Where do I go from here?

[Anastacia42]

Hi,

I don't know & that's just thinking. Please stay with LOOKING & FEELING.

We're looking for a shift when you're sure there's no separate self. You'll see & feel things differently. Yes, spacious. etc. Similar to the examples in Gateless Gatecrashers.

Loving,

[Shubo]

Good morning Stacy,

Last night while doing some of the meditations on the audio meditations you sent there was a profound sense of peacefulness. It felt like like there was liquid butter that had orb-like quality in and around the chest. It's hard describe. Definitely felt the sensation outside the confines of the body.

It's still lingering. There's some sadness and down emotions but the peacefulness can still be found if focus put on the chest area.

Yong

[Anastacia42]

Excellent. That could be the sort of shift you're looking for.

Can you say 100% there's no self?

Loving,

[Shubo]

Can you say 100% there's no self?

No, not yet. Sometimes very close but no shift yet.

[Anastacia42]

Good. Keep looking.

Loving

[Shubo]

Still looking

[Shubo]

I can see that there's is no separate I. But I can't feel it to the bone yet. What am I doing wrong?

[Anastacia42]

Probably living in expectations, the first 4 questions asked here. You expect this to look or feel some certain way.

The shift is most likely when you're relaxed & not looking.

But your practice helps you to focus on here & now in your Direct Experience.

Just keep looking.

"Enlightenment is an accident. Meditation makes us accident prone."
Sunryu Suzuki

Loving

[Shubo]

Our mother moved in with us so it was hectic today. Didn’t have much time to practice

[Anastacia42]

Okay

[Shubo]

In the morning I meditate for an hour. During the day and night I ask "Where am I" and look and see that there's only open space/awareness. While walking the dogs. While driving. At work try to take a break and ask the question. At night I work on the audio meditations/practice you sent. Some time just meditate too.

Does this sound ok?

While cycling today I was wearing a helmet an sunglasses and in this case it seemed like I-ness was confined in my head. I tried to remind myself these feelings arose in the consciousness but still doing this while pedaling, puffing and the head confined in the helmet made it difficult.

[Anastacia42]

Yes, as long as you're relaxed. If you find yourself stressing & straining, take a break.

What would "feel it to the bone" be like?

Loving

[Shubo]

What would "feel it to the bone" be like?

That's a good question. To have some kind of shift in perception. To feel oneness?

There's some kind of dissonance/confusion here:
When I look for "me" there's a flash of the word me in the chest. It's just a label and clearly there is nothing there.
Same thing with "self" or "myself".
Same with when looking for I as in "where is I"
But asking "where am I" is a whole different story. "I am" seems to be everywhere and nowhere in particular. And yet, the walls, the objects in the field of view, people around don't seem to be part of this "I am" sense.

[Anastacia42]

Is it accurate to say one way of looking takes you to "nothing." And the other way of looking takes you to "everything? "

If so, both are true. It's just paradox. Right?

But that's thinking. LOOK

Loving,

[Shubo]

Still looking…