I am looking for all the help I can to be self-realized.

[abrakamowse]

Hi Daniel,

Hello Peter,

Did you look up all the right answers haha?

:-P

TBH, I didn't look up for them, but, I am reading the book The Zen of Advaita (part 1 and part 2) and really helped me a lot to clarify a lot of things, and your questions helped me as well.
The book is written on the teachings of Nisargadatta Maharaj. And I am pretty mind blown by reading it.
hehehe...

Is this really your experience?

Ok, you got me in this one. You are right. Is not my experience. That's an idea I had.
In my experience "I" (the I thought) just perceive the thoughts appearing and dissapearing.

Do you feel relief now it is clear this "seperate I" does not exist after all?

Yes, a lot really... thanks Peter.

Do you belief in Santa? (I am just curious)

Well, yes... we follow the Santa Claus tradition in my country. I believed in him until I was like 7 I think.
But in my country we call it different, his name is "Papa Noel" that it means "Father Noel". In all latin america is known with that name, not sure why. Now living in New Jersey I get used to Santa Claus hehehe...

Is the search over now?

I think so... (hehehe... kidding) I don't think.
:-P


Yes, it's over.

And is it well done, medium or rare?

Very well done.

Warm Regards, Petrus

Thank you so much Peter!!!
:-)

[Petrus]

Hi Daniel,

Why are you reading books if your search is over?

Warm regards, Petrus

[abrakamowse]

Hi Daniel,

Why are you reading books if your search is over?

I am a book "eater" hehehe... I like to read a lot. I read books about Zen, Philosophy, etc but I also read science fiction, detective novels, history, humor, the newspaper, hehe...anything that helps spark the imagination is welcome.
:-)

Warm regards, Petrus

Regards for you too Peter!

[Petrus]

Hi Daniel,

I reread the thread and saw this again:

I understand that there's no self, but I don't "see" it. In my experience there's no one, but I feel like is intellectual.

I am still not sure if there is a shift in this in your case.
Can you elaborate on this?

Warm regards, Petrus

[abrakamowse]

Hi Daniel,

I reread the thread and saw this again:

I understand that there's no self, but I don't "see" it. In my experience there's no one, but I feel like is intellectual.

I am still not sure if there is a shift in this in your case.
Can you elaborate on this?

Warm regards, Petrus

Hi Peter, you are smart. I think my ego is giving up. There's an understanding a very deep understanding that there's no self, but that's not enough for the shift to happen.

I try to lie to myself (to the non-existent self) that I am enlightened, but for some reason nothing changes.

Some time ago I had a very strong experience that shocked my ego a lot, I even was in a psychiatric hospital because I thought I was crazy. After that, I began to study Zen and do meditation and that gave me an understanding of what was happening, but somehow my beliefs accommodate to that new situation and I feel like the no-self idea is like another belief.

There's no one to be frustrated, but my ego feels frustrated.
:-(

[Petrus]

wow that is good news
i have no time right now, will answer properly later

Thanks Daniel!

[abrakamowse]

No problem Peter!

Thanks!

[Petrus]

Hi Daniel,

It takes great courage to be honest.
Thank you for that honesty.

I think my ego is giving up.

If you see there is no ego anywhere (ok maybe some thoughts refer to something like that, but in reality there is not such a thing), he cannot give itself up: it never was there.
The other option (if he really is there): kill him, haha.

I try to lie to myself (to the non-existent self) that I am enlightened,

If you look at this sentence well, can you see how crazy that sounds?
There are 2 I's here. One is lying to the other that he is enlightened.
Have a close look and see if you can find 1 of these 2 anywhere.
Tell me if you have found one.

but for some reason nothing changes.

Nothing will happen. Ever!

Some time ago I had a very strong experience that shocked my ego a lot, I even was in a psychiatric hospital because I thought I was crazy. After that, I began to study Zen and do meditation and that gave me an understanding of what was happening, but somehow my beliefs accommodate to that new situation and I feel like the no-self idea is like another belief.

Just forget about everything for 5 seconds. Take a deep breath. What is left?

There's no one to be frustrated, but my ego feels frustrated. :-(

There is no one and no ego that is frustrated. There is frustration.
If there is frustration, there is frustration. No need for an I or an ego. Just let frustration be.

One time I heard somebody who gave satsang tell the following:
"Everybody thinks I am giving satsang here, because my spiritual journey succeeded.
But the contrary is true: it is because my spiritual journey totally failed"
After that he laughed for 5 minutes.

I liked that very much.
So congratulations your journey failed. So far, so good.

Warmest regards, Petrus

[abrakamowse]

Hi Daniel,

Hi Peter!

It takes great courage to be honest.
Thank you for that honesty.

It wasn’t me who was being honest… Lol…
:-)

I think my ego is giving up.

If you see there is no ego anywhere (ok maybe some thoughts refer to something like that, but in reality there is not such a thing), he cannot give itself up: it never was there.
The other option (if he really is there): kill him, haha.

It’s dead hehehe…

I try to lie to myself (to the non-existent self) that I am enlightened,

If you look at this sentence well, can you see how crazy that sounds?
There are 2 I's here. One is lying to the other that he is enlightened.
Have a close look and see if you can find 1 of these 2 anywhere.
Tell me if you have found one.

Aren’t we all crazy? hahaha…

Ok, I have a new discovery to share.

“No being has ever entered Nirvana...”
—— Nisargadatta Maharaj

but for some reason nothing changes.

Nothing will happen. Ever!

Ok, maybe here is my misunderstanding. I found online a woman called Lisa Cairn, and the way she explains everything is so amazing.
She sees everything in a very non-dualistic way and you notice that in the way she talks, how she explains the way she sees now everything.
I thought that something like that was going to happen to my nothingness hahahaha…
:-P

Just forget about everything for 5 seconds. Take a deep breath. What is left?

I know there’s nothing there, it’s just life doing what is supposed to do. There’s no separated being doing anything, it’s impossible.
It can’t happen.

There's no one to be frustrated, but my ego feels frustrated. :-(

There is no one and no ego that is frustrated. There is frustration.
If there is frustration, there is frustration. No need for an I or an ego. Just let frustration be.

I agree, there’s no frustration at all right now. That’s good. But if there was, there's no one to be frustrated. Frustration is experienced and then it goes. No attachment to that.

One time I heard somebody who gave satsang tell the following:
"Everybody thinks I am giving satsang here, because my spiritual journey succeeded.
But the contrary is true: it is because my spiritual journey totally failed"
After that he laughed for 5 minutes.

I liked that very much.

Hehehehe… so true. I am a failure too
:-P

So congratulations your journey failed. So far, so good.

Does that mean that I can give satsang now?
:-P

Warmest regards, Petrus

Regards Peter and thanks again!!!

Daniel

[Petrus]

Hi Daniel,

I thought that something like that was going to happen to my nothingness hahahaha…

For everybody it is different. Expectations, expectations...
Maybe you look now at what more you expect?

So congratulations your journey failed. So far, so good.

Does that mean that I can give satsang now?

Haha, just failing is not enough: did you fail totally yet?

Warm regard, Petrus

[abrakamowse]

Hi Daniel,

I thought that something like that was going to happen to my nothingness hahahaha…

For everybody it is different. Expectations, expectations...
Maybe you look now at what more you expect?

No, hehehe... there's not "me" to expect nothing really. I really want to just observe how life is revealing itself without "me".
:-)

So congratulations your journey failed. So far, so good.

Does that mean that I can give satsang now?

Haha, just failing is not enough: did you fail totally yet?

Total failure! hehehe...

Warm regard, Petrus[/quote]

Thanks a lot Peter!!!! I appreciate your help and good disposition!

[Petrus]

Hi Daniel,

Try meditate on who is meditating.
Tell me your findings.

Warm regards, Petrus

[abrakamowse]

I'll do that Peter, I let you know.

[abrakamowse]

I got it now Peter!!!

"I" am not meditating!!!! "I" am being meditated!!!

There's nothing there!!! I see it now!!
:-)

[Petrus]

Hi Daniel,

I got it now Peter!!!

"I" am not meditating!!!! "I" am being meditated!!!

There's nothing there!!! I see it now!!
:-)

What is the difference between meditating and being meditated?

What do you see?

Who is getting what?

Regards Petrus