Getting Glimpses

[Jissi]

I was stuck in the Buddhist paradigm; it took a while to get that it's OK for awareness and consciousness to merely be labels. I had kind of put them on a pedestal

[Ghata]

Dear Jissi,

sweet :-).

Are there any more questions?

If not, are you ready for what we call the final questions? They are a possibility to find out whether there are any unclarities left.

Sending love,
Ghata

[Jissi]

No npmore question. But I feel like I'm facing final exams! ;-)

[Ghata]

Dear Jissi,

this exam is special. You can't fail :-)

Please write your preliminary answers into a text document on your ipad and the final answer here, otherwise it might be very confusing for other people reading the answers. Again, answer from direct experience and take your time.


Here are the questions:

1) Is there a separate entity 'self', 'me' 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

2) Explain in detail what the illusion of separate self is, and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully as you see it now.

3) How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the past few days.

4) What was the last bit that pushed you over, made you look?

5) Do you decide, intend, choose, control events in Life? Do you make anything happen? Please try to describe the process as best you can, even if gropingly. Don't forget to give some practical examples from your everyday experience (even if there is no real 'you'). What are you responsible for?

6) Anything to add? (This is the place where sometimes uncensored stream-of-consciousness, exhuberent outbursts about what this whole thing feels like, are par for the course, and largely a good idea really!)


Sending love,
Ghata

[Jissi]

FINAL QUESTIONS
# 1 Is there a separate entity, 'self', 'me', 'I', at all, anywhere, in any way, shape or form? Was there ever?

No. There is no separate entity, 'self', 'me' 'l' at,all, anywhere, in any shape or form, and there never was.

There is only the temporary coalescence, under (always changing) causes and conditions, of the various automatic processes of life unfolding--hands hand-ing,kidneys kidneying, thoughts and decisions making themselves known, etc. We give this the label 'I' as a function of language, in order to communicate through language.

[Jissi]

FINAL QUESTION #2

Explain in detail what the illusion of a separate self is, and how it works from your own experience. Describe it fully, as you see it now.

There is a felt sense of 'I' that appears to function in the world and carry out the activities of living. Once it is seen that everything is just functioning automatically, this illusion can be seen through. In the early days of realization, this selfing continues, but it is known to be a fabrication.

There is a belief that 'I' am turning on the faucet, that 'I' control the decisions I make, that 'I' dictate that one foot follows the other in walking.

Once it is seen that everything, that life is just functioning automatically, this illusion falls away. At this early ep stage or realization, the 'selfing' continues but it is known to be a fabrication.

[Jissi]

FINAL QUESTION #3

How does it feel to see this? What is the difference from before you started this dialogue? Please report from the last few days.

I feel hugely happy, lighter in the world, giddy from time to time. But also realistic, knowing that things will change, then change again. And again.

I'd been so close for days, walking around with a huge smile on my face, feeling wonder at the world just worlding and the people just people-ing. When that moment of absolute clarity hit, I felt wondrous, gratified, *astonished* that I'd been able to have this experience.

Before and after I started this dialogue:
Nothing is different; everything is different. I know that this is a permanent shift for me. There were a couple of brief moments of self doubt (causes and conditions), but they resolved themselves easily. I have confidence that things are as they should be. I had a recent important personal loss, and was able to see that given all the causes and conditions in play, things could *only*'have turned out as they did, and I found acceptance.

I see the world differently, warmly. I am kindly disposed to people the vast majority of the time. (Of course this will come and go; it's only been eleven days since the shift, so the world will bring me all kinds of experience as time unfolds.)


FINAL QUESTION #4

What was the last bit that pushed you over?

1. Automaticity
2. Ghata saying, "It is all right that [seeing no self] is [still] at an intellectual level
3. Ghata saying, "Turn the focus outward" [which enabled me to see the automaticity in the entire world, this after I'd really been focusing on the direct experiencing of physical sensations]. Noticing that *looking*, too, was on automaticity...

[Jissi]

FINAL QUESTION #5

Do you decide, intend, choose, control events in life? Do you make anything happen? Please describe the process as best you can...Don't forget to give practical examples from your everyday experience...What are you responsible for?

As the process unfolded, it became clear that the world was running itself with no help from me. First I noticed that my arms and hands were just running the process of washing dishes all by themselves. It took a couple of days for it to become clear that decisions were also just making themselves. And then I realized that looking, too, was automatic-for the last couple of days before the shift, I couldn't not look. Sounds simply make themselves heard (my favourite part); hunger makes itself known, or not; objects made up of colours are seen: chocolate is tasted-no effort on my part, no control, decision, intention. The brain simply secretes thoughts. The fingers are simply typing this answer. 'I' am not responsible for any of this.

[Ghata]

Dear Jissi,

thank you for the answers :-). Some other guides will look over our dialogue to make sure we covered everything. That may take a day or two.

Sending love,
Ghata

[Jissi]

FINAL QUESTION #6

Anything to add?

Most of what I have to say seems to have surfaced in the first five answers. However: The world is just verb-ing along, streams emerging and fading away like waves in the ocean...Relief that the driver's seat is empty...enormous gratitude that the illusion of self was seen through... Ghata is a wonderful guide. She kept me focused on the central question, is there a self, I, me, anywhere, and was there ever?

The actual seeing process developed on its own over a couple of days and then crept up on "me" within several hours. I could not not look; looking just was. And then I was typing, yet again, that I was so close but couldn't SEE it, fingers just typing of their own accord, when suddenly there was just brilliant clarity and there it was. No.

There.is.just.nothing there! An I had to go back and retype what had been written, to post it on the Forum.

And giddiness, joy, astonishment that it had been seen, and knowing that this cannot be unseen. Period. Nothing was different. Everything is different. I think everything's been written in my first five answers. Two last things-meditation, even when it's been challenging, just flies by. I'm always surprised when the timer rings. Finally,

I saw nothing until I saw nothing. :) <3

And this is just the *beginning*.

[Ghata]

Dear Jissi,

There are no more questions from other guides.

Welcome home :)

I would like you to look into one more thing.

The world is just verb-ing along, streams emerging and fading away like waves in the ocean..

So beautifully said. :)

Now have another look. So far you have been saying, that all this happens automatically.

Can the automaticity be watched? Or is it an interpretation of the world world-ing, just as much as it was an interpretation that YOU were thinking and experiencing?

What remains when you take all interpretations away?

Sending love,
Ghata

[Jissi]

Sharp eyes, you have! No, here too the looking process just happens. :-)

[Jissi]

"Watching the automaticity" is another label.

[Jissi]

An interpretation. I was,pretty drained by the experience of reviewing the process the night before, and then putting together the six answers :-)

[Ghata]

Dear Jissy,

lovely.

By the way, "life happens" can be a label as well.

The world worlding .... that is enough. There is no need to explain it either way.

Welcome to the land of not knowing :-)

Sending lots of love,
Ghata

P.S. You will receive a pm on Facebook from me and I will add you to the Group Aftercare. See you there! :-)