Giving this a try

[Jadzia]

Noone and nothing.

Sender isn't the agent and experiencer of life, so what is that what tempts?
You can say noone is tempted, that isn't wrong, and yet there is something. You can say no one has a habit, that isn't wrong but still there is a habit. There is something offered by thoughts in a habitual way.
Do you see that?
It is a bit like, sorry, regurgitation, same thoughts appearing again and again.
Sender doesn't think the thoughts, still they are there.
Accepting a habit as habit is valuable. Being on the look out for this habitual patterns and recognize them for what they are is beyond helpful.

No proof that the thought of the sensation or the sensation (both are the same thing in a way) started the sequence.

Right, there can't be any proof found that thought or sensation start something.

I feel like toying with the notion of sequence e.g. coming up with scenarios and checking the effect they have, but that would be me trying to get this intellectually.

Here we talk of a belief, an illusion, that either sensations are triggered by thoughts or thoughts by sensation and reaction by any of the two. The lovely belief in cause and effect, which as you wrote needs the concept of time and that different things are connected which each other in some mysterious way: Something has to happen before something else to be able to talk about a reaction.

No thought about initiating. There can be lack of vigilance and the 'watching' can turn into 'thinking'/entering content. I might be starting to get a better idea of what this watching is.

Sometimes there are thoughts like: "I am going to lift my arm", did you look for thoughts like that?

t cannot be proven that thoughts have any power. It can not be proven that they can affect or create an outcome. Making associations is something that happens (to nobody and for nobody). I am writing this in a (nicely) dispassionate way and there is/was the expectation that certainty would feel different.

Right.
There is the habitual connecting the dots happening in thoughts, just this.
What is the expectation about how certainty should feel?

It does not lift. The justification that appears is that it did not lift because you wrote "think "lift hand"" instead of "lift hand", but in any case there is no proof that the thought causes the lifting. I have read about how people describe this in terms of there being a delay between the thought and the manifestation, but this does not resonate. Even if I could literally see a thing called thought doing something in front of 'me', it does not prove something.

Sure there will appear, sort of in light speed, a whole battery of thoughts with lots of interesting ideas why the hand didn't lift. This is what thoughts do, they do offer explanations.
If the thought would have some power/be the instigator of movement the arem would always rise.

I don't know. There are feelings about Sender right now. Mostly what one could call compassion or pity. Sender is seen as a vehicle to understand and end suffering, and that makes me feel bad for wanting to 'use' her in that way. Again, however, this seems to be a different kind of work.

Sender is a character in a story like Picard is a character in a story, or Huckleberry Finn.
If you watch a series or read a book do you feel compassion with a character too, or sometimes pity him or her?
You do, right?
Same here, Sender can be loved deeply and be cared for, the unfolding of the story watched with curiosity, compassion.
The vehicle idea is merely a story line in the main story. Sender isn't a vehicle, just a character, no need to feel bad for using her. :-)

'There are feelings about Sender right now'----> these 'feelings about Sender' are a sensation.

The interest in Sender will stay.

My understanding of 'watching' is that it means staying with the sensation. Not lingering on it or try to understand it. Just letting it unroll. If I try to see where the sensation starts and where it ends I go into visualisation/interpretation.

Ok, it could be called observing, too, or?
It is something gentle just to watch without interfering or wanting to change something, no repair needed, just observing something unfolding and disppearing again.

Mull all of this over again.

You read a lot, that has its pros and cons. Reading about these topics can make for a lot of expectations, just be aware of that and make sure that the knowledge of others don't get in the way of you experiencing what is. Ok? Just have a friendly eye on it.

Love,
Jadzia

[Sender]

There is something offered by thoughts in a habitual way.
Do you see that?

Yes and it does not hit at the same spot anymore. There is some sort of diffusion which can make it easier to stay with the sensation that is to be looked at (or 'what is looking').

No thought about initiating. There can be lack of vigilance and the 'watching' can turn into 'thinking'/entering content. I might be starting to get a better idea of what this watching is.

Sometimes there are thoughts like: "I am going to lift my arm", did you look for thoughts like that?

There can be a thought like 'typing will happen', but no thought/decision about when or how to place my arms on the keyboard or whether I will e.g. scratch/hold my head while doing that, or when I will pause.

What is the expectation about how certainty should feel?

When I wrote that maybe I was expecting something like an unshakeable deepening out of which thoughtless(?) actions/words would come out. It sounds pretty terrible in hindsight. I now remember Katie Byron's appreciation of the 'don't know' mind.

Ok, it could be called observing, too, or?

Yes, observing/noticing. My experience is that 'I' cannot 'turn around' and look (after all !). This thought just triggers the 'spirit in a body' story. Maybe it would be fair to say that I expected whatever observes an external object/sensation to start observing increasingly subtle internal objects, but this reference point is not needed (or, this is what is to be noticed/ to be let unfold actually - not by me but by the absence of me). I might be having too much fun playing with words here.
Will keep practicing. Thank you.

[Jadzia]

There is some sort of diffusion which can make it easier to stay with the sensation that is to be looked at (or 'what is looking').

Could you have a closer look into the sort of diffusion?
What exactly is it?

There can be a thought like 'typing will happen', but no thought/decision about when or how to place my arms on the keyboard or whether I will e.g. scratch/hold my head while doing that, or when I will pause.

Again, does this thought 'typing will happen' has any influence if action happens or not. Look like a hawk.
And yes there are hardly ever thoughts about how exactly the action has to be done.

When I wrote that maybe I was expecting something like an unshakeable deepening out of which thoughtless(?) actions/words would come out.

Nice term: thoughtless actions and words. Always keep in mind thoughts are never the problem, believing all kind of thoughts can be.
Go on having an eye on decisions and choices - is Sender the decider or chooser?

This thought just triggers the 'spirit in a body' story. Maybe it would be fair to say that I expected whatever observes an external object/sensation to start observing increasingly subtle internal objects, but this reference point is not needed (or, this is what is to be noticed/ to be let unfold actually - not by me but by the absence of me)

If you close your eyes and follow the sensations called body - is there an inside and outside of the body?
If you look at something, any object - what tells you that you, the subject is any different from the object seen?

Love,
Jadzia

[Sender]

Could you have a closer look into the sort of diffusion?
What exactly is it?

It is just another way to talk about letting go of thoughts, even though you have said that this is not the point. It is a thought about letting go of images/thoughts, only instead of letting them go, they are let to dissolve as if seen via a kaleidoscope. Very imaginative.

Again, does this thought 'typing will happen' has any influence if action happens or not. Look like a hawk

I can look by trying to remember what took place. It was more like an 'I want to reply and typing will happen'. There is writing in spite of thought, not because of it.

I can also look at the nail biting that happens. I have been doing this since I was a child, then there have been long pauses and it started again a couple of months ago, maybe less than that. So I look at it while it happens. I want it to stop. There is fear of judgement, thoughts about effect on teeth, finger joints etc. My watching consists of following movement and looking for the controller/nail&hand owner. Even though these can appear to happen simultaneously, they don't?
Not sure where I am going with this.

Go on having an eye on decisions and choices - is Sender the decider or chooser?

Sighing happened withought thinking. No negative connotations with sighing, so no fearful story about it appears. Did Sender do it? Maybe it was a natural act of releasing. Nail biting can be that as well without believing a story of "should not be happening".

If you close your eyes and follow the sensations called body - is there an inside and outside of the body?

A sigh or sound feels as though it comes out of the body. In order for that to feel real, the image of lungs producing air that goes out through a tube should be believed in. With eyes closed, it is easier to see that sensations just appear. The 'in the body' story requires imagination.

If you look at something, any object - what tells you that you, the subject is any different from the object seen?

I think the story that 'this is my body' and the historically associated felt sensations tell me that. I see a pillow in front of these hands that are typing. Room temperature can be felt in these hands. If I touch the pillow, it is cool too. There is the belief that whatever is felt involuntarily is within the body, which is my body.

[Sender]

My last post is quite something. Physical alteration can and does happen.

whatever is felt involuntarily is within the body

I don't really know what I meant by that. The voluntary/involuntary dichotomy is similar to (or maybe the same as) the expected/unexpected one. In any case, it doesn't make much sense right now.

If you look at something, any object - what tells you that you, the subject is any different from the object seen?

There is projected distance and even texture or temperature. In a way, if I can walk towards it, it is separate/different. Without the projection of space or without defining a surface as the floor/walls, the objects could be floating.

[Sender]

If you look at something, any object - what tells you that you, the subject is any different from the object seen?

what can be seen/thought/heard/sensed is not me

[Jadzia]

Sorry, I missed your post yesterday.

they are let to dissolve as if seen via a kaleidoscope

Interesting. It sure can be helpful in case the story gets overly pulling.

I can also look at the nail biting that happens. I have been doing this since I was a child, then there have been long pauses and it started again a couple of months ago, maybe less than that. So I look at it while it happens. I want it to stop. There is fear of judgement, thoughts about effect on teeth, finger joints etc. My watching consists of following movement and looking for the controller/nail&hand owner. Even though these can appear to happen simultaneously, they don't?

This is a question for you to answer. ;-)
When does thought claims to have started the question before, during or after the action?

With eyes closed, it is easier to see that sensations just appear. The 'in the body' story requires imagination.

With eyes closed one sees that sensations just appear and disappear. To name where the sensations are requires imagination/thoughts/memory. Yes.
Sit and close your eyes. Give yourself some time to get tuned into the sensations floating around, don't heed what thoughts babble about.
Can you with 100% conviction say that there are sensations inside the body?
If you focuse on the connection bumm/chair are there two sensations bumm and body or is there just one sensation? Again don't heed thoughts.

If you look at something, any object - what tells you that you, the subject is any different from the object seen?
what can be seen/thought/heard/sensed is not me

It doesn't quite answer the question, give it another try. Look out for explaining thoughts and check what can really be found in DE.

Love,
Jadzia