The Gate

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

No. Never. That's all I have to say about that.

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

It's a convention of language, given a life of its own. Sentences have subjects and objects. Lacking a subject, one was invented. And somehow believed to be a real thing. Totally believed, with no evidence to support it. How bizarre is that?

3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

No time spent worrying about the future or past whatsoever. That was a favorite pastime. There is no connecting sense of "I" between bouts of intense imagining (thinking). Meditation is so easy it's ridiculous now. It's just sitting and doing nothing for a spell. No matter how much thinking comes up, I cannot re-believe in "I." Those spaces are very restful. Nothing is sticking to me any more. It's all surprisingly unspiritual at this point. Just an optical illusion that's been seen through.

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

Seeing that the witness identity was just as false as all the rest. Identity, subject-ness, is a human label not a real thing. Seeing that attention is a biological phenomenon having to do with body/brain and under their control not "mine." These are sacred cows among seekers.

5) Do you decide, intend, choose, control events in Life? Do you make anything happen? Give examples from your experience.

LOL no. Things happen. This bodymind makes a limited range of things happen on its own by obeying it's own natural laws and conditioning. No little commander inside. No manifestor. Universe is universing the universe. And even that is a story!

6) Anything to add?

It's all a little game, how silly. Imagining (thinking, labeling, utterly no difference) vs. what is. Just say "meh" when you catch yourself imagining again. It's content is meaningless. It doesn't enhance this life. Let life live. Look for the real.It cannot be found within the stream of thought, of imagination. How could it?

It's been a real pleasure. :)

Connected, never apart, never separate. Wishing the bodymind called Silvia peace, joy, and long life. <3

Mark

Dear Mark,

Clarity and simplicity in your answers. Lovely.

I don't have any more questions for you. I'll show your answers to the other guides and let you know if they have any.

Connected, never apart, never separate. Wishing the bodymind called Silvia peace, joy, and long life. <3

The feeling is more than mutual Mark. I really enjoyed having this dialogue. Much peace and joy to you too.

Love
Silvia x

The greatest value you provided was your mere existence. Someone who went through the same process is enormously comforting.

To those who read these words, understand that you must do all the work yourself. No teacher, no guide, no book can do that for you. They just gently (or not!) push you back into the ring to wrestle with understanding.