The Gate

Thought feeling trigger eachother. Often to more and more extremes.

Sensation feelings and thoughts are a response to life situation.

There is fear of the image of I tried to be mantained by great effort should be hurt, humiliated, shattered, proven wrong.
There is fear of history holding so much darkness and wrong doings that it will hit back big time sometime least excpecting it.
There is fear future holds much more pain and therefor mind runs like crazy finding danger everywhere making stories of what to beware and stay away from.


Pretty bizarre, a bit silly and sad so much energy spent on believing stories and an overactive mind working so hard to protect body and the picture of what I is.
There is nothing wrong with protecting body, but most danger is only story of danger not danger happening right now.

Oh yes, well observed.
Yes, it is a bit sad and silly, that mind is constantly trying to solve problems that its creating in order to save an image from harm.

When you look right at images in the head, what are they made of? How does an image of this room and being in this actual room differs?
What is the worst that can happen to an image?
Does the image of I, artzo, still need to be protected? If so, from what?

Keep looking, it's getting close.

Sending love

Images are made of thought.

The change between image of room in head is that it is a thought structure, often flat and lifeless.
Image of room is also based on thinking of what was in the room when last looking and then placing those objects in the thofuht-image.

Being in room is a feeling of presence, alertness of what is happening. It is experience of seeing, hearing, sensation.

The worst thing that can happen go image is, it dissapear or is replaced or similar thought image is repeated.

There is a feeling and story of needing protection from other people. Don't you know there are some pretty crazy people out there he he.

Hehe, yes, there are so many crazy people out there, in imagination!

Can you take a look and tell me, what is that needs to be protected? What is behind the wanting security?

Body needs protection, mind imagine that all situation needs to be handled to not get out of control and body gets hurt physically or something hurting the selfimage

It is all mind trying to handle life and trying to manuvuer life to get minimal hurt and maximum comfort.

Whats behind wanting security is the thought there is something that needs protecting.
All comes back to the story of what can happen to the I

Yes, there is something that needs to be protected, the question still stands, what exactly? What is in need of protection? Take a look and find the answer.


Love.

Only what is not real need protection. The story of I needs protection.

ok, what is the worst that can happen to the story about the i? does it still need to be protected?

The story could spiral down into more depression, fear and darkness.
Protecting the story feels meaningless as it only causes suffering.

Ok, good, so do you still feel that you got to protect the images in the mind? Do you need to hold on to them or is it ok to let go of trying to fit what is happening with the mind created images of what should be happening?

Do you still need to take the mind created images seriously?

Can you write more about what you notice when looking at images versus what is happening now.

If stressed or nervous it is easy to get sucked into story.
Mostly it is ok to let them go, when much fear tension stress old patterns kick in saying situation needs to be controlled.

No need to take the images seriously but sometimes it happens of it self mind saying situation needs to be taken seriously.

Images is mind creation. It happens in now but can be about anything really.
Now is life, including all.
Images appear in now may not be seen as part of what is happening but it is.
It is esay to seperate images from the real, but it is not separate from this moment.
It is a natural process depending on so many factors as all things in life.
A natural automatic respons to situation of now.
Maybe programmed by ealier condition, but is what it is right now.
It is just a thought that it should be different.

Very nice.
So how is it going in you daily life? Have you noticed any changes, is anything different? Is the search still full on?

Sending love.

There is more of a life unfolding and noticing what is happening.
The search is more or less gone, more of a rechecking how did this appear, seeing more and more it is happening of itself and when getting lost in feelings or thought faster noticing this is a thoughtbased story playing which mind gets lost in for a while.

There is not constant thinking about I. It is more impulses what wants and needs doing and then acting happens or not.
Focus happens where intrest appear it can not be hold to one thing, it just is for a bit then changing.
Mind is more relaxed. It is like the story and focusing of an I more and more falls away like it is an unnecessary component of life, just taking time and energy.
Noticing that life flows on more naturally without this constant I struggle.

In hard situation there is often same respond, same feeling and thoughts. If insulted there is still hurt.
It is patterns playing themself out, can't say it is a me controlling or managing it.don't know if it will change. Of course there is also sometimes story about change not wanting what feels bad wanting something else. That feels like a natural respons.

It is a feeling of why continue fighting struggling with finding an I, it will never be found. Or continuation is only a mindbattle, stories saying yes or no. It is not in thinking it is found or not found, cause mind can tell anything, it can keep on the battle forever saying yes there is I, no there is not I.
There is noticing of what is happening, then struggle somewhere stops and there is a shift from mind struggle yes there is ,no there is not to seeing more and more what just is and then mind relax more and story and intensity of this I story fades more and more.

Sounds to me that a shift has happened. Can you say that YES, it's clear, there is no entity I that is separate and is in charge of this bit of life? If not, what is there that is in e way of saying that Yes?

Sending love.

A gradual almost unnoticable shift.

Yes it is clear. So much the same but a slight difference as it does not belong to a me, it was only an mistaken assumption.
Feelings thought arise mostly the same as ever, except there is not the holding of it to be personal, it is like the war has been stopped, the war against what was thought to be I and the war trying to change it.

Even if there arise anything that could be described as holding on that is also a concept and story of mind which is just present for a while. Thought feeling shift like nature, sometimes wind blow sometimes not. Grass trees movement is just a natural response to what is present.

Notice it is hard to driscribe anything really with just words.

There is more eas.

Somehow it feels like now it really begins.

In language it is impossible or at least very strange not to use me and you.
So below the i me you is heavily used.

So from here I :) would line to thank you for all patience, for all kindness.for all time, for all questions, for not leaving, for poiting in the right direction, for this lifechanging gift, for this amazing oppurtunity.
It was really a hell of a ride.

If there is any uncertainty or something more you would like me to answer I am glad to do so.