In need of guidance

[Windcatcher]

There is no "I" certainly not in present moment when looking.

[Windcatcher]

Hello Bananafish

Words are a poor substitute for experience and detract from what is. Thank you seems so weak in expressing what is felt in this moment of immense gratitude for you and your gentle pointing. It seems the attachment to an I has been broken much like the word cushion or table it is just a label. In showing me to truly experience without a subject and that the subject was never there to begin with is gift beyond compare.

May you well

[Bananafish]

Hi Windcatcher. :)

Great that you realised that. Now, do you have any other
issues you want to investigate?

Let me know if there's any.

[Windcatcher]

Thank you, there is no issues :)

[Bananafish]

Thanks!

Now, would you answer the questions below?


1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

5) Describe decision, intention, free will, choice and control. What makes things happen? How does it work? What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience.

6) Anything to add?



Take your time! :)

[Windcatcher]

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

No there is no separate entity at all never was.

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

In taking the label/word  "i" or "me" to be an actual seperate entity the illusion begins and gets stronger. It happens from childhood and is reinforced by parents, friends and society. There is never an enquiry into whether this separate "i" exists just a blind acceptance. There is a real person with a unique personality based on likes, dislikes, conditioning etc but that being said definitely not an unchanging permanent person as layers fall away it becomes more apparent.

3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

It is very freeing for lack of a better word. There was a definite confusion because conceptually it was understood from the Buddah teachings but there was a definite sense of "I" still and frustration. Gosh not sure how to explain, with each pointing it was seen that looking from an I and actual looking was very different, a beautiful gift you shared.

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

At the point where you asked me to look at the feeling in chest and then asked if it was just another sensation in that moment something just collapsed and seeing happened :)

5) Describe decision, intention, free will, choice and control. What makes things happen? How does it work? What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience.

I am still looking at these ideas and what is seen is they are all beliefs based in a belief of a self to do those things whereas they all happen on their own due to circumstances arising in the moment. How it happens hmm seeing then a sensation then a thought then an action then another thought not totally clear on process yet still looking. Nothing to be responsible for. The body senses hunger the thought arises I am hungry the body goes and gets food while the thought is there of I it is just a thought and does not contribute or do the action as it still happens without the word.

[Bananafish]

How it happens hmm seeing then a sensation then a thought then an action then another thought not totally clear on process yet still looking.

Yes, keep looking and further report. :)

[Windcatcher]

Sensation then action and then thought labels experience. Sometimes there is no immediate action if no action required.

[Bananafish]

Sensation then action and then thought labels experience. Sometimes there is no immediate action if no action required.

Is there a fixed order order like that?

Do sensations always precede actions?
Do actions need sensations to occur?

[Windcatcher]

Will investigate more on it

[Windcatcher]

Is there a fixed order order like that?

Not all the time

Do sensations always precede actions?
Do actions need sensations to occur?

Actions are sensations just a different label.

So as to original question on how things happen... somehow the answer does not seem that important it just is... a constant arising and subsiding

[Bananafish]

Actions are sensations just a different label.

Can you elaborate?

So as to original question on how things happen... somehow the answer does not seem that important it just is... a constant arising and subsiding

OK. The original question was "what" makes things happen.
Would you answer that?

[Windcatcher]

Can you elaborate?

When walking there are many sensations.. knee bending, foot making contact with floor and so forth but all are sensations so the "act of walking" is a label of all those sensations.

Ahh ok ... I really don't know how to express it other than it just happens call it life, nature a process happening

[Bananafish]

Again, the question was "what"
makes things happen.

Can you answer this "what" please?

[Windcatcher]

There is just happening no anything making things happen, it just is.