Daiczech, this one is for you.

[Ilona]

Ok, let's work through the sticky bit. I'm around today, so we can clear everything up.

What I noticed from your last message is that you right there, but can not step through yet.

Look again at what is real: thoughts are real. Content of them- isn't always pointing to real stuff.
Feeling is real.
Experiencing is real
Story is real, but it's a fictional story.

Does that make sense?
What is that glue that holds illusion together?

[daiczech]

What is that glue that holds illusion together?

Just come back after 4 hours digging on our allotment. Body is humming along, brain a bit dull.
Yes,I can see the differences between the real and the unreal that you mention.
Will think about the sticky bit and write again.

[daiczech]

Ok, let's work through the sticky bit. I'm around today, so we can clear everything up.

Hi, Ilona
This is an interesting situation as I can't find the sticky bit this p.m.
I've had two deep meditation sessions in the last 24 hrs. and there is a definite sense that a shift has occurred.
However, it's too early to be sure so I don't want to jump to conclusions.
It seems that the sense of "I" is still there, but only as a sense and not with any reality behind it. In the past it has identified with the body and mind and hooked itself onto anything that they experience, boosting the impression of a separate existence.
The main way it is hanging on is by trying to be identified with my consciousness. By this I mean, there is mind, there is body and there is conscioussness/awareness of the phenomena going on there.
The question arises "Am I this consciousnes?" If not, what is it?
Moreover, it's difficult to address a question such as "Do you exist?" There is a sense that it's been looked at and decided on already. Can't get excited over it.
Is this real or am I just exhausted from physical activity?
It feels important to check this out thoroughly. We've come a long way in a very short time.

[daiczech]

Have found two areas of stickiness this morning.

The sunrise was spectacular but there was a sense of holding back on my enjoyment of it because an identification with a self was coming up in the enjoyment.
When reflecting on this, there was a sense of holding back from letting the thoughts do their thing in case it led to an identification with self again.
In other words, there is a lack of confidence about letting it all be as it is. A lack of trust that life can be allowed to run ahead in its own way.
There is also an inner movement towards letting it all happen without restraint in the hope that deeper insights may follow while a sense of caution and reluctance holds me back.
What is going on here, please?

[Ilona]

What happens when somebody who is drinking all his life suddenly does not get any more alcohol? It's a massive hangover and a detox.
What happens here is the same. You saw through illusion and you want sudden results, but, hey, there is a hangover, cleaning up time, it's not an instant change, all programming that was happening through years is still there. Identification is there, but can you believe now that you are a separate entity identifying with labels?

Is there a 'me' in any shape or form?

[daiczech]

Identification is there, but can you believe now that you are a separate entity identifying with labels?

Is there a 'me' in any shape or form?

No. There is no separate entity, just labels.
There is no "me".
There is a hanging-on, memories, loose identification - what you have called a hangover.

It seems I should stay around these thoughts and feelings for a while and look at them again and again, for days, perhaps longer. Are you happy for this to happen? Don't want to be without your perceptive advice yet. Would like you to be there during detox.

[Ilona]

That is what the aftercare group is great for. :)
Is there any doubt at all that you haven't seen the absence of separate beings?

[daiczech]

That is what the aftercare group is great for. :)
Is there any doubt at all that you haven't seen the absence of separate beings?

There is no separate being. No doubt I have seen this. It's pretty simple when you see it although complicated beforehand, because of habit, emotions, thoughts and, in my case, fear.

For me, it is much easier to look at others and see if they have a separate entity which is them - no chance. It's almost laughable.
Am I like other people? Yes.

Then I sit in meditation and let the doubts and other feelings arise. Simply by looking at them they start to dissolve and it's possible to see clearly through the illusion.

[Ilona]

So happy that you made it through. :)