Hi Harry
Please see my responses:
Again – please excuse my dualistic language:
This is great to hear! This might be a language thing, but just to check…
Is there a self who feels confident, has tools, and challenges an illusion? Or is this also part of the ‘me’ story?
Just a language thing – it is hard to explain situations without referring to “I” - there is No separate Self - I was trying to get across that I have learnt a great deal from the exercises which has taught me to inquire into direct experience & to validate that there is No Self in any experience - I have also learnt to not to speculate on the unknown & used evidence based enquiry on what is actually SEEN
Try to stay as close you can to experience and away from thinking for these.
Here’s the rest of the questions…
3) How does it feel to see that there’s no self? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.
In the “ Got It “ State which I am spending more & more time it feels expansive - because the “me” character dialogue can be SEEN as complete nonsense it is quickly challenged & then subsides – what is left is an expansive feeling , with no limits with a background feeling of peace – there is no seperation from inside to outside & there is a very subtle feeling of happiness as well - everyday moments are more involved in which I am present & in the Now - in this state there are no worries & no concerns - in fact simple activities take on a depth & more is noticed in the environment. Especially times on my own in nature have become wonderful moments where even the environment seems more vibrant. In essence I feel I am not limited by a false identity as much
4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?
I am not in a permanent “ Got It” State so I feel there is so much more to do - however I am spending more time in that state – basically it is the exercises & the constant enquiring into the validity of a separate self – every spare moment I am asking if there is separate “me” where is it located? - is there a “me” in this particular experience ? – because it can never be found , the idea now seems ridiculous - the false identity is a thought , a memory so how can that perceive a Direct Experience ? this is what I ask all the time - constant enquiry into direct experience is helping me SEE & the SEEING is always available
The next lot of questions are quite similar to each other
5) Describe decision & give examples from experience.
Initially it appears that “I “ am making decisions such as the hand exercise in which “I” flip the hand over - however during deeper investigation it can be clearly SEEN that there is no “me” & no “Decider” – the hand is moving with no involvement & appears to be happening on its own - this is clearly SEEN & No Self can be found
Describe intention & give examples from experience.
Describe free will & give examples from experience.
Describe choice & give examples from experience.
If you don’t mind – I’ll answer these together – it’s exactly the same - Free Will means we can choose whatever direction we wish to take at any moment in time - again Initially it appears that this is the case – I have tried this out whilst walking in which a different route is taken quickly - however when “I” investigate into this further No “ Doer” , No “Chooser” No “Decider” can ever be found – it appears to be Just Happening & this can be clearly SEEN - there is No “me” directing the show
Describe control & give examples from experience.
There is No Control - the “me” character is just a thought so how can it control anything ? - the illusion of control is there sometimes when I am identified – however when I am in the “Got it” State it is clearly SEEN that there is No “ Controller” - particular apparent whilst doing physical activities like walking , running , driving etc
What makes things happen? How does it work?
Tbh – “I” don’t know - the exercises have taught “me” not to speculate on the unknown & just deal with Direct Evidence based on what is SEEN not on the theories about it – Since then “I” do not allow “myself” to go down this path - these enquiries are about Facts & Truths on what is actually experienced and SEEN on a moment by moment basis & not on theories or speculation
What are you responsible for? Give examples from experience.
Nothing !! - this one is a tough one tbh – I have children, elderly parents , close friends & this exercise “I” am still working through - there is No “Me” & No “You” so there is no-one to be responsible for - this is clearly SEEN during the exercises but still being worked through during life situations
6) Anything to add?
Yes - “I” have made a lot of progress but “I” know there is a lot more to do – I would like to thank you very much for your assistance in helping me point me in the right direction - These exercises have laid a solid foundation from me to build upon in which “I” investigate into the validity of a “No Self” - I flip between the “Got It & Lost It “ States however I am spending more & more time in the “ Got It” State – my night time anxiety attacks have dropped substantially since I started these exercises & when my mind is active on some occasions this is a golden opportunity for me to do the exercises
