no center no periphery

[Ross K.]

self is a grouping of views about events that have happened, in ones life. One takes life personally and carries the illusion that these memories, coupled with up bringing and social conditioning, are a fixed thing. maybe one thinks personality goes to heaven or hell or no-where at all(nihilism). self is I am that ness. (apparent/assumed) subject. is a barrier/boundary really a barrier/boundary or is just a continuation of all that is? It's as if you draw a circle, and put some things inside it and say theye are inside the circle, and forgetting that you drew the lines, and then believing thats how it has to be. taking it as the truth. Are you confused? you should be. Its hard to fallow this line of resoning because it has been created (however poorly by me). in short self is nothing but a word.

No self: all thoughts feeling emotions whatever any way of experiencing reality is impersonal. Absolutily everything that is to be experienced and is conditioned changes. particularly this mind state that is experienced right now, its changing. wishing for it to be constant, trying to make it constant is stressful however subtle. is it fit to regard any as such as self with it being inconstant and stressful. No self is just "this", here and now with no me in between. which is reality just as it is.
I am going on Jhana retreat next week. and at the end of that retreat I'm going home (Des Moines, Ia). going back to the market place sort of speak. After I get settled (on my Dad's couch) I will consider giving the "herding" a shot.

[Elena]

Hey, Nipuna. Gad to see you here, my friend. Happy my blog and my sharing on Dho was helpful. So let's just confirm this ok? I know you saw that self is just an illusion, a lable. You just go deeper now with Theravada, and its great - whatever you inspired to do. But lets' confirm you realized what we offer here, ok?

Please answer me this:

DO YOU EXIST?

[Ross K.]

no seems like such a short answer so I'm gonna say, NO.

[Ross K.]

just to be clear:
what is you?
and,
what is exist?

[Ilona]

that is a great question, can you answer that for us here? what is you, self, i?
how does it work?
What exists?

[Ross K.]

Well I was just wanting to clear up any semantic confusion with the question, "do you exist?". Now that I'm clear on the semantics I am sure of my answer. No I do not exist. And I'm not gonna type all that stuff again. It's already been explained. Besides explaining self is like explaining a fantasy that currently being guessed up. No self is reality as it is.

[Ilona]

Beautiful. :)

I'm changing your colour to blue, thank you, Ross, for the conversation. If yo get inspired to help others, please join in.

[Ross K.]

Hey that matches my shirt! I'm kinda on retreat here at the monastery so I'm gonna try to be quiet on the Internet till next Friday. Peace