I sure would like to wake up, Hello.

[Sailor]

Is there really someone in there 'controlling' what you should focus on, what to decide, etc? Watch it carefully.

Well this is the heart of the matter.
I"ll have to just rest with this one and hope for epihany.
I am grateful for help.

[Moonlight]

Well, Mike, do keep posting on your findings. It wont work to only hope for the epiphany :), but if you plan to LOOK, really follow the process of the mind, you'll get there.

It's a real pleasure working with you. Hoping to hear from you soon.

[Sailor]

Thanks for saying that. You are generous and kind.
I was afraid I was becoming a
pain in the epiphany.
Aloha

[Sailor]

Hello,
The sun is shining like mid July, people are suntanning at the beach. Beautiful yes except it's the middle of winter.
I am determined to discover I am not Me. OK but what is here? Even the cat is being nice to me. 2012 is going to be an interesting year.
Really have hit a road block here, I just kind of look around mindlessly. I do the basic living stuff because i'm hungry or need to wash ect. I'm just kind of looking . Not pleasent or unpleasent.
Wow, what sunshine.

[Moonlight]

Keep in mind, trying to find the no you is a little like trying to look for a unicorn in the room. It just doesnt exist, so no amount of looking will find it. Is that the road block, trying to find something that isn't there?

If you read this at the beach, well, look around. Does nature need a controller, or is it just happening? In the same way, do 'you' need a controller?
.

[Sailor]

"I" am still here. I am behind my eyes and in my head still. Not in a body because I could lose body parts and still be here. Happy though because what a pleasure it is to be here, now, today.
Thanks

[Sailor]

What a beautiful day. How can I be serious about waking up when everything is so pleasent?
Money? Yes I do need more very soon or big trouble.
Health? Not looking forward to the annual checkup this month but I feel Good.
Worried? Was my dailey companion. Not today.
I just feel better, not sure why.
I wish I could report I am not here, but there is something that is aware inside my head.
Just a very pleasent seeing\experiancing. I even played piano today for the first time in several years.
It was silly and fun.Playing is a good discription.
I'm still here but I feel fine today.
It seems to me that there is more so I am still trying to pay attention here.
I'd like to take this road to it's final destination. I still want to stand on MT Everest
and see what it looks like.
Thanks for your helping.

[Sailor]

As to who is here? It still seems "I" am in my head looking and feeling "other". That is, something separate from "ME".

[Sailor]

Hello Again,
What an odd thing to happen. I had (still having) a beautiful day. It has been awhile since I have had this pleasent an experiance.
The point here though is a direct experiance of reality. I am here, I am looking. I am not going away untill I see.
Just doesn't seem apparent at this here\now. " I" just seems to be the window I look thru at the moment.
Thanks

[Moonlight]

Well, I am very happy you had a good experience/day! Just "Being", as opposed to our usual movement towards doing, thinking, planning, etc, as we are conditioned to do from early childhood, is such a kind of relief. But, as you say, we still have to continue our investigation until you really see that the self is an illusion.

I am determined to discover I am not Me.
"I" am still here. I am behind my eyes and in my head still.
I'm still here but I feel fine today.
It still seems "I" am in my head looking and feeling "other". That is, something separate from "ME"
I am here, I am looking. I am not going away untill I see.

When you look for the 'I' which is doing, thinking all those things, where do you find it? Is it really there, or do you find just the awareness, the being-ness, the body/mind processes? Remember, the 'sense' of self is a default in our brains, that remains, so we still answer to our names, eat when we need to, etc. But does the sense of self point to anything real?

Take the simple act of looking at this screen. You think, you are looking, but what is really happening? Looking is just happening effortlessly, isn't it? Sure, the body processes are happening, but can you find the 'you' which is supposedly doing the looking? Really look for it.

" I" just seems to be the window I look thru at the moment.

The eyes are the windows looking out. That's the body perspective, which is, of course unique.

[Moonlight]

What I am suggesting here (and in no way should you believe this, the only way is direct experience), is that

Awareness, beingness, life, IS.
Your body/mind and its processes, exist.
Emotions arise, thoughts arise, sensations arise, they exist.
But 'you', as a separate, controlling entity, do NOT exist. It is a thought, which is 'tacked on' to thoughts, emotions, sensations, experiences to 'claim' them as yours.

Try to drop all your stories, your history, your past, your beliefs, all that you know, like if you suddenly got amnesia. Close your eyes, 'forget' it all, and open them, and tell me what do you find? Is there a you experiencing, or do you find only the aliveness? And then a thought "I" claiming it? Check it out and tell me what you find.

[Sailor]

Interesting exercise. When I don't think I am just experiances. Body sight sound ect. "ME" seems to occur when I am not just being but thinking or focusing on something. Much more comfortable not thinking.
Another day in paradise here.

[Sailor]

This is starting to be more comfortable now. Oddly I notice a fear response trying to bubble up. It's pretty weak though. It feels like nothing changes but the point of viewing

[Moonlight]

Wow about paradise! But I hope we can continue our looking too.

Isn't it interesting that when you drop your stories about yourself, you disappear! What does that mean?

You said,"when I don't think, I am just experiences". Look at that statement and your experience. Is it true? Are 'you' experiences, or are experiences happening?

The me that occurs when you are thinking or focusing, is it really occurring, o
r is it a thought about "I" that comes in to say that "you" are thinking or feeling etc (when only thinking or sensations are occurring). Look closely at that.

[Moonlight]

I posted before your second post appeared.

Fear is very common at this point. Let it come closer, let it tell you what it wants to say. What is it trying to protect?

Please write more about it. And yes, the seeing is more a change of perspective, a shift. In the beginning.