The Gate

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

No. There never was one.

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

From my perspective, it is a way to 'see' objects. If I am separate from everything, then everything exists. I exist as a separate being in this body. Everything else is 'out there'. It starts when we are babies and are taught there are separate beings, 'mommy' and 'daddy'. Objects are held up and labeled as not you.

3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

I am just now adapting to this new perspective. I feel supported, peaceful, calm, clear, expansive, whole, light hearted, love. I felt a lot of these things before this started, but not from this perspective of being part of it, of being it.

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

I was at a retreat and was meditating all day, every day. Things started to change a couple days in. My head would get dizzy, fuzzy. I heard someone talk on the stage, and it sounded like they were in my head. I opened my eyes, everything I saw was only a shape and a color, like a huge drawing on paper. Everything outlined in white. I shut my eyes. When I opened them again, things went back to the way they were. These things happened with more frequency. It was surreal. I was joyful, very blissed-out. Exactly when the sense of a separate 'me' left, I don't know. I didn't look until I came home. I looked, and there was nothing, just beautiful open space. It took a couple of days to really see/feel/absorb everything. I've been home 2 weeks and still moving slowly forward.

5) Describe how decisions are made & give examples from experience.

I am currently not 'doing' much of anything. When I do get up and do something, I just do it, without thinking anything about it. I see what needs to be done, and make it happen. However, I don't seem to see much to be done, currently.

Describe intention & give examples from experience.

Intention.. things just seem to fall into place once an intention has been made. Last night I decided I needed to start walking every day again (my daughter had a baby and I had been putting all extra time into helping her). This morning, she called me, early, ,and said, let's go for a walk this morning, okay?

Describe free will & give examples from experience.

Free will has not changed, it is part of what I am. The difference is my free will now serves All That Is. The highest good for all. I feel huge amounts of love for everyone, not just my family, so it really isn't any different, other than the small self is not looking to get anything out of it.

Describe choice & give examples from experience.

Do I sometimes rush past the little voice that is whispering? Yes. I am learning what it feels like to be in the flow constantly. I don't always clearly see if I should offer to help or is it best to step back and let things pan out themselves? I have slowed down quite a bit, making it easier to see what choice would be beneficial. However, I no longer feel that a specific choice is 'wrong', it just leads me down a different path.

Describe control & give examples from experience

Big changes on the control front. I used to have definite ideas on how things should turn out, or even get done. I no longer have such strong feelings on who/what/where. For the first time, I am not controlling Christmas eve! I have no designs on how anything will occur, I just said yes to everything everyone wanted to do! And it will be perfect!

What makes things happen? How does it work?

Life makes things happen. I have no idea how it works! It works in perfect unison with everything and every no-thiing. It is perfection in action!

What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience

I am not responsible for anything!!

Thank you so much Henri!

Thank you for your answers, Lori!

I will now share these with other guides to see if they have questions. I'll post the questions here.

Once done, you will be invited into the LU FB group if that is of interest to you :)

Here are the first questions:

Do you have a body?

Is there really free will? Could any other choice be made?

What evidence is there of a "higher good"?

Hey Lori,

Are you still interested in going through the wrapping up process of LU and answering the follow-up questions?

Hi Henry,
I apologize for not getting back to you. Truth be told we all got sick, and plans changed. We are better now! Thanks for the reminder.

Do you have a body?

I look at a glass and I feel myself in the glass, I look outside, I am the trees. I look down, whose leg is that? I don't know the answer to this question, but I am everything. Everything is my body.

Is there really free will? Could any other choice be made?

I make the choice that I am drawn to. Do I always know immediately what choice to make? No. Example: I need to go get groceries. I don't know if I should walk or drive. I see it's raining. I love the rain! It's so beautiful. I grab my umbrella and walk, with my backpack. I come home very cold, but exhilarated. Could I have driven? Yes. Would I have been warmer if I drove? Yes, but the gloriousness of the rain would have been missed.

What evidence is there of a "higher good"?

The higher good is what is happening, right now. If I look around, everything is happening for the higher good. That is the evidence, it is happening!

I apologize for not getting back to you. Truth be told we all got sick, and plans changed. We are better now! Thanks for the reminder.

Glad everyone is feeling better :)

I make the choice that I am drawn to. Do I always know immediately what choice to make? No. Example: I need to go get groceries. I don't know if I should walk or drive. I see it's raining. I love the rain! It's so beautiful. I grab my umbrella and walk, with my backpack. I come home very cold, but exhilarated. Could I have driven? Yes. Would I have been warmer if I drove? Yes, but the gloriousness of the rain would have been missed.

Another way to ask this is: Can you predict what thoughts come next?

And do you control making the choice you're drawn to, or does it simply happen?

Another way to ask this is: Can you predict what thoughts come next?

No.

And do you control making the choice you're drawn to, or does it simply happen?

Oh, I see what you're asking, I think. As to the rain example: I saw the rain and immediately wanted to walk in it, there was no thought about driving or getting cold, I just put my gear on and went. It was just what should be done.
However, when I came back my husband was dismayed that I had gone out in the cold and rain after just being sick, and said I was crazy, I should have taken my car! That is when I thought, yes, that makes sense, but inside I didn't feel that way. I did what was best for me, which was walking. Some would say this wasn't the 'right' choice, but it was.

Thank you for those answers.

Here are two more questions if you don't mind. This is regarding your earlier statement in the thread (before final questions) where you said:

"What I can say about the self, is that when it does show up, it doesn't have a grip. I cannot say it doesn't try, it is felt. But something has pushed me over the sweet edge of caring abut it. I don't. It's there, unattended"

And so here are the questions:

When this sense of self shows up, is it you?

Does it have any independent nature, is it in any way controlled by you?

When this sense of self shows up, is it you?

It is the me that used to care, but I don't anymore. My husband seems to be the only one who can cause an awareness of.... pain? hurt? off in the distance. Like another life lived? I can see where it would have caused a reaction in me before, and I see the reaction, but it has no effect. Like a ghost. I think there is self attached to it somewhere.

Does it have any independent nature, is it in any way controlled by you?

Not controlled by me, it seems random. It doesn't happen very often, hardly ever, but I do see it, weirdly, off in the distance! A hurt or fear, or unsettled blob... I am curious about it, and that is all. Doe that make any sense? It feels so laborious to try and put things into words, haha!

Thank you, Lori.

I will see if there are any other questions.

One guide suggested meetings to flesh out and refine, and I would agree, whenever you are ready for it.

There are 3 groups you can attend:

Vince Shubert has one or two per week. Email vinceschubert@gmail.com for more information.

Luchana and Lubo have a group on Thursdays. Email Luchana at luchanauzunova@gmail.com

Ilona holds a monthly meeting. Write admin@ilonaciunaite.com for more.

And then there is https://perfectlyokay.org/ which is a community with many different meetings.

Here's the final comment from a guide

she seems to talk of a self that sometimes is there sometimes not. She doesn't seem fully clear about if it's a real self coming and going or just a belief. However the vibe feels like a significant shift has happened.

I would agree that there seems to be confusion about what is a self and what is not. This can be clarified through the groups I mentioned above, and just remaining curious.

For example when you say:

Not controlled by me, it seems random. It doesn't happen very often, hardly ever, but I do see it, weirdly, off in the distance! A hurt or fear, or unsettled blob...

Is this a self, or a mental image?

And then...

I can see where it would have caused a reaction in me before, and I see the reaction, but it has no effect. Like a ghost. I think there is self attached to it somewhere.

You think, but do you know? Can you find it? :)

Is this a self, or a mental image?

It is a mental image. I don't know where it comes from. Is it a belief? The self? I will have to sit with it.

I am still wacked-out by it all, I don't articulate things well, they are just so hard to say anything about. I feel love for everything, and yet somehow detached.... and yet everything is so interesting, mysterious and beautiful.

I feel like I need to withdraw and get a grip on how to 'be' now that I am 'being' everything. How does a window into the world operate?

Thanks for the info, Henri, I will join one of the groups when it seems right. Is that how to proceed?

Much love to you Henri, for everything you have done for me, and for everyone!

It is a mental image. I don't know where it comes from. Is it a belief? The self? I will have to sit with it.

Who knows what it is! :)

I am still wacked-out by it all, I don't articulate things well, they are just so hard to say anything about. I feel love for everything, and yet somehow detached.... and yet everything is so interesting, mysterious and beautiful.

I completely understand.

I feel like I need to withdraw and get a grip on how to 'be' now that I am 'being' everything. How does a window into the world operate?

Thanks for the info, Henri, I will join one of the groups when it seems right. Is that how to proceed?

Much love to you Henri, for everything you have done for me, and for everyone!

No problem. Trust your own experience and let things fall into place.

If you resonate with joining a group, then that is how to proceed, otherwise something else will show up and movement toward it will happen.

Okay, so we are done here. You should have been invited to the FB group by the admin.

It has been a pleasure talking to you, Lori. I wish you all the best :)