would really appreciate a guide

[sikarasearth]

Hi mark
With working 10 hours a day, i haven't much time to make observations, so during my breaks and in the early morning, i put as much effort as i can into answering your questions and doing exercises. It may take me a bit longer, but im sure ill get there. Things are slowly starting to fall into place.

My body is definitely not "me"

A. Ok so you see a body (or up to half of one anyway!) Legs, pinky toe etc. Where is me? Can you find me somewhere? Now, if yes, is that a real me, or the learned idea of a me? How do you know?

I cannot find a me anywhere and it is worrying and i was a little tearful at one stage. Because i always thought i was a spirit in the body - i believed i incarnated into a body to experience life on earth. Then, when I die, ill go somewhere else. These beliefs came from reading spiritual material, which is probably all crap. If so the spiritual industry is a complete con job. Now I get scared when I think about when i die - will i be annihilated and just become nothing? But still, for some reason, there is a block up (again) and I cannot see directly that there is no Lyn. However, the more i look the more things are falling into place, so I know ill get there. What is me? Really? Ive been conditioned to think there is a me. But where is it actually, this me? No where. Maybe I am everything, but ive been told that I am this body, these thoughts, or this brain , for example. But this could be a lie, so to speak and the so called "I" could be all things.!!! I once had an experience that when the dog barked and i heard some music, it was actually me! I sometimes wonder if that wasnt a glimpse into how things really are? It went away very quickly though.

There is no lyn to become enlightened. If there is no lyn and nothing to become , surely i am already enlightened ?

B. Quite! Is there any enlightened and unenlightened, except in some people's minds (and in the rather lucrative spiritual industry!)? Is there anything other than what is happening, and what is not happening? If what is happening is 'anxiety sitting in my solar plexus region' (thanks for that frankness, by the way) then is that not what Life is doing at this moment? Can you just allow it to be there without resisting? Can you look at any labels or thoughts which come with that? Notice what they are, even write them down. Can you stay with the sensation, noticing it's quality shape and location, until this manifestation of Life moves on (and then the same again if it comes back later)? Please let me know what comes up when you do this.

Yes, the concept/labels of enlightenment/unenlightenment are just further bullcrap thought up by the mind. Just labels that cover up the truth. Not the actual direct experience. I have so many labels, beliefs concepts etc running around in my head that i cannot see the woods for the trees. In fact, my mind even seems to try to stop me from seeing directly, putting up blacks almost as if i have been conditioned/hypnotized to NOT see the truth. Enlightenment is just a word that points to the experience of seeing the world as it really is - but that is even just my interpretation of enlightenment. It could be something completely different from what i believe the word points to - i would go so far as to say words are pointless.
Is there anything other that what is happening/not happening? From my own direct observation, no. But, remembering that I can be very literal, do you mean that if you drop the thoughts, concepts worries about past and future, is there really anything but what happening right now - i would say absolutely not. However, if you mean whilst you are noticing what is happening to you there is literally NOTHING else happening anywhere to anyone else, I would have to say i do not know.
As I observe/allow my discomfort in my solar plexus area, the following labels etc rush up: negative energy, a black round blob, pain in the "solar plexus chakra" (a spiritual belief system) evil dark energy LOL fear, blackness, anxiety,
worry, thoughts of "i want this to stop (it is quite constant), why does it keep happening, fuck off etc (sorry about the swearing, but that's what the mind says.) As i laugh at and allow it to just be, it goes away. But it does come back again. I guess its just life being annoying. Or is annoying just a label? Is it just life being life?

It seems as if its already there but that i just don't see it yet

'
Deep down somewhere this is known, but the thinking, interpreting, believing and conditioning functions work night and day (well, day mostly) to cover it up, so that the senses become so dull that we stop listening to them properly, living via the concepts of things rather than experiencing them directly.

Agreed. I am going to have to put more time into experiencing life directly. Whatever that is. I think its just looking, just being? Then my senses may become a bit sharper to "what is".

C. Lets look at 'inside' and 'outside' and 'influences', whether there are such distinctions really (from my 4th question before). Can you try to think of a decision you made in the last 24 hours, one which you made totally independent of anything 'outside'? Let me know if you can find one and describe how it was totally 'inside'. Now make a decision about something. Choose between two objects? Now write down any elements which may have influenced both decisions? What convincing evidence can you find of any 'me', as opposed to Life's flow, making the choice? Let me know what you come up with, then we can look at it.

I will do this exercise tomorrow morning, because i need time to experiment.

I dont know if other things are happening whilst im observing what is happening, but i would have thought so.

D. Ok so in the here and now experience, how do you know that anything else is happening other than what apparently presents itself here and now? Yes, thoughts may tell you something, but what is actually known (as in: experienced)?

I don't know directly if anything else is happening other than what presents itself to me in the present. For example cat walks, dog plays, fan turns around, fingers type, solar plexus annoys, light annoys my eyes,cold is felt on my skin, but the thoughts say: is my daughter down the road watching tv or getting ready for bed or sleeping? I have not idea, but in my direct experience, no. This is a strange one, because does it infer that there is absolutely nothing else happening in the world? heehee

I will complete the other exercise tomorrow morning, and for now, take care.

Lynxxoo

[ElPortal]

Hi Lyn

I really enjoyed reading that post and sensing the honesty in it. It really sounds like something is going on over there.

Don't worry: earnestness is not measured in hours per day availability. It's a certain hunger and urgency not to let go until the scales have fallen from the eyes.

Looking forward to hearing the rest of your findings when you write tomorrow.

Cheers

Mark

[sikarasearth]

Hi mark

C. Lets look at 'inside' and 'outside' and 'influences', whether there are such distinctions really (from my 4th question before). Can you try to think of a decision you made in the last 24 hours, one which you made totally independent of anything 'outside'? Let me know if you can find one and describe how it was totally 'inside'. Now make a decision about something. Choose between two objects? Now write down any elements which may have influenced both decisions? What convincing evidence can you find of any 'me', as opposed to Life's flow, making the choice? Let me know what you come up with, then we can look at it.
I will do this exercise tomorrow morning, because i need time to experiment.

A decision i made in the last 24 hrs that was totally independent of anything outside was what to wear to work. It just came up and i chose what to wear. Another one was going for a walk with my dog, i just went and i dont think anything outside made me decide to do it. Well hang on, yes, i was looking at my dog, who I could tell wanted to go for a walk, so maybe yes, he was the outside influence.? i dont know about this one.
I chose between a jumper and some speakers. There is no evidence of a me, just life doing its thing.

have a good day

lyn

[ElPortal]

Hi Lyn

Ok so bear with me in a little (semi) light-heartedness. We can relax a little over this one. (The questions are serious really though):-

A decision i made in the last 24 hrs that was totally independent of anything outside was what to wear to work. It just came up and i chose what to wear.

Ok so did you choose an eskimo suit perchance? Why/why not? A grass skirt? Why/why not? Did you choose last year's colours, this years colours, a decade ago's colours, antidisestablishmentarianism colours? Did you choose ..err purple and orange? Why/why not? Did you choose to wear a polythene bag? I am relatively certain it's just 'why not' for this one. I am Did you wear a floor-length outfit? Did you wear a men's suit or a lady's outfit? In each case, why and why not? Which outfit appeared to you first in the wardrobe? Which second? Was the decision process totally internal or were there outside influences? Which part can you for definite say was 'totally independent of anything outside'? Which part can you separate out from cultural influences, learned norms, climate and weather, received values, what other people may think etc etc? See if you can find which aspects you know FOR DEFINITE are totally independent of anything outside, and list them.

Another one was going for a walk with my dog, i just went and i dont think anything outside made me decide to do it. Well hang on, yes, i was looking at my dog, who I could tell wanted to go for a walk, so maybe yes, he was the outside influence.? i dont know about this one.

With the dog walking? Can you for certain say that this was a totally inside decision? Did you walk the cat for example? Why not? Did you walk your daughter? Consider the elements of: routine, learned values that doggy needs walk each day, dog asking for walk, weather, etc etc and again tell me which elements remain that you can say for sure are totally independent of anything outside.

Have fun and report back in as much detail as you can.

Looking forward.

Mark

[sikarasearth]

Hello Mark,

oh this is going to be fun!!

A decision i made in the last 24 hrs that was totally independent of anything outside was what to wear to work. It just came up and i chose what to wear.

Ok so did you choose an eskimo suit perchance? Why/why not? A grass skirt? Why/why not? Did you choose last year's colours, this years colours, a decade ago's colours, antidisestablishmentarianism colours? Did you choose ..err purple and orange? Why/why not? Did you choose to wear a polythene bag? I am relatively certain it's just 'why not' for this one. I am Did you wear a floor-length outfit? Did you wear a men's suit or a lady's outfit? In each case, why and why not? Which outfit appeared to you first in the wardrobe? Which second? Was the decision process totally internal or were there outside influences? Which part can you for definite say was 'totally independent of anything outside'? Which part can you separate out from cultural influences, learned norms, climate and weather, received values, what other people may think etc etc? See if you can find which aspects you know FOR DEFINITE are totally independent of anything outside, and list them.

No i didnt choose an eskimo suit cos its too hot here in queensland. So weather was the influencing factor to not wear an eskimo suit. I didnt wear a grass skirt because - Influences: flabby, not socially acceptable. I wore this years colors - influences: want to follow fashion (even if very loosely), and cos i like the colors. I actually did wear a multi colored skirt that had purple and orange in it - haha. I didnt wear a polythene bag becos people would stare and again its not socially acceptable. I wore a ladys oufit because of social reasons again. A ladys outfit is appropriate to my gender and a mans isnt. First the jeans appeared then the outfit i chose. There were definately outside influences - a multitude of them: social reasons, gender reasons, fashion reasons, weather, work standards, what other people would think, trying to express my individuality as "Lyn" etc. No I cant find anything that is independant of outside inluences. This body/mind or whatever the label for it may be, is again just a programmed robot meat-suit. haha It is quite funny.

Another one was going for a walk with my dog, i just went and i dont think anything outside made me decide to do it. Well hang on, yes, i was looking at my dog, who I could tell wanted to go for a walk, so maybe yes, he was the outside influence.? i dont know about this one.

With the dog walking? Can you for certain say that this was a totally inside decision? Did you walk the cat for example? Why not? Did you walk your daughter? Consider the elements of: routine, learned values that doggy needs walk each day, dog asking for walk, weather, etc etc and again tell me which elements remain that you can say for sure are totally independent of anything outside.

It wasn't a totally inside thing. There were the following factors influencing "my" choice: my dogs crying eyes, the thought that "this is something I must do as a pet owner", the sunny weather, the heart murmur my dog has which means he must exercise, my need to feel good about myself as a responsible dog owner, social norms, etc. But what about love? is that not an inside decision? Love spurred me to walk my dog too? Is love totally independent of anything? im looking and looking and i think it is. I dont love because of fashion, social acceptance, the sunny weather etc, I just love. Could you say love can make a decision? oh shit i dont know. well yes, it could, I love my son therefore i hug him. Love influenced me to do something - the life within. What about guilt? sometimes i do stuff out of guilt - isnt that the same thing? Or are we talking about the outside influences only?
I didnt walk the cat because hed go bezerk!! and because of social restraints, i didnt walk my daughter heehee because shed kill me and because of social junk again. So i see that there are many outside influences that influence our choices, but feel that aspects such as love, guilt can influence choices independent of outside influences.

Mark! Today the meat suit was laughing and laughing at all the silly thoughts that were racing pathetically through my mind about nothing of any importance. I nearly fell off my chair at work!! haha arent we funny, getting caught up in the "drama" of our thoughts!! However, what i noticed was, when the thoughts were about fear of failure at work today, i was once again caught up in it all! oh well, that will pass. What ive noticed more is the aliveness of what is right in front of me, but only at times. I dont care, or try to hunt the experience down again, stuff just comes and goes from what ive learnt. No one is there to try to bring it back again, so why bother? Once, I saw the vividness of colors and movement! I have been sinking into "what really is" more. Then coming out again, but who cares. Life seems to be showing me stuff. That is a paradox, because i am life, but words are bumbling tools for expression i guess. Life shows me "look at the aliveness of that tree/plant" and "stop, look at the life within your meat suit friends" hahaha I can see them as just bodies with life within them pretending to be "denise" or "peter". I see them as kind of robots, with the life within them. hahaha oh , its hard to explain.
By the way Mark, what IS life? In other words, what is the suchness, as some buddhists label it? I know its a label, so i wonder what it really is. I feel like saying it is the sweetness, the love, but these are just labels again. Oh i suppose "life" is just the direct experience of what is, and i cant say what it really is, cos words are stupid.

Well i had fun and want to express my gratitude for your guidance

Lyn

[ElPortal]

Hi Lyn,

Totally lovely to read. Thank you! I can almost feel the Lyn falling away from here.

Re love and guilt. Do those need a Lyn? And are they owned by or inside a Lyn? Have a check.
How about the pain, the tightness and the dark feelings too? Do those need a Lyn?
Would it be possible that all these are just Life happening at an address known as 'Lyn'
Could it be possible that Life could have just as much fun (if not LOADS more) without the label 'I' jumping in and trying to own and control everything?
Could it be that Life (or what I am referring to as Life) is really beyond any description, and would confound any word used? Sweetness, Love, Wildness, Absolute, Aliveness: aren't they all a bit lame really?

And re death, if there is no 'me', who is there to die? What is there to cease, other than a body?

Let me know what's coming up and we'll have a look.

Cheers

Mark

[sikarasearth]

Hi mark,

Re love and guilt. Do those need a Lyn? And are they owned by or inside a Lyn? Have a check.

love and guilt dont need a lyn. i thought these were part of the life inside? they are not inside a lyn, but are felt within the body, that's all. they are just a manifestation of life and are neither here nor there. However, to be honest, im not saying they dont affect "me" still. What i mean is, i still have a lot of letting go of the Lyn to do, which is happening right now, but an on going process. So these feelings of guilt still are uncomfortable but are weakening. As for the feelings of love, they are wonderful, but neither here nor there .

How about the pain, the tightness and the dark feelings too? Do those need a Lyn?

No, they dont. But they are still ikky, but, as above, not that important.

Would it be possible that all these are just Life happening at an address known as 'Lyn'

Absolutely , thats all it is.

Could it be possible that Life could have just as much fun (if not LOADS more) without the label 'I' jumping in and trying to own and control everything?

Yep. The pretendy I is an annoyance, with its need to control by labeling, judging, thinking, blah blah blah. It will be a lot more chilled without the constant I crap.

Could it be that Life (or what I am referring to as Life) is really beyond any description, and would confound any word used? Sweetness, Love, Wildness, Absolute, Aliveness: aren't they all a bit lame really?

I would say that the Life thing is beyond anything imaginable really

And re death, if there is no 'me', who is there to die? What is there to cease, other than a body?

The only thing about death is the pain the body may feel at the time, or leading up to it. There is nothing to cease but the body. BUT what about those "people" that have left the body and continued to exist -ie: in an operating theatre (the classic NDE) where they have been able to watch what is going on, heard what is being said, how does that all fit in? Are they just pieces of life?

love

Lyn

[ElPortal]

Hi Lyn

Thanks for all that.

At the beginning of our thread we talked about expectations and fears. You may like to take a look back and re-cap.

What i mean is, i still have a lot of letting go of the Lyn to do, which is happening right now, but an on going process. So these feelings of guilt still are uncomfortable but are weakening. As for the feelings of love, they are wonderful, but neither here nor there

Is there really even anyone there to 'do a lot of letting Lyn go'? Please stay with that question for a while. Is even that an illusion? Is all that really any more than Life happening in its crazy, beautiful, awful, loving, wild way?
We said at the beginning that liberation is not about making 'the story of you' disappear, and it's not about happiness. Question: is it possible - and is it ok - for the feeling of guilt to be there and the feeling of love to be there, without there being a Lyn to own those feelings? What if these feelings are just Life happening at a location called Lyn? What if there already IS NO real Lyn there?

How about the pain, the tightness and the dark feelings too? Do those need a Lyn?
No, they dont. But they are still ikky, but, as above, not that important.

What if, at a certain moment, this is just what Life is doing? What if this is part of Life's wild ride 'chez Lyn'?

The only thing about death is the pain the body may feel at the time, or leading up to it.

Yes, the bottom line is that we don't really know (in first-hand experience, only by second-hand accounts and even that only from NEAR death experiences) what happens to the body at death. But in another sense death IS experienced every single moment: the last moment is continually being lost, sometimes painfully, sometimes not, and the present moment is lived in all its newness. The moment we lose our little baby to school etc etc. The end of a relationship. And every mundane little moment too. The same question applies: is a 'me' needed for any of this, or has Life been doing it all along without a 'me', just with the belief in a 'me' and 'my story'?

The realisation that there is, and has never been, any separate 'me' running the show, can be like a row of dominoes toppling one by one. The dawning that something much bigger is going on here than a lil individual.

OK so please tell me know what sense of Lyn the individual remains? Let's not leave any stone unturned...

Cheers

Mark

[sikarasearth]

mark

Thanks for all that.

At the beginning of our thread we talked about expectations and fears. You may like to take a look back and re-cap.

I recapped and realise that i wont be annihilated or lose my quirkiness because i was never there in the first place.

What i mean is, i still have a lot of letting go of the Lyn to do, which is happening right now, but an on going process. So these feelings of guilt still are uncomfortable but are weakening. As for the feelings of love, they are wonderful, but neither here nor there

Is there really even anyone there to 'do a lot of letting Lyn go'? Please stay with that question for a while. Is even that an illusion? Is all that really any more than Life happening in its crazy, beautiful, awful, loving, wild way?
We said at the beginning that liberation is not about making 'the story of you' disappear, and it's not about happiness.

If "I" were a jellyfish with 8 tentacles, I feel like say 3 of my tentacles are trying to hold on to a Lyn. My thoughts desperately whip around in a feeble attempt to create a substitute Lyn. "Oh", they say "Ok, maybe the Lyn is the spirit in the body" or "the Lyn is a piece of life, incarnated into the body" panting and puffing with fear, the thoughts don't want to let go. But they will. Because the more I sit there noticing, the more I will see it. The mind is also putting up blocks: "No", it says, "dont look at the fact there is no Lyn, do something else". Dont worry, i ignore the mind as much as possible. But sometimes, I might find my self doing something completely else!! hahaha Its almost as if the mind is purposely trying to stop me from seeing!!

Question: is it possible - and is it ok - for the feeling of guilt to be there and the feeling of love to be there, without there being a Lyn to own those feelings? What if these feelings are just Life happening at a location called Lyn? What if there already IS NO real Lyn there?

Yep, thats fine that i dont own the feelings. But crap its a bit sad that there's no Lyn. As I said above, the mind keeps saying "if there is no Lyn, then what IS there? I feel a bit like crying. Its all been a fruitcaking (id rather say fruitcaking than f$#king) lie.

How about the pain, the tightness and the dark feelings too? Do those need a Lyn?
No, they dont. But they are still ikky, but, as above, not that important.
What if, at a certain moment, this is just what Life is doing? What if this is part of Life's wild ride 'chez Lyn'?

Im not sure i like that side of life. But, having said that, its ok. I just allow the pain and tightness to be there, and it goes away. They, of course dont need a Lyn.

The only thing about death is the pain the body may feel at the time, or leading up to it.

Yes, the bottom line is that we don't really know (in first-hand experience, only by second-hand accounts and even that only from NEAR death experiences) what happens to the body at death. But in another sense death IS experienced every single moment: the last moment is continually being lost, sometimes painfully, sometimes not, and the present moment is lived in all its newness. The moment we lose our little baby to school etc etc. The end of a relationship. And every mundane little moment too. The same question applies: is a 'me' needed for any of this, or has Life been doing it all along without a 'me', just with the belief in a 'me' and 'my story'?

As you can see during this post, I am going from happy to sad. I am laughing at the absurdity, and sad at the no Lyn. I am just a stupid pack of beliefs and memories and automatic responses. Like today, I noticed the body
driving the car, the body walking along, the body typing - WOW what a fantastic biological robot.!!! It is so special, so miraculous!!! If there was a creator of this body, gee they are clever!! A robot designed to carry around Life so that that life could have experiences!! Once , i somehow thought that the body was a part of a me, now i see meat-suit robots, if you know what i mean.

The realisation that there is, and has never been, any separate 'me' running the show, can be like a row of dominoes toppling one by one. The dawning that something much bigger is going on here than a lil individual.

Yep, it doesnt seem to happen all at once as I actually thought it might. it slowly drops away. There's no bliss, no joy, no peace. You feel a bit different, as if something has changed, and will keep changing, I cant pinpoint it, but things are a bit nicer, a bit calmer.

OK so please tell me know what sense of Lyn the individual remains? Let's not leave any stone unturned...

It is hard to say, the mind blocks it off, but it is trying to not let go. I guess as i said above, i am trying to find a substitute for Lyn.

see ya

Lyn

[ElPortal]

Hi Lyn

Thanks for all that again. Lovely and honest.

If "I" were a jellyfish with 8 tentacles, I feel like say 3 of my tentacles are trying to hold on to a Lyn. My thoughts desperately whip around in a feeble attempt to create a substitute Lyn.

How novel: a jellyfish with 8 tentacles! Yes, thinking will always tend to be a 'selfing' mechanism, but there is a vast difference between believing them outright and having seen through the illusion they present. Once you have seen through Santa, you may enter into the game a bit, even feel the thrill of the sound of sleighbells, but basically there is no going back. Busted!

I just allow the pain and tightness to be there, and it goes away

Yes, just allow all the sensations to come and go. Who knows what Life is doing in there. It tends if anything to feel more 'raw' after seeing has happened. No need to judge, no need to push away, no need to deny apparent preferences.

The clearing away of residue and conditioning is probably a life-long adventure, but thankfully it's Life's project, not mine or Lyn's! There are some online forums that LU have for discussing those sort of things which come up.

But first here are our summing-up questions. Please take your time and answer them honestly from your present experience:-

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?
 
2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now. 
 
3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.
 
4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look? 
 
5) Do you decide, intend, choose, control events in Life? Do you make anything happen? Please try to describe the process as best you can, even if gropingly. Don't forget to give some practical examples from your experience here, Lyn (even if there is no real 'Lyn'!)
 
6) Anything to add?


Cheers

Mark

[sikarasearth]

Dear Mark,

The clearing away of residue and conditioning is probably a life-long adventure, but thankfully it's Life's project, not mine or Lyn's! There are some online forums that LU have for discussing those sort of things which come up.

Yep, "I" don't have to do anything, because there is no i. I've found that clearing up and dropping away is just happening, care of 'Life", whatever that is.

But first here are our summing-up questions. Please take your time and answer them honestly from your present experience:-

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?
 

There never was an I. Anywhere. It wasn't sitting between my eyes, looking out, as I've always thought. Oh hahaha!! It's just Life within the robot-body. In fact, if you want me to be honest, Life isnt just inside the body, life is the body, life is the space, the dog, the cat the tree etc it is all one thing!! Nothing is really separate. Oh yes, everything looks separate, body looks different to tree, tree looks different to cat, but its all just life. Just one big life.

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, when it starts and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now. 
Well, we are born with no language to label things. We are just life. Then we learn language and start labeling - society, including parents, school, peers, etc teaches us to label. We also label the I and start believing it is a separate entity. We are told there is an I, and it is reinforced and reinforced until we believe it. It is actually very reinforced through advertising and the media. I believe we would be better off without language. Because it misrepresents the truth. There are just experiences. That's how i understand it.
 

3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

It certainly isn't fireworks and eternal bliss. There's no change. Yet there is change. Life still goes on. there's a bit more peace in the fact that i'm not in control of my Life - there's no " shoulds" or "should nots", Life will do what it wants regardless. I see that i cant prevent good things or bad things from happening, cos there is no I at the helm, so why bother? I see life forms differently. Sometimes, Life seems to laugh at me from other people/animals etc saying "look at me, pretending to be Donna, Amber or Maxwell the cat". Of course, there's no "I" for Life to laugh at, but Im just trying to explain it as best I can with bothersome language. I don't know how to explain it, its just life doing its thing, having a joke. The thoughts aren't really bothersome, they are still there, but I couldn't care less about them. Nor the pain in the solar plexus. Oh God - how many times have I been to see "psychic healers" to try to get rid of that pain?? And afterwards, I wondered why it didn't go away? Oh what i waste of damn money, it was just life expressing itself as discomfort.!! No more spiritual crap for me.

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look? 

There was no last bit. It all slowly gradually came together. It was a combination of your patient pointing, and my looking and observing. Life did it, not me. I really didn't, it all came together on its own. Sorry, but there was nothing in particular that pushed me over, not that I can think of.
 

5) Do you decide, intend, choose, control events in Life? Do you make anything happen? Please try to describe the process as best you can, even if gropingly. Don't forget to give some practical examples from your experience here, Lyn (even if there is no real 'Lyn'!)
 

I dont decide, intend, choose, control. I thought I did, but with the exercises I did, I see there is obviously no me to do so, its just lovely, funny, weird life. Say I was deciding whether to go to work or stay at home. Well, there is no me to make that decision, Life will do it. I dont have to bother. hahaha Ok. now "I" am going to right now decide between a pear and watermelon. The thoughts (which are just thoughts, not controlled by me) say "mmmm fresh cold pear versus fresh cold watermelon....... eeeeerrrrrr....watermelon wins". The body, not controlled by a me, gets up and cuts up the watermelon. You see? Its just automatic, a combination of body movements/thoughts/memories/beliefs (watermelon is better for you than pears), a robot, programmed to do stuff.


6) Anything to add?
Could you say that the Life is just consciousness? I know consciousness is just a label for what truly is though, I suppose??


Love

"Lyn"

[ElPortal]

HI 'Lyn'

Thanks for all that: great!

Could you say that the Life is just consciousness? I know consciousness is just a label for what truly is though, I suppose??

Hehe, as we said earlier in our exchange, we can try to call it what we like, but words and labels can never really do it justice, can they!

I will now have some other guides take a look at your responses. They may or may not have further questions. So I'll get back to you shortly on that.

Cheers

'Mark' ;-)

[ElPortal]

Hi Lyn,

You should receive/have received a private message from me.

x

Mark

[sikarasearth]

Mark,

There is nothing i my inbox...but maybe it just hasnt arrived yet?