Hi Ilona,
Writing here with a request to be a volunteer guide.
Love
Steven
Not Being
Re: Not Being
Sweet :) as we discussed, can you write your answers to the final questions here.
1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?
2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it ufully as you see it now.
3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.
4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?
5) Can you talk about decision, intention, free will, choice and control? What makes things happen? How does it work? What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience.
6) Anything to add?
Please answer in full, when ready.
Much love.
1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?
2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it ufully as you see it now.
3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.
4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?
5) Can you talk about decision, intention, free will, choice and control? What makes things happen? How does it work? What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience.
6) Anything to add?
Please answer in full, when ready.
Much love.
See for yourself.
8-week guided self-inquiry experience → https://ilonaciunaite.com/8-week-program/
8-week guided self-inquiry experience → https://ilonaciunaite.com/8-week-program/
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Stevenisnow
- Posts: 10
- Joined: Tue Dec 10, 2019 6:07 pm
Re: Not Being
Hi Ilona :) Answers for the exam below! :))
1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?
A. No. Not now or ever.
2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.
A. The illusion of the separate self is the belief that there is an 'I' separate from life. It probably starts from a thought at a very young age 'Me- Not Me'. We then build up a fictional story of who we are composed of thoughts and feelings (memories- which are thoughts occurring in the present but we think are of the past and give a sense of continuity). From my own experience I identified my self as my body and some sort of 'sense of self' personality that seemed consistent throughout- the pilot behind the eyes. My story. Yet through inquiry I sought to find this 'self' but could not. I was not my name, not my thoughts, not my body. There was no self to find. Hence the illusion of the self. The only thing that is certain is that I AM. It is this I AM awareness that is always present. Thoughts and feelings arise within it and disappear but I AM remains untouched. No past, no future, no labels can contain it. Boundless. This is a felt sense of I AM.
3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.
A. In the past I would feel that I am a person. Steven can grow, develop, is born, will die. It was quite stressful sometimes as I would think about making myself secure, worry about financial security, think I am the body etc. Now the experience is one of relaxation, openness, allowing. The feeling is one of being like the space in which things can occur but what I AM is unperturbed. Always already here now. Peace, aliveness, an emptiness that is complete.
4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?
A. In a Deep Looking session I looked out over a cemetery from the window in a guest room. I saw only colour. No labels. A spacious awareness that had no boundaries and could not be labelled or contained. There was a disappearing of 'me' and all there was was this spaciousness and I knew myself as THAT.
5) Can you talk about decision, intention, free will, choice and control? What makes things happen? How does it work? What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience.
A. I used to think 'I' made decisions. Not I realise there is no doer. Life happens, breathing happens, decisions are made. All as one flow, complete, interdependent arising, not one mistake, no judgements of good or bad, no separation. I do not choose, choosing happens. I do not control. Instead there is a freshness and aliveness as life flows. Not to me but as me. I am life.
6) Anything to add?
A. This site has been a gift. Giving the final push through inquiry and the work with Ilona to end the search and to begin the enjoyment of consciousness knowing itself. Thank you to Ilona and all the team here.
1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?
A. No. Not now or ever.
2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.
A. The illusion of the separate self is the belief that there is an 'I' separate from life. It probably starts from a thought at a very young age 'Me- Not Me'. We then build up a fictional story of who we are composed of thoughts and feelings (memories- which are thoughts occurring in the present but we think are of the past and give a sense of continuity). From my own experience I identified my self as my body and some sort of 'sense of self' personality that seemed consistent throughout- the pilot behind the eyes. My story. Yet through inquiry I sought to find this 'self' but could not. I was not my name, not my thoughts, not my body. There was no self to find. Hence the illusion of the self. The only thing that is certain is that I AM. It is this I AM awareness that is always present. Thoughts and feelings arise within it and disappear but I AM remains untouched. No past, no future, no labels can contain it. Boundless. This is a felt sense of I AM.
3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.
A. In the past I would feel that I am a person. Steven can grow, develop, is born, will die. It was quite stressful sometimes as I would think about making myself secure, worry about financial security, think I am the body etc. Now the experience is one of relaxation, openness, allowing. The feeling is one of being like the space in which things can occur but what I AM is unperturbed. Always already here now. Peace, aliveness, an emptiness that is complete.
4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?
A. In a Deep Looking session I looked out over a cemetery from the window in a guest room. I saw only colour. No labels. A spacious awareness that had no boundaries and could not be labelled or contained. There was a disappearing of 'me' and all there was was this spaciousness and I knew myself as THAT.
5) Can you talk about decision, intention, free will, choice and control? What makes things happen? How does it work? What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience.
A. I used to think 'I' made decisions. Not I realise there is no doer. Life happens, breathing happens, decisions are made. All as one flow, complete, interdependent arising, not one mistake, no judgements of good or bad, no separation. I do not choose, choosing happens. I do not control. Instead there is a freshness and aliveness as life flows. Not to me but as me. I am life.
6) Anything to add?
A. This site has been a gift. Giving the final push through inquiry and the work with Ilona to end the search and to begin the enjoyment of consciousness knowing itself. Thank you to Ilona and all the team here.
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