Body, sensation, thoughts, taste....to be IN and OUT become something separate...

Let's found this wich we can find for us and to identify with it.

Invite thoughts to play with you, tell to them Let's find the vast God in the silence
Notice in the moment of quietness the vast God's presence, without which nothing can be known?
This is you, identify with it.
And "from here" notice is there a time?
Is there someone else doing things to happen?
Someone separate from God who should take care about something?
Notice the relief? that everything is coming from You, from God's heart including thoughts and they will relax?

Love,
Lubo

[Pangurban]

Hi Lubo 🌞

yes inside and outside from what

"in and out" is more for purpose of language and refering more to what mind sees to be inside and outside the body (not "me")

Notice in the moment of quietness the vast God's presence, without which nothing can be known?
This is you, identify with it..

God's presence -> there are other names used for this, right? awake awareness? Is it also the "I am" sense? Because thats exactly what it feels like when it's not obscured. Not the "little me" sense of course, much broader, like i've tried to describe.

And "from here" notice is there a time?
Is there someone else doing things to happen?

No, not here. But then things start up again and the mind gets obscured.


The investigations are helpful. Thank you for your time and patience. 😊

♥
Claudia