Hi Elad,
I just did the exercise while on a bus to NYC. It was interesting! I enjoyed noticing experience a lot more without the label “I.” I felt like there was less judgement . For example, instead of saying “I feel nauseous” just saying “nauseated” took the personal infliction away. I don’t think the labels really change the experience but it did feel more limiting to say”I” with everything. I did notice something quite interesting when writing the second time and really sticking to my present experience… I would notice something like an ache in my leg and by the time I went to write about it, it was gone and then I realized it was no longer my true experience to write about because to write it down would be to re-live the past. Does that make sense? I noticed how rapidly sensations and things around me are changing. Thanks so much for the exercise.
Beautiful, this is all very clear good attending. This noticing that descriptions are after the fact can be an entrance point to go through the gateless gate. Any time you are aware of it (not thinking about it, but experiencing it), let it sink in and be curious about:
1) What does that tell me about the the thoughts I have about the world and myself?
2) Is there a self or separation in direct experience prior to labeling?
Please also do this exercise, made by a fellow guide named Stacy. When she speaks about truth and lies here, she is not speaking about what is conventionally "objectively true", but about the state of truthfulness - which is key in this investigation:
We often lie every day & don't realize it.
For example, the grocery clerk asks, "How are you?" You reply, "I'm fine." While, yes. there is a sense in which we are always fine, even in the middle of suffering, at that moment, you were grieving the death of your dog, you had a slight sore throat & you had a headache, but you didn't feel like sharing all of that with the grocery clerk, so you lied, "I'm fine."
Also, it matters none at all how "distant" the remembered lie is. Besides the fact that time itself is fictional, a kind if lie, as we recall the lie it becomes present in this moment, as if it were happening now. This brings the body Sensation that accompanies lying.
Lies can be intentional or unintentional, conscious or unconscious, even so automatic that we ourselves are fooled.
The story of a separate "self" is a lie.
This is the lie you came here to see through. Therefore, it is helpful to notice the body Sensation of lying as one of the tools for finding the truth of no self.
You want to be in touch with body Sensations & able to clearly express them in words. This will help.
Lies are usually felt in the heart or solar plexus as a contraction that we may label as tight, heavy or tense.
In contrast, truth is usually expansive. We may call it loose, light or relaxed.
First, can you remember a time when you lied to someone you loved?
Here we count anything, lies we think of as "big" or "small" that "matter" or don't "matter."
How are you? I'm fine. No, your knee hurts, but you don't feel like discussing it with the grocery clerk.
It's a lie. A seemingly "bigger" one will work better for this exercise.
Find the lie. I don't need the whole story, just a few key words to refer to it.
Then scan your body for any Sensation (DE or Direct Experience), particularly in the gut or maybe the heart. Check very closely.
What is found?
If you think the memory you used wasn't clear enough, find another one or lie to yourself right now, make something up.
1 + 1 = 14 is a lie.
I love eating worms is (probably) a lie.
Or call up a video of a lying politician & notice what Sensations arise as you listen.
I will give you a clue: it is not that peaceful Sensation you felt before when you omitted "I." (refers to an exercise I gave before this one)
Please report back with what body Sensations (not interpretations) you feel. Bodies can feel hot or cold, heavy or light, contraction or expansion, etc.
"Peaceful" is an interpretation of a body Sensation, not the Sensation itself, for example.
Do you see that?