The Gate

Hi Una,

OK - I can't know whether there are other immediate experiences that can be stopped or, as the next exercise shows any other 'experiences' - there is just direct experience - everything else is a story.

Great.

Let’s do a quick direct experience check. Take a pen and notebook with you and find a comfortable place to sit (or stand) outside. For the next 3 minutes write what is happening in direct experience. Include all the sights, sounds, smells, and other sensations/feelings. Also note down what thoughts come up and place a (T) after the sentence/word to identify it as a thought. Then send me your 3 minute experience.

No Una, no I, no me - there is just experiencing. There are sensations - sounds, sights, touch etc - thoughts arising and passing, labelling and starting stories. Once the stories start - e.g the sight become a picture - it is difficult just seeing again - it takes effort. So before the labelling experiencing is effortless.

Beautiful, Una. Sure, it can feel like it takes effort. Beginning at the time we learned to talk, we have been taught/programmed to focus on, value, even cherish, thoughts, logic, intelligence. The programming has been constant our entire lives and has led to a belief that the content of thoughts, the stories, are reality. But shifting perspective from thought to direct experience reveals something completely different happening, doesn’t it? As more beliefs, concepts, assumptions are seen through, immediate experience becomes more obvious. For a few (so I have heard), all beliefs, assumptions, and concepts crumble once the illusion of a separate self is seen through, but for most (if not all), seeing through other beliefs/concepts/programming tend to continue over time. And some beliefs and programs may take a life time, or never be seen through.

LindaR wrote:2. Is there any 'I' deciding anything? Does it feel as though there is any real autonomous individual there who is responsible for anything?
UNA wrote: No - again there is sensation then there is a thought that adds a story to the sensation and another sensation arises and another thought with associated story arises and so on......
LindaR wrote:3. Describe the whole process as fully, but simply as you can.
Una wrote: There is sense contact - seeing, hearing, tasting, touching, smelling - with something, a sensation arises and a response to that sensation then almost simultaneously a thought arises explaining the response, which makes it look like there was a 'decision' - but it's just a story.
It's a bit like a sea anemone - you poke it and it withdraws - no thought just response, but what I do is develop an elaborate story to make it look like there is decision-making going on, because that reinforces the view that there is a maker of the decision - and there isn't...

Did you actually do the exercise, or just think through it? How about giving it another try? And this time, no thinking, just looking. Also, please tell me what specific example you used to look at when describing the process in question 3. ;-).

Please take a normal daily activity such as choosing what food to buy, what shirt to wear, or preparing a meal, and as you do it, try to notice how the decisions seem to take shape.

1. At what exact point was the ‘decision’ made?
2. Is there any 'I' deciding anything? Does it feel as though there is any real autonomous individual there who is responsible for anything?
3. Describe the whole process as fully, but simply and succinctly, as you can.

Warmth & Love,
Linda

Hi Linda,

Very late home from work tonight so no opportunity for outdoor exercises...will do some more looking tomorrow and get back to you tomorrow night.

So,

please tell me what specific example you used to look at when describing the process in question 3. ;-).

The decision about whether to do this exercise tonight or go to bed, because I'm knackered...

1. At what exact point was the ‘decision’ made?

I have no idea, it was just made - it was just there. There were thoughts about going to bed, about being tired, about doing this tomorrow but at the same time there was just the doing of this

2. Is there any 'I' deciding anything? Does it feel as though there is any real autonomous individual there who is responsible for anything?

No...no I just flow - things happening. On the way to the study to write this I needed to decide whether to get ready for bed first (which is what I normally do before I respond to your email) or do it after. Again, there was thought commentary but there was also a 'momentum' - am not sure how else to describe it - to the study. The decision had happened but no sense of where, when or how - it was just there.

3. Describe the whole process as fully, but simply and succinctly, as you can.

There was the thinking - what is the decision that I need to make? What to wear tomorrow? Will I have something to eat? Will I just go to bed? (Am laughing to myself as I just realised I need to make a decision about which decision to make and didn't even notice that). So, there is the thought - will I go to bed? And again this sense of momentum/happening which doesn't start anywhere - and there are more thoughts that tell a story about why I'm at my computer writing this and 'decided' not to go to bed. So the thought of a decision comes after the action to explain it.

Now I am off to bed!

With love,

Una

Hi Una,

So the thought of a decision comes after the action to explain it.

Indeed. Excellent.

Very late home from work tonight so no opportunity for outdoor exercises...will do some more looking tomorrow and get back to you tomorrow night.

Take whatever time is needed, Sunshine. There is no rush. I will wait to hear back from you before commenting further. Sleep well.

Hi Linda,

No outside opportunity, so I did the exercise in the train on the way home from work - hope that's ok. Probably won't get time outdoors until the weekend, so I could do the exercise again if that's better - let me know.

Take a pen and notebook with you and find a comfortable place to sit (or stand) outside. For the next 3 minutes write what is happening in direct experience. Include all the sights, sounds, smells, and other sensations/feelings. Also note down what thoughts come up and place a (T) after the sentence/word to identify it as a thought. Then send me your 3 minute experience.

Sitting on the train (strange to just sit next to a complete stranger (T) and hearing a range of different sounds: voices, the train on the tracks (T), music, more voices. I get more of a sense of no boundaries from sounds (T) People are colour and movement and sometimes still. How do you describe the experience without labelling? (T) Am I doing this right? (T) Moving between writing and watching feels a bit jarring.(T) Many just stare at their phone screens - lots of different expressions. Is he sad? (T) There are reflections in the windows - what is the difference between reflection and reality (T) and beyond that clouds and grey. Will it be raining when I get out? (T) Then lights - traffic and train - flashing past, and trees and stations. Getting darker - will I get out at Royal Park and catch the tram or stay on 'til Brunswick and walk down the street in the dark, risk being mugged (T). Pass that station - ah there was a decision point in there. (T)There is pressure where my body meets the seat and the floor and a cool feeling on my skin when the doors open. There is a sense of my breath - expansion and contraction. There is tightness - a lot to do at work tomorrow (T) Mostly there are just people being and doing - different types of energy. There is life-ing - connection - warmth around my heart area.

Just that.

With love, Una

Hi Una,

No outside opportunity, so I did the exercise in the train on the way home from work - hope that's ok.

That is perfectly okay AND you did a great job!

How do you describe the experience without labelling?

Great observation! Without labeling, assumptions, and memory is there really any way to know what anything is? Look at your hand. Observe it for a moment as you wiggle your fingers. Would you have any idea what that is if you weren’t told what to call it? Putting aside the stories that arising thoughts spin about sensations, can we really know what anything is or what is really going on? Perhaps the best we can say is that Life is experiencing itself as one beautiful movement… and even that statement is not accurate. ;-)

Pass that station - ah there was a decision point in there.

Was there really a decision point? Or did Life just flow, and then a thought arose claiming to have made a decision? How was it really experience?

In your initial posting you stated:

A way of working with what is stopping me from really seeing through a sense of 'I' that is separate and fixed and the centre of everything.

So, let’s do some exploring around the concept of ‘body’ to see what beliefs and assumptions are lurking about. Sound like fun?

Okay, there is an apparent body with all of its magnificent, automatic functioning such as beating heart, pumping blood, digesting food, arising thoughts, growing hair, reflexes etc. And all of these automatic functions can be seen to be happening for the sole purpose of keeping the body alive and assisting it to thrive. Is this how you see it? Or something else? And is there any reason why the body would require ‘Una’ ‘I’’me’ to help the body function in any way what-so-ever? Is there a ‘Una’’I’’me’ located in the body at all, that is experiencing and viewing life as a separate entity from two peek holes in the head? And is there really a body at all, or is the body another assumption, a firmly held belief? Let’s look by starting with an exercise and see where it takes us.

With eyes closed, sitting still, notice the other sensations: hearing, smelling, tasting, touching. With only the input from those four senses, and without relying on thoughts or mental images:

1: Can it be known how tall the body is?
2. Does it have a weight or a volume of the body?
3. Is there a boundary between the body and the clothing?
4. Is there a boundary between the body and the chair?
5. In the direct experience does the body have a shape or a form?
6. Is there an inside or outside?
7. What is the body in the direct experience?

Very much enjoying this exploration with you, Una

Much Love,
Linda

Hi Linda,

Sound like fun?

Yep :-) !

What you said in your post 'viewing life as a separate entity from two peek holes in the head' - that describes clearly how I feel sometimes. That's the bit that I can't seem to dislodge, the really stubborn bit...

Anyway, following on from that thought bubble - I love this exercise when I can relax into it:

1: Can it be known how tall the body is?

No - no sense of height or breadth or width...

2. Does it have a weight or a volume of the body?

No - again, there was more of a sense of the negative space.

3. Is there a boundary between the body and the clothing?
4. Is there a boundary between the body and the chair?

No - no boundaries - again just space and sensations like pressure. It does take effort to experience this - trying to get past the immediate response to assume/create a 'picture' to describe the experience.

6. Is there an inside or outside?

No - no inside, no outside - just experience - sensations - sound, smell, pressure/no pressure - arising and falling.

7. What is the body in the direct experience

As above - in direct experience the body is a series of sensations in flow - pressure, sound, smell, taste, - followed by commentaries that make sense of their non-sense, stitch them together in a particular way.

When I open my eyes it is hard to sustain the sense of sensation in flow. It's when I have no sense of a solid body that I get that strong sense of 'something' staring out of nothing. The last vestige of something...

Thanks for your kindness, generosity and patience Linda - I'm really enjoying this process too!

With love, Una

Hi Una,
Thank you for those responses. You are doing great!

When I open my eyes it is hard to sustain the sense of sensation in flow.

Before we go on to the exercises, I would like to have you do a quick check on expectations. As you read the following statement, please tell me what comes up for you, to include all sensations that are felt. Okay?

Is there an expectation that seeing through the illusion of a separate self will produce an outcome of being completely unaware of a body 24 hours a day, 7 days a week? If so, can you let this expectation go? Can it be okay if Life wants to pretend it is experiencing through a body? Is there anything wrong with this? Would it be enough to see what is REALLY happening but still allow Life to unfold as it unfolds? Knowing that in any moment, all that is needed is a shift in focus from thoughts to sensations prior to thought? Isn’t that calmness in direct experience always available, always HERE?

What you said in your post 'viewing life as a separate entity from two peek holes in the head' - that describes clearly how I feel sometimes. That's the bit that I can't seem to dislodge, the really stubborn bit...

Perfect. This is the spot for us to look into then.

Now, if you will, please answer the following questions:

1. When you say “that describes clearly how I feel sometimes” try to zoom into this feeling ‘'viewing life as a separate entity from two peek holes in the head’, really plunge into it and aim to describe it with simple words.
How does this feeling manifest itself, what are its physical attributes?

2. Then turn your attention to whatever it is that is aware of this ‘'viewing life as a separate entity from two peek holes in the head’.
Is it that which is located in the head? Is it somewhere else? Is it localized?

3. Which would you say sounds truer, more applicable here: “that describes clearly how I feel sometimes” or “that describes clearly how I think sometimes”?

I wonder if perhaps you would consider a recent dream that you might have had while sleeping. Any dream will do. Try to recall as much of the dream as you can. What was happening? What was seen? Heard? Tasted? Smelled? Touched? What feelings arose while the dream was in progress? Now tell me, with the physical body in a semi-conscious, sleep paralyzed state:

1. How was seeing happening with the eyes closed?
2. How was talking happening without the use of vocal cords, tongue, and lips operating?
3. How did hearing occur when the eardrums had no sound waves to process?
4. How did tasting and smelling occur without the use of the nose and taste buds?
5. How were you able to experience tactile sensations when your physical body was not in contact with other physical objects?
6. Are sensations actually located in a body? Or are they sort of just HERE? Go ahead, test it out.
Maybe play your favorite song and observe if the sound is really happening ‘out there’. In direct experience, does hearing have a location? Is there an observer and hearing? or is there just hearing? What about the other senses?

It's when I have no sense of a solid body that I get that strong sense of 'something' staring out of nothing. The last vestige of something...

Take a peek. Is this ‘something’ more a sense of aliveness? Experiencing? Life-ing? If so, how does that aliveness get translated into ‘Una’’I’’me’? With which of the senses is this ‘something’ experienced? Or is experiencing happening and then thoughts arise to label experience as a separate entity called 'Una' 'I' 'me'? Look closely and then tell me what you see.

As you have been doing all along, give these exercises the attention they deserve…even if your imaginary head starts to hurt ;-).

Warmly,
Linda

Hi Linda,

End of another working week - a big out breath...

As you read the following statement, please tell me what comes up for you, to include all sensations that are felt. Okay?

Sure...The overwhelming sensation when I read that statement is openness, 'relaxed-ness'. I don't have an expectation of being able to maintain that sense of flow 24-7 - that's fine. My comment was more around just how quickly the shift back to creating the sensation-stories happens - it is like a reflex. The 'thought' of Life unfolding as it unfolds helps me get in touch with that sense of openness. And, as I'm re-reading about the calmness in direct experience always being available alway here I am crying because at some level I know that is all I know.

1. When you say “that describes clearly how I feel sometimes” try to zoom into this feeling ‘'viewing life as a separate entity from two peek holes in the head’, really plunge into it and aim to describe it with simple words.
How does this feeling manifest itself, what are its physical attributes?

It's like there is 'some thing' looking out and everything else is happening in relation to it - that sense of being the centre. It feels painful/uncomfortable because it is such a selfish view. The feeling is centred in what I say to myself is my head and now looking at it closely I see it's a thought rather than a feeling - then seeing that, the bundle of sensations I label fear arises around my chest and heart - there is a tightness/contraction.

2. Then turn your attention to whatever it is that is aware of this ‘'viewing life as a separate entity from two peek holes in the head’.
Is it that which is located in the head? Is it somewhere else? Is it localized?

OK - this is head hurting stuff...The awareness of the thoughts of something looking at a separate world through the two peek holes isn't located anywhere it just is.

3. Which would you say sounds truer, more applicable here: “that describes clearly how I feel sometimes” or “that describes clearly how I think sometimes”?

*sigh* of course.....it describes clearly how I think sometimes :-)

I wonder if perhaps you would consider a recent dream that you might have had while sleeping.

I very very rarely remember my dreams. When I wake I have a sense that I have been dreaming, but not what about. I did wake up this morning with a strong sense of dreaming so will try connecting with that...

1. How was seeing happening with the eyes closed?
2. How was talking happening without the use of vocal cords, tongue, and lips operating?
3. How did hearing occur when the eardrums had no sound waves to process?
4. How did tasting and smelling occur without the use of the nose and taste buds?
5. How were you able to experience tactile sensations when your physical body was not in contact with other physical objects?

Laugh out loud! I don't know, I don't know, I don't know...........

6. Are sensations actually located in a body? Or are they sort of just HERE? Go ahead, test it out.

In direct experience they are just are present.

Maybe play your favorite song and observe if the sound is really happening ‘out there’. In direct experience, does hearing have a location? Is there an observer and hearing? or is there just hearing? What about the other senses?

The sound is not out there, it's just there and it's no different to sight or taste or smell or touch - they are all the same they are all just experience.They are not separate they part of the same flow...

Is this ‘something’ more a sense of aliveness? Experiencing? Life-ing? If so, how does that aliveness get translated into ‘Una’’I’’me’? With which of the senses is this ‘something’ experienced? Or is experiencing happening and then thoughts arise to label experience as a separate entity called 'Una' 'I' 'me'? Look closely and then tell me what you see.

Yes..it's life-ing...and it doesn't need 'me' or 'my' senses to be experienced because they - life-ing and experience - are not different. Not sure what that means but it's the only way I can describe this experience.

You can't have seeing, because there is no see-er - same with hearing etc etc There is just experience...

*Phew* enough for tonight.....

Smiling at my discombobulation...

With love and appreciation, Una x

Hi Una,

My comment was more around just how quickly the shift back to creating the sensation-stories happens - it is like a reflex.

Exactly. Thoughts are no different than the foot kicking out when the knee is tapped, or when the arm automatically raises to block a punch, or squinting when light hits the eyes.
A sensation happens and then the reflex ‘thoughts’ arise and analyze, evaluate, categorize and ultimately judge the experience. And are not all reflexes a part of the body’s design for the sole purpose of protecting the body to ensure it survives and thrives? But does any of that translate into ‘I’ ‘me’ ‘Una’ in the body?

Let’s take another look at thoughts from a slightly different angle. For the next 3-5 minutes write down every thought that arises. Then:

1. Take a look at each thought to see how it is attempting to protect the body. If you can’t see how the thought is attempting to provide protection, then just write ‘Blank’ next to it, and we will take a closer look.
2. When that is complete, go back through the list of thoughts again, and mark each thought as either, true or false, when looking at the content. So, for example:

Thought: The dishes still need to be washed.
Protection: The body will be threatened with scorn if societal norms of ‘clean’ and ‘organized’ are not followed.
Thought content: False (dishes, need, washed… all labels and concepts)

Okay, your turn. Send me your list when you are done.

It feels painful/uncomfortable because it is such a selfish view.

1. Is there an expectation that liberation (seeing through the illusion of a separate self) will lead to a less selfish view? If so, where did that expectation come from? A teaching, guru, book…maybe?
2. Can you describe in direct experience what is being experienced when you say ‘painful/uncomfortable’? What is it that is experiencing pain and discomfort? Or are these just thoughts that have judged the concept ‘selfish view’?
3. Since thoughts are designed to protect the body, how can they NOT have a selfish view? Isn’t the body designed to look after itself? But does this mean that ‘you’ are the body? Does this mean ‘you’ are being selfish? Does this mean that these are ‘your’ thoughts?

now looking at it closely I see it's a thought rather than a feeling…

Well seen!

then seeing that, the bundle of sensations I label fear arises around my chest and heart - there is a tightness/contraction.

Maybe you would like to do the exercise on looking into fear that you did on March 30th? What is the fear trying to tell you? What is it protecting?

Are sensations actually located in a body? Or are they sort of just HERE? Go ahead, test it out.

In direct experience they are just are present.

Excellent, and is there ANYTHING more than direct experience? Thoughts arise in direct experience, sure, but are the content of thoughts EVER true? So, is there anything provable happening apart from direct experience?

Smiling at my discombobulation...

Smiling over here also. Discombobulation is a good sign that seeing is happening :-).

Okay Sunshine, you have plenty of looking to do for now. Don’t forget to answer ALL of the questions.

Big Hug,
Linda

Hi Linda,

Okay, your turn. Send me your list when you are done.

Thought: I'm not sure about this music.
Protection: The body will be threatened by feelings of aversion
Thought content: False. I, music....labels and concepts

Thought: What to write now - the thoughts seem to have gone.
Protection: The body will be threatened by not being able to do what is expected
Thought content: False. write, thoughts, gone...labelling and concepts

Thought: It's getting a little hot in here.
Protection: The body is threatened by overheating
Thought content: False. hot, here...concepts and labels.

Thought: I do like the colour of the cushion against the chair.
Protection: The body is threatened by focusing on what is uncomfortable and seeks a distraction
Thought content: like, colour, cushion, chair...labels and concepts

Thought: I'm not sure about this song either.
Protection: The body is threatened by feelings of aversion
Thought content: False. I'm, like, song...labels and concepts

Thought: What's really behind the computer screen?
Protection: The body is threatened by seeing the truth.
Thought content: False. Behind, computer screen...labels and concepts

Thought: I can't believe that thoughts aren't happening or is it that I'm not labelling everything that is a thought.
Protection: The body is threatened by failure
Thought content: False. Believe, thoughts, happening, I'm labelling, everything...labels and concepts

Thought: I wonder whether I'm coming down with a cold.
Protection: The body is threatened by illness
Thought content: I, cold...labels and concepts

Thought: This feels very self conscious.
Protection: The body is threatened by embarrassment
Thought content: False. Feels, self, conscious...labels and concepts.

1. Is there an expectation that liberation (seeing through the illusion of a separate self) will lead to a less selfish view? If so, where did that expectation come from? A teaching, guru, book…maybe?

There is an expectation that it will be a less self-centred view - i.e. being part of process/flow rather than 'directing' it. Am not sure where that expectation came from - probably from teachings, but also from experience - i.e. a sense of greater openness and connection when the sense of self is looser.

2. Can you describe in direct experience what is being experienced when you say ‘painful/uncomfortable’? What is it that is experiencing pain and discomfort? Or are these just thoughts that have judged the concept ‘selfish view’?

Tightness and contraction - strong sensations, but also there is the thought 'this is painful'. There is no thing that is experiencing the pain and discomfort - just thoughts arising describing sensations. And yes, the content of the thought is just labelling and judging a concept.

3. Since thoughts are designed to protect the body, how can they NOT have a selfish view? Isn’t the body designed to look after itself? But does this mean that ‘you’ are the body? Does this mean ‘you’ are being selfish? Does this mean that these are ‘your’ thoughts?

Sorry, I'm really struggling with this - don't know why, but I can't see it - will need to reflect more and come back to it.

What is the fear trying to tell you? What is it protecting?

It's telling me that this process is becoming too uncomfortable/challenging. And, it's protecting no thing and everything....

Excellent, and is there ANYTHING more than direct experience? Thoughts arise in direct experience, sure, but are the content of thoughts EVER true? So, is there anything provable happening apart from direct experience?

No there is nothing more than direct experience - that's all - everything else is a story. The content of thoughts can't ever be true because they are just an attempt to label/explain/make sense of experience. The implications of that are too much to get my head around....

I really needed the hug tonight, Linda - thanks.

With love, Una

Hi Una,
Nice job on the exercise!

There is an expectation that it will be a less self-centred view - i.e. being part of process/flow rather than 'directing' it. Am not sure where that expectation came from - probably from teachings, but also from experience - i.e. a sense of greater openness and connection when the sense of self is looser.

Okay, Sweetheart, we are not here to gain a ‘less self-centered view’ or ‘to losen sense of self’. We are here to see the undeniable, irrefutable, always been the case, fact that there is no I, me, Una that exists to be self centered. There is no ‘I’ ‘Una’ that can be a part of the process/flow. There is no ‘I’ ‘Una’ that is, or has ever, directed or controlled anything.

A sense of greater openness and connection may very well occur, or it may not. The experience is different for everyone.

Regardless, the human experience, with all its ups and downs, joy and sorrow, fun and scary experiences, will continue. Feelings will continue to get hurt, offenses will occur, pleasurable and not so pleasurable states will come and go. The difference will be that once the belief in a separate self is seen through, and the content of thoughts are no longer believed, then thoughts tend to lose their punch, and mental suffering only occurs when thoughts are being believed again. You may even find greater humor in the human experience, or you may ‘feel’ the human experience more acutely. Or both.

So, please consider, is it truth that you are really seeking? Specifically, to see that there is no separate entity called ‘Una’? And would you want to see the truth if it cost you EVERY treasured, precious, belief currently held? If so, you have come to the right place and I am happy to assist in pointing.
Or is it really a sense of greater openness and connection that you are looking for? If so, then I have nothing of benefit to offer you.
Please consider carefully, and tell me what comes up for you reading this, to include felt sensations.

Sorry, I'm really struggling with this - don't know why, but I can't see it - will need to reflect more and come back to it.

Beautiful. Love the honesty here!

Now, what is this ‘I’m’ and ‘I’ that is struggling, can’t see it, and needs to reflect more? Actually look and tell me what you see. Don’t cheat by giving me a mind answer…really look. This is important.

It's telling me that this process is becoming too uncomfortable/challenging. And, it's protecting no thing and everything....

Okay, great. And can ‘uncomfortable/challenging’ be welcomed? Can it be okay for ‘uncomfortable/challenging’ to stay for as long as it likes, and leave when it wants? Can all of life’s various expressions be welcomed, understanding that on some level, it is already welcomed, in that it is here? Or is there a preference for only ‘comfort/easy’? Again, when answering the questions, please be sure to include felt sensations.

No there is nothing more than direct experience - that's all - everything else is a story. The content of thoughts can't ever be true because they are just an attempt to label/explain/make sense of experience. The implications of that are too much to get my head around....

Hehe. You will NEVER get your head around the implications. It is the head (thoughts) that got us into this apparent mental game, and we cannot use what got us into the ‘game’, to get us out of it. Instead of getting your head around it, why not look with the heart instead? The heart is comfortable with not having all the answers. The heart is the spaciousness that has no preferences for how Life flows, it simply is experiencing.
Only the head (thoughts), in its apparent role to protect the body, has preferences, judgments, a need to understand, a need for all things to be sunny and comfortable. Why not let thoughts do what they are designed to do, without the need to get involved and believe the content? Is this a possibility?
Why continue to believe that there is a separate self that can interfere and garner some illusionary control over how Life unfolds? Hasn’t there been enough mental suffering? Or is there a perceived benefit in maintaining the belief of a separate self, despite the irrefutable evidence against it that has already been seen?

Maybe you might want to consider the possibility that this is about switching the focus from the head to the heart? What do you say?

Much Love,
Linda

Hi Linda,

is it truth that you are really seeking?

Yes.

Specifically, to see that there is no separate entity called ‘Una’?

Yes.

And would you want to see the truth if it cost you EVERY treasured, precious, belief currently held?

Without doubt.

Please consider carefully, and tell me what comes up for you reading this, to include felt sensations.

What else is there? That's what comes up for me - what is the point of Life if not to see the truth at any cost? And, in seeing that there is no fear, there is just relief - an out breath.

Now, what is this ‘I’m’ and ‘I’ that is struggling, can’t see it, and needs to reflect more? Actually look and tell me what you see. Don’t cheat by giving me a mind answer…really look.

OK - what I see is the sensation then a thought that labels that sensation "this is pain" then a story starts to unfold "that pain is in your lung - maybe the start of a cold"...There is just that, there is no I experiencing it or struggling - just another sensation that is labelled as frustration which has a struggle story that goes with it. So - again, just sensation arising, thoughts arising but there is no I in there so no I to be selfish (which of course is just another label).

And can ‘uncomfortable/challenging’ be welcomed?

Yes - because it is just another label for a sensation. It is just an experience which could equally be labelled comfortable/easy. Smiling and thinking thoughts labelled 'of course!'

Can it be okay for ‘uncomfortable/challenging’ to stay for as long as it likes, and leave when it wants?

'Comfortable/challenging are just labels - so yes they can stay or go - underneath it is experience which keeps happening regardless.

Can all of life’s various expressions be welcomed, understanding that on some level, it is already welcomed, in that it is here? Or is there a preference for only ‘comfort/easy’?

Of course - sensations/thoughts will arise and pass responding to and trying to explain Life as it just keeps unfolding - seeing through the stories takes away their power and just leaves experience. In the end comfort/easy and uncomfortable/uneasy are the same - labels and concepts....Relief...

Why not let thoughts do what they are designed to do, without the need to get involved and believe the content? Is this a possibility?
Why continue to believe that there is a separate self that can interfere and garner some illusionary control over how Life unfolds? Hasn’t there been enough mental suffering? Or is there a perceived benefit in maintaining the belief of a separate self, despite the irrefutable evidence against it that has already been seen?
Maybe you might want to consider the possibility that this is about switching the focus from the head to the heart? What do you say?

Laughing a lot and really loudly! Welcome to my world....and my life challenge, getting out of my head and into my heart. That's what this - maintaining a belief in a separate self - has been all about - protecting the heart and there's no better way of protecting it than making sure that it's never vulnerable and there's not better way of ensuring it's not vulnerable than no going there...What goes on in my head may not be pleasant at times, but it's safe...Or at least that's what's worked up until now....

So, yes, there's been enough mental suffering and the evidence thus far against a seperate self is irrefutable and there is no thing to protect anymore, not even my heart and that feels ok.

Bring it on...

Big love, Una

Hi Una,
Thank you for those responses. It appears more good seeing is happening…maybe a shift beginning to unfold?

Bring it on...

Excellent!

Welcome to my world....and my life challenge, getting out of my head and into my heart. That's what this - maintaining a belief in a separate self - has been all about - protecting the heart and there's no better way of protecting it than making sure that it's never vulnerable and there's not better way of ensuring it's not vulnerable than no going there...What goes on in my head may not be pleasant at times, but it's safe...Or at least that's what's worked up until now....

Ah, great that you are looking to see what is behind the resistance/fear. And now that it is seen that there is no ‘I’’me’’Una’ to protect, How about we take a closer look at the paragraph above to check if there is anything further that can be seen?

But first, just to be clear, and to make sure we are not implying a new separate self, now called ‘heart’… when the label ‘heart’ is used, it is meant, the aliveness, experiencing happening HERE, NOW…THIS. Is this how you see it? Or is ‘Una’ trying to hide behind the ‘heart’ now ;-)?

Okay, so let’s look at your paragraph above. What I invite you to do is:

1. Read through the paragraph again exactly as written. Then go back and re-read the paragraph by removing all of the words ‘my’. As you do this, notice whether the feeling changes. Does it feel more personal, less personal? Does it feel truer, or less true? Also notice and report on all felt sensations as you read and consider.

2. Then go back through the paragraph and after each sentence write a (T) for ‘thought’, if the sentence is a thought, and write (DE), if it is directly experienced. Send me what you come up with.

And when you say:

Welcome to my world....and my life challenge, getting out of my head and into my heart.

Can you find any entity ‘Una’ ‘I’ ‘me’ that possesses a world, has a life and challenges? Can you find any entity at all that possesses a head and heart?

Give this a try:
1. Please stand up and walk slowly across the room for 5 steps, and then return slowly and sit down. A body moved around a room. Was that body you? Notice the experiencing of the whole thing? There is an experience, there are sensations, but does that experience and do those sensations amount to you, an individual?

2. Now as you sit, look carefully and notice whether any end of nose can be seen, any hands, or knees, any other body parts. Ponder carefully. There is an experience of noticing (visually) body parts, but are any of those body parts you? What is it that is looking? Is that you? Or is there just a sensation labeled as 'looking'? Is there just experiencing?

In each case, please just report what feels real, and don’t forget to report on sensations that are felt while doing the exercises.

XX,
Linda

Hi Linda,

Yep, beginning to feel the shift...

Is this how you see it? Or is ‘Una’ trying to hide behind the ‘heart’ now ;-)?

Good to look at and there's no Una behind the 'heart' - just Life-ing, the sense of being present.

1. Read through the paragraph again exactly as written. Then go back and re-read the paragraph by removing all of the words ‘my’. As you do this, notice whether the feeling changes. Does it feel more personal, less personal? Does it feel truer, or less true? Also notice and report on all felt sensations as you read and consider.

Wow, it takes the 'contraction' and 'tightness' out of it. It just is what it is without being followed by 'judgement'. So it feels truer - it's like reporting without editorialising. Shift in perception...

2. Then go back through the paragraph and after each sentence write a (T) for ‘thought’, if the sentence is a thought, and write (DE), if it is directly experienced. Send me what you come up with.

Welcome to my world...and my life challenge, getting out of my head and into my heart. (T)

That's what this is - maintaining a brief in a separate self has been all about - protecting the heart and there's no better way of protecting it than making sure that it's never vulnerable and there's no better way of ensuring it's not vulnerable by not going there. (T)

What goes on in my head may not be pleasant at times, but it's safe. (T)

Or, at least that's what's worked up until now... (T)

Ha ha ha...all thoughts, no direct experience....

Can you find any entity ‘Una’ ‘I’ ‘me’ that possesses a world, has a life and challenges? Can you find any entity at all that possesses a head and heart?

No Una, no I, just sensations, thoughts and stories trying to explain experience.

1. Please stand up and walk slowly across the room for 5 steps, and then return slowly and sit down. A body moved around a room. Was that body you? Notice the experiencing of the whole thing? There is an experience, there are sensations, but does that experience and do those sensations amount to you, an individual?

No - there were sensations...looking and seeing a form labelled a shadow and a thought saying Una - but then looking deeper there's just moving, sitting, typing and no thing doing any of that. It feels spacey and permeable. Does that amount to 'me', an individual? No it doesn't amount - it doesn't add up because there is no thing to add to experience.

2. Now as you sit, look carefully and notice whether any end of nose can be seen, any hands, or knees, any other body parts. Ponder carefully. There is an experience of noticing (visually) body parts, but are any of those body parts you? What is it that is looking? Is that you? Or is there just a sensation labeled as 'looking'? Is there just experiencing?

The 'body parts' are another label and are as much 'I' as the 'computer'. Noticing the body parts and noticing the computer are the same experience - just labeled differently. And, yes, of course 'looking', 'hearing', 'feeling' are labels for sensations - but they aren't different each other or from experience, which just keeps unfolding and unfolding. It is all just experiencing. Feeling blurred....soft...and sending love,

Una

Good stuff, Una.

but then looking deeper there's just moving, sitting, typing and no thing doing any of that. It feels spacey and permeable. Does that amount to 'me', an individual? No it doesn't amount - it doesn't add up because there is no thing to add to experience.

I have noticed the word ‘no thing’ several times in your responses. Is this a learned term from some teacher or book? What is that in direct experience?
During this investigation I am asking for answers from your own direct experience only. No teachers, gurus, books, or jargons allowed! ;-).

Let’s do a check. Please answer the following questions honestly from your current direct experience.

Is there a self that is the ‘experiencer’, the ‘doer’ or the ‘controller’?
Is there a self that ‘makes’ decisions, a self that thinks?
Is the "body" doing the actual experiencing or is it experienced?
Is there doubt or unclarity that in all these cases the ‘self’ is nothing other than a mental fabrication?
Is there a ‘Una’ that can be self-centered?
Has there ever been a ‘Una’ doing anything?
Do you have any doubts or issue coming up at this point?

Warmly,
Linda