The Gate

In your last 2 questions I had trouble understanding what you meant with your English.

Is there you, or friend which is not the word which you chose?

I interpret:

Is there anything in you or in a friend that doesn’t fit the word/s you chose?

No!, they all seem to go together illuminating different aspects

can this come and go?

I interpret:

is this word/s provisional?

I 'see' , experience that they can be. When feeling together they can illuminate the experience of life, when disconnected cast darkness, deaden the light, let the "self selfing"

light in direct, clear experience, darkness in ideas and concepts that build stories and illusions of "I" as an independent, substantial being.

Thank you

Victoria

I feel I need to use words, what else for responding to your enquiry? but I notice they can show the light, the love,
or the darkness - here I feel some fear, resistance; the illusion of self in disguise!

I have seen that they have been carrying my illusions, fantasies too often. Perhaps I need to be lighter about words, lighter about me, mine and I.

So beautifully sat. Yes words brings illusion and also they point something which is here and when we follow this finger we see the moon but not the finger.

or the darkness - here I feel some fear, resistance; the illusion of self in disguise!

Yes, I know this dark experience - this is a doubt that we are not good enough, that there is something wrong with us, as if we are not expression of the wholeness, of this miracle, expression of love. Can you see this?
Can you see how separate me appears because of the story about the unworthy one?

Check what is coming when you say to this idea about the unworthy one. Connect with it and then say loudly -
"Fuck off. There is nothing yours. Victoria is already taken care of. Victoria is expression of the cosmic Love, Victoria is exactly what Totality wants her to look like at this very moment."
Say it again and again, challenge all contracted structures.

What is coming?

Love to love,
Lubo

Hello Lubo,

Yes, I know this dark experience - this is a doubt that we are not good enough, that there is something wrong with us, as if we are not expression of the wholeness, of this miracle, expression of love. Can you see this?
Can you see how separate me appears because of the story about the unworthy one?

I notice that words underneath hide inadequacy, “lack of self esteem, lack of love” fear to be abandoned, fear to be unheard and they are all images of something unmet and sad. I see that this shadow in the words feels bad itself; it is so alone, unworthy, unheard, abandoned, the opposite of being alive, universal all over the body, senses, feelings and awareness.

Check what is coming when you say to this idea about the unworthy one. Connect with it and then say loudly -
"Fuck off. There is nothing yours. Victoria is already taken care of. Victoria is expression of the cosmic Love, Victoria is exactly what Totality wants her to look like at this very moment."

I am with this unworthy and sad idea or story, seeing it from an energised and loving Victoria, I am well connected to everything including this unworthiness, and I will not say “fuck off” but;

“I see how much you dwell in your wounds and keep wanting my attention, I see you very powerless, I will take care of you, not by sending you brutally away, but by hold your hand so that being fed by love you will walk silently and eventually disappear without complaints”

say it again and again and se how its constructions change

Yes, by placing love in the shadow, it's needs, its wounds, they disappear in love and unity becomes. I see this now and it's happening now, let see how it continues in the day to day.

With gratitude

Victoria

Mm, I like this way of love.
Beautiful.

Can you do this to anger, as well?
Let's check. Meet it, ask "O my dearest anger, my precious power are you here, are you feel loved and embraced?"
and notice the answer?

Love
Lubo

Hello Lubo,

Can you do this to anger, as well?
Let's check. Meet it, ask "O my dearest anger, my precious power are you here, are you feel loved and embraced?"
and notice the answer?

I sense very deeply that I am in a sort of dual situation: the light: contented, kind, compassionate and aware existence who sees directly into experience, and the dark: messed up, sad, unworthy and angry that is unaware.

I work with what I have: so I leap from the light and help the messy party -to make it vanish! to become one!

So yes, anger will arise, but, from experience, I will meet it; either before it explodes or after it explodes, and I will be that kind walking companion who understands that, connection, togetherness, unity happen within the energy of kindness or love. who knows that treating anger with more anger will not make it go away, but make it bigger, more polarised and the illusion of “I” as anger will be magnified and perpetuated. Of course, it is work in progress.

Thanks

Victoria

Wonderful to see this.
Yes, anger is our power and the shrunken limited self is ashamed of this power, start owning that power and makes it weak in order to rule it, to be in control. This is our dear mother in the head.

I want you to play with the body, notice the movements of the hand, notice mam's voice coming and saying "we move the hand, this is our hand" see if this imaginary image can move the hand, see that thoughts cannot move any part on the body

Play with this :)

Love
Lubo

Hello Lubo,

Yes, anger is our power and the shrunken limited self is ashamed of this power, start owning that power and makes it weak in order to rule it, to be in control.

I agree! anger is an energy waiting to be transformed and joined to the ocean of awakened life.

This is our dear mother in the head

.

I disagree, my mother is not angry or in my head. I have no quarrels with my mother in my conscious or unconscious, Anger, in my experience iis what I said; the sad “gritty” part of my existence that wants/needs “its way”, and passes as “I”, but has no intelligible voice which is why is powerless and explosive. This I notice and experience very directly, so I will not offer more resistance, pulling or pushing to anger, but, I will surrender in love and we will align and walk together. I am ok with anger, what concerns me is what I do with that energetic force. If I needed to give a ‘persona’ to anger would be “little sad girl’.

Today, I had anger arise; my body burning and spent, I tendered to it with kindness; that was the language of anger; devastation and violent wanting to say; Look at me, ”I”!!!! , but I was ready: My body slowed, and calmed, my breathing became deeper, the step lighter, the body feeling wide and deep, the heart warm: joy arsing, kindness arising, and I could tender to anger with care. Now we walk together with renewed strength, no duality.

I want you to play with the body, notice the movements of the hand, notice mam's voice coming and saying "we move the hand, this is our hand" see if this imaginary image can move the hand, see that thoughts cannot move any part on the body

My hands are moving on their own I see even as typing happens, the/my mother in the fantasy of time and memories -because she is dead- , comes up as bright and creative; she is her own fantasy, I already have my own fantasies!

Hands keep moving, they like movement!

Many thanks

Victoria

Hi Victoria,
Nice.

My hands are moving on their own I see even as typing happens

how far is see-er from the hands?
What the see-er looks like?

Is there hand 1+1 which makes movements =2
Does the hands are noun making verb 1+1=2

Love
Lubo

Hello Lubo,

I could have said: “My hands are moving on their own, I notice this even as they type”, it’s the same that I said.

I need to use the language; nouns, pronouns, adjectives, etc to make myself understood, in this case to you. I said this in a previous email.

Your questions today have been answered many times before to the previous guide; Wesley. and perhaps at times to you. Here they go again.

how far is see-er from the hands?

The "seer" is the hand.

What the see-er looks like?

Hands are skin, flesh and bones and see with touch and sense cold and heat, have a moving energy, tingle with pleasure touching earth, skin, paint. They feel hurt when cut accidentally by a knife in the kitchen, or knocked by something else.

Is there hand 1+1 which makes movements =2

When hands move it’s only hands doing their thing on their own, I notice.

Does the hands are noun making verb 1+1=2

I don’t understand the English in your question. Could you re write this question again, if you think it is important, please?

Many thanks

Victoria

Hi dear Victoria,
I read your response and noticed that you believe it was seen through the illusion.
If you want realy to see lets continue
but if you prefer to defend this believe. We can stop here.
What is your desire?

Here it is where the illusion pops-up:

I could have said: “My hands are moving on their own, I notice this even as they type”, it’s the same that I said.
I need to use the language; nouns, pronouns, adjectives, etc to make myself understood, in this case to you. I said this in a previous email.

You will never say this if the reality is seen

Your questions today have been answered many times before to the previous guide;

This doesn't mean is seen where these questions point to.

The "seer" is the hand.

WTF?

Hands are skin, flesh and bones and see with touch and sense cold and heat, have a moving energy, tingle with pleasure touching earth, skin, paint. They feel hurt when cut accidentally by a knife in the kitchen, or knocked by something else.

No, there isn't hands made by skin, flesh and blood!
Hands cannot feel anything- There is no hands :)

When hands move it’s only hands doing their thing on their own, I notice.

No there is not hands doing their on, there is no I looking hands

Could you re write this question again, if you think it is important, please?

Questions are extremity important for your investigation.
There is nothing important at all.

With Love
l.

Hello Lubo,

I sincerely think I have a long way to go, Lubo. Mainly because, unwillingly, I put the barriers to ‘seeing’, I make the stories, the labels, and the unreality, this I know.

I truly want to break through, This is my desire. I don’t want to have anything to defend, I don't really have anything to defend!

Staying honest, I often find it difficult understanding your English and get upset by the use of swear language, it doesn’t add any understanding to our communication. I don't want to offend you, I don't want to defend "me' or this existence.
.
I am invested and determined to break “I” and beyond. I am not sure if you want to guide me, though.

I look forward to your answer, Lubo.

Grateful

Victoria

Hi dear Victoria,

I am invested and determined to break “I” and beyond. I am not sure if you want to guide me, though.

I am here for you.
You deserve support.
You are already taken care of.

I put the barriers to ‘seeing’, I make the stories, the labels, and the unreality, this I know.

So wonderful to see this. yes, and it's not your fault, you are absolutely innocent and perfect.

let's go deeper here:
Notice what can be found as pure existence, love and light? Hint, notice the breathing, body...
And then notice the story about it, the owner, the conditioning?
notice what it is to free breath and body from story, from conditioning, from owner?

Love and light,
Lubo

Hello Lubo,

Many, many thanks for responding with kindness and support, may honesty, kindness, understanding and progress prevail!

Notice what can be found as pure existence, love and light? Hint, notice the breathing, body...

noticing the breathing: it’s a bit fast at the moment, the body feels tingly. Is this pure existence? May be...

Is this love and light?

can tell.

Notice the story about it

What is the story underneath the fast breathing? and the tingly body?
Excitement on your positive and kind response wanting to support me in this enquiry after so much difficulty.

The owner?

There is an emotional response to your response, but does it have an owner? All that can be found is a temporal discharge of energy in this body, and an interpretation that ‘looks’ a lot like an illusion, but no owner.

The conditioning? the more it sinks into awareness the less convincing it feels, how can so much past, stories, dreams and day dreams be credible, or have any owner… even if at times there is a grasping for the story!

notice what it is to free breath and body from story, from conditioning, from owner?

Body breathes.

With gratitude

Victoria

Hi dear Victoria,

Notice what can be found as pure existence, love and light? Hint, notice the breathing, body...

noticing the breathing: it’s a bit fast at the moment,

Fast or slow are just labels.
Notice breathing - isn't it pure existence, innocence...
notice the conditioning that you are the story about a breather
but you are breathing, existence itself?

Just delete the story from the breathing, what's left?
Is there something more than love, beingness, light?

Excitement on your positive and kind response wanting to support me in this enquiry after so much difficulty.

it is my pleasure to support you, to hold you.

There is an emotional response to your response, but does it have an owner?

oo, so cute. This is a part from the conditioning but there is no need to labeled that as wrong.
Notice the story behind the emotion? like - there is an entity with such and such story - entity is conditioning and the story is coming and sticks to the conditioning.
Notice doe's the existence, light and love are this story? or they are free from any story?

Much love
Lubo

Dear Lubo,
My computer has crashed. I am sending you this short message from my mobile. In the spirit of sunyata, will you kindly bare with me while I get another computer? It's cumbersome to do things in a mobile. I hope it can only take a few days to be back online.

With gratitude

Vijayagita