hello Timizu, thank you for contacting me. now let's see what you brought. just press Post Reply button and write a little about your journey and what you expect from this conversation. make a list of how you imagine this would be like after.
looking forward to hear from you.
Timizu, this one is for you
Timizu, this one is for you
See for yourself.
8-week guided self-inquiry experience → https://ilonaciunaite.com/8-week-program/
8-week guided self-inquiry experience → https://ilonaciunaite.com/8-week-program/
Re: Timizu, this one is for you
In 1975 at age 19 I had a near death experience that gave me a profound glimpse of the awakened mind/heart. This experience set the stage for a life of walking a path with heart seeking the end of suffering for myself and others. I practiced Zen in California and this brought me to Japan where I have lived for the last 30 years. I have been fortunate to experience many methods of awakening, including yoga, breath work, native American practices, Enneagram, and for the last 5 years most significantly, inquiry with The Work of Byron Katie.
I have many insightful experiences and awakened moments and also still get caught in my stories sometimes. I have experienced the beauty and joy of life without attaching to story and I would like to live there full time.
If what I have experienced so far is any indication (and I love that I don't know!) what I might expect from this conversation, this inquiry, is seeing the illusion of "me" so clearly that it cannot be a problem again. After "crossing" I really do not expect any specific "thing". "Don't know" feels good to me. And I notice that I have preferences for the quiet openness, clarity, joy and kind actions that have come when I have done The Work sincerely. And in this process I am very open to simply letting the reality of the situation inform itself of what is and is not true.
I hope this is helpful.
I look forward to hearing from you about the next step.
T.
I have many insightful experiences and awakened moments and also still get caught in my stories sometimes. I have experienced the beauty and joy of life without attaching to story and I would like to live there full time.
If what I have experienced so far is any indication (and I love that I don't know!) what I might expect from this conversation, this inquiry, is seeing the illusion of "me" so clearly that it cannot be a problem again. After "crossing" I really do not expect any specific "thing". "Don't know" feels good to me. And I notice that I have preferences for the quiet openness, clarity, joy and kind actions that have come when I have done The Work sincerely. And in this process I am very open to simply letting the reality of the situation inform itself of what is and is not true.
I hope this is helpful.
I look forward to hearing from you about the next step.
T.
Re: Timizu, this one is for you
That's beautiful, timizu. Thank you. It's a great place to be- no expectation, no knowing...
Ok, let's see where you are at. If I say, that there is no entity you, no controller, no manager, no owner, no observer of 'your' life, none as in zero, what comes up? Write what feelings and thoughts.
Thank you.
Ok, let's see where you are at. If I say, that there is no entity you, no controller, no manager, no owner, no observer of 'your' life, none as in zero, what comes up? Write what feelings and thoughts.
Thank you.
See for yourself.
8-week guided self-inquiry experience → https://ilonaciunaite.com/8-week-program/
8-week guided self-inquiry experience → https://ilonaciunaite.com/8-week-program/
Re: Timizu, this one is for you
Thank you.
Last night when I first read your message, The part about "no observer of 'your' life", struck a feeling of surprise, even a little fear and I heard in my head, "what do you mean no observer?" No awareness? I can see that the I is a story, a phenomenon, but there seems to be awareness. Then what is aware? How is this communication happening? Sitting with that fear, I noticed that it is the fear that there is nothing. Funny how the mind projects meaning onto words.
Then this morning when I read your message again, no manager, no owner, no controller, none as in zero, a feeling of relief, a sigh of relief. It feels very kind not to have to drive, and experience trust in what is. And I notice that there is something that seems to be a me experiencing that.
Last night when I first read your message, The part about "no observer of 'your' life", struck a feeling of surprise, even a little fear and I heard in my head, "what do you mean no observer?" No awareness? I can see that the I is a story, a phenomenon, but there seems to be awareness. Then what is aware? How is this communication happening? Sitting with that fear, I noticed that it is the fear that there is nothing. Funny how the mind projects meaning onto words.
Then this morning when I read your message again, no manager, no owner, no controller, none as in zero, a feeling of relief, a sigh of relief. It feels very kind not to have to drive, and experience trust in what is. And I notice that there is something that seems to be a me experiencing that.
Re: Timizu, this one is for you
Very good!
Yes, there is something aware, or in other words aware-ing is a process.. If you look around you, notice that noticing is happening all by itself. There is no noticer same way as there is no breather, no eater, no runner, just action happening, experiencing happening.
Look at language and how it is constructed:
There are labels for objects: table, car, body, thought, feeling, fear etc.
There are labels for activities: I breathe, I cough, I scratch an itch, I run, I feel. There is an object doing action according to the way that language is set. It's an assumption that has never been questioned.
If there was no language, there would not be an I. It's a label, a word that precedes other words. Car has no I and he lives happily.
Observe action today, is there a doer in the experience or just an experiencing happening + labbeing happening = story is being created. Write what comes up.
Yes, there is something aware, or in other words aware-ing is a process.. If you look around you, notice that noticing is happening all by itself. There is no noticer same way as there is no breather, no eater, no runner, just action happening, experiencing happening.
Look at language and how it is constructed:
There are labels for objects: table, car, body, thought, feeling, fear etc.
There are labels for activities: I breathe, I cough, I scratch an itch, I run, I feel. There is an object doing action according to the way that language is set. It's an assumption that has never been questioned.
If there was no language, there would not be an I. It's a label, a word that precedes other words. Car has no I and he lives happily.
Observe action today, is there a doer in the experience or just an experiencing happening + labbeing happening = story is being created. Write what comes up.
See for yourself.
8-week guided self-inquiry experience → https://ilonaciunaite.com/8-week-program/
8-week guided self-inquiry experience → https://ilonaciunaite.com/8-week-program/
Re: Timizu, this one is for you
Thanks. Enjoying this very much. Action of going to sleep is happening now. Look forward to exploring more tomorrow!
Re: Timizu, this one is for you
Somehow this came through today as a next bit for our conversation.
http://markedeternal.blogspot.com/2012/ ... e.html?m=1
http://markedeternal.blogspot.com/2012/ ... e.html?m=1
See for yourself.
8-week guided self-inquiry experience → https://ilonaciunaite.com/8-week-program/
8-week guided self-inquiry experience → https://ilonaciunaite.com/8-week-program/
Timizu, this one is for you
A wonderful day! Looking for a doer in experience and there's no doer. Labeling happening, thoughts coming and going, stories flow and like dreams they come and go on their own.
Checked Facebook and there was a post by my niece that said she was not feeling well, again. Then, as I (this is the story) was fixing breakfast painful thoughts of her and her problems started to come and instantly a beautiful feeling of love welled up to meet them. I saw that those thoughts were not about her. They had nothing to do with her. I was delighted to see that they were a story about my own pain. And instantly and even more delightfully the loving presence welled up to meet the story of a me and it just flowed to cutting the apple, cooking cereal, pouring the soy milk, boiling water, making tea, one phenomenon flowing into the next in delight, as delight.
Moved through the day and checked many times to see if there was a doer and again and again there was not. It was what I would usually refer to as a busy day. Many times there were stories featuring, "I me, mine", followed by a silent "is it true?" And still no doer. It was fun to watch as " he, me" was making copies and the machine ran out of paper and there were marks on the screen and spots from the printer, buying white out to cover the spots... all things that would usually would cause a little stress. Normally, I might take a deep breath to get centered but it was just happening, flowing flawlessly as a story of flaws; funny, delightful, unfolding in perfection.
Checked Facebook and there was a post by my niece that said she was not feeling well, again. Then, as I (this is the story) was fixing breakfast painful thoughts of her and her problems started to come and instantly a beautiful feeling of love welled up to meet them. I saw that those thoughts were not about her. They had nothing to do with her. I was delighted to see that they were a story about my own pain. And instantly and even more delightfully the loving presence welled up to meet the story of a me and it just flowed to cutting the apple, cooking cereal, pouring the soy milk, boiling water, making tea, one phenomenon flowing into the next in delight, as delight.
Moved through the day and checked many times to see if there was a doer and again and again there was not. It was what I would usually refer to as a busy day. Many times there were stories featuring, "I me, mine", followed by a silent "is it true?" And still no doer. It was fun to watch as " he, me" was making copies and the machine ran out of paper and there were marks on the screen and spots from the printer, buying white out to cover the spots... all things that would usually would cause a little stress. Normally, I might take a deep breath to get centered but it was just happening, flowing flawlessly as a story of flaws; funny, delightful, unfolding in perfection.
Re: Timizu, this one is for you
That is great report, thank you.
Ok, so story is narrating itself. Thoughts are like anchors to the stories and there is no control over that.
Does all this process require a 'me' to happen?
What is here when story shuts down for a moment?
Do you exist?
:)
Ok, so story is narrating itself. Thoughts are like anchors to the stories and there is no control over that.
Does all this process require a 'me' to happen?
What is here when story shuts down for a moment?
Do you exist?
:)
See for yourself.
8-week guided self-inquiry experience → https://ilonaciunaite.com/8-week-program/
8-week guided self-inquiry experience → https://ilonaciunaite.com/8-week-program/
Timizu, this one is for you
Last night sitting with some struggling with impulses and old stories of what is needed and the answer was sleep. Waking up today to find these answers coming for breakfast:
Does all this process require a me to happen?
This process is a story. No story, no process, no me. Me is a story. "It" is not a process. "It" is not a phenomenon. It just is, what it is, not! Not 1, not 0. What is "It"? Don't know. And in not knowing there is a knowing.
What is here when story shuts down for a moment?
Is-ness. The experience of the moment as it is. If there could be a word to describe the quality of this moment, it would be love itself.
Do you exist?
Yes, a big YES, that includes no! I exist as existence itself. I am here and here and here and here, as each moment and the infinite space that holds the moment; no separation. No expectation. Always a beginning. Yay!
Love,
T.
Does all this process require a me to happen?
This process is a story. No story, no process, no me. Me is a story. "It" is not a process. "It" is not a phenomenon. It just is, what it is, not! Not 1, not 0. What is "It"? Don't know. And in not knowing there is a knowing.
What is here when story shuts down for a moment?
Is-ness. The experience of the moment as it is. If there could be a word to describe the quality of this moment, it would be love itself.
Do you exist?
Yes, a big YES, that includes no! I exist as existence itself. I am here and here and here and here, as each moment and the infinite space that holds the moment; no separation. No expectation. Always a beginning. Yay!
Love,
T.
Re: Timizu, this one is for you
brilliant, Timizu, so happy that you are coming out nicely on the other side.
tell me, does existence itself need a 'me' to exist? is existence/ life personal in any way? if i say life, existence, reality = 1, i, me, self = 0, how does this feel?
tell me, does existence itself need a 'me' to exist? is existence/ life personal in any way? if i say life, existence, reality = 1, i, me, self = 0, how does this feel?
See for yourself.
8-week guided self-inquiry experience → https://ilonaciunaite.com/8-week-program/
8-week guided self-inquiry experience → https://ilonaciunaite.com/8-week-program/
Re: Timizu, this one is for you
how is it going?
sending love..
sending love..
See for yourself.
8-week guided self-inquiry experience → https://ilonaciunaite.com/8-week-program/
8-week guided self-inquiry experience → https://ilonaciunaite.com/8-week-program/
Re: Timizu, this one is for you
Hello Ilona,
It is going well and I have been busy with work facilitating workshops in Tokyo over this weekend. These questions feel very deep and on the edge of unknown. I have not found the opportunity to sit quietly with them yet and when I do I will send my reply. And I see that existence does not need a me to exist because when the story of me stops, existence is present as presence itself. It is not personal. The language of me, words, verbal thoughts are the same as the wind, grass, the sound of traffic on the street outside. Nothing personal. That's all for now and I will get back to you when I do. Thanks for asking.
It is going well and I have been busy with work facilitating workshops in Tokyo over this weekend. These questions feel very deep and on the edge of unknown. I have not found the opportunity to sit quietly with them yet and when I do I will send my reply. And I see that existence does not need a me to exist because when the story of me stops, existence is present as presence itself. It is not personal. The language of me, words, verbal thoughts are the same as the wind, grass, the sound of traffic on the street outside. Nothing personal. That's all for now and I will get back to you when I do. Thanks for asking.
Re: Timizu, this one is for you
Yes, you are looking right at it!
Write more when you have time to do it. :)
Sending love.
Write more when you have time to do it. :)
Sending love.
See for yourself.
8-week guided self-inquiry experience → https://ilonaciunaite.com/8-week-program/
8-week guided self-inquiry experience → https://ilonaciunaite.com/8-week-program/
Timizu, this one is for you
is existence/ life personal in any way? No. This answer just came of itself, a quiet joy bubbling up from absolute unchanging foundational stillness as needed; returning in no time, having never, actually never left source at all.
If I say life, existence, reality = 1, i, me, self = 0, how does this feel? When I first read this, it sounded like the end of the world; end of me. With a twinge of fear it felt like I would lose all my world and all the dear ones in it and the memories of me built up with the efforts of years of life, learning and growing the story of this one unique me. The I let the question go and plunged into a busy weekend of work. Strange and not strange at all, as I facilitated and did the Work of Byron Katie over the week end, me was just not there and The Work just worked, joyful, deep, effortless. Came back to your questions and saw that what had seemed to be fear was just joy in disguise, the excitement of re- cognition and not even that. So, how does it feel, reality=1, i, me, self=0? Reality feels 1, me feels zero.
If I say life, existence, reality = 1, i, me, self = 0, how does this feel? When I first read this, it sounded like the end of the world; end of me. With a twinge of fear it felt like I would lose all my world and all the dear ones in it and the memories of me built up with the efforts of years of life, learning and growing the story of this one unique me. The I let the question go and plunged into a busy weekend of work. Strange and not strange at all, as I facilitated and did the Work of Byron Katie over the week end, me was just not there and The Work just worked, joyful, deep, effortless. Came back to your questions and saw that what had seemed to be fear was just joy in disguise, the excitement of re- cognition and not even that. So, how does it feel, reality=1, i, me, self=0? Reality feels 1, me feels zero.
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