I still surprise myself learning new things, having new insights, even new shifts.
Happy to hear that. This is really just a beginning...
After our convo here one of our admins will send you an invite if you're interested.
Yes please, I'm definitely interested.
Ok, here are my answers for the 6 questions
1) No there is no separate self, me, I at all. Nowhere to be found, not in any shape nor form. And it was never there either.
2) The illusion of a separate self is that we think there is somebody, a person, that is given a certain name. And that person is responsible for everything what happens in his/her life. We think we can control our thoughts, our environment, our actions, how other people should act. We separate ourselves from what is happening. We separate ourselves from other people. It starts very early in life. When we learn to point to things and give it a name, a label. We learn that some things, some emotions, some actions are good, others are bad. And we don't want the so called bad things, emotions, actions. But they still happen, and since we think we are responsible for their happenings we feel that we are a bad person. Which leads to guilt, shame, fear. We feel something is missing. And then the searching starts. Searching to improve that person, searching for a better life, better circumstances, a relationship. Something or someone that can make us complete. But there is nothing to add... There is only to substract... Substract the believe that we are separate, that we are in control, that there is a somebody, a person doing it all...
3) How does it feel to see through the illusion of a separate self? Quite ordinary actually... Nothing really changed. Daily Life just goes on as usual. Ups and downs, happiness and sadness, boredom and excitement, the usual stuff. Nothing is left out. But there is a sense of ease around it, less fighting, less drama. Nothing personal, just sensations happening. And changing all the time, passing by. A sense of wonder too. How beautiful, how perfect this all is.
4) the last bit? I really don't have a clue... The last weeks before and after discovering LU (but before deciding to ask a guide) a lot of extraordinary events and synchronicities happened. They were so out of the normal routine, so extravagant that I felt like there had to be something beyond than "me". These things, these events, I could never have even imagined them, let alone make them happen...It seems that one thing led to another and that the illusion of a separate self was already dissolving. It simply needed that extra push/confirmation in the form of this guided conversation.
5) Decisions: they are made, at the right time, not one minute earlier nor later. No I involved in the decision, it just happens, when it happens. Intention: it's there or it's not. And it can be followed or not but again that following or not following is just happening. “I” don't have anything to say in it or to do with it. The same with free will, choice and control. They are just labels that are put on events after that they happened. “I have free will and made the choice to control my reaction so that's why I didn't lash out” Hah, keeping silent happened. Just that! Nothing to do with free will, nothing to do with choice, nothing to do with control. No me responsible. What makes things happen? I don't know. Not me anyway. Things just happen, call it Life, call it God, call it the Universe...
6) Gratitude! So much gratitude! And love for all you wonderfull people helping others to see.