Hi Luchana,
Focus in very much needed in this investigation, so willigness for everyday posting.
But you don't have to do this if you don't want, we can stop this in any time.
I do want to do this. i didn’t realize it was a requirement to post everyday. i felt the need to regroup for a few days after the triggers....will re-adjust. :)
Do you have an expectation that reactions and stuff will stop going on? Why would they? Emotional triggers, reactions will still happen
yes I did (although I know I shouldn’t). yet seeing there was no me....then having big reactions occur seemed to bring re-identification - brought on doubt, sadness, depression, and judgment of ‘myself’.
Losing those expectations...and seeing differently now.
The question here is - is there something or someone to whom they happen?
Have been spending much more time looking now since that happened....and sensing everything in a sense of an open field...rather than a body. like an alive, loving field. It’s all ok.
Everytime when it seems that there is a setback - pause for a minute and check:
Who or what is setting-back precisely?
Thank you.... will remember that. When I pause and inquire there is peace.
Most of your answers are not coming from looking and are too short It's like to are hurring to write the reply. But it is not going to work like this You need to do the work, Karen. You have to look, literally.
Although my answers were short, I did spend a lot of time looking. I thought short, simple answers were preferred in some direct questions. I do very much appreciate you letting me know where it is apparent answers were/are not from looking. :)
But what is this me? Let's find out.
How does it show up in experience when you observe it now in this very moment?
Right now...dejected feeling arising....but not identifying with it.
Don't just think about it, rather LOOK:
Extended Looking...seeing as one open field of knowing (by no one). there is a sense of okayness even with emotions arising. all in this field is equal....tv, dresser, bed, body, floor....all Love.
Can it be seen, traced back from where it has come?
the same knowing field was there when I was a child, in high school, and various other apparent times in life...all that is certain is there was a constant unchanging knowing or aware field.....so can’t be traced back from where it came.
When you find it - point to its precise location.
It seems similar to like being in a night dream, so no location.
Don't just think about it, rather LOOK:
It is like this room & everything here is in me, consciousness..along with this body, sensations and sounds happening. nowhere.
i apparently have lived in various cities, a different country, but don’t know if I actually went, or was, anywhere. just like travelling happens to different countries in my night time dreams....but I actually go nowhere - no time or distance....no world...just an appearance apparently happening.
Is there something here, something solid,
and how is it experienced exactly?
Feels less solid....like floating while lying on bed...in Consciousness.
Thank you, 💗
~Karen
