Pre-Awakening

[Bananafish]

Hm, does that mean everything is done automatically? Like we are all automatons?

Please do the previous experiment of rising the hand again, and look into the relationship
between "is-ness" and the movement of the hand.

[Statum]

Hm, does that mean everything is done automatically? Like we are all automatons?

Please do the previous experiment of rising the hand again, and look into the relationship
between "is-ness" and the movement of the hand.

Instead of automatons, it may be more akin to the leaves on a tree having color. Do they have color automatically? That might be one way to say it, but really the color is inseparable from the leaves. There isn’t a space between the color of the leaves and the leaves themselves.

So the “is-ness” is the space where the movement of the hand takes place. Like a leaf is where color takes place or color is where leaf takes place. Ok too much thought again.

I guess the movement of the hand starts and stops, but the “is-ness” can’t be said to start or stop or anything.

[Bananafish]

Hi Statum. :)

Found some wonderful reflections in your reply.
As you say, that still seems to be thoughts about "is-ness," but
is it actually so?

Please keep observing what you call "is-ness," and
report what comes up. Please don't hesitate to say so when you are
stuck with the inquiry.

Best wishes,

Kento

[Statum]

Found some wonderful reflections in your reply.
As you say, that still seems to be thoughts about "is-ness," but
is it actually so?

Please keep observing what you call "is-ness," and
report what comes up. Please don't hesitate to say so when you are
stuck with the inquiry.

So the “is-ness” hasn’t changed, but something has changed in that I now feel that I’m looking for “is-ness”. So the “is-ness” feels like intellectually grabbing for “is-ness”. But when I stop, it’s like I never started; everything that is remains “is”.

The grabbing for “is-ness” felt like fear; like unless I catch it, it will slip away and I will be alone with nothing to comfort me. It felt like frustration at trying to not try and get myself to relax like I wasn’t actively trying to relax.

[Bananafish]

the “is-ness” feels like intellectually grabbing for “is-ness”

Ok, and as you thoroughly investigate what "is-ness" is, what would you say about
the real nature of what you have called "is-ness" so far?

[Statum]

Ok, and as you thoroughly investigate what "is-ness" is, what would you say about
the real nature of what you have called "is-ness" so far?

It just simply is what it is and couldn’t be otherwise. It’s always “here”, but can’t be pinned down or pointed to. It can’t be described like an object among other objects. It doesn’t have an opposite. And there is a feeling of gratitude and relief when it is noticed.

[Bananafish]

Ok, please investigate this "always" carefully, while you thoroughly observe
what you call is-ness.

Careful not to mix up something you make up as "is-ness"
and what the word is really pointing at. In a most tangible, non-metaphysical manner of
description, what is "is=ness"? Would you be ale to explain it to a 8-year-old child?

Feel it again and again, please and report.

Warm wishes,

Kento

[Statum]

Ok, please investigate this "always" carefully, while you thoroughly observe
what you call is-ness.

Careful not to mix up something you make up as "is-ness"
and what the word is really pointing at. In a most tangible, non-metaphysical manner of
description, what is "is=ness"? Would you be ale to explain it to a 8-year-old child?

Feel it again and again, please and report.

There is a desire to look at what other people have said about it to know that I’m “getting it right”. There is anxiety at the inability to explain what it is.

Feeling it again, it feels like frustration. Tightening my mouth, furrowed brow, pressure behind the eyes.

Feeling it again, it feels like sadness. Feeling a lump in the back of my throat. An empty feeling in the stomach and chest.

I don’t feel that I can describe it without making something up to sound as though I’m right or make myself feel better. I could say it is awareness, emptiness, space, nothingness, everything, but all of that is nonsense that I would say just because other people have used those words. I feel that I’m stuck with just saying I don’t know.

[Bananafish]

I feel that I’m stuck with just saying I don’t know.

Ok, let's get it down slowly. How is that "stuck-ness" felt?
Is it something separate from what you call "is-ness"?

Please report how being stuck is felt, observing the sensations that relate to it.

[Statum]

Ok, let's get it down slowly. How is that "stuck-ness" felt?
Is it something separate from what you call "is-ness"?

Please report how being stuck is felt, observing the sensations that relate to it.

There is tightening in my stomach, chest, and throat. There is pressure behind the eyes and the feeling of a furrowed brow.

[Bananafish]

Ok, please see them one by one, and see how they are different from
what you call is-ness. It feels to me that this is a crucial point to have a look at.

Please go slowly and steadily with this.

[Statum]

Ok, please see them one by one, and see how they are different from
what you call is-ness. It feels to me that this is a crucial point to have a look at.

Please go slowly and steadily with this.

As I looked, it felt that each of them were connected to the other like they were one pillar of energy/vibration. As I closed my eyes to feel it more vividly, there was the sense that there was no body, just the energy/vibration happening “inside” or “behind” what I considered myself. I looked closer and I couldn’t find “inside”, it was just “here”. I could not draw any distinction between “is-ness” and what was felt.

I noticed a sense of separation between this energy and the sounds happening around me though, so the “is-ness” extended into the sounds happening around me too. I felt into the space between what was “inside” and what was “outside”. It was all happening “here”. I felt into “here” and could not tell if the feeling was emptiness or presence.

[Statum]

Ok, please see them one by one, and see how they are different from
what you call is-ness. It feels to me that this is a crucial point to have a look at.

Please go slowly and steadily with this.

I also couldn’t not find any edges to “here” and any difference between “here” and “is-ness”.

[Bananafish]

Ok, Statum. How does it feel to discover that?

P.S.
I'm now offering free video-chat sessions for free. Please let me know in case you're interested.

[Statum]

Ok, Statum. How does it feel to discover that?

P.S.
I'm now offering free video-chat sessions for free. Please let me know in case you're interested.

There were feelings of vastness and connection. There was a feeling of stillness and even a feeling of silence. A phrase comes to mind that “this is all there is”. At the thought of this phrase, there is a feeling of fear.

And yes I would be interested in video-chat if it is available. I am on Central Standard Time and just have my phone to communicate with, but if we can find a time that is convenient for you, that would be good with me.