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Re: To return home
Posted: Fri May 20, 2022 3:19 am
by Jstar
Hi Kento
The feeling is of a subject looking through the eyes out into the world. The subject is inside the body or as the body. There is solidity and heaviness felt in the body, as 'I am' walking, sitting, etc. The same feeling goes with breathing and eating. I am the one doing all these. The feeling of location or being a me, seems sometimes more around the face, shoulders and chest.
Thank you.
Re: To return home
Posted: Sun May 22, 2022 4:33 am
by Bananafish
Hi Jstar. :)
Please focus on that feeling, and see what makes that feeling
particularly a sort of "subject."
Warm regards,
Kento
Re: To return home
Posted: Mon May 23, 2022 10:00 am
by Jstar
Hi Kento
I found that thoughts make up a subject called I from the visual experience, sensations and images related to body.
The I is assumed to be a body. When eyes are open, it is assumed that this body is me. When I close my eyes, there are images of a body (face, shoulder, eyes looking out), sensations and intermittent thoughts in an open space. If I do not rely on thoughts, I cant find an I entity specifically. The label 'I' used in conversations and thoughts are unquestioned and taken to be a body or its image.
Thanks and best regards
Re: To return home
Posted: Mon May 23, 2022 12:28 pm
by Bananafish
Thanks! What about after knowing that?
Is there still any kind of feeling related to a separate entity that makes up a
subject?
Please be truly honest about this.
Warmly,
Kento
Re: To return home
Posted: Tue May 24, 2022 4:04 am
by Jstar
Hi Kento
As I looked, I found that the assumption in thought about a separate entity is based on the visual field. A separate body is very quickly assumed as a separate person, then categorised and judged - this process is so fast. The same happens in mind/thoughts (words and images). The assumption is this body is me.
The feeling associated with the separate entity is quick judgements like superiority/inferiority in comparison with 'others', justification/defence/guilt, sadness/loss, disappointment of certain expectations not met(fame, acceptance, ..), frustration that there is nowhere else to go, anger/rage/hate with certain people/situations etc.
Looking closely these are felt as energy building up in head, throat, chest, left side of the body and belly. When I allow it, it dissipates - taking hours/days.
thanks and regards
Re: To return home
Posted: Tue May 24, 2022 6:40 am
by Jstar
Hi Kento
Continuing my response from pervious post:
I also noticed the mechanism of feeling bad, assigning it a label (hate, anger, dont like it, not right...), a cause involving 'me and the other' (I did this, she did this...) is also a fast dynamic. On closer looking the beginning is a sensation (and perception) and then the rest is thoughts.
thanks
Re: To return home
Posted: Tue May 24, 2022 10:54 am
by Bananafish
Hi Jstar. :) Thank you. Maybe going a bit off track?
What exactly is it that relates all those to a separate entity that makes up a
subject? What makes that "subjectness"?
Warmly,
Kento
Re: To return home
Posted: Wed May 25, 2022 10:10 am
by Jstar
Hi Kento
I did not think I am going off track. I could not find anything other than what I described. Please help me with your question in different words if possible. Please help me with any other pointers/instructions that will help looking.
Thanks
Re: To return home
Posted: Wed May 25, 2022 11:57 am
by Bananafish
Ok, Jstar. Please point at yourself now. Where are you pointing at?
Warmly,
Kento
Re: To return home
Posted: Thu May 26, 2022 5:21 am
by Jstar
Hi Kento:)
No specific place to point to in particular. Nothing to be excluded too. It is everything.
Re: To return home
Posted: Thu May 26, 2022 11:29 am
by Bananafish
Hi Jstar. :)
It is everything.
Is this an intellectual or experiential understanding?
When you write a reply to this post, does your neighbor write a reply?
What is it that writes?
Warm regards,
Kento
Re: To return home
Posted: Fri May 27, 2022 4:38 am
by Jstar
Hi Kento
When you write a reply to this post, does your neighbour write a reply?
What is it that writes?
I am writing this reply to you. The way 'I' used here is as a way of speaking. When I look at this moment, I don't find a single entity replying (there are thoughts, sensations, seeing and so on). 'My neighbour' is a thought and the question whether he is replying or not can only be answered with more thoughts. I don't know the response to that without thoughts. As a way of speaking, I will say 'no'.
Is this an intellectual or experiential understanding?
I do not know the answer to whether this is intellectual or experiential. This was the original question we began with. I am not writing from concepts I have heard, it is from direct looking now.
Thank you and best regards
Re: To return home
Posted: Fri May 27, 2022 5:33 am
by Bananafish
Thanks, Jstar; let's focus a bit on the following question:
What is it that writes a reply?
Could you answer without saying there's no one answering?
Warm wishes,
Kento
Re: To return home
Posted: Fri May 27, 2022 5:35 am
by Bananafish
And also, could you, not "as a way of speaking," tell the answer based on
the direct looking now?
Re: To return home
Posted: Sat May 28, 2022 4:33 am
by Jstar
Hi Kento
Knowing/Experiencing/I am - thats all what it is.